Once a Ferrara Wife... (11 page)

‘I know.’ His voice was a husky, apologetic groan. ‘But first I had to get your attention and I don’t know any other way. My brain isn’t working.’

And he had her attention, just as he’d known he would. As always, he knew exactly how to turn her into a shivering, compliant mass.

‘Mi dispiace,
I’m sorry.’ He murmured the words against her mouth so that even in this impersonal space, his apology was intimate and heartfelt. ‘I’m sorry about our baby. I’m sorry about your frightening experience. Most of all I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you. I have so many things to say sorry for I don’t know where to start.’

Tears that had been nowhere in sight when she’d stalked away from him suddenly sprang to the back of her eyes. ‘It’s too late.’

‘Ti amo. I love you, Laurie.’ His hands cupped her cheeks. His eyes held hers, refusing to let her look away. ‘I can see why you might not believe that right now, but I
do
love you.’

‘Don’t say that.’

‘I’ll say it because it’s true, although I’m the first to admit I’ve made a disaster of showing you. I’m clumsy and thoughtless but I love you. I love you so much I don’t know how I will cope if you’re not in my life and I’m too selfish to let you go.’

Thrown off balance, she rested her hands on his chest, steadying herself against the swoop of emotion that threatened to take her legs from under her. ‘You’ll cope perfectly. You always do.’

‘That isn’t true. For the past two years I have filled every hour with work to try and blot out the fact that you weren’t there.’

‘When I
was
here you barely saw me. Only at night.’ ‘Come back to me and that will change,’ he vowed. ‘I will change.’

‘You can’t change, Cristiano. You will be in mid-conversation with me and that phone of yours will ring and suddenly I’ll slide to the bottom of your list of priorities.’

‘Never again,’ he vowed thickly. ‘From now on you’re right at the top of that list and you’re staying there. I’ve learned that lesson.’

‘You’re incapable of changing.’

‘Give me a chance to prove you wrong.’

Never had the departure hall of the airport been so quiet. News of the dramatic encounter at the check-in desk for the Heathrow flight appeared to have spread and now it seemed that half the passengers were listening rapt to the exchange, grateful for any distraction from the boredom and unpleasantness of the airport experience.

And now everyone was waiting for Laurel’s answer.

‘People don’t just change overnight, Cristiano. You’re
so
competitive, you’re programmed to drive your business to the top. And the only reason you’re here fighting for me now is because you’ve lost me.’

The remaining colour disappeared from his face. ‘I can’t lose you. I won’t. I behaved appallingly, that’s true, but at least give me a chance to make it up to you.’

‘You can make it up to me by letting me board that flight.’ She had to get out of here, she thought desperately. She had to get on that plane before she fell for his smooth patter all over again. ‘Thanks for the apology. I appreciate it. And if you really are sorry then the best thing you can do is leave me to get on with the rest of my life.’

The trouble was that there
was
no smooth patter, Laurel thought numbly. This normally fluent man was stumbling like a teenager on his first date and the struggle affected her far more than any degree of polished sophistication.

Exasperated with herself for still standing here when she should be boarding the plane, she watched as he fumbled in his pocket and drew out a slim rectangular velvet box.

‘I bought you a gift.’

Laurel looked at the shape and relaxed slightly.

A diamond necklace.

This, at least, was a predictable response.

She had a diamond necklace for every row they’d ever had.

‘Goodbye, Cristiano.’

‘No!’ He opened the box and the words froze in her mouth because nestling on a bed of blue velvet was an old rusty key. ‘What on earth is that?’

‘It’s something I bought for you two years ago.’ In the background a flight was called and his expression went from desperate to determined. ‘I’d like you to see what it opens before you make up your mind that we have no future.’

It wasn’t a diamond necklace.

Laurel reached out and lifted the key. It was large and surprisingly heavy. It looked as if it would open a gate of some sort, but she had no idea what gate or where it led.

Cristiano took advantage of her silence. ‘You say that I was
thinking of work all the time and not you, but if you come with me now I can prove that wasn’t true. I understand that you can’t suddenly bring yourself to trust me again, but would you at least agree to stay in Sicily for a few more weeks so that I can show you something?’

Despite her reservations, the key fascinated her and it was that, together with the growing awareness that their entangled love life was now the focus of everyone’s attention that weakened her resolve. Tired of playing the starring role in a drama she hadn’t scripted, Laurel looked at him. ‘I’m not promising to stay for weeks. But I’ll stay long enough for you to show me what this opens. Then I’ll decide.’

Her words were greeted by a ripple of approval from the crowd and Laurel felt suddenly trapped. ‘Don’t get any ideas. This isn’t forever. This is—’

‘—just to get us out of this hellhole,’ he muttered under his breath, flashing her a grateful smile that said he was feeling the same way as her.

He picked up her suitcase and the fascinated crowd parted in front of them. As they made it through the obstacle course of holiday luggage to the front of the building, applause broke out behind them and Cristiano rolled his eyes.

‘Are they clapping you or me?’

‘Probably applauding your pecs. You’ve had them on display for the past ten minutes.’

He glanced ruefully down at his open shirt but buttoning it up required releasing her hand or her suitcase and it appeared he was reluctant to do either. ‘I have an excellent personal trainer.’

Seeing his sports car parked at an odd angle in front of the terminal building, Laurel stopped dead. ‘What happened there?’

He viewed the evidence of his own dubious driving with
a pained expression. ‘My concentration wasn’t what it might have been.’

‘So it would seem.’ She watched as he stowed her suitcase in the boot. The key was heavy in her hand and still she had no idea what it opened. ‘Are we going back to the villa?’

The horrible feeling that she’d made the wrong decision lingered in her subconscious.

What difference was a rusty key going to make to their relationship?

Should she have held tight to the boarding card and climbed onto that plane?

‘If we go back to the villa we will be mobbed by my well-meaning family. The next part of our conversation is going to be conducted without an audience.’

‘So where are we going?’

‘It’s a surprise.’

‘I’m not big on surprises.’ Reminding herself that all she was giving him was the opportunity to apologise properly and without an audience, Laurel slid into the car. ‘Don’t you think you’d better go home first and change? Pick up some luggage?’ ‘No.’

‘You’re wearing half a tuxedo. You look ridiculous.’ Except that he didn’t. He looked insanely sexy, which just wasn’t fair because he’d literally dragged on his clothes and still had the attention of every woman in the airport.

Including her.

The engine started with a throaty roar and he turned to look at her, his dark gaze colliding with hers. ‘Do you care what I’m wearing? Does it matter?’

Even here, with horns blaring and people staring, chemistry flared hot and fierce.

She just couldn’t make it die, she thought desperately, feeling the air around them grow electric and her nerve-endings
start to sing. Shaken, her gaze slid to the gap in his shirt and then back to his eyes. ‘Don’t think sex is going to get you off the hook.’

‘I don’t think that.’ He didn’t smile. He didn’t flirt. For a moment she thought he was going to say something else and then his phone rang.

The timing couldn’t have been worse.

Tense as the string on a violin, she waited for him to answer it.

His hand automatically left the steering wheel to reach into his pocket and then he stopped and she saw the exact moment he made the decision not to take the call.

Laurel sighed. ‘Answer it. Your empire might be crumbling.’

‘Let it crumble.’ Instead of returning his hand to the steering wheel, he closed it over her cold fingers. ‘I know you don’t think I can do this, but I can. I want to. I am going to prove to you that our marriage matters more to me than anything.’

Instead of reassuring her, his words increased her own tension levels because she knew that even if they could somehow put the past behind them, a future was impossible.

She knew it wasn’t just a simple question of recreating what they’d had before.

Everything had changed.

Everything except for the dangerous chemistry that sizzled between them.

Even as doubts and obstacles rose in her mind, the firm pressure of his hand on hers flicked sparks of excitement through her body.

When she’d stalked out of the villa she’d been absolutely sure of what she was doing.

When he’d stumbled into the airport, she’d still been sure.

When he’d handed her that velvet box she’d thought,
Here we go again—he’s going to try and buy his way out of trouble.

And then he’d given her that old rusty key, splintering her jaded expectations and piquing her curiosity.

Material goods didn’t interest her much, mostly because she knew they were easy to come by for him.

But this was something different.
He
was different.

And this new Cristiano was infinitely more dangerous than the old one because she had no idea how to handle him. When he was on the attack, she attacked right back. When he was arrogant and controlling, she wielded her own brand of power and took him on. But this Cristiano—this humble, penitent, remorseful Cristiano was a person she hadn’t met before.

Confused, she looked away, thinking how unfair it was that the roughness of his jaw and his vaguely dishevelled appearance somehow made his dark Sicilian looks even more spectacular.

‘Just because I’m sitting in this car, don’t assume I’ve forgiven you.’

‘I don’t expect you to forgive me that easily.’ ‘Tell me what the key opens.’

A ghost of a smile touched that mouth. ‘If I tell you that there is no reason for you to come with me. I’m relying on your inquisitive nature to provide the opportunity for me to show you how much I love you.’

He spoke the words easily. He always had, she remembered. For months, she’d struggled to get them past her lips whereas he’d experienced no such barriers to expressing himself.

But, in the end, that love hadn’t revealed itself in his actions.

And now?

She stared down at the key in her lap. ‘I promised myself that I wasn’t going to do this. I promised myself that no matter what you said or did, I wasn’t going to change my mind.’

All she’d cared about was protecting herself from more pain and yet somehow here she was, back in his car and in his life, cocooned by expensive leather and the smell of luxury with that dangerous, incendiary chemistry threatening everything she’d worked so hard to leave behind.

If he’d released her hand it might have helped, but he didn’t. His fingers were wrapped hard around hers as he started the engine, and she knew he was fully aware of what his touch did to her and had no compunction in exploiting that advantage shamelessly.

Despairing of herself, Laurel leaned her head back against the seat. ‘Give me one reason why I should do this.’

‘Because I deserve another chance.’ The engine gave a deep, throaty growl. ‘Because what we have is special enough to keep fighting for.’

Was it?

Finally he released her hand but only so that he could place his on the wheel and steer them out of the nightmare traffic that clogged the airport road.

Whether this was a good idea or not, it was too late to rethink it because he found a gap in the traffic, pressed his foot to the floor and sped out of the airport.

C
RISTIANO
drove fast, skilfully dodging the heavy morning traffic until the road cleared. He pressed his foot to the floor and the car shot forward like a racehorse towards the finishing line, lightning-fast. Laurel smiled slightly as she felt the burst of speed and power because she loved it as much as he did.

Or maybe it was just because the top of the car was down and the sun was shining down on them, making everything impossible seem possible.

It was all still there, of course—the doubts, the worry and that other nagging emotion that he knew nothing about. But right now, with the breeze lifting her hair and the sun warming her face, she could push it to the back of her mind.

She wouldn’t have admitted it in a million years, but she loved to watch him drive. Loved the confidence with which he handled the car, the subtle movement of his fingers as he shifted gears, the flex of powerful thigh muscle as he urged the car forward. Cristiano made driving a car sexy. To her, everything he did was sexy and that incurable attraction had always been her downfall.

Dragging her eyes away from temptation, Laurel anchored her hair with her hand and glanced over her shoulder. ‘No security?’

‘I think I may have run them over when I left the villa. I was in a hurry.’ His swift smile managed to be disarming
and devastating at the same time. ‘Don’t worry. I’m capable of protecting you and anyway, there is security where we are going.’

‘Oh.’ Her hopes of staying somewhere discreet and private dashed by that revelation, Laurel tried not to feel disappointed that there would be other people around. ‘Where
are
we going?’

‘It’s a surprise. But you can trust me to have your happiness at the forefront of my list of priorities.’

She could have pointed out that her happiness had been right at the bottom of his list of priorities in the past but she could see he was trying so she bit her tongue and said nothing.

‘Have I been there before?’ ‘Not exactly.’

Resigned to the fact that he wasn’t going to reveal anything before he was ready, she leaned her head back against the seat and just watched the countryside. ‘We’re driving towards Mount Etna. You’re going to drop me into the crater of an active volcano and finish me off for good?’

‘Tempting.’ The corners of his mouth flickered. ‘And yes, we’re driving towards Mount Etna.’

Her eyes fastened on the peak in the distance. ‘I’ve always loved this part of Sicily.’

‘I know.’ They were off the
autostrade
now and climbing upwards, the car waltzing round the bends under Cristiano’s expert control.

‘Taormina?’ Her heart gave a little jump as she realised where they were going. ‘You’re taking me to Taormina?’ It was the place they’d spent part of their honeymoon and she’d been dizzy with the romance of the place. Yes, it was a favourite tourist haunt but with good reason. It was stunning.

The medieval town that had inspired poets and authors for centuries perched on the cliff whilst beneath lay the sparkling
perfection of the Mediterranean, its surface reflecting all the colours of a peacock’s wing.

As the sea breeze lifted her hair and cooled her skin, Laurel’s smile faltered. ‘Are we going back to the same hotel?’

‘No. I wish you’d trust me.’

‘I’m trying.’

‘Try harder.’

That was all he would say and she held her breath as he negotiated a narrow road, one side of which fell into an almost vertical drop down to the sea.

This was Sicily at its most spectacular, mountains and sea coming together in dramatic perfection and there, carved into the hillside, was the Teatro Greco, the ruins of the ancient Greek theatre that was one of the most famous archaeological sites in Sicily.

It was the most breathtakingly seductive place she’d ever visited.

Leaving Taormina behind them, he drove on and Laurel was just coping with the thud of disappointment that this wasn’t their destination after all when he stopped the car by a pair of tall, imposing iron gates. All around them were dark cypresses, olive trees and pines. Orange and lemon trees filled the air with their unforgettable Mediterranean scent and for a moment she closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

Even without looking she would have known she was in Sicily.

‘Do you have that key?’

Roused by his voice, Laurel opened her eyes and stared at the gates and then at the key on her lap. ‘This key opens those gates?’

‘Try it and see.’

She stepped out of the car, feeling the sun burning her head. The jeans she’d worn to travel back to foggy London were too hot for this climate and suddenly she couldn’t wait
to change into something cooler. Without the movement of the car to cool the air it was baking hot, the ground dry and parched from the lack of rain.

Despite the less than encouraging volume of rust clinging to the handle, the key slid joyfully into the lock but before she could turn it the gates started to open.

The car inched forwards behind her. ‘I admit that I added a few mod cons,’ Cristiano confessed, his smile apologetic. ‘The key is symbolic rather than essential. Get back in. It’s too hot to walk.’

‘Walk where?’ But Laurel climbed back into the car, noticing for the first time the security cameras above the gates. And then they were driving down a dusty lane bordered by olive groves and almond trees that she suspected had been there for centuries.

Here the air was scented with mimosa and jasmine and the sun beamed down on them as if smiling on their choice of destination.

Intrigued, Laurel glanced at Cristiano but his eyes were on the lane as he carefully negotiated the uneven surface. ‘As you can see, this is a work in progress.’ Grimacing as he picked his route, skilfully protecting the undercarriage of the car, he finally pulled up in a shaded courtyard.

Laurel’s jaw dropped as she saw the magnificent honey-hued building. ‘It’s a castle?’

‘Welcome to Castello di Vicario. The east part was built as a monastery in the twelfth century but the monks were booted out by a Sicilian prince with big ambitions who expanded it to house all his mistresses.’ Cristiano leaned back and stared at the building with satisfaction. A profusion of Mediterranean flowers snaked up the walls and cascaded down from balconies, tumbled in colourful bursts against the sun-baked stone. ‘Because of the views and the seclusion, it was used by artists and writers from all over Europe.’

‘But who owns it now?’

‘We do.’ With that simple response, Cristiano sprang from the car and greeted the two Dobermanns who bounded from nowhere.

Laurel gasped as she saw the dogs, suddenly understanding his remark about already having security. ‘Oh.’ She was out of the car in a flash and down on her knees in the dust, hugging the dogs, laughing and crying as they licked her and greeted her with the same dopey enthusiasm she showed towards them. Within seconds she was covered in dust and paw prints but she didn’t care.

When they were first married she’d hated the level of security he’d insisted on but the one compromise she’d been prepared to make was the dogs. With his customary wry humour he’d called them Rambo and Terminator and she’d taken them everywhere with her whenever she left the security of his offices in the hotel. Losing the dogs had been another reason she’d been broken-hearted to leave the island.

Cristiano watched with amusement as the dogs kicked up dust. ‘Why didn’t you ask me about them?’

‘I didn’t dare. I missed them so much—’ She hugged Rambo tightly, pressing her face into his smooth black coat as he whined his pleasure at seeing her again. ‘I couldn’t bear hearing that you’d sold them or something.’

‘I would never have sold them.’ There was an odd expression on his face as he watched her.

‘No, I don’t suppose you would.’ She played the pouncing game with Terminator as he barked for attention. ‘They’re far too valuable.’

‘That isn’t why.’ His gaze enigmatic, he gestured to the door. ‘Are you interested in seeing your home?’

Home?

‘This is where you live now?’ She rose slowly to her feet, one hand still on Terminator’s head. The significance of it
wasn’t lost on her. Taormina was their place. It was the place they’d shared their first kiss. The place where he’d first told her that he loved her.

All the best parts of their relationship had been played out in this exquisite corner of the island. They’d strolled hand in hand along flower-decked streets, they’d enjoyed leisurely meals in one of the many intimate piazzas, but nowhere they’d stayed had been as perfect as this. As private, as exclusive—
as romantic.
‘When did you buy it?’

‘I bought it while we were married but it needed a lot of attention. It was supposed to be a surprise.’

The shock of it made her heart skip a beat.
‘While
we were married?’

‘It was my gift to you. From the moment I saw how much you loved the place I wanted to find somewhere. It took me eighteen months to persuade the owners to sell. Another six months to make the necessary alterations.’ He breathed deeply. ‘And then you left.’ The raw emotion in his voice brought the lump back to her throat and her eyes met his.

When he held out his hand, she hesitated because voluntarily putting her hand into his felt like a big step and she wasn’t sure she was ready to take it. She experienced a painful moment of indecision and then she slid her hand into his and heard him exhale slowly.

It was a huge leap of faith and he apparently understood that because his fingers closed tightly around hers as he led her round the side of the house to a terrace that overlooked the sea.

‘So, what do you think? Does it meet with your approval?’

Laurel looked up at the
castello
and felt overawed by the beauty of it. His wealth had always been part of who he was, of course. It was impossible not to be aware of it, but it had never interested her particularly. She’d always thought there was nothing his wealth could buy that could move her.

Until now.

She turned her back and discovered that from the terrace she was looking at a one hundred and eighty degree view that took in the snow-covered peak of Mount Etna and the dazzling emerald sea of the bay of Naxos. And on the terrace itself, just metres from her feet, a series of infinity pools cut into the slope, each cascading into the one beneath, the insistent rush of water soothing in the humid heat of the day.

‘I think you have delusions of grandeur,’ she croaked and he laughed and pulled her into his arms in a possessive gesture, not giving her the chance to reject that spontaneous intimacy.

‘The pools are inspired, don’t you think? You always loved to swim so I told our architect to make use of the gradient to create something special. I always thought it was a good idea but I must admit it surpassed my vision.’

‘You saw us living here?’

‘Yes, for some of the time, at least. It was good enough for DH Lawrence and Truman Capote so it must have something special.’

Yes, it was special. Special in every way. But the most special thing about it was that he’d done this for her.

He’d done this for her while she’d been working the same punishing hours that he’d been working. She’d accused him of being a workaholic and now she was discovering that at least part of his working day had been devoted to building somewhere that she was going to love. Not somewhere he’d lived as a rich single guy but somewhere he’d chosen with her in mind.

Somewhere that was their own.

Her impression of him shifted into a different shape. Thoroughly confused and hating that feeling, she pulled away from him and he sighed.

‘Now
what’s going through that head of yours? Tell me what you’re thinking.’

She was thinking that this house, the fact he’d built it in the place she loved most on earth, was an enormous gesture. But it was a gesture with meaning. He’d built it for their future. For the family he’d imagined having. It was all part of his master plan. Looking at the olive groves, she imagined two small versions of Cristiano playing in the shade and then splashing in one of the beautiful turquoise pools.

Maybe he
had
loved her in his own way. Looking at what he’d created here, she was almost ready to believe that.

Which made the sense of loss even more painfully acute.

They ate lunch on a shaded part of the terrace, surrounded by the lavish gardens and fragrant citrus groves.

Laurel ate fish with lemon and herbs picked from the garden, her cheeks pale and her eyes tired as she pecked at her food. The dogs lay by her feet in a state of dopey adoration, refusing to leave her side as they panted in the heat.

And he was as bad as the dogs, Cristiano thought wryly as he waited for her to confide in him. He knew exactly what was on her mind. It didn’t take a genius to guess and he could have raised it but he wanted to see if she would do it without his prompting.

Aware that confidences were hardly likely to be forthcoming when things were so tense between them, he chose to steer the conversation onto neutral territory. ‘Where have you lived for the past two years?’ He watched, hiding his concern as she toyed with the fish on her plate, her usually healthy appetite clearly challenged by their problems.

Would she tell him what was worrying her?

‘I based myself in London.’

‘You didn’t touch a penny of your allowance in all the time we were apart.’

‘I wasn’t with you for the money, Cristiano.’

‘I would have supported you financially. I made that commitment when we married.’

He waited for her to make a pointed remark about the commitments he hadn’t made but she didn’t.

‘You’re surrounded by people who are only interested in you for what you can give them and you’re complaining because I didn’t want that?’

‘I wanted to provide for you.’ And the strength of that need shocked him because he’d always considered himself progressive for a Sicilian male.

‘Ah.’ Her eyes lifted to his. ‘The Provider.’

The past hung between them and he was acutely aware that although he’d provided for her materially he’d neglected her shamefully on the one occasion she’d reached out to him.