On The Floor (Second Story) (5 page)

He seems nervous to suggest it, though I’m not sure why. I think it is a great idea and I tell him so. “That’s a really good idea, Jake. What do you think we could do?”

“So, the center I work in is for children with special needs. I do a lot of traditional music instruction, but I also have a class with younger kids where they play with all sorts of instruments. I was thinking that they could come to one of these classes and interact with the kids. We cover basic stuff, like dynamic, tempo, rhythm. It is a lot of fun and I think that some of the group on our floor might enjoy it.” He smiles up at me shyly and I can tell that he really and truly loves his job.

Jake isn’t only gorgeous beyond words. He is smart, sweet, and funny. He has passion for the work he does and the kids he works with. I can see it in his expression and seeing this side of him has me falling for the entire man, not just his pretty face.

But then I remember. Fuck buddies. I can’t be with a guy who only wants sex. That’s not for me. Plus, we're supposed to be friends.

I give him an encouraging smile. “I think that is a great idea! We can talk about it at the next meeting and put up a sign up sheet. I think they will have a lot of fun with something like that.”

“Cool!” he says excitedly.

We finish talking about the meeting we had earlier today and go over some of the expectations we have of one another as coworkers. When we are done he gets up to leave.

“Rachel, I’m really glad I got this job. I can’t wait to get to know you better.” He smiles thoughtfully and waves as he walks out of my room and across the hall. When he gets to his door, he looks over at me and smiles again before going in and shutting the door.

***

Jenna comes into my room later that night while I am studying on my bed. Sitting up on my desk she looks over at me expectantly. “So? How did it go with lover boy?”

“Don’t call him that. His name is Jake and he is my friend. We decided that since we work together it is best to just be friends, even though we are attracted to each other. Once we got that conversation out of the way, it got a little less awkward. And even though I wanted to rip his clothes off, we just sat and talked.”

“But you had the door closed. How do I know you’re telling the truth and not just starting some incredibly hot and steamy secret love affair?” she insinuates wiggling her eyebrows.

“Wait, how do you know the door was closed?”

“I came by to check on you a little after I left to make sure you were doing okay with the temptation. I thought you gave in. I was so proud!” She smiles and winks at me.

“Oh my god! I did not sleep with him. Even though I would have if he offered,” I smile and wink back.

“Who are you? Where is my ‘only after six dates and I have a commitment’ Rachel?”

“I know! I don’t know what has gotten into me!” Normally, I am way more reserved with a guy. But then again I've never felt this type of reaction in my body to someone.

Jenna smirks before saying, “I know what you
want
to get into you. It’s Jake’s cock!“

“Jenna! Seriously! I want to try to forget that I want in his pants. Not be reminded of it constantly. New rule. No talking about sex with Jake unless I bring it up. Okay?”

“Fine. But I swear if the end of the semester comes and you don’t tap that, you aren’t my friend anymore.” She smiles at me and jumps off my desk and comes to sit next me on the bed. “So, anything about him worth sharing?”

“Well, he is a double major. Music and special education. He teaches music to children with special needs at a center a couple of blocks away. He wants to do a trip there with the floor. Oh, and he is in a band.”

“He just sounds so sweet!” She gives me a knowing smile. “I bet you didn’t fall for him
at all
when he was telling you about the kids he teaches,” her remark full of sarcasm.

“Be quiet! He is very sweet. He will make a great
friend
.” But she is absolutely right. I did start to fall for him and I am only going to fall harder for this guy the more I get to know about him. I’m sure of it. I just have to keep it work related and then maybe I’ll be able to keep my sanity.

And keep reminding myself about what kind of guy he is: Fuck buddies.

“If you say so!” Jenna sing-songs and laughs at my reluctant determination.

How am I going to survive this semester with the world’s most perfect man living on the same floor and across the hall from me?

***

The week goes by without too many encounters of the gorgeous kind. Jake is busy getting to know all the freshmen and he stays out of his room a lot of the time. He has his job and his band, not to mention school. I am also pretty busy with classes and the beginning of the semester hubbub. By Friday, we have only really had quick conversations in passing and I am kind of hoping this is how the rest of the semester will go.

I’ve decided to stay in this Friday night. I try to stay in one night every weekend. I usually just hang around and do homework, keeping my door open in case any of the kids need something. Usually it is pretty quiet and I can get a lot done.

I am sitting at my desk with my headphones in listening to my music and writing a paper for my Ethics in Teaching class. I stretch back in my chair and look across the hall. I see Jake’s door cracked open and his light on. This is the first time I have actually seen him in his room since he moved in.

Sitting forward in my chair, I try to get back to my paper, but I’ve got nothing. I take my headphones out hoping that my distraction is the music and not the guy across the hall. Still nothing.

I lean back again and look at his door. It is still cracked open, but without my headphones in I can hear quiet music coming from his room. Whatever he is listening to is beautiful. It is a lone guitar playing a slow and sensual melody.

I find myself getting out of my chair and walking across the hall, drawn to the music. I get close to the door and put my ear towards the crack in the door and I realize the music isn’t coming from any speaker, it is Jake playing his guitar. I stay to listen for a moment longer and then turn to leave.

“You can come in Rachel.”

I stop and turn around to face his room with a guilty look on my face. How did he know I was here? I guess I’m not as stealthy as I thought I was.

“I can see you in the mirror,” he says answering my unspoken question. Sure enough, I look up and see him smiling at me in the reflection of the mirror in his room.

I push the door open and smile at him up on his bed. “I didn’t want to interrupt. Whatever song you were playing was absolutely beautiful. I didn’t realize it was you playing until I came out of my room. You are really good!”

“Thanks,” he says smiling shyly and looking down at his fingers that have begun strumming the guitar again.

He looks up and we both stare at each other in silence. I start to feel that same attraction that I have been avoiding for a week and since I can’t act on it, I feel the need to escape it. “Ok, well I’ll get going now. Writing a paper and all. Taking advantage of the quiet floor. Woohoo! Friday night!” I sing at the end raising my hand in the air. Why oh why must I continuously do embarrassing things in front of him? He must think I am the strangest girl he has ever met.

I look back at him and he is quietly laughing. But not in a “
you’re a weirdo
” way. It’s more like a “
you’re adorable
” way. At least I hope it is.

“I wasn’t bothering you was I? I was just playing around with some arrangements. I can close the door and play quieter if I was disturbing you.”

“No! You were fine! I just seem to have hit a bit of a writer’s block.” No need to tell him that thoughts of him are what caused my block.

“Well, in that case, do you want to hang out here and take a little break?” he asks.

“Um, sure? I mean yeah. Cool. We can definitely hang.” Ugh. Face palm.

He starts to chuckle again and seeing him like this- sitting on his bed and laughing in his loose jeans and long sleeved shirt barefoot with his guitar in his lap- has to be the hottest thing I have ever seen. Now why did I let my mind go there? I was doing so well!

“So how has your week been, Rachel?”

I take a seat at his desk. “Good. Pretty busy settling into a new class schedule and starting to get all the planning for the activities underway. How about you? I haven’t seen you much.”

“A lot of the same. Plus band practice and the kids at the center.” He pauses and then adds, “You know I can help you with the planning and stuff, right? I am actually really excited about it.” He smiles at me.

“Well that sure is a change from last semester.”

“Rachel, I know you are used to doing all that stuff yourself, but we can split the work or do it together. I don’t want you to resent me for not putting in my share.” He looks worried that I might resent him already. “I’m your partner in crime, right?” he jokes lightening the mood.

“Oh, gosh. You remember that embarrassing moment?” I say, my cheeks reddening.

“I thought it was adorable,” he says smiling.

“I bet. And don’t worry about me resenting you, Jake. Ty didn’t help me because he was too busy getting wasted to care about his job. You are busy tutoring children with disabilities. Your reason is totally acceptable if not swoon worthy.” I did not just say that, did I?

“So you think I’m swoon worthy?” he asks me with a smirk.

“Oh stop! You know you are the whole package. I don’t think I can name a girl that wouldn’t swoon over you.” I say shyly to him, directing my eyes at the ground. I can’t believe I am admitting to him how perfect I think he is.

I look back up to see a smile playing on his lips. “Good to know.”

“Oh great. I’ve made your head swell even bigger!” I joke.

His expression changes into something more seductive and after a beat he says, “You’ve made something swell. And you’ve been making it swell ever since I first saw you.”

Gulp. “Um, okay…” Friends shouldn’t tell friends stuff like that.

“I’m just messing with you, Rachel,” he says shaking his head and changing his smile to something more friendly and reassuring, even though the look in his eyes tells me that wasn’t exactly the reaction he was looking for from me. “A friendly joke.”

“I know! I was joking too. You totally thought I was embarrassed! You’re so easy! I have to play on this innocent thing more often with you.” This is getting a little awkward. I was totally embarrassed. I wonder if he is buying this at all.

“What do you mean ‘play on this innocent thing’? You
are
innocent. I can tell. The face you made when I told you about my arrangement with Natalie. You looked like you swallowed a fly!” he says laughing.

"Natalie?" I ask a bit confused.

"The girl I lived with before I moved in here," he clarifies.

“Oh. And I did not look like I swallowed a fly!” I practically shout back.

“You did! You’ve never just hooked up with anybody, have you?” He looks curious.

“Nope,” I say trying to sound confident. There is nothing wrong with the fact that I haven’t had a one night stand. I’m not ashamed of that. It’s just that talking about this kind of stuff with Jake has me completely flustered.

“See, I told you. Innocent,” he says with arrogance.

His attitude is starting to infuriate me. “Hey! Just because I’ve never had a casual hook-up doesn’t mean I’m innocent. And even if I was, what does it matter? Why are you teasing me about it?” I say getting louder and louder with each word, my face red with anger. While I was talking to him, I stood up out of the chair and I am now standing in front of him while he sits silent on his bed.

He looks apologetic. He sets his guitar to the side and pulls me so that I am sitting next to him on his bed. We are facing each other as he continues to hold my hands. “I like that about you. I knew from that dance that you weren’t a one-time thing. You are too special for that. And the more I see you, the more I realize how good you are. Too good for me.” Then his voice drops so quietly that I almost don’t hear him. “I’m not good enough…”

“Jake,” I say. He is breaking my heart with the look on his face. With his words. Why does he think he isn’t good enough?

“Rachel.” We look into each other’s eyes. He looks so sad. I want to take his sadness away. I reach up and touch my hand to his cheek.

Right when I am about to tell him that he is good enough, his eyes harden and he pulls my hand from his face. He sits back and clears his throat. “You would want more than a fuck from me and I don’t want anything more than that from you,” he says bluntly. Then he picks up his guitar and starts playing again, trying to end our conversation.

“Jake, I don’t want anything from you but friendship,” I lie. “So if you ever need to talk about anything, I’m right across the hall. Open door policy,” I say smiling. I know he was trying to hurt me with what he said. There is something behind the sadness that was in his eyes.

“Yeah whatever. See you later, Rachel.”

“Yeah. Thanks for distracting me from my writer’s block. I should probably go try and finish my paper before all of those rowdy freshmen get back, huh?”

“Probably a good idea.” He hasn’t looked back up at me since he picked up his guitar and his face still has that hardened look to it.

I go back into my room and shut the door. I sit at my desk and close my laptop. There is no way I will be able to do homework right now. I have too much to think about.

For the rest of the night my thoughts are on Jake. I keep picturing the sadness in his eyes, wondering what it was that broke him. Wondering if I could be the one who can put him back together.

Chapter 4

My Saturday is spent finishing my paper, reading, doing loads of laundry, and looking forward to my night out with Jenna.

She went out last night and I received a text at three in the morning telling me she had found her new man. That means I’ll be saddled with the friend tonight. I am almost positive.