Northern Proposals (11 page)

"Yes. My parents paid for my college, so I came away with no student loans, and my grandfather died, giving me the down payment for the house."

"It didn't go to your parents?"

"It was Dad's dad, and he decided to pass his share directly to my sister and me if we agreed to use it wisely. He agreed buying a house was a good choice if I listened to his opinion on the house I bought.
Then my folks helped me with the things one needs after buying a house. Dad found a good, used lawnmower for me and a bunch of the other yard things I needed. I'm using my grandmother's dishes. They bought me pots and pans and knives. I had to buy a few things for the kitchen, but not that much. They gave me my old bedroom set, which I'm still using. Then mom and I went to a bunch of garage sales and I found my furniture. It's ugly, but it works. I'm still driving their old car they gave me when I went to college, and it's been remarkably reliable. So all my expenses have been low, and I've saved like crazy."

"Are you handy with tools?"

"My dad has taught me a lot for my own house. I don't hire any work he wouldn't hire."

"Jon has helped me," she told me. "There is room to expand that cabin."

I smiled. "I'd like at least one guest room, and two would be more fun. I'd like to have people come up with us. I wonder what adding on would cost."

"Less than you think," she said. "If we do it ourselves with help from your father and my brother."

"Would Jon help?"

"Absolutely."

"I can use tools, but I can only do what someone tells me to do."

"Are you afraid of heights?"

I thought about it. "Is that a non sequitur?"

"I was thinking about roofing," Jessica clarified.

"Ah. I'd be okay if the roof isn't too steep and the ladder is sturdy."

We both
lay there, looking at each other. "We could do this," she said eventually.

"We could." My tone had been wistful, but then it turned serious
. "I would want you to talk to your brother first. If he doesn't want us here, we should look somewhere else." She nodded. "And we have to resolve what's going on between us." She nodded again. "And we would need rules."

"Like what?"

"Rules for how we're going to keep it up. Rules for how we're going to use it. If we come up together, that's sort of easy, but what if you want to bring a bunch of friends without me? What if I want to let my parents use it when we're not here? What if we both come up and want to invite friends? What happens if we have a falling out? Things like that."

It was her turn to think. "I know my answers to those." I asked her what they were. "Well, I bet most of the time, we'd both want to come together." I agreed. "I bet if we talk, we can just divide the decisions for anything more complicated. One weekend I invite some of my friends. The next time we're going to have guests, you invite them. Maybe not alternate, but communicate and aim for even."

"What if one of us wants to invite friends more than the other one wants a noisy cabin?" I asked.

"Communicate and go with the more conservative decision after that?"

"All right. That works."

"For a falling out, we would either need to share it half and half," she said. "Or one of us buys the other out. We would have to go half and half until one of us could afford to buy it."

"Whoever is buying out should make payments, but it belongs to both of us until payments are complete. How do we price it? If we had a fight this year, we could just do it based on what we've put into it, but if it's five years from now, it might be worth more."

"How about we each submit a buy out bid to the other one, and whoever's bid is biggest wins?"

I offered an example. "So I could say I'd give you forty thousand for your share, and you could tell me forty-five, so you'd keep it?" She nodded. 

"What else?" she asked.

"How do we decide when to spend money on what?"

"Mutual decision. Maintenance issues always get resolved. Improvements require mutual approval or we don't do them."

We stared at each other, grinning. "We could do this," I said.

"So we just need to resolve what's going on between us."

"And you need to talk to your brother." I paused. "I don't care if Marcy hates us, but you might. I won't do this if your brother won't support us though. It won't be fun. And our entire plan is assuming your brother and my father will help us with the work we want to do."

She moved a little bit closer so we were lightly touching. I smiled. She shifted further so she was on her side facing me and began tracing patterns in my skin. I shivered and closed my eyes.

"Is this what you want?" she asked me huskily.

"Go slow."

"Are you going to make me stop?"

"No, but go slow."

She caressed my face.

"I'm not ready to announce to the whole world what we're doing," I told her.

"I'll be subtle for now. I want to stay in the sun for a while, but I want to touch you."

Her touch was electric, and I felt my heart rate increasing the more she caressed me. I was so confused about what I wanted, but she was fascinating and sexy.

And suddenly I couldn't stop thinking about the silk around my wrists.

"Are you going to use the scarves?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes."

She'd been keeping her hands above my waist, but she began caressing my bottom.

"Jessica-"

"No one is close. No one is looking at us. If I hear any boats, I'll stop."

What she was doing felt nice, and I didn't want her to stop.
I wanted more, a lot more. I opened my eyes and looked at her.

"Close them."

"This isn't enough."

"You said go slow. Close your eyes or I'll stop."

I closed my eyes.

"Jade," she said. "I am the dominant one in this relationship. Is that a problem?"

"I still don't know what that means."

"It means if I tell you to close your eyes, you close your eyes."

"If I have concerns, I am going to voice them. If I tell you to stop, I expect you to stop."

Her hand continued to caress my bottom.
She didn't say anything. I opened my eyes again.

"Close them,
Jade."

"I need you to respond to what I just told you." I continued to look at her. "I need to know you will treat me the way I want to be treated."

"Close your eyes and let me think."

"This isn't rocket science."

"Do you want me to stop what I am doing right now?"

"No. I want more."

"Close your eyes. You'll get your answers."

I closed my eyes and she continued to rub my bottom.

"I am not playing when I say I am the dominant one," she told me.

"And I told you I don't understand what that means."

She slipped her fingers inside my bikini bottom and lightly caressed my tailbone. I almost jumped three feet in the air with the intensity of the stimulation. "Oh wow."

"Do you like this?"

"Yes." I began squirming.

"Am I treating you the way you want?"

"Yes."

"Before I started this, did you know it was what you wanted?"

"No." I squirmed some more. "Oh, you can't keep doing that here."

"Oh yes, I can," she said. I could hear the smile in her voice. "You agreed I could touch you however I wanted until nine PM tonight, and this is how I want to touch you."

She continued to tease me without answering my original concerns.

"You haven't answered me," I said, but I gasped twice while saying it.

"Tell me to stop."

"I don't want you to stop."

"I know. Tell me to stop."

"Jessica, stop."

"Are you sure that's what you want?" She did something with her fingers, and it was twice as intense as what she'd been doing. "I should stop?"

"No!"

"I should stop. You told me to."

I couldn't even think straight, and she was barely touching me.

"More!"

"Not yet. You told me to go slowly, and I love going slowly."

"Oh god."

"If you ever tell me to stop, and I think you are serious, I will stop."

And then she pulled her hand out of my swimsuit and stopped touching me. My eyes snapped open. "No. Please," I told her.

"You're as worked up as I want you," she said, smiling. "If you behave though, I'll do it some more in a little bit. Or maybe find something else you like."

"Oh god," I said again.

"Jade, if you have concerns, of course I want to know about them. But stopping, well, you don't want me to stop."

"What if you were doing something I didn't like?"

"Do you trust me?"

I thought about it. It wasn't the sort of question that should have an automatic response. "I think so," I said finally. "But I don't understand you, so I don't know how you're going to behave."

"Do you think I have poor judgment?"

"No."

"Do you think I want to hurt you?"

"No."

"Do you trust me?"

I laughed. "Yes."

"If I do something you don't like, you'll tell me. But I might not stop."

"But-"

"What if I'm tickling you?"

"That doesn't count."

"Why not?"

I couldn't answer her.

"What if we're playing a game, and you cheat?"

"I wouldn't cheat," I told her.

"You snooped through my things yesterday. That was cheating." She was right, and I didn't respond. "If we were already in the sort of relationship that allowed it, I would have made you
wear the plug around the cabin, even though it's not something you would have volunteered to do. I'd be doing something to you that you didn't want me to do, even if you want a relationship with me. Is that a problem?"

I thought about it. "I don't understand, but no, it's not."

"So for now, trust me. We'll talk more as we go, but this is the nature of the relationship I want. If you don't, then we should stop now, because this isn't something I will compromise on. I know you don't understand, but trust me that I will make this more fun for you than you've ever had."

I didn't respond.

"You told me you wanted me to use the scarves. This is part of that."

"I'll trust you."

"Close your eyes."

I closed my eyes, and it took her about two minutes to have me squirming under her fingers.

I drove the boat back to the dock. When we got close, I got nervous. "Please take over," I asked.

"You need to learn," Jessica said.

"I know, but I need to see it done a few more times. It's windy now."

She nodded and we switched places. She brought us to the dock with nary a bump, but she made me tie the boat up, checking my knots when I was done. We collected all our things and walked up to the cabin.

As soon as we were inside and set our things down, she grabbed my arm and pulled me to her. She kissed me deeply, pushing me backwards until I was pressed against the wall next to the front door, her body pressed against mine.

Her tongue demanded entrance, which I joyously granted.

My heart began pounding again, and I was soon lost in the kiss, my brain shutting down completely.  I wrapped my arms around her, and even one leg, holding onto her as the kiss went on and on forever.

She broke the kiss, pulling her lips just inches from mine before growling, "Mine." Her lips enveloped mine again, pulling the breath from me and tying my emotions in knots.

I felt my heart pounding, and I knew the dampness of my bathing suit was not all lake water. I would have let her do anything she wanted to me, right then and there.

She pulled away, but I felt her breath against me, her mouth inches from mine. I fluttered my eyes open, staring into hers.

"Mine," she said again.

"Yes."

At that word, something changed in her expression, and she pulled me more tightly to her, burying her face in my neck and clutching me tightly. She kissed my neck, setting my skin on fire.

"Mine," she repeated.

"Yes, yours."

She pulled away a little and searched my face. "Do you even know what that means?"

"It means whatever you decide it means," I told her.

Her smile grew, then it grew playful. She began stroking my sides with her fingers, her fingers teasing my bare skin. It tickled, but it felt wonderful at the same time. With one hand she reached around and unlatched my leg from behind her, moving me back onto two feet, then pulled me away from the wall, her hands slipping around me to clasp my bottom. One hand slipped back inside the back of my bikini and began teasing my tailbone again.