On the Head of a Pin (12 page)

Scanning the rest of the missive, he realized that to all intents and purposes Spicer was illiterate. There was nothing he could do but set the record straight. “I'm sorry,” he said, “I did not encourage Mr. Spicer and I certainly did not lead him to believe that his appointment was a foregone conclusion.” In for a penny, in for a pound, he thought to himself. He went on. “In fact, I have severe reservations about the sincerity of Spicer's intentions.”

The elder looked mollified. He can't honestly have believed that I would have proceeded in that way, Lewis thought, speaking on behalf of the organizing body without the authority to do so? Apparently he had thought just that. Lewis felt the offence of it, but told himself to calm down. Things were upset enough within the Church without him adding to the turmoil.

“I think we're agreed, gentlemen, that we need not even proceed to the interview stage with this application,” another elder said.

The others agreed. “Perhaps, Mr. Lewis, you could save us all some time and trouble by informing the applicant yourself?”

Lewis's heart sank. So they did believe the worst of him. “I can prepare him for the news, but I believe that it is the duty of the Board to notify him in writing.”

“Of course, of course, we'll do that. I just hope he'll be capable of reading the letter.” There was a little snigger around the table at this. Again Lewis took offence, this time on Spicer's behalf. It was true that the boy was in no way fit to be a preacher, but the arrogance shown in his dismissal nettled him.

Spicer was waiting for him when he returned home. He hadn't even reached his door when the young man came striding along.

“Well?” he asked. “When do I start? Where are they sending me?”

“You'll be notified officially, Morgan, but in all fairness I have to tell you that they were paying close attention to the applicants' qualifications, and I'm afraid you fell a little short in that department.”

“Are you telling me they turned me down?”

“For the time being, yes.”

“But why? All I want to do is to serve the Lord. Why won't they let me?” Morgan's weaselly face was twisted, set in obstinate denial. His scowl did little to improve the unfortunate composition of his features.

“Listen, Morgan.” He chose his words the best he could to try to calm the young man down. “The Church has to be very careful these days. Our people are being accused of all sorts of things, from ignorance to downright treason. They have to make sure that everyone associated with the Church is of the highest calibre possible, in order to offset these accusations. They felt that some of your skills are a little lacking.”

“And what else did they say? I know there's more.”

“They weren't entirely sure of the sincerity of your intentions. It has been such a short period of time, you see, since you heard the call. They felt that you need to demonstrate your commitment a while longer before they can consider your application.”

The boy's eyes filled with tears. “How could they say that? You were there. You saw it happen, the day I was filled with the blessed presence of my Saviour. You could tell them they're mistaken.”

“No, Morgan, I couldn't. Not in all conscience.”

“Why not? You mean you don't believe me either? Well, I'll tell you something Mr. Lewis, I'll tell you what I think!” he was shouting now. “I think you're all jealous. I think you're all afraid I'll show you all up. That's why you won't appoint me!”

Lewis began to understand why Rachel had used the word
pest
. Spicer appeared to be one of those wretched people who can never admit to their own shortcomings, but must find an external excuse for them, no matter how far-fetched and ridiculous the rationalizations might be. Whatever happened to these people was never their own fault, but the result of some malign external force.

“Listen,” Lewis said, “this isn't the end of it, you know. You can apply again. You should sit down and think about what I've said, and try to do something to remedy the situation. You should find the necessary books and study them. You need to show constant desire to serve the Lord. You need to prove yourself to them.”

“I don't need to prove myself to anybody! I'm just as good as any of you are. You'll see!”

As he watched the pathetic little figure stomp away, Lewis had no real expectation that he would.

II

A
solution to his problems had presented itself to Lewis. At least he thought it might be a solution. He had broken the news to Betsy that they were to move again. She had kept her face impassive, but he could see in her eyes that it was a blow. She was still prone to relapses of weakness, when the fever would take hold of her again and it would be all she could do to get out of bed. Nevertheless, she uttered not a word of complaint. “I'll start packing,” was all she said.

The boys were less phlegmatic. They liked it where they were.

Will, at the age of seventeen, was courting a girl. He had apparently been planning to do something definitive about securing her affections, but the carpenter he worked for had reduced his hours, making it impossible for him to support a wife on what he was bringing in. Moving away would only compound his problems, and he was sure that the girl would find someone else if he wasn't there to nurture the romance. Lewis hadn't known how serious he was until his announcement that they were on their way to Elizabethtown.

“I'm not going.”

“Now, Will,” Lewis said. “Your mother needs your help.”

“I don't care, I'm not going.”

“If Will's not going, then is it possible for me to stay here too?” Moses asked.

Lewis reflected that he would never have dared go against his father's dictates when he was a young lad, but times were different now and young people more apt to make their own way. He sneaked a sideways glance at Luke, who was sitting with wide eyes at the end of the table. Luke would like to side with his brothers, he could see, but he didn't have quite enough courage to say so.

“Are you sure this is the girl you want?” he asked.

It was a question Will hadn't been prepared for. Lewis watched conflicting emotions chase across the boy's face — confusion, defiance, fear, a little pride.

“Yes.”

“Well, let me think on this. Maybe we can come up with a plan that will suit us all.” He had been considering his idea before he had even told them they were relocating, but he wanted to discuss it privately with Betsy first. He didn't know if she would agree or not.

He waited until the boys had wolfed down their suppers and Martha had been put to bed. He poured out the two precious cups of tea that were left in the pot on the stove and took one to Betsy.

“What's on your mind, Thaddeus?” After so many years of marriage, she could tell when he was brewing a notion.

“I've been thinking about this move. I know you're still not well, and I'm not happy with making you shift households again.”

“I knew what it was going to be like when you first started preaching,” she said. “I have no complaint.”

He smiled at her. “I know, you never complain, and I'm grateful for it. But the boys are a problem, too.”

“I had no idea Will was so serious about this girl. Aren't they awfully young?”

“Not really. They just seem young to us. Do you think Will is man enough to run a farm?”

“A farm? What farm? Where?”

“There's a place in North Marysburgh. The farmer wants to get out of farming, but he doesn't want to let the land go. He's willing to rent it out, and there's a nice house on the place.”

“You mean it for Will to run?”

“And for all of you to live there. I'd be willing to sign the lease if Will agrees to have you there. It's a good farm. If he applies himself, he can grow enough to pay the rent, and with a place that's been well-established for so many years there should be no difficulty feeding you all. It's not like starting out back in the clearings. If the two younger boys pitch in, there's no reason it wouldn't work.”

“And you'd go off to Leeds?”

“I'd get back as often as I could. The problem is, with everything in such a state of upheaval, I'm apt to be there for a year, somewhere else for a year, then somewhere else again the year after that.”

“And where would you live?”

He shrugged. “I'm on the road and staying in other people's houses most of the time anyway. What do I need a home for? The thing is, Betsy, I don't think you're ever going to be well until you can settle in one place for a time. And if we set Will up, the girl can take over with Martha and give you a hand in the house. I'll be sorry to be without you, but I'd rather have you away from me and getting better than with me and sick all the time.”

She hesitated, and then spoke her mind, as he expected she would. “The only problem I see is whether or not the girl will be happy with it. It will be her household, really, and I don't know her well enough to tell whether or not we can live under the same roof.”

“Then we'd better get to know her, hadn't we?”

Privately he thought Betsy was overstating the case somewhat. Many a family welcomed a daughter-in-law into the fold with little bother. It was what his own sisters had done — married and gone to live with their husband's folks. Occasionally there might be minor conflicts, but these were usually sorted out with a little compromise. He knew of a couple of cases where the issue was resolved by the simple expedient of building more house, so that everyone could have their privacy. He was sure everything would be fine.

Abigail Howe, known to all as Nabby, turned out to be a pretty, seemingly tractable young girl, who was obviously smitten with Will. She was excited at the prospect that the way to marriage was being smoothed so handily, and stated that she was perfectly willing to share a kitchen with her mother-in-law.

“It will be wonderful to have someone there to give me advice,” she said. “I'm not really confident about running a household all by myself. I'm sure I'll need all the help you're willing to give me, Mother Lewis.”

She couldn't have said anything that would have mollified Betsy more.

Marrying his eldest son was one of the last things Lewis did before he left the Hallowell Circuit. With the boys' help, and a wagon borrowed from a neighbour, they had moved their household effects into the small but comfortable house the farmer had built on his hundred-acre holding. It was decided that Martha was to sleep in the little slip room off the kitchen with Betsy, Will and Nabby would have the bigger main floor room, and the two boys would take the attic. The kitchen was large and spacious, with a good stove, and there was even a small front parlour, although they had no furniture for it. The farmer had not neglected his outbuildings. There was an excellent barn for the cow and a snug henhouse with a thriving flock of chickens. The orchard was well-established with mature trees. They would have apples, pears, and plums in abundance, and a row of currant bushes encircled the kitchen garden off the back stoop. Nearly everything they needed was right at hand, and if Will could produce a good crop of wheat, there would be money in hand, too.

Lewis did as much as he could to help Betsy get the household settled before the wedding. There would be no time afterward. He would leave for Elizabethtown the day after the ceremony.

Lewis had been quite proud of the little farm he had leased until he saw Nabby's father's place. The Howes' three-hundred-acre farm was in full production — there were twenty head of cattle, a large flock of sheep, and a huge orchard. The house had not one parlour, but two, and the Howes had furniture for both of them. Lewis wondered that Howe could manage it all, for he had no sons, just five girls — two older than Nabby, two younger.

“The two oldest were married last year,” the farmer told Lewis. “Nabby's been in a fever to get married ever since. “ He laughed a little. “I hope she's wedding because she likes your son and not just because she wanted a new dress and all the attention the other two got.”

“They both seem quite sincere,” Lewis replied, but the statement took him a little aback.

“Oh, now I'm just joshing you, Preacher. Although I must admit it was a surprise to me to hear that you've settled them on a farm. I'm not sure that Nabby could ever manage if your Missus wasn't there to prod her along a little.”

Lewis had little time to digest this information before the ceremony began, and then he was caught up in the memory of the first child he had sent into a marriage. His vision blurred a little as he thought of Sarah, and then of Rachel. He had hoped to say the plain Methodist words for her as well, but had never got the chance.

After the wedding breakfast, which was substantial and impressive, he helped Moses and Luke load Nabby's enormous trunk into her father's wagon, along with the bed that had been her parents' wedding gift. The girl had seemed a little put out at how quickly the celebration ended, but she was young and, he was beginning to think, a little flighty at times. That was probably just wedding nerves, nothing else. No doubt she would settle with time and Betsy's tutelage.

The next day he set off for Leeds not entirely convinced that his brilliant scheme was so clever after all.

III

T
here was a biting wind in Lewis's face as he rode along, a promise of the winter to come, but he was feeling content nonetheless. Support for the Methodists, and in particular the Methodist Episcopals, was strong on this circuit. Everywhere he went the lay preachers were well organized, with several class meetings and Sunday schools established. It made his job easier to simply fall in with the routine that was there, presiding at meetings on a regular rotation, counting on the located and lay preachers to carry on in the meantime. He was well fed and well housed everywhere he went, and the saving on rent allowed him to accumulate the small sums of money he sometimes received at marriages, funerals, and christenings. He found the scenery pleasant as he rode, the trees still clutching the reds and yellows of their autumn crowns, the rail fences marching in tidy protective lines around the pumpkins which had appeared as if by magic with the frosting of their vines. The cold wind notwithstanding, it was his favourite time of year, the trails solid and the bugs banished, the harvest gathered and wood smoke scenting the air.