On His Terms (12 page)

“Am I wrong?” he asked.

“No.” She wanted to drag her hand through her hair or fold her arms across her chest, but he compelled her to remain open. “Are you sure you have the patience for this? For me?”

“Yeah. I do. I consider it all to be part of your training,” he said.

For the first time, she understood that this couldn’t be easy for him, either. Why would he choose to tolerate a recalcitrant and stubborn woman when he could have his pick of already-perfect submissives?

In so many ways, he was an enigma. She’d learnt a little about him through online searches, but she only knew those things that put him in the press. It appeared he didn’t participate in any social networking, and even though they’d been together a couple of times, it occurred to her that she didn’t know much about him.

“You’re doing fine,” he assured her. “We’ll work together until you give up the struggle. I appreciate that you’re trying, that you’re thinking. I’ve told you before, you will never disappoint me.”

“But you tanned my hide last time, Sir.”

“You will be punished swiftly and harshly for a bad attitude and for not following rules,” he clarified. “But that doesn’t mean I’m displeased with you, just an aspect of your behaviour. Again, I’m going to fuck your ass. We can use the plug you already have, or we can use a larger one?”

“No. No, Sir. This one is fine.”

“On all fours, if you please.”

When she didn’t move fast enough, he tapped her with the cane to encourage her.

“Your choice, you can remain as you are or you can put your head on the floor and reach back to hold your buttocks apart.”

That wasn’t an easy decision. If she stayed as she was, it might be more difficult for him to get the plug in and out. On the other hand, if she moved, it would be easier to lose her balance. In the end, she asked, “Is it acceptable for me to…” Some of their conversations mortified her. “Stick out my bottom a bit?”

“Your decision,” he said. “Doms may not always offer you that choice. Be aware.”

“Yes, Sir.” She pushed out her rear in his direction, waiting with huge impatience.

“It’s customary to thank a Dom when he grants you a favour.”

“Sorry, Sir,” she apologised straightway. “And thank you for your generosity.”

“I’ll reinforce the lesson later.”

Her whole body went rigid. She’d already earned a punishment? Would she ever learn? Posture. Manners. Tone of voice. A million things went into making a good submissive and she despaired of ever remembering them all at the same time.

She felt him grasp the plug.

“The more you relax, the easier this will be.”

He pulled out the plug. She barely had time to absorb the shock of being stretched then having it out before he shoved it in again.

He pounded her relentlessly, and she was gasping and shaking, moving forwards and back as he fucked her with it. The dull throb of anguish overwhelmed her, leaving her unable to think.

“How is it?” he asked.

“It’s…” Horrible. Awful. Hideous. And unbelievably, as he continued, as she moved with him instead of fighting to remain still, she started to become aroused. She’d never imagined it was possible to get turned on from anal penetration, but she was. “Sir!”

“Yes?”

“I… Oh, my God, I think I might come.”

All of a sudden, with the plug out, he stopped.

She swore beneath her breath.

Silence shrouded the living room, and the temperature seemed to drop.

“Thank you for telling me,” he said.

Unreleased need vibrated through her. She had no idea how long it had been since she’d had an orgasm. Days? Weeks? “Sir?”

“I have no objection, in general, to letting you orgasm, but this was not the appropriate time. I’d prefer to keep you on the edge for a while longer.”

She gritted her teeth to keep her mouth shut. This submission thing became more and more difficult instead of easier.

“Since your ass is stretched and so wide open, I’m going to put in a larger plug.”

Instinctively she tightened her buttocks.

“It’s going in,” he said. “How difficult do you want it to be?”

She heard him moving around the room, and not knowing what he was doing made her crazy.

“Would you like to see it?”

“No.” She barely remembered to express her gratitude. “No, thank you, Sir.” Knowing what was coming might make it worse.

“I’m doing this because you didn’t remember to thank me earlier.”

More than anything, she wanted to look at him, see his eyes, maybe gather some reassurance from the way he looked at her. “I thought you were going to spank me for that?”

“There are many ways to reinforce lessons,” he said. “Corporal punishment is only one of several.”

“I think I prefer that, Sir, to something else you might choose.”

“As your Dom, I will make that decision.”

This relationship was a juxtaposition. The things she liked most about him, that he was firm and unyielding, were also the things she hated the most.

“You were going to have to work your way up to a larger plug, regardless. This just accelerates my timeline.”

“Yes, Sir,” she said, feeling miserable. When would she learn to keep her mouth shut?

“Look at me, Chelsea.”

She turned her head. Thankfully he had the plug behind his back.

“You are here for training. Of course you’ll make mistakes, plenty of them. That’s to be expected. We only have two weeks together. We have to move forward every day in order to accomplish what you want. I don’t hold grudges. I don’t expect perfection.”

His reassurance was all she needed to settle back down. “I understand, Sir. I’m ready.”

“Good girl.”

He moved, and she thrust out her rear again. She made a decision not to feel embarrassed. He was going to do this whether she protested or not. She could stall or use a safe word, but eventually his will would prevail. So why not get on with it?

Although she hadn’t heard him squirt lube on the plug, it was slick against her anus. He pressed it against her. This one felt big, beastly. She whimpered. She should never have complained about the smaller one.

He had only managed to insert it part of the way when he pulled it back out. “You can do this, Chelsea.”

“Do what, Sir? Be torn asunder?”

“Bear down,” he advised. He forced the thing in deeper.

“I… Fuck this!”

“Stop fighting me,” he said.

“I’m trying to cooperate, Sir.”

“In that case, relax your sphincter.”

She wondered how many more times he could say the same thing with different words? And when would she finally listen?

He worked the thing in, then eased it out, going a little deeper and farther each time. It was so much thicker than the other one. “I’m not sure I can manage this, Sir!”

“You can,” he said, his tone both encouraging and soothing.

She was afraid his determination was no match for her inability to take the plug’s girth. Feeling helpless, desperate for this to be over, she inched away from him, trying to escape.

“Stick out your ass, Chelsea.” He reached forward and took hold of her left shoulder to hold her in place.

She screamed when he stretched her ass even farther.

“That’s it,” he said. “It’s going in.
Now
.”

With his hand on her shoulder, he forced her backwards, and he shoved the plug deep.

Tears swam in her eyes. She hated this. Hated him.

“You’re there,” he said.

Like she had with the previous one, she felt her anus relax around the stem of the plug after it was completely seated.

“That looks hot, Chelsea.”

His approval made everything worthwhile.

“I really am looking forward to fucking you up the ass. Maybe even tomorrow.”

She gulped for air, trying to steady her trembling body. He stroked his fingertips up and down her spine. She appreciated the luxurious calm that enveloped her.

“How does the plug feel?” he asked.

She hated to admit it, but now that it was in, it wasn’t too bad. In fact, the full sensation, compounded by the fact he liked the way it looked, made her feel slightly sexy. How was that possible?

“Chelsea?”

“It’s fine, Sir.”

He squatted next to her and captured her face between his palms. “Did you want to thank me for putting it in you?”

Maybe in another lifetime
. She blinked back the tears that stung her eyes. “Thank you, Sir. I appreciate your patience.” When had she become such an adept liar?

He smiled, as if he’d read her mind and knew she hadn’t been telling the truth. But that didn’t seem to matter as much to him as the fact she’d followed protocol. “In future, Chelsea, I expect not to have to remind you. Please express your gratitude on a continual basis. For my attention, for teaching you, for punishing you, for my patience, everything.”

“Yes, Sir,” she whispered, entranced by the deep, rich depths of his eyes. She had never felt closer to him. “I know I am difficult, and I do appreciate you, more than you know. Thank you.”

“Was the carrying on worth it?”

“No, Sir. But it freaking hurt!”

“Did that change anything?”

“You know it didn’t, Sir.”

“Next time, when it’s either a bigger plug or my cock, push back and open yourself. It may not be easy, but it will certainly be more pleasant. But know this, Chelsea, your tears and protests will never sway me.”

“Yes, Sir. Thank you for that.” Her heart felt as if it might melt. In such a short time, this man had come to matter to her.

He moved one hand from her face and smoothed her hair.

It was as if no one knew her like he did. Because he demanded honesty, refused to allow games, didn’t let her get away with prevarication, held her accountable, pushed her through her feminine embarrassment, he’d seen aspects of her personality even she hadn’t known existed. There was a bratty part. She wasn’t proud of that. He’d also discovered fears she didn’t realise she had. For the first time with a man, she’d felt emotionally needy, and when she did, she didn’t have to ask him to hold her. Somehow he knew to do it.

“The Dom who ends up with you will be one lucky man.”

For a moment, she wished that man were him.

Chapter Six

“You may kneel back.”

That quickly, he re-established his authority.

He released her, and she shook her head to clear it. She’d be a fool to fall for him. He was her trainer. Nothing more. She concentrated deeply so she would please him.

“Nice,” he said.

It amazed her how much she loved hearing his approval. He stood near her, tall, masculine and for the moment, her entire world.

“Shall we discuss your training schedule? We have only a short time together, and a number of things to cover. Of course we will spend a considerable amount of time on anal.”

She wrinkled her nose, attempting to stay on even footing and not succumb to the emotion that was coming with every step she ventured deeper into submission. “I was afraid of that, Sir.”

“As well as holding your tongue.” He smiled.

She grimaced.

“We’ll also work on being bound and restrained, service and how to take a beating. We’ve had some time apart. Is there anything you’d like to add to your limits list?”

“No, there isn’t.”

“Your Dom will expect you to be excellent at giving head, so you’ll spend time practising that, as well.”

“I have my test results in my purse, Sir.”

“I’ll give you mine, as well.”

“Can I ask a question about that?”

“Of course.”

“We had sex at the Den…”

“Would you prefer we didn’t fuck?”

“No.” She chose her words. “I know you don’t want things to be confused, but I would like you to fuck me.”

“That’s no hardship,” he assured her.

“I also find it difficult when I’m naked and you’re dressed.”

“At times, I do that just so you are aware of your nudity. I think about what I’m doing at every step, Chelsea. If I’m dressed while you’re naked, it’s intentional, and I have a reason for it.”

“I understand, Sir.” And maybe she should be grateful, rather than pushing this. He was much less intimidating when he was clothed. She recalled his hot, muscular body, and rippled arm muscles. Yeah, much better if he stayed covered up.

“Is there anything specific you’d like to learn or spend time on?”

She was silent for a moment as she considered what she wanted to say. He expected her to reveal things that made her uncomfortable—that was part of the whole submission thing. She was accustomed to playing coy games with men, to teasing, to saying what they wanted to hear. But he’d proven he wanted much more than that from her.

“Chelsea?”

The knowledge that they would part after two weeks gave her confidence. It didn’t matter what she said, since they wouldn’t have a relationship going forward. The honesty demanded of a D/s left her a bit breathless. “I want to be able to endure whatever my Dom wants with confidence.”

He moved across the room to pick up the hated collar.

“With your permission, I’d like to see how well you’re doing on your postures.”

She suppressed a shudder. “Of course, Sir.”

He raised a questioning brow.

“I’ve been thinking, Sir. About this, about why I disliked it so much.” She paused and pressed her lips together.

“I would like to understand,” he said.

“Never mind.” She sighed. Admitting this to him was just too embarrassing.

“Any insight you can share is helpful to me.”

Just the sight of the black leather made coldness seep through her body. “It is more about the way you treated me than actually being restrained.”

“The spanking? The tawse?”

“No.” She shook her head. “I deserved that.” She looked at him. She understood why he’d been such a big success in business, despite the Bartholomew deal, and why many of the firm’s big clients had stayed with them. With the way he focused so intently, he had a way of making people feel listened to and heard. He didn’t multitask. He gave his full attention. His gaze seemed to miss nothing. “It was the whole way you were…”