On the Brink (5 page)

That year, during the severe postwar economic downturn, my grandfather’s company fell on hard times. My father had to sell the ranch for next to nothing and return to Illinois to help his father manage a dying business. We lived in a small garage apartment in Winnetka for a few years before moving to a 75-acre farm in Barrington, a small town of some 3,500 people 40 or so miles from downtown Chicago. It was about as far as you could get from the city back then and still commute comfortably.

We always had horses, hogs, cows, sheep, and chickens, not to mention my pet raccoon and crow. I spent a lot of time doing chores—milking cows, mucking out stalls, baling hay. We churned cream for butter, drank milk from our cows. We put up food for the winter, butchering the chickens, hogs, and sheep. Mom froze vegetables from the garden.

My father had a fierce work ethic; he was industrious and thrifty. From the time I was very young, I understood that you didn’t lie around in bed in the morning. You didn’t stay in the shower for more than a couple of minutes. You got up; you worked; you were useful.

At one point, when I was nine or ten years old and the family was barely scraping by, Dad decided he’d cut our hair himself and mail-ordered a pair of clippers. He did such a bad job that he left bare patches on our scalps, then he filled in the bald spots with pencil and said no one would notice. It took several haircuts until Dad became proficient. These traumatized my brother, but I was largely indifferent to my physical appearance and to what I wore—a lack of fashion sense that I have not outgrown.

Real happiness, my father liked to say, came not from anything that was given to you, or that was easy to get. It came from striving to accomplish things and then accomplishing them. You had to do things right. If you left grass tufts sticking up when you mowed the lawn, you had to do it again.

But my father wasn’t all work and no play. He helped set up an extensive network of riding trails in the village, convincing farmers in the neighborhood to put up gates on their fields to let us go through on our horses. My parents took up skiing when they thought that my brother and sister and I might have an interest in it. I lived for the outdoors—and especially for fishing. My parents indulged this passion by taking us on wilderness canoe trips with difficult portages through Canada’s Quetico Provincial Park, just above Ely, Minnesota. (Not that this meant extravagance: my father once told me proudly that we spent less on our annual two-week trip than it would have cost to live at home.) Wendy joined us the summer before we were married, and later we brought our kids along on the canoe trips with Mom and Dad.

In 1958, just before I started seventh grade, my parents decided we were land rich but cash poor, so they sold the farm and moved us to a smaller place a little farther out of town. On our 15 acres, we had a barn, seven horses, and a big vegetable garden, but no more livestock. We had to buy our chickens and beef and milk in the supermarket like everyone else, though we still ate the vegetables that we grew.

I went to local town schools and then Barrington High. As a boy, I was very goal oriented. It’s what Wendy calls my gold-star mentality. I no sooner became a Boy Scout than I made up my mind to become an Eagle Scout, which I did, at 14. I switched my focus to school and excelled in football, wrestling, and my studies.

The idea of heading east to college came from my mom, who wanted me to go to Amherst. Its students wore coats and ties back then. Dartmouth College seemed uncouth to her, but I was recruited to play football there.

I loved Dartmouth. I made good friends on and off the football team—and my professors challenged me. I majored in English because I loved literature, and though I didn’t like economics, I took several courses in it, as well as lots of math and some physics.

I did well in football, despite my size: I was a six-foot-two-inch, 198-pound offensive lineman, often outweighed by 50 or more pounds by opposing tackles. Our coach, Bob Blackman, was a superb teacher who trained many other coaches. We won the Lambert trophy as the top Division 1-A team in the East in 1965 not because we had the finest athletes but because we were the best coached. As a senior I won the award for outstanding lineman in New England.

During two of the summers I was at Dartmouth, I worked at a Christian Science camp in Buena Vista, Colorado, called Adventure Unlimited. We climbed in the mountains, took float trips down the Arkansas River, and rode horses—I couldn’t have been happier. It was also terrific preparation for the future. The first year I was a camp counselor and the next year a unit leader, responsible for the oldest boys, up to 17 and 18 years old, as well as counselors who were older than I. It was a chance to manage and to lead.

Christian Science has always been a big influence on me. It is a religion based on a loving God, not a fearsome one. An authentic confidence comes out of this. You understand that you have great capacity to accomplish good that comes from God. Humility is at the core of the religion. As the evangelist John writes: “I can of mine own self do nothing.”

Christian Science is known to the public mostly for one aspect, physical healing, especially as an alternative to modern medicine and its drugs. There is, in fact, no prohibition against medical treatment. But I am comfortable relying on prayer because it has proven to be consistently effective for physical healing, for dealing with challenges in my career, and for spiritual growth.

In my senior year, several weeks before graduation, I met Wendy Judge, a junior at Wellesley, on a blind date set up by a friend. I was immature and behaved badly. We went to a Boston Pops concert, and she was not impressed when I folded my program into a paper airplane and sailed it off the balcony at Arthur Fiedler, the conductor. Wendy asked to be taken home early, and I thought I’d never hear from her again. But she called me up later and invited my roommate and me to come down for Tree Day, a Wellesley celebration of spring. So I had reason to think there was hope.

I graduated from Dartmouth in 1968, in the midst of the Vietnam War. As a member of the Naval ROTC program, I spent the summer before Harvard Business School on the campus of Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana. It was a strange place for the Naval ROTC—surrounded by cornfields with no water in sight.

Wendy and I started dating regularly my first fall at Harvard Business School. I did well enough there without studying too hard, and I spent much of my time at Wellesley. I was 22 and she was 21, awfully young, but we’d come to know each other very well. She was engaging and athletic, determined and competitive. We shared similar values and interests. Her dad was a Marine colonel, and she was on scholarship. A Phi Beta Kappa English major who loved the outdoors, she wore secondhand clothes, rowed stroke on the crew team, and was an excellent squash player. She earned all her expense money delivering linens and newspapers, and working as a tutor and a night watchman. She was extraordinarily trustworthy and knew her mind.

Wendy and Hillary Rodham Clinton were in the same class. They were friendly from student activities: Wendy served as senior class president, while Hillary was president of the student government. They stayed in touch over the years, and Wendy hosted one of the first fund-raisers in New York City for Hillary’s Senate campaign in 2000.

My earliest exposure to official Washington came between my first and second years at Harvard Business School. Like all Naval ROTC cadets, I was meant to go on a sea cruise in the summer. Wendy was going to spend the summer after her graduation teaching sailing and swimming in Quantico, Virginia. I was very much in love and wanted to be near her, so I cold-called the office of the secretary of the Navy and ended up talking to a captain named Stansfield Turner, who later became CIA director under President Jimmy Carter. I proposed doing a study on the issue of the ROTC on Ivy League campuses. At the time antiwar protesters were burning down ROTC headquarters at schools across America. Turner agreed, and my sea cruise turned into a berth at the Pentagon. My big achievement that summer was proposing to Wendy and getting married eight weeks later, before beginning my second year of business school. I moved quickly even then!

I finished Harvard the following spring, and we moved to Washington, where I started my first job, also at the Pentagon. I worked for a unit called the Analysis Group, a small team that undertook special projects for an assistant secretary of Defense. It was quite a team. I worked with John Spratt, now chairman of the House Committee on the Budget, and Walt Minnick, who would be elected to the House from Idaho in 2008. Bill George, who later ran Med-tronic, preceded us; Stephen Hadley, President Bush’s national security adviser, followed.

One project—ironic when you consider my tenure at Treasury—involved analyzing the controversial loan guarantee for Lockheed Corporation, the big defense contractor, which had run into trouble developing the L-1011 TriStar commercial jet. John Spratt and I were working directly for deputy Defense secretary David Packard, the legendary co-founder of technology pioneer Hewlett-Packard. Driving to work one day, I was so focused on my first presentation for him that I ran out of gas on the George Washington Parkway. I left my car beside the road and hitched a ride to the Pentagon, only to discover that I’d left my suit coat at home. Spratt scrambled to borrow something that fit me. When I finally got my opportunity to brief Packard about Lockheed, he responded as I would today—with great impatience. He took off his glasses, looked out the window, and twirled them, while I went on and on. He didn’t say anything. Wendy would say I still haven’t learned the lesson. I like others to be brief, but brevity is not one of my virtues.

Packard left Defense in December 1971. Not long after, I landed a spot at the White House on the Domestic Council, which was headed by John Ehrlichman. I joined in April 1972. It was an extraordinary time. The Vietnam War was winding down, but the country remained polarized. The economy was under great strain—Nixon had taken the U.S. off the gold standard the previous year.

I hit the ground running, working on a variety of matters such as tax policy, minority and small-business issues, and the minimum wage. I worked directly for a smart lawyer named Lew Engman, who was a great mentor. When he went off to run the Federal Trade Commission after the 1972 election, I took his place—a big promotion.

In early 1973, I became liaison to the Treasury Department, which was then run by George Shultz. Then the effects of Watergate crashed down on us. I had worked well with Ehrlichman. He was an impressive, dedicated person who cared deeply about policy issues. He gave me good advice, too. I remember him telling me that it was important not only to do the right things, but also to be perceived to be doing them.

Ehrlichman warned me off certain people in the White House, particularly Chuck Colson, the president’s special counsel.

“Nixon is a very complex guy,” Ehrlichman explained before the 1972 election. “He’s got a liberal side to him. That’s Len Garment. He’s got an intellectual side and that’s Henry Kissinger.” But, he went on, Nixon was also paranoid. “He’s never had an election that was easy. He thinks the presidency was stolen from him by the Kennedys in 1960, and that in ’68, if the campaign had lasted a couple more days, he would have lost. So he does not want to go into this election without a derringer strapped to his ankle. And that derringer is Chuck Colson.”

I ended up, of course, being disappointed in Ehrlichman, who served time in prison for perjury, conspiracy, and obstruction of justice; Colson was convicted of obstruction of justice. Seeing men who were one day on top of the world and in jail the next taught me an enduring life lesson: never be awed by title or position. Later, I would frequently caution young professionals never to do something they believed was wrong just because a boss had ordered it.

I didn’t spend a lot of time with Nixon, but I got along fine with him when I did. He liked athletes and enjoyed working with young people. I was not smooth, and I occasionally interrupted him out of eagerness to get my point in, but he didn’t take offense.

When I was getting ready to leave my post in December 1973, I was called in to see the president. I went into the Oval Office, and Nixon and I had a brief chat. I’d had this idea to improve the quality of education by replacing property taxes in inner-city and blighted neighborhoods with a value-added tax, essentially a national sales tax, and using the proceeds to fund a voucher system. “Let me tell you about this VAT,” Nixon said. “I liked the idea, but the reason I didn’t go along with it is because the liberals will say it’s regressive, which it is, but if they ever got their hands on it, they’d love it so much they’d never let it go, because it raises so much money so painlessly it would fund all these Great Society programs.”

The repercussions of Watergate had given me plenty of time to look for a job. I chose Goldman Sachs because I wanted to work in the Midwest, and investment banking would give me the chance to work on a number of different projects at once. Goldman had a strong Chicago presence, and I was impressed by its people: Jim Gorter, the senior partner in Chicago, and Bob Rubin and Steve Friedman, who were young partners in New York. My time in government had taught me that whom you work with is as important as what you do.

Goldman wasn’t on top of the heap then. It was not the leading underwriter or merger adviser that it would become; in fact, it was doing few deals. I spent a year training in New York before being placed in the so-called investment banking services unit: we were a group of generalists who learned all areas of finance and managed client relationships.

After that year, Wendy and I moved to Barrington, and we bought five of my father’s 15 acres from him. Then we each borrowed from our parents to build the house we still call home today. It’s a rustic house, nestled at the edge of a woodland on a hill looking out over a grassland. I cut the path for the driveway with a chain saw, built the retaining walls, and split most of the boulders for our stone fireplace. Wendy, who is mechanically inclined, installed the central vacuum system and built a large play area for the children.