Authors: Michelle Janine Robinson
Lester looked at his sister with sympathy in his eyes. “You weren't alone. I don't know why you didn't reach out to me, no matter what was going on. I would have been there. Every time I think about that fool putting his hands on you, I want to wring his neck.”
“It's over now, Lester. Breathe.”
Constance looked over at Damita. “My brother is a bit dramatic at times. Ignore him.”
“I knew you guys were related. You look so much alike.”
“That's because we're twins.”
Damita smiled. “Wow, I'm an only child and I've always wondered what it would be like to be a twin; to have a constant companion.”
“It's a little different when you're of different genders. When I was being abused by my husband, Jack, I used to wonder if my twin had been a sister instead of a brother, would I have felt, or even been so alone. Men and women have different roles in families. Women usually stick together, whether it's mothers and daughters or sisters; they usually continue to spend a good deal of time with each other even after everyone is all grown up. It's different with men. When men grow up they start chasing women and eventually catch one or two, or in the case of my brother, three or four or five. They don't stay, like women do. Men move on.”
“When I was going through my stuff with my ex, I used to think things might be different if I had any sibling at all, which was strange because I had, I mean I have, a best friend who is like a sister to me. When things are bad you search for all sorts of reasons why it's so bad,” Damita said.
Constance and Lester looked at one another. They both were fully aware of the fact that Halle was hiding something. She hadn't shared what all of that was yet.
“I feel like we're living parallel lives,” Damita said.
“Was he physically abusive?” Constance asked.
“My marriage was
exactly
like yours. The only difference is I already had an established career when I met him. When we were dating I thought it was one of the things that attracted him to me, but as soon as we got married, he wanted me to quit my job and have babies. I was a VP, doing a job I loved and he wanted me to give it all up, just like that.”
“I assume things didn't end well?” Lester asked.
Damita frowned. “Not well at all. Come to think of it, they didn't begin all that well either. We were supposed to be on a flight to Jamaica the morning after our wedding. Instead of honeymooning in Jamaica, I spent my wedding night hiding in my walk-in
closet with the door locked. He hit me the moment we left our wedding reception and were back at home.”
“Sounds like Jack.”
“It's funny how things happen. When I left New York, I made out a list of things I needed to do. One of the things at the top of the list was basically, not to talk to strangers. Yet, here I am, talking to strangers.”
“I'm hoping we won't be strangers for long,” Lester said.
“Lester, lighten up would you. You remember how I was when I first moved to Seattle. I was scared of my own shadow. We want to help her, not send her running into the night.”
“She knows I'm playing.”
“No, she doesn't. Ignore him, Halle. Lester, explain to her what we did when I moved here.”
“I was going to school in California and then one day Constance calls me and tells me about what's been going on with her husband. She was afraid he would track her down and kill her. She decided she wanted to go to Seattle, but she wasn't sure how she would be able to get there with no money or stay there with no real skills and no job. This girl I knew had family in Seattle and when I told her what was going on with my sister, she hooked everything up for us. Once I was out of college, I wanted to come to Seattle and look out for her, but she was still so scared and told me that the first thing Jack would do would be to track me down and find out where I went after I left school. I stayed in California. Constance connected with some people, thanks to the girl I knew, and she's been here ever since. I moved here about a year ago, but it's been years and we've had no problems with Jack. Although, he was so old, he's probably dead now. Why on earth did you marry that old codger in the first place?”
Constance shrugged. “I've got daddy issues.”
“Hell yeah, you've got daddy issues. That man was about a hundred.”
“Don't believe him. He wasn't that old.”
Damita laughed. It was the best feeling for her to be able to laugh. She hoped whatever Lester and Constance had in mind for her would work. She was starting to like the idea of living in Seattle.
â¢Â  â¢Â  â¢
Constance's apartment was nothing at all like Damita's Upper West Side condo in Manhattan, but it felt more like home more quickly than that Manhattan apartment ever did. Constance explained to Damita how she had furnished the apartment mostly with things she had salvaged from throwaways, thrift shops and storage facility auctions. According to Constance she felt like the discarded belongings of others lent spirit to a home. She believed that the hearts and souls of others lived in their possessions and each discarded item she retrieved added that spirit to her home. In the living room, there was a brown plaid sofa with a burn mark on the right arm. The octagon-shaped coffee table was missing what Damita assumed was a piece of glass on the top. And, the kitchen table had the name
Sebastian
scratched in the very middle of the table. In the bedroom there was a bed that squeaked loudly whenever Constance moved in the middle of the night, that Constance said she salvaged from a storage facility auction. Instead of the white walls Damita was accustomed to in New York City apartments, Constance had painted every room in her apartment a different color. The bedroom was a shocking
Pepto
pink. The living room was beige and brown and the kitchen was Halloween orange. The bathroom, however, was white. Every time Damita walked into the apartment she couldn't help but smile. Rather than spend
all her money staying at a hotel, Constance offered to let Damita stay at her place. Damita paid half the rent and half the utilities and they each bought there own food, and every now and then Constance brought Damita along to her storage facility auctions, which Damita was surprised to learn, could actually be fun.
Within weeks, Lester and Constance had helped Damita get a new name, which was now Simone Ballister. She got a new social security number and a passport and credit cards in her new name. Next on the list was a driver's license. Driving never appealed to her but after moving to Seattle, she realized how important it was to take total control over her life and part of that was being able to do something that was a very basic component of life; driving.
“I can't believe you can't drive,” Lester said.
“It's not that I can't drive. I used to a long time ago. I was never very good at it.”
“What woman on this planet is a good driver?”
“Certainly not my sister, Constance, or any other woman I know, for that matter.”
Damita squinted at Lester. “That has got to be the most sexist thing I've ever heard. Do you even listen to yourself when you're talking?” Damita asked.
“Of course I do. I listen and then I'm usually very pleased with what I've said.”
“Really? You're kidding me, aren't you?”
“No, not kidding. I'm
completely
serious.”
Once Damita began to trust again, she realized Constance and Lester were great friends. Lester knew how much she wanted to get her driver's license, so he offered to help her. After several lessons, he thought Damita was ready to take the road test. She was terrified. It had been so many years since she had taken a road
test, she wondered if it was the same as it had been all those many years ago when she first took the test. Since Lester had been giving her lessons in his car that was the same car she used for the road test. She was glad she was able to use it. It was familiar and made her feel more comfortable.
Lester went with her to the road test site and waited. When she came back and got out of the car, he could tell immediately that she had passed. She was beaming and seemed genuinely happy.
Damita was grinning from ear to ear. “I passed, I passed, I passed,” she said over and over again.
“So I take it you passed,” Lester said.
“Yes! What are we going to do to celebrate? Why don't you call Constance? We can make a night of it.”
“I'll see if she's free. You can use the car to go on job interviews if you like. You must be sick of sleeping on Constance's couch.”
“Is she getting sick of me? I've overstayed my welcome, haven't I?”
“Are you kidding me? She loves having you there. You pay your own way and she loves the company. It's like her teenage pajama party days all over again.”
“Lester, where did you say you grew up again?”
“I told you, Constance and I grew up in the Midwest.”
“Somehow, I'm not surprised,” Damita said.
“What's that supposed to mean?”
“Did you actually say pajama parties?”
Lester looked at Damita confused. “What's wrong with pajama parties?”
“It's not something you hear anyone over the age of eight talking about having; at least not in New York City.”
“Damn! You ruined a perfect fantasy of mine.”
“What fantasy would that be?”
“I have this image in my mind of you as a teenage girl; nothing weird, mind you. You're maybe seventeen or eighteen years old, wearing some pink and white footy pajamas. Now you've ruined it for me.”
“Poor baby,” Damita said, tickling his chin.
Lester called Constance at work. “Guess who passed her road test?” he said.
“Good for her,” Constance responded, on the other end of the line.
“She wants to celebrate. Are you free?”
“I wish I was, but I have to work late tonight. You two get to celebrate alone tonight.”
“Yes, we do.”
After one night of
celebration
, Damita had broken her rule about dating too soon and Lester was smitten.
Constance smiled at Damita. “So, you like my brother, huh?” Constance asked.
Damita didn't know how to react. She was taken off-guard. “I do, Constance. Is that weird for you? I hope it's not weird, with me living here.”
“It's fine. It's the first time I've seen Lester calm down in a long time. He's always all over the place. I was surprised when he stayed here in Seattle. He only stays because of me. After everything that happened, he felt a little guilty and then, once he moved here, he was afraid of what might happen if Jack ever found me.”
Damita's look turned more serious. “Do you ever worry that he'll find you?”
“Every now and then I forget, but the experience with him was so traumatic, I can't forget for long. It stays with me. It will continue to stay with me my entire life. Just when I think I'm settled and not concerned about him coming after me, I'll hear a voice or wake up in the middle of the night after a terrible nightmare and I'm reminded once again that I lived that horrible experience. You must know what it's like?” said Constance.
“Yes, I do. That's why I'm still a little apprehensive about my
relationship with your brother. I blamed myself a lot for what happened between my ex and me. I kept thinking, if I wasn't the person I was, it never would have happened in the first place. I looked at relationships I had before Neal and I'm afraid of making the same mistakes all over again. Neal may have been the first man that beat me but he wasn't my first dysfunctional relationship. I want to pick healthy. I don't want to keep on making the same mistakes. It's hard, because I consider you my best friend and Lester is your brother. Normally, this would be the kind of thing I would talk to my best friend about, but I feel like I can't.”
“I know what my brother is like. He's immature, clingy and sometimes he can be downright silly. But, I also know his good side. He's got a heart of gold and he will go to the end of the earth to protect those he loves. But, you have to make your own decisions about Lester or any other man you decide to date. I don't want you to feel like we can't talk because you're dating my brother.”
Damita frowned slightly. “What happens if it doesn't work out? You and Lester are so close. If it doesn't work out things will be so awkward and uncomfortable.”
“Things will only be awkward and uncomfortable if we allow them to be.”
“That makes sense,” Damita agreed.
“If there's one thing I've learned after all of this, it's that we all control our own destiny. Of course, things happen that none of us have any control over, but we can control how we respond to the things that come our way.”
Damita said, “Amen to that.”
“Amen,” Constance agreed.
“So, now that we have my love life figured out, what am I going to do about a job?”
“I can help you out in that department as well.”
“You really think you can?”
“I'm sure of it.”
Constance walked over to the desk in the corner of the room and picked up a pad. She wrote something on it and handed the piece of paper to Damita.
“Show up here tomorrow at eleven. We'll get you going on a job. It may not be what you're used to, but it pays well enough and it's not grunt work. You're smart, so you'll pick things up a lot quicker than I did.”
“Don't say that, Constance. You're very smart. I've learned so much from you.”
“Thanks for saying that. But, I'm not book smart, like you are.”
Once again, Damita was reminded of the internal tapes women play that make it easier for them to become victims of domestic abuse.
The next day she showed up at the address Constance had given her. She was wearing a very professional navy blue suit and a white shirt. The minute Constance saw her she knew she had made the right decision to tell her supervisor she had someone for a position they had open.