Off the Ice (The Penalty Kill Trilogy) (Volume 2) (14 page)

“
Damn, Presley. I didn’t have that planned at all.”

“
I needed you, Levi.”

“
Anytime, anywhere, Smarty.” And then he kisses me.

Levi

“Did y’all have a good time?”

“
Yeah, Pops. You didn’t miss me too much, did ya?” I smirk. We’re sitting in his living room, just us two because Smarty is with her parents for her and Trev’s birthday.

Pops laughs. “Nope. Barely even knew you were gone.”

I chuckle. “That hurts a little.”

“
Well, between you calling and you making Presley call me, it was just like you were here.” He tries to hide a smile. “What’s new with hockey? Anything?”

I tell him about the latest news, including the email I received earlier this week. He seems excited for me, but it just reminds me of all the opportunities and the big fact of possibly being a state away.

“And with Presley?” he asks. “What do you see when you think about your future with her?”

Pops looks extremely serious and I know part of that is because he’s come to love Presley too. He’s thinking about her just as much as he’s thinking about me. I run a hand through my hair before leaning forward to rest my elbows on my knees. When I think about Smarty, I can’t help but think about the various future possibilities. I love Presley and after how we started, I worry a little. Trust me, I want all those things with her. From living together to graduating and establishing our careers to being engage to getting married and having kids.

But I worry about disappointing her again and that I won't be able to keep her happy. Or I'll royally screw up again. I worry about what happens after college and whether or not our plans can go together. My father is watching me intently while I think about all these things.

“
Pops, I love her-”

“
But?” He raises an eyebrow at me.

“
No ‘but.’ When I think about my future, I just hope that it’s included in her plans.” I shrug like it’s no big deal. Pops nods but doesn’t say anything at first.

He takes a deep breath and says, “Don’t worry about it too much, son. Just remember that I met your mother in college and we thought about what would happen once that part of our lives was over. We made it work. It wasn’t always easy, but we weren’t going to give up on what we wanted.” Pops pauses, looking down at the wedding band on his finger. “Each other. We wanted each other. So we made that happen.” He glances up at me. “You both will be fine, so don’t worry.”

“Thanks, Pops,” I say quietly. We clear our throats at the same time and then simultaneously chuckle.

“
Okay, you’ve been here long enough, Levi. I don’t need you to start copying me,” he laughs.

We stand and I go and give my old man a hug before I head back to RU.

~ ~ ~

McCarthy’s team is throwing the twins a party tonight. That’s where I’m supposed to be right now, but no, I’m stuck in traffic because there was a wreck. I’ve been sitting here for twenty minutes, and I’m starting to get antsy. Red lights gleam as far as I can see, which isn’t that outrageously far because there’s a curve up ahead, but still. Another thirty minutes pass and finally, we start moving, slowly but surely. When I get to the party, I just want to find Presley, but I don’t see her. There are a lot of people here, that’s for sure. I recognize a JWU player and ask him if he’s seen Smarty.

“Uh, I think she might have went out back with Zack?” His words slur and he seems unsure of himself.

“
Thanks.” I pat his shoulder a little too hard before walking away. Zack’s here? Great. Why would they be way back here anyway? Quickly, my long legs gets me through the crowd to the back porch that is empty with the exception of Presley and Zack, sure enough. Before I can open the screen door to go outside, Zack, who is standing too close to Presley, leans forward and kisses her.

My heart stops.

Five seconds. It took five seconds of seeing her
kissing
him to turn and walk away. Memories of how my teammate said he thought he saw her holding hands with a guy and Sunny saying she thought she was with him and Marley rush forward. Presley lied to me. I shove my way through the damn people, so I can get out of here. My thoughts turn to earlier this afternoon with my father. The worries I had, the wants I told him about.

And she’s been playing me? With
Zack
? It doesn’t make any sense. I’m surprised and hurt and really pissed, especially since I’m walking away instead of beating the shit out of him. I get into my car, far too calm than I should be, and drive away. Presley, who was so jealous over an ex at the festival, has been lying and cheating on me.

What the fuck?

Is this her way of getting back at me? For what I did in the beginning? It doesn’t make sense. How-? I don’t get it. She’s been around my dad and other than the now obvious lying and going behind my back, nothing seemed wrong. I hit my steering wheel and keep driving until I get to where I want to be.

And I don’t even want to go there. Not when I feel this way. But it doesn’t matter because soon, I park my car and switch off the ignition. I don’t bother to even take the keys out. Seconds later, I’m sitting on that cold damn bench, staring at the engraved stone. My hands are clasped together in front of me, and I rest my chin on my knuckles. The last time I had these same angry, hurt emotions running rampant, overwhelming my heart, my mom had just died.

I clench my jaw, wishing that she was here so I could talk to her. But she’s not. My heart is beating like crazy, and it feels like it’s working on triple overtime, about to burst at any second and just stop beating all together.

What the fuck just happened?

The quiet around me is interrupted when my phone starts ringing. It sounds too loud compared to my surroundings. I fish it from my pocket and see that it’s Presley. For a second, I’m tempted to ignore her.

“
What?” I answer, and my voice is completely empty of any emotions.

“
Levi? Where are you? Is everything okay?” I can faintly hear the music in the background and wonder if she’s still on the back porch with him.

“
Everything is fine. You just enjoy your night with Zack, okay?” Again, my voice is bland and monotone.

“
What? What are you talking about, Levi?”

I squeeze my eyes closed and try to control my temper. “Don’t. Don’t lie to me anymore, Presley. It’s pointless now.”

“Levi, I’m not lying. I don’t know what you’re talking about. Tell me what’s wrong.”

My laugh falls flat. “You don’t know what I’m talking about? So is this where you tell me that you didn’t kiss Zack? That you pushed him away when he tried to kiss you? Or where you actually tell me that you did in fact kiss him for at least five seconds. Do you know what I’m talking about now, Presley?” It takes everything I have not to blow up at her.

Her voice is shaky as she says, “Levi. Levi, let me explain. It’s not what it seems. I swear. Please listen to me. He kissed me and I swear I pushed him away. I don’t want him. I want you. I love you.”

“
Yeah, I could tell as I watched you kiss him back. I could see exactly how much you love me.” A bit of anger slips into my voice, and Presley starts pleading with me.

“
It wasn’t like that. Please listen to me. I don’t want him. I want you.”

“
I don’t care anymore,” I say and then hang up, turning my phone off immediately. My eyes find their way back to my mom’s name. I do care. I care so much, but it doesn’t matter. It can’t matter. I’m not going to let it. I was fine before Presley, and I’ll be fine now without her. I stare at nothing as my eyes lose focus, and I sit on that stupid bench for hours. When I finally leave the cemetery, all I know is that I don’t want to be found for the rest of the weekend. I don’t want to see her or hear her voice. I’ll go stay at a hotel outside of town until Monday. I don’t want to deal with her until then.

Presley

The party was supposed to be a fun night. I wore some of my new sexy lingerie for Levi. I rode over with Marley and Trevor because I was going to leave with Levi later. I was having a great time, laughing, and hanging out. Then Zack asked to talk to me out back. We had been becoming closer, and I kept reminding him that we were just friends.

When we got out on the porch, he started telling me how much he missed me and how much he cared about me.

  “
Zack, we’re friends. That’s it.” I put my hand on his arm and gently squeezed. He grabbed me and kissed me. I didn’t know what to think, at first. I just stood there. Zack was
kissing me.
It was when he tried to slip his tongue in my mouth that I came back to reality and pushed him away.

“
What the hell?” I roughly rubbed my lips to remove the remnants of his lips on mine.

“
Pres, we belong together.”

I shove him as hard as I can and get away from him. I’m so thankful that Levi wasn’t there to witness that. I can’t believe that I trusted Zack. Damn, Levi was right. I knew that I should have been honest with him. But, it’s best that he doesn’t know what happen.

~ ~ ~

I can’t breathe after Levi hangs up on me. He knows. I was calling him to find out where he was, and he knew that Zack kissed me. Tears are in my eyes. I broke Levi’s heart. He trusted me, and I shattered it.

Anger builds up in me, like nothing I’ve felt before. I know that it is going to be bad, but it has to happen. I walk through the party, searching for Marley. I find some of Trevor’s friends and ask where he is. They tell me that he’s upstairs. I don’t care if they are having sex. I need Trevor and Marley.

Finally, I find them. Thankfully, they weren’t having sex. I can’t hold back the tears. Trevor catches me as I collapse on the floor. Marley keeps asking me what is wrong, but I can’t answer. It feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest. Levi is my everything and I can’t believe that I did this.

“Pres, tell me what happened?” Trevor is holding me tightly.

I’m finally able to tell them what happened and once the tears dry, the anger returns.

“Man, I know that face. You’re gonna kill someone.”

I nod at Trevor and stand up in search for Zack. I run down the stairs, and I hear Trevor and Marley behind me. I see him in the middle of the room talking to some guys.

“You fucking jerk!” I ball my fist and clock him right in the nose. I know it breaks, because I hear the crack and see the blood flow. “He broke up with me because of you. You were supposed to be my friend!” I shout at the top of my lungs. Trevor grabs my arms as I lunge for Zack again.

“
Let it go, Pres. Come on.”

I shrug Trevor off of me and get right in front of Zack as he grips his nose. “Don’t you ever come around me again. I hate you.”

I can’t even think as Trevor and Marley get me home. I don’t want anyone around me, and I tell them that I will call them later. I wait until they are gone, and then grab my keys and jump in my car. I hope that Levi will be at his apartment, and I race over there as fast as I can.

Nichols answers the door.

“Where is he?”

“
He isn’t here, Pres. I swear.”

“
Then tell me, please.” My voice is shaking, and I can feel the tears in my eyes. Nichols looks down to the ground.

“
Pres, I really don’t know where he is. I’m sorry.”

I nod and head back outside. Where would Levi go? My first thought is Victor, but I look at my watch, and I know it’s too late. A wave of nausea hits when I wonder if he is with Sunny. Oh God, I just have this feeling that he might be there. I head over to her place and pray that I won’t find him there, doing something that I don’t even want to think about.

I pull up to her home, and I take a deep breath. I can’t believe that I’m doing this, but I need my Levi. I walk up to her door and knock. I feel lightheaded, praying Levi isn’t here.

“
Yeah?” Sunny opens the door in a very short skirt and a shirt that’s two sizes too small. “Oh, you.”

“
Is...Is Levi here?” My voice is shaky.

“
Levi? No, why?” She puts her hands on her hips and sly smile comes across her face. “Oh, did something happen in paradise?”

“
Please Sunny.” I hate that I’m begging. I’m begging Levi’s Bunny.

She sighs. “He isn’t here, I promise, and I don’t know where he is.”

Tears escape my eyes and the one thing I thought would never happen, actually happened. Sunny steps out and hugs me.

“
I know Levi and he loves you more than anything. Whatever happened, just give him some time to calm down.” She releases me and gives me a small smile. I nod and head back to my car.

I need to at least make sure he is okay. I drive back to my apartment and go inside. I begin to send him text messages. Asking where he is? Telling him I love him. Telling him that Zack and I are nothing. Over and over, I keep sending texts. I sob harder each time I hit send.  I finally crawl into bed and cry myself to sleep.

~ ~ ~

The next morning, my body aches and my head is pounding. There is still no word from Levi. There are only a few texts from Trevor and Marley. I still need to find and talk to Levi. Victor is my only option. I shower, change, and head to my car. I drive all the way out to Victor’s home. I am so hopeful that Levi is there.

“Presley, what a surprise.” Victor hugs me, but when he pulls me out of the hug, he sees my tears. “Presley?”

“
Is Levi here?”

“
Come in here.” We walk into the house, and I sit down. “He isn’t here. What’s going on?”

I’m able to tell him the whole story only breaking down one time. I tell him how I thought Zack wanted to be my friend and I didn’t want to upset Levi. I tell him that Zack kissed me, but in the end, I broke his nose. I tell him that I sent Levi text after text and there hasn’t been a response.

“I just want to make sure that he is okay.”

“
Presley, I don’t usually stick my nose in when it comes to Levi’s relationships.”

“
I’m not asking you to do that. I just want to know that he is okay. Please.”

Victor finally nods and heads over to the phone and dials his number. “Son...no, I’m fine, just checking in on you...Well, Presley is here...I know...She was just worried about you...That’s fine....I will let her know...Love you.” He hangs up and walks over to me.

“I guess he is okay?” I look down at my hands in sadness.

“
Presley, he’s a Carr and he does have a temper. Just let him cool off and he will come around.” I nod and hug Victor before I leave.

I spend the rest of my day sending Levi text after text. He never responds. The whole evening, I do the same thing, but still nothing. I try to sleep, but I toss and turn all night, and I can’t stop thinking about him. Finally, I come up with one idea to see and talk to Levi.

~ ~ ~

When the time comes, I get ready and skip my classes to head over to RU’s campus. I know Levi’s schedule by heart and know that he wouldn’t miss his classes no matter what. I sit on the bench outside the science building. I don’t know how long I sit there, until I finally see him. He looks terrible and I know that I must too.

“Levi,” I call to him, and he turns around.

He frowns but walks over to me, sitting down beside me. “I have things to do before my next class, Presley.”

I hate that he called me Presley in that tone. “It will only be a few minutes, please.”

“
Fine. Three minutes.”

“
Levi, what you saw isn’t what you think. Zack kissed me and it didn’t mean anything, I swear.”

“
Tell me something you haven’t already texted me, Presley. You’re wasting my time.”

“
Okay, I lied. I have been hanging out with Zack, but I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to be upset. He told me that he quit drinking and that we could be friends again. I’ve known him almost as long as I have known Marley. I didn’t think he was deceiving me.”

“
Is that all?”

“
Levi, please. I love you and I don’t want us to break up. Please forgive me and we can move on.” I would beg for his forgiveness for as long as I need to.

“
You know, part of me feels like I shouldn’t be mad because I lied to you before. But then again, when I lied, I wasn’t in love you. You lied after and got jealous over me running into Sunny at the library. I didn’t sneak around. So yeah, I’m still mad.”

“
Levi, please, don’t be mad. I know that I hurt you, but I’m begging you. Please forgive me. Please come home with me and we can work this all out.” I reach for his hand. I miss touching him.

“
Don’t,” he starts, not moving away, but simply looking at my hand. “Nothing you say is going to matter until I quit being pissed off. Didn’t my dad tell you to just let me cool off? You’re not exactly helping me here.”

“
Your dad told me that, but I wanted to tell you face to face. Levi, I love you and I’m so sorry.”

“
I know, Presley. Look, when I’m ready to talk to you, I’ll find ya, okay? Until then, just leave me alone.”

“
I’ll be waiting, whenever that is, I’ll be there.” I lean over and kiss his cheek. I walk to my car, without crying, and make it all the way to my apartment before the tears fall.