Once Upon A Half-Time: A Secret Baby Romance (38 page)

“I won’t tell her you said that.”

Rick kept laughing. I ended the call.

My phone immediately buzzed. I bit my lip.

Nate
.

Part of me actually fluttered as I considered answering. I had no idea why, but I wanted to hear his voice. Except he would want an explanation I couldn’t give.

His messing around bothered me, but I wasn’t just a jealous lover. I knew the type of man he was and why it was a bad idea for me to get too close.

This wasn’t about me. I had to worry about the baby.

I hated to do it, but I ignored the call. I didn’t pocket my phone. I expected Nate to call back, like he had done all week.

I gave it a solid two minutes.

The phone stayed silent.

And that hurt most of all.

I
sat
outside the country club, waiting for the right moment to confront Mandy.

I was done with this passive aggressive bullshit.

Mandy refused to answer my calls, texts, or emails? Fine. Then I’d talk to her face-to-face. Explain myself.

Except I had no idea why I felt the need to justify my actions—especially since I fucked the other bridesmaids
before
I slept with her.

And I didn’t know why it pissed me off so much to be ignored. Or why it panicked me.

Or why it…hurt.

I wasn’t in the wrong. I did exactly what she wanted.
She
asked me to stay at the cabin.
She
walked with me to the dock.
She
was the one whispering
don’t stop
.

So why was I being punished? Hell, why did I even
care
?

Easy. Because Mandy was keeping something from me.

She had no reason not to trust me and every reason to answer my calls and give me an honest explanation of what
really
bothered her.

I’d never hidden the truth from her, so why was she so damn secretive with me?

Bryce gave me the info on the family tour of the venue. The Prescotts and Washingtons were doing a walkthrough of the reception hall for last-minute measurements and pictures. It was the only place I could pin Mandy down.

I shouldn’t have gone to find her, but if I didn’t untangle myself from her now, I’d be knotted up forever.

And if we were being
real
honest? I’d make sure those ropes bound us together
tight
.

Lindsey decided to get married in my family’s church, humble and quiet, but she demanded the party be held in a ritzy country club, the type that demanded their security deposit in gold. I stalked inside, prepared to grab Mandy and get my answers.

I was used to pissing women off, but they never
cried
in my presence. Never wasted a tear on me.

Mandy did, and I wasn’t going to be the man who caused any woman pain.

Especially her.

Mandy sat on the edge of an indoor fountain, tickling her fingers through the water. She smiled at the patient assistant who volunteered to lead her family on a tour.

How the hell did this woman get more beautiful every time I saw her?

If she was a magnet, I was the rusted lump of metal dragging along the ground to avoid smashing into her.

Soft. That’s what she was. A vision of softness, gentleness, and peace. Her curves accentuated a distinct femininity, something no other woman I’d slept with had ever possessed. Even her eyes looked brighter. They widened, the golden honey burning amber the instant she saw me.

She wasn’t happy to see me, but I was the lucky son of a bitch fortunate enough to see her.

She stood, crossing her arms. I memorized her mouth, the angle of her cheeks, the way her ebony waves cradled over her shoulders. Her hair fell over the swell of her chest.

I shouldn’t have gotten hard while Mandy coiled for a strike, but damn, I couldn’t keep myself away from her. Something drew us together, and if I couldn’t satisfy my lust, I could at least satisfy my curiosity.

Mandy frowned. “What are you doing here?”

“We have to talk.”

She excused herself from her family, flinching as her steps on the marble echoed in the grand hall where Lindsey and Bryce’s mothers envisioned arches and fine silks and flowers—all ivory.

“I’m busy,” she said. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“This won’t take long.”

She crossed her arms. “No. It won’t. I have nothing to say to you.”

“Good, cause I wanted you to listen. Can we go somewhere?”

“No.”

I hated to do it, but I let my gaze wander to Lindsey. “That’s fine. I’m sure there’s plenty of people who’d like to hear me.”

Her jaw tightened before she surrendered. Mandy grabbed my arm, but she said nothing when I flexed my bicep.

I missed playful Mandy. I’d get her back.

She dragged me through the hall under the pretense of surveying the ballroom. We didn’t make it there. She shoved me down the isolated corridor leading to the bathrooms.

“What do you want?” Her voice strained. “Haven’t you caused enough trouble?”

Trouble
? I had been a fucking gentleman. “I did everything you wanted. I stayed when you asked me. I left when you threw me out. Don’t punish me for what happened.”

“I’m not. I’m punishing myself.”

“Why?”

“Because I was an idiot to trust you.”

“Why don’t you now?”

“What’s there to trust? I knew you fucked anything on two legs. I can’t believe I let myself think that you were…”

“What?”

Mandy shook her head. “Nothing.”

“No.” I didn’t let her walk away. I thrust an arm to the wall, blocking her escape. “Tell me. What did you think I was? What did you think happened between us?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Obviously it matters.”

“Yeah, to
me
. But you’re not the type of man who cares about others. You don’t care about how I feel or what I want or why this is so hard for me.”

The anger heated me, but it wasn’t directed at her. The insult
hurt
. “How the hell would you know what I care about? Fucking ask me sometime. You might be surprised.”

“I’ve had enough surprises lately. I can’t handle any more.”

Cryptic again. I was getting real tired of that shit. “What do you want from me?”

“I don’t know.” It was the first honest answer she gave, and the possibilities surged through me with a newfound strength. “I need space. I need time to think. It’s too hard with you and the wedding and my family and…everything else.”

“Maybe you’d feel better if someone helped you out.”

“Who? You?”

“Yeah.”

The answer shocked her as much as it surprised me.

I doubted she’d believe me. Doubted even more she’d understand why I asked for the chance. Was it too much to hope that she’d just drop her guard? Maybe smile?

I didn’t speak. I tugged on her hand, pulling her close. I had no idea what I was doing, but if I didn’t touch her, everything inside me might have scrambled, drunk on her, but suffering the hangover of her withdrawal.

I threaded my fingers through her hair. She gasped. I loved that sound almost as much as a touch of her fingers or the grip of her tightness.

She could lie to me, hide secrets from me, but her breath was honest. She sighed with pleasure, huffed with impatience, and revealed everything in the quiver that was her exhale.

I never read a woman as easily as I could Mandy, but she kept so much tucked inside her.

What did I have to do to be the man she trusted with those secrets?

I kissed her. At least she couldn’t keep her desire from me. She could lie, but even she couldn’t bluff through that coiling heat.

“Nate—” Her fingers curled in my shirt. “This is wrong.”

“Why?”

She kissed me with a groan. “I can’t let myself do this.”

“Then blame me.”

“Believe me, I do.”

I flicked my tongue over hers. “Don’t push me away.”

“Stop pulling me so close.”

“Impossible.”

Her back struck the wall. I didn’t let her go, didn’t have to release her. I was bigger, stronger than her. She was pinned, and she knew it.

But a single mew between her kisses would have dropped me to my knees.

Instead, her fingers tightened over me. She tried to search the hallway. We were alone. She had nothing to worry about but me.

“This is wrong.” Her words trembled. My cock turned to stone. “You aren’t good for me.”

“Isn’t it more fun to be bad?”

“It’s not safe.”

“I’m not dangerous…” Only a little. “I can keep you safe.”

“From you?”

“From yourself. From overthinking this. From any guilt or shame or…” I nipped her neck. “Denying yourself everything I can give.”

“I’m not the type of girl who does this.”

“I won’t tell anyone if you won’t.”

I searched the hallway. If I didn’t find a quiet place, I’d fuck her right there in the corridor.

The bathroom would work. I kissed her, long and deep, preventing her from changing her mind and destroying us both in horrible indecision.

She followed me, step after trembling step, unwilling to part from my kiss.

That was good. As soon as I had her in the bathroom, I’d drive into her against the wall. She could kiss me all she wanted while I fucked her, her legs wrapped around me, buried deep inside that slick pussy—

The doors crashed open. We tumbled inside.

But we weren’t alone.

Mandy pushed from me, her mouth dropping open.

Nothing
we had done prepared her for this vulgarity. Hell, I had to find special places on the internet to see this sort of shit.

A couple occupied the space, rutting with a series of animalistic grunts. Their noises, motions, and slamming thrusts slapped their sweaty flesh in a sticky cadence.

A black, middle-aged woman rode a helpless man, cracking her hips over his in an aggressive reverse cowgirl that slammed her girth down so hard it hurt my balls.

She slapped his dark thigh and growled from deep in her throat.

“That’s right…give it to Momma!”

Oh.

Sweet.

Jesus.

I froze, unable to grab Mandy or hide her eyes. Her choked cry echoed through the entirety of the country club.

“
Mom
?”

“
M
andy
, I have
needs!
”

Oh, God, she followed me into the main hall of the country club.

Why would she
follow
me?

I covered my eyes, stumbling anywhere I could hide from what I just witnessed.

I had my pick of traumas—emotional, mental, social, existential…

Pretty sure I lost my faith too, somewhere around the time Mom thanked Jesus for the man’s personal endowments.

I crashed into the fountain, stumbled, and would have tumbled into the water if Nate hadn’t caught me. I wish he let me fall into the water, then I might have washed that discovery off of me, but I probably needed acetone or another industrial solvent for that. Holy water. A priest.

An exorcist.

Lindsey was not at all amused. She stomped her feet and squealed.

“What in the
world
is going on?”

“No words,” I whispered.

I blinked, forcing the Lovecraftian image out of my head. That horror remained in my sight, like I’d stared straight into the sun. Oh, to be one of the lucky bastards who had the foresight to sear out their retinas.

Mom stormed into the ballroom. Thankfully she had put on clothes, but I think she left her bra somewhere in the bathroom.

Her words repeated in my mind.

Give it to Momma
.

Her steps stopped before me. When we were little, Mom insisted Lindsey and I look at her when we were being punished. Not today. Never again.

I was
certain
she didn’t have time to wash the fingers she pointed at me.

“Don’t you dare lecture me!” Mom scowled. “What you saw was an adult thing.”

I didn’t know what I saw. I didn’t want to
remember
what I saw.

I had just caught my
mother
sneaking into a public restroom to have sex with a stranger…

Because I was about to do it too!

Although Nate wasn’t a stranger.

…And neither was the man who ran after her.

Nate had stayed quiet until now, but he swore in shock once he recognized Mom’s chosen partner.

“Holy
shit
.”

Marcus Washington jogged after Mom. He said nothing, but rejoined his equally perplexed wife.

Oh my God.

Mom was having an affair with the groom’s
dad
?

Mom crossed her arms. That helped to reduce the wiggle of her unsecured chest, but it couldn’t undo the damage. All I envisioned was the absolute earthquakes that were her mamma-jammas lopping this way and that as she pile-drived her chosen conquest.

“What the hell is going on?” Lindsey demanded. “Stop
embarrassing
me!”

“It’s perfectly natural, Mandy!” Mom wasn’t letting this go. “I will
not
have you shaming me.”

“I…I didn’t shame,” I said. God, she was angry. Then again, I would be too if I had been interrupted before I…ugh. “I will never, ever talk about it again, Mom.”

Lindsey groaned. “
What
happened?”

Mom’s voice rose. “I had hoped you were mature enough to understand that sometimes a woman needs to be pleasured.”

Lindsey’s mouth dropped open. Nate shuddered.

The
entire
country club staff and its guests stopped to stare.

Hiding in a hole wouldn’t do it. I planned to rent some machinery and dig a pit large enough to bury my entire family from regular society.

“I’m sorry, Mom,” I said. “Let’s just drop it.”

“We are all sexual beings! There is nothing wrong with two consenting adults exploring their desires.”

Nate nudged me. “That’s what I’ve been telling you.”

I gritted my teeth. “
So
not the time!”

“I mean…if you have questions…” Mom shook her head. “Lord knows you haven’t found a man yet. I never needed to worry about this conversation with you.”

Done. That was it. I was done.

“It’s fine, Mom.” I stepped back. “Look, you guys have the venue stuff handled. I’m going to…go. And I might be back for the wedding.”

I bolted for the exit as my sister lost her mind.

Nate followed, and I was too shocked to shoo him. He led me to his car and helped me into the passenger seat. We sat in silence as we contemplated ways to purge the memory from our minds.

“So…” He started the car, but he didn’t drive. “That was your mom…”

“Who was the man she was…?”

Riding?

Gag.

“Gotta tell you, baby, I don’t make a habit of recognizing men based on their…meat, mid-grind.”

“I think it was Bryce’s dad.” I bit my lip. “Marcus ran into the hall after her.”

Nate laughed. “Great. This is a special kind of fucked up.”

“Take me home?”

He agreed, though just as the heebies shook out of me, the jeebies smacked me full force. I recognized the SUV in the corner of the parking lot.

“Oh no.” My stomach dropped. “
Dad
’
s
here? He’s gonna walk into the middle of all of this. What if he finds out that Mom is…”

Nate shrugged. “Doing what? They’re
separated
. Didn’t they sign the divorce papers?”

“It’s not final.”

“Well, your mom was one good bounce away from drying the ink on her signature.”

I gasped. “How can you say that?”

“Baby, they’re adults. They can do what they want.”

I guessed that included hurting each other and destroying thirty years of a life together.

But Mom had sex with the groom’s
father
!

This wasn’t just going to tear the family apart; it’d ruin the Washingtons
and
decimate the entire neighborhood. Our families were friends. We grew up together, helped each other,
married
each other.

Was
no one
happy anymore?

Hell, Lindsey and Bryce were fighting more and more, especially once he learned about the first “Dirty Dance” he’d have with his bride. Mom and Dad couldn’t be in the same room together. Now Marcus and Darla had infidelity problems.

Damn. The only person who had it right was Nate. He kept out of relationships and commitments, and he was happier for it.

Maybe he knew best.

I didn’t want to think why it comforted me that he drove me home and walked me to my door, but Nate knew how to make me smile. Laugh.

Melt.

I let him inside my apartment, and it wasn’t even against my better judgment. I just…

Wanted
him there.

He had been to my apartment before…the first time we fooled around. Sure, it wasn’t his classy bar or his beautifully renovated apartment on its second floor, but I liked my place. It was tiny, but it got me away from home during college and kept me away once I graduated. Dad’s advertising company did well, but I didn’t have enough saved for a better place.

Besides, I had planned to find a home once I met the man of my dreams. We’d save for a house, have a small wedding, and then start a family.

Happily ever after, right?

My life was just a little out-of-order.

“You okay?” Nate asked.

He eyed the bed in the corner—miraculously made this morning without laundry stacked over the comforter.

“I can run to the bar, get us a six pack if you want to drink it away.”

The closer we got to the wedding, the harder it was to refuse a drink. Apparently, the only way people survived the last few weeks of planning was to write the toasts while toasted.

“I’ll survive.” I plunked onto the couch. “I just didn’t expect to walk in on
that
.”

“Front row show too.”

I gave an awkward laugh. “At least it wasn’t a role reversal. Had
we
been in there a couple minutes earlier—”

“I don’t know what you saw, but from my angle it looked like they had been going for a
while
.”

“Oh gross!” I smacked him with a throw pillow. Nate grinned, seizing it from me to retaliate. I ducked away. “Haven’t I suffered enough?”

He shrugged. “The ladies’ room was occupied. Nothing stopped us from using the men’s.”

“Do I look that depraved?”

“Like mother, like daughter.”

I huffed, grabbing the rest of the pillows on the couch to pitch at his head. Nate laughed, blocking the shots. He smiled, and that damn grin fluttered me into quiet confusion. It was sexy enough to make sneaking into bathrooms in public places seem…fun.

Something about Nate made me wild, but even at his most wicked, he seemed so gentle and passionate and so easy to…

I sucked in a breath.

Well, that was a trap I set for myself, and I nearly fell in head first.

If I wasn’t careful, I’d keep tumbling around Nate, perpetually off-balance and trembling and aching to touch him.

I tugged a pillow back and clutched it to my chest. It wasn’t the best defense against him, but I wanted to be cautious. If Nate hadn’t noticed a difference in my body at the cabin, I doubted he’d randomly guess about the baby now.

His
baby.

I liked the sound of it.

“So what do we do?” I asked.

Nate smirked. “About what? Dangerous question, baby. You might want to be more specific.”

True. I had too many questions and not enough courage to ask them.

What do you want to do about the baby? How do we handle having a child? Would you like to be involved? Do you think it’s okay that we aren’t together?

...
Should we get together?

Like
that
wouldn’t create a mess of complications. I’d stick to the stickiest issue at the moment.

“What do we do about my mom and Bryce’s dad?”

Nate answered immediately with a decisive wave of his hand. “Absolutely nothing.”

“
Nothing
?”

“Not our problem.”

“But he’s
married
—”

“You can’t save everyone’s relationship,” Nate said. “Hell, most people can’t save their own. He knew what he did, and so did your mom.”

I squeezed the pillow. “Just feels…crummy.”

“It shouldn’t. You’re too fixated on everyone else’s relationships.”

He stretched out against the couch, arms on the back as if baiting me to scooch close and snuggle against his chest. That was the type of thinking that got me in trouble in the beginning.

“Hell, you’re too obsessed with relationships in general,” he said.

“At least I’m giving them some
thought
, unlike
you
who runs at the first sign of commitment.”

“I’m not afraid of commitment.”

“Then why haven’t you found someone yet?”

“Who says I haven’t?”

My throat closed. “Have you?”

“There you go again.” Nate teased. “Always thinking of other people’s love lives instead of your own.”

“Believe me, I’m focused on mine.”

“Are you?”

I answered honestly. “Why do you think I keep pushing you away?”

“I’d love to know.”

He curled a finger for me to come closer, but there was only one way that game would end. I shook my head and dug into my side of the couch.

That only baited him.

I should have stopped him.

I should have pushed him away.

Nate crawled over me, pinning me in the corner with a hand on the couch’s arm and back. The pillow was a good choice. It kept a solid four inches between us, enough room that I’d have to lean forward to take a kiss.

And that was a dangerous and foolish thing to do.

“You were saying, baby?” Nate shifted, knocking my legs open so he could get even closer. “Why do you keep pushing me away?”

I was doing a really lousy job of it now. “Because you’re bad for me.”

“Am I?” He leaned a little closer, and his hoppy, masculine scent dizzied my head. “Be honest.”

“You’re the only man I’ve ever let this close.”

“That doesn’t make me bad for you.”

“It doesn’t make you
good
.”

“I think you’re scared.”

I smirked. “I’ve already had sex with you, Nate. A couple times. I can’t be scared of that anymore.”

“Maybe you’re scared because you like it.”

“I think you know I do.”

“Sure, I’ve figured it out.” He dropped closer to me. Was he always this warm? I stared at his lips as he whispered. “But you’re worried about admitting it.”

“Okay. I admit it. I like having sex with you.” I shook my head. “Now what?”

“We do it again. And again. And again.” His lips touched mine, the tiniest graze. “And you’ll like it more and more each time.”

“This is why you’re dangerous to me. You make sex sound so…easy.”

He smiled. “It is.”

“And good.”

His voice rumbled. “It’s very good.”

“And simple.”

“I’m a simple man, baby. I gotta have air to breathe, food to eat, and you for everything else.”

His kiss was as sweet as his words.

“You shouldn’t say things like that,” I said.

“Why not?”

“I might start believing you.”

His hand caressed my cheek. “You should. I’m telling you the truth. When I say I want you…” He kissed me again, his tongue flicking mine. “I want you. When I say you’re beautiful.” He brushed the hair from my face. “I mean you’re the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen. And when I say I can’t stop thinking about you…”

His hand drifted along my hip. I imagined him touching low on my belly, where the baby rested.

I wished he might have done it.

“It means you’re the only girl I’ve wanted since I took you that first time.” His eyes flashed a deep and genuine green. “Mandy, I haven’t fucked anyone else since we hooked up two months ago. No one else could compare.”

Oh.

I wasn’t ready for that. For him. For his kiss or his touch or his honesty. He pulled the pillow away, or maybe I tossed it to the side. It didn’t matter. My arms circled his neck, and I surrendered to him.

His hands tickled my sides, aiming for my jeans. I didn’t protest as his zipper tugged down or my pants came off, but I searched him for any hint, any indication of what he expected.

Or what I expected.

“What happens after this?” I whispered. “When we’ve had each other again?”

“There you go, worrying about the future.” His touch silenced me, brushing his fingers along the warmth pooling between my legs. “I’m going to make sure you focus on
right now
. Don’t worry about what happens later.”