On Dublin Street (10 page)

Considering me for a moment, Ellie leaned back against the tiled walls, seeming unaware of the steam clinging to them and now most probably dampening the back of her shirt. Her celebration was apparently forgotten in the face of my negativity. “There
’
s one thing you should know about Braden. He would never cheat. He
’
s not perfect, I know that. But let
’
s just say that he would never be that cruel or dishonest to anyone. Anytime he
’
s been in a relationship and his interest has waned and hopped onto someone new, he
’
s been honest with his girlfriend and broken it off before starting up anything with someone else. I
’
m not saying his attitude isn
’
t a little shitty, but at least he
’
s honest.”

Curious about Ellie
’
s surety, I took a sip of wine before asking, “Did someone cheat on Braden?”

She gave me a sad smile. “It
’
s not my story to tell.”

Wow
. If Ellie was being close-mouthed about it, Braden really must be sore over it.

“Suffice to say, he
’
s a serial dater. Completely monogamous but jumping from one relationship to the next. Holly lasted longer than most. I think it was because she took frequent trips down south.” Ellie then threw me a teasing, almost knowing look. “I wonder what girl has caught his interest this time.”

I eyed her carefully. Did she know? Had she witnessed the spark between us?

“And I wonder if she
’
ll finally be the one to knock him on his arse. He needs a reality check.”

I murmured an incoherent response, not wanting to encourage her thoughts in my direction.

“Sorry for interrupting your bath.”

“No, it
’
s fine.” I raised my wine glass at her. “You brought red wine. We
’
re all good.”

“Have you ever cheated on someone?”

Whoa. Where did that come from?

“Well?”

Was this an interview to date her brother?

Staring her straight in the eye so she would know I was being deadly serious, I replied more honestly than ever, trusting Ellie not to push me too much on the subject, “I never get close enough to anyone for that to be an issue.” My answer seemed to deflate her, and that only reaffirmed my guess that she
’
d been holding onto some kind of romantic notion about me and Braden. “I don
’
t do relationships, Ellie. I haven
’
t got it in me.”

She nodded, her expression a little lost. “I hope that changes for you.”

It never will
. “Maybe.”

“Okay. I
’
m going to leave you to your bath. Oh.” She stopped, turning back to me. “My mum cooks a big roast dinner on Sundays for all the family. You
’
re invited this Sunday.”

A sudden chill descended over my warm bath and I shivered. I hadn
’
t been to a family gathering since high school. “Oh, I don
’
t want to intrude.”

“You
’
re not intruding. And I won
’
t take no for an answer.”

I smiled weakly, gulping down the entire glass of wine as soon as she closed the door behind her. Feeling the wine churn in my gut, I sent up a prayer for a miracle that would get me out of the family get together.

***

Friday night I was running late for work at the bar. Ellie had decided to cook us dinner and it had turned into an unsalvageable disaster. We
’
d ended up eating out and losing track of time as we fell into deep discussion about our work
—
Ellie
’
s research and my book. Ellie had gone home to bed because of an awful headache that had come on suddenly, and I hurried to the bar. I shot Jo an apologetic look as I passed through and into the staff room. I was just shoving my things in my locker when my cell rang.

It was Rhian. “Hey, hon, can I call you back on my break? I
’
m late for my shift.”

Rhian sniffed down the line. “Okay.”

My heart stopped. Rhian was crying? Rhian never cried.
We
never cried. “Rhian, what
’
s going on?” The blood pounded in my ears.

“I broke up with James,” her voice cracked along with my belief.

I thought Rhian and James were solid. Unbreakable.

Fuck.

“What happened?” Oh God, had he cheated on her?

“He proposed.”

Silence fell between us as I tried to understand what she was saying. “Okay. He proposed, so you dumped him?”

“Of course.”

What was I missing? “I don
’
t get it.”

Rhian growled. Actually growled. “How can you of all people not get it, Joss? That
’
s why I
’
m phoning you! You
’
re supposed to fuckin
’
get it!”

“Well I don
’
t, so stop yelling at me,” I snapped, a pang radiating in my chest for James. He adored Rhian. She was his entire world.

“I can
’
t marry him, Joss. I can
’
t marry anybody. Marriage ruins everything.”

And it suddenly dawned on me we were entering our no-go area. This was about Rhian
’
s parents. I knew they were divorced, but that
’
s all I knew. It had to be something deeper, something worse, for Rhian to turn her back on James. “He
’
s not your dad. You
’
re not your parents. James loves you.”

“What the hell, Joss? Who the fuck is this and what has she done with my friend?”

I paused.  Maybe I
was
spending too much time around Ellie. She was rubbing off on me. “Fair enough,” I mumbled.

Rhian sighed in relief. “So you think I
’
ve done the right thing.”

“No,” I replied honestly. “I think you
’
re scared shitless. But from one scared shitless person to another, I know no one
’
s going to change your mind.”

We were silent, just breathing down the phone to one another, feeling that connection between us, that relief that there was someone else out there just as messed up.

“Have you thought about the reality of this, Rhian?” I finally whispered. “James with someone else I mean?”

A choked noise crackled down the phone.

My heart broke for her. “Rhian?”

“I
’
ve got to go.” She hung up. And somehow I knew she was hanging up to cry. We never cried.

Feeling a deep melancholy settle over me, I texted her to advise her to really think about things before she did anything she
’
d regret. For once, I wished I wasn
’
t so broken, so Rhian had a best friend who was strong and not afraid to love, to hold up as an example of what was possible. Instead, I was her excuse that she wasn
’
t being irrational. I was her enabler.

“Joss?”

I glanced up over at Craig. “Yeah?”

“A little help, please.”

“Oh sure.”

“You fancy a quick shag after work?”

“No, Craig.” I shook my head, following him out, too depressed to even banter with him.

***

Sunday rolled around before I knew it, and I was so preoccupied with my book and with Rhian, who kept avoiding my calls, and too afraid to talk to James in case he put another crack in my heart with his heartache, that I didn
’
t have a prayer
’
s chance in hell of coming up with an excuse to get out of dinner with Ellie
’
s family.

Instead I was bundled into a cab with Ellie, dressed in celebration of the hot day in my
Topshop
shorts and a pretty olive-green silk camisole. We took off for Stockbridge and stopped literally five minutes later outside an apartment that looked a lot like ours.

Inside, I was unsurprised to find the Nichols
’
home very much like ours too. Huge rooms, high ceilings, and a cozy collection of clutter that reminded me a lot of Ellie. Now I knew where she got it from.

Elodie Nichols greeted me with a very French kiss on either cheek. Like Ellie, she was tall and beautiful in a delicate way. For some reason I
’
d been expecting a French accent, even though Ellie had told me her mom had moved to Scotland when she was four.

“Ellie
’
s told me so much about you. She said the two of you have become fast friends. I
’
m so glad. I was a little worried about her when she said she was taking on a flatmate, but it
’
s all worked out nicely.”

I felt like I was fifteen again. Elodie just had that mothering way of talking down to you. “Yeah, it has,” I answered congenially. “Ellie is great.”

Elodie beamed, looking twenty years younger and very much like her eldest daughter.

Next, I was introduced to Clark, a kind of non-descript, dark-haired guy with glasses and a sweet smile. “Ellie says you
’
re a writer.”

I threw Ellie a wry smile. She told everyone I was a writer. “Trying to be.”

“What do you write?” Clark asked, handing me a glass of wine.

We had congregated in the sitting room while Elodie checked on something in the kitchen. “Fantasy. I
’
m working on a fantasy series.”

Clark
’
s eyes widened fractionally behind his glasses. “I love fantasy novels. You know, I
’
d be happy to read it before you send it off for queries.”

“You mean, beta-read it?”

“Yes. If you
’
d like?”

Remembering that Clark was a college professor and was used to grading papers, I was secretly really pleased by his offer. I gave him a small smile of gratitude. “That would be great. I
’
d really appreciate it. Of course, I
’
m nowhere near finished yet.”

“Well, when you are, just give me a shout.”

I grinned. “I will, thanks.”

I was just beginning to think I
’
d make it through this particular family dinner when I heard kids
’
laughter.

“Dad!” a young boy
’
s voice carried down the hall towards us, and then its owner appeared in the doorway. Running toward Clark, the small boy
’
s face was lit up with excitement. I guessed this was Declan, Ellie
’
s ten year old half-brother. “Dad, look what Braden got me.” He thrust a
Nintendo DS
and two games in Clark
’
s face.

Clark looked at them, smiling. “Is that the one you wanted?”

“Yeah, it
’
s the latest version.”

Looking up at the doorway, Clark clucked his tongue in mock disapproval. “It
’
s not his birthday until next week. You spoil him rotten.”

I jerked around, my palms instantly sweating at the sight of Braden standing in the doorway with his hand on the shoulder of a miniature version of Ellie. The teenager was huddled close to him, her thick bangs and short haircut exceptionally stylish for such a little thing. My eyes didn
’
t linger long on the mini-Ellie, who I deduced was Hannah. No, they slid up over Braden, drinking him in before I could stop them.

Attraction burned through my blood.

Braden was wearing black jeans and a grey t-shirt. It was the first time I
’
d seen him in something casual, the first time my eyes had access to his strong biceps and broad shoulders.

I felt a throb between my legs and looked quickly away, hating that he did this to my body.

“I know,” Braden answered. “But I didn
’
t want to have to spend another Sunday afternoon listening to Dec chew my ear off about the damn console.”

Declan just giggled, his triumphant gaze dropping to his game as he flopped down at his father
’
s feet and started loading in a
Super Mario Bros
game.