No Escape (20 page)

Santa Monica, California

Saturday evening, March 13

“I
don’t think you’re supposed to mix wine with painkillers,” Tessa said. “I feel like I could sleep for days.”

“That was the idea,” Luke replied. He was stretched out on a soft chaise lounge on the second-floor deck that connected to his bedroom. Tessa was lying between his legs, her back to his chest, his arms wrapped around her underneath a warm blanket. Less than a block away, they could hear and smell the waves that crashed on the moonlit beach.

He’d hoped that the sound of the ocean would help Tessa relax after he’d brought her home from the hospital and prepared a dinner she could barely bring herself to eat.

Her broken wrist lay gingerly braced on a pillow across her lap. He’d had broken bones before and knew there were few things that felt worse than that deep, throbbing ache in the first few days. That’s why he hadn’t thought twice about pouring her a small glass of white wine to go along with what the doctor had prescribed.

“The hot tub finished me off.” Tessa adjusted her head
against Luke’s shoulder, feeling like she was looking down at someone else instead of experiencing this moment for herself.

“I think you fell asleep while I was cleaning your cuts afterward. I wish you could have eaten more dinner. I don’t want you to waste away.”

She laughed without humor and gestured at her rounded hip. “Not a chance.”

His hands shifted so he could squeeze her curves. “I like these just the way they are. You won’t do yourself or Ed any good by not eating. I need you to stay strong so we can work the case.”

“I’ll be okay tomorrow. This fucking case got Ed killed, you can bet I want to close it,” she said, shocking Luke with her language. He’d never heard her curse so bitterly before. “I’ll start tomorrow. I owe it to him.”

“That sounds suspiciously like guilt.”

“How else should I be feeling? You warned me this could be dangerous, and I wouldn’t listen.”

“Stop it. Even I had no idea things could go south like they did.”

“And I refused to consider that possibility,” she insisted. “For the first time in years, I felt meaningful. I was doing something important—working on a big case, complete with tragic victim, high-profile perp, and the full support of the D.A. I’d never done anything like it, and I was loving the exposure. Even though I knew Kelly was suffering.”

“I know how you were feeling before this case. Hell, it’s one of the reasons I left the sheriff’s department. You get caught up in the bullshit investigations and wonder if that’s what the rest of your life is going to be about,” Luke said. “And then you feel validated when you finally get a big case. It doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you human, Swiss.”

“Do you know what my last couple of cases involved?”

“No.”

“Well, there’s Maria Angela Sandoval, who keeps turning tricks out of her apartment to support her five kids. The super wants her evicted, but she’s got a signed lease and is very discreet with her ‘dates.’ Then there’s Ray Barber, who may have stolen his company’s software and installed it on his home PC so his kids could play interactive online games during the weekends. And let’s not forget Lester Delillo—he has a frozen potato launcher that he uses after midnight to take out his neighbor’s garden gnomes.”

“The famous spud gun.” Luke laughed unwillingly. “I did my turn as a street deputy, so I know what most of the daily calls are like. I’ll admit I never thought about what happened once the police reports were filed, though.”

“The cases get dumped on some junior prosecutor like me,” Tessa said. “I would find myself researching the replacement value of garden gnomes so I’d know what to charge Lester with—and asking myself if this was why I’d gone to law school. But that changed the morning I met Kelly.”

“Because the case was important.”

“It had a direct effect on someone’s life. And suddenly, my own life had purpose again. I just didn’t realize the price other people would have to pay for me to feel good about my job. First Kelly, then Ed—” Her voice broke.

“Dammit, Tessa. That’s not what happened. If you want to get angry, if you want to blame someone, then save it up for the guy who carried out this hit.”

“Believe me, I’ve got plenty left over for him.”

Luke gently turned her to face him on the chaise, mindful of her wrist. “After knowing Ed Flynn for eight years, I’m going to take the liberty of speaking for him.”

“He respected you,” Tessa said.

“By all accounts, he loved you and thought you walked on water. Both as a person and a prosecutor. He was one of the best cops I’ve ever known, and I’d trust his judgment about you implicitly.”

“Even if you weren’t sleeping with me?” Tessa asked.

“You bet. Do you believe that Ed dedicated his life to protecting others? That in the years since his wife died he was essentially married to the job?”

“Yes,” Tessa said softly. “Ronnie and I kept trying to fix him up on blind dates, but after a while saw there was no use. He gave everything he had to the job. And to helping me and Ronnie learn the ropes.”

“Ed died a cop, protecting a friend he cared for very much,” Luke continued. “If I’d been there, I would have done the same thing.”

Tessa shook her head vehemently as she blinked back tears.

“Yes,” Luke said, giving her a small shake before wrapping her in his arms. “Ed left this world saying the name of the woman he loved, doing a job that made him whole. It just doesn’t get any better than that, Tessa.”

She continued to shake her head. “I didn’t want him to die for me.”

“He chose to make that sacrifice, baby. And now it’s your job to make sure it wasn’t in vain.”

“No one is worth another’s life,” Tessa said.

“It’s what he wanted.”

“I want him alive. I want him to be here.”

“I know you do. But he’s gone, Swiss. We need to carry on his work for him. What drove him on this case?”

“He wanted to help Kelly. Because it was what I wanted.”

Luke could barely understand her through the tears he’d deliberately provoked. He didn’t think it was healthy to keep everything bottled up, but hadn’t been prepared for the depth of Tessa’s pain. Remembering the doctor’s advice about work and getting her life back to normal, Luke said the first thing that came to his mind.

“If that’s what Ed wanted, then that’s what we’ll do. In his name. But not tonight, okay? Tonight we cry and raise a glass to a good man.”

Tessa nodded, her throat too tight to speak. She had the crying part down just fine, and couldn’t seem to stop now that she’d started. She felt Luke’s arms strong and warm around her, and was ashamed for the way she was leaning on him.

Normally, she didn’t depend on anyone, but it had been the worst day of her entire life. Even the day she’d lost her mother hadn’t hurt this badly, because she’d been too young to understand what it all meant. But now she did, and she didn’t have the strength to pull away from Luke.

“Just cry it out, baby.” He seemed to be reading her mind. “Ed wouldn’t mind at all. It shows that you loved him, that he had an impact on your life. He had an impact on everyone who met him,” Luke’s voice was gravelly because of the lump in his own throat. “If I could be half as good a man as Ed was, I’d be happy.”

She looked at Luke and saw his hazel eyes shimmer with moisture. Reaching to wipe away the wetness on his cheek, she felt the dam inside her bursting.

Without another word, Tessa buried her head in Luke’s neck and wept.

Santa Monica, California

Sunday morning, March 14

T
essa woke up at nine on Sunday morning, disturbed when Luke left the bed. She rolled to her back and winced at the pain in her wrist. Before she could do more than open her eyes, Luke was bending over her, shifting a pillow so that she could rest the cast on it.

“Don’t get up. I’ll get you a snack and some painkillers. Let me get the door first, though. Some jerk has been banging on it for the last two minutes.”

She watched in a daze as he paused to pull sweatpants over his boxers, then finger-combed his hair. When the pounding on the door started again, Luke cursed and left the room.

Tessa gingerly piled another pillow behind her back and looked around. She vaguely remembered coming in from the porch late last night after crying all over Luke. He’d helped her wash her face and brush her teeth—he’d even opened the toothpaste and applied it for her, something that would have been difficult to do with her wrist so sore that moving her fingers caused sharp pain.

Then he’d tucked her into bed, sliding in beside her to warm the sheets and hold her close. And when she’d drifted off, only to jerk awake with a cry of protest on her lips, he’d understood the demons haunting her. So he’d turned a light on and talked to her into the night, telling funny stories about his experiences on various task forces and stakeouts. She’d fallen asleep curled against Luke’s side in the middle of one of those tales.

In all, Luke Novak had taken better care of her than anyone had. Ever. And for some reason, it felt like pity was the last thing motivating his actions. But she really wasn’t ready to deal with how she felt about that. It was too much, too soon.

For now, she had to think about finding Kelly and building a case against the man who had killed Ed. She hoped Luke would understand that she simply didn’t have anything else to give until those tasks were done.

“Someone’s here to see you,” Luke said from the doorway, surprising her out of her thoughts. She saw his eyes linger on her tousled hair and bare shoulder where his oversized sheriff’s department T-shirt gaped off her.

Then she sat straight up in bed as she saw her father move into the doorway behind Luke. Her eyes were still gritty from last night’s tears, but they weren’t deceiving her.

“What the hell? You’re supposed to be in Argentina,” Tessa told him.

“I made arrangements to come back as soon as Luke called me yesterday. Are you all right?” Paul looked at the raw scrapes on her face, the visible bruising on her cheek and jaw, and the pristine cast on her left forearm.

Tessa shifted under her father’s silent regard and resisted the urge to adjust the neckline of the T-shirt she was wearing. She probably looked like crap.

“He wouldn’t wait for you to come downstairs,” Luke said, stepping into the room and sitting on the bed next to Tessa.

He handed her a breakfast bar and put a glass of water on the nightstand, then leaned against the headboard to get comfortable. It was clear Paul was pissed beyond words at finding Tessa in bed with a half-dressed man, but Luke figured it was no less than the guy deserved for barging in unannounced on a Sunday morning.

Paul let the silence stretch, wondering who would cave in and break it first. But except for the sound of a wrapper crinkling as Tessa consumed the granola bar, no one seemed willing to break the uncomfortable quiet. In fact, his daughter tried very hard to act like sitting on a bed with a bare-chested man sprawled next to her was nothing new. But as Paul looked at the casual strength of Luke Novak—whose scarred abdomen and careless pose gave him the appearance of a warrior after battle—he realized that nothing about the scene was normal for his daughter.

He’d never liked the men she’d dated previously, because they were, quite frankly, pussies. Nothing about Luke gave that impression, so he had to hope his daughter’s taste in men was improving.

With a sigh, he entered the room and threw his coat down on an end table. Then he took a seat in an overstuffed chair meant for reading or getting cozy in front of the fireplace on a winter night.

Sliding his daughter and her lover a glance, he wasn’t sure if he was ready to go there just yet.

“You flew all the way up here to see me?” Tessa finally asked. Her curiosity got the better of her determination not to be the first to give in.

Paul Jacobi gave a sigh. “Things between us must really be in the toilet if you have to ask me that. Of course I came to make sure you were okay. I have to admit, I hadn’t considered that you might have someone to, ah, take care of you.”

Luke smiled complacently and handed Tessa a painkiller and the glass of water off the bedside table. She counted to
ten in irritation while she took the pill and swallowed. She didn’t want to start fighting with her father—frankly, it took too much energy. But he did know how to push her buttons.

Besides, nothing had happened with Luke last night—at least nothing along the lines of what her father was thinking. But she’d bite through her tongue before giving him the satisfaction of watching her defend herself.

Seeing his daughter’s shoulders tense and face go expressionless, Paul could have kicked himself. Here she was, bruised and battered, and he fell right back into their old pattern of bickering. He knew how close she had been to Ed Flynn—had, in fact, been jealous of their easy relationship. He shouldn’t let those feelings color his behavior now that the man was gone.

“I’m sorry about Detective Flynn. I know how much he meant to you.”

“Thank you,” Tessa mumbled in surprise, and took another bite of the granola bar.

“I didn’t realize how dangerous this case might become. I don’t think anyone did,” Paul said, holding a hand up to stop her when she would have defended herself against some imagined criticism.

“We won’t underestimate the players again,” Luke said.

“I want you to come back to Buenos Aires with me,” Paul said abruptly to Tessa. “Come on the cruise to Antarctica. Let Luke and his company follow up on the investigation and leave tracking Ed Flynn’s killer to his fellow cops.”

“I appreciate the offer,” Tessa said. “But I can’t run away from this, no matter how tempting it might be to consider. I owe it to a lot of people to see this case through to trial.”

“Your friend and mentor was killed trying to do just that. Doesn’t this tell you how serious the people you’re investigating are about not being caught?” Paul asked.

“Yes. And it only emphasizes the need to stop them. I couldn’t live with myself if I let someone else do my job in this situation.”

“You’re too personally involved to be objective—” Paul began angrily.

“You’re right, it is personal. And because of that, I’m going to be like a dog with a freaking bone. I’m not going to let go until these guys are in prison, preferably on death row.”

“You’re going to work in your condition?” her father asked, pointing to the cast on her arm.

Luke jumped in to defuse the simmering tension. “You never know when a cast will come in handy—that thing’s heavy, believe me. She could use it as a weapon if she had to. Besides, her wrist is the only thing that’s broken. Her brain works just fine.”

Paul checked his watch and got to his feet. “Dammit, I don’t have time to argue. If I don’t catch the noon flight, I’ll miss the boat in Argentina. I haven’t made other arrangements to look out for Kevin and Lana.”

“So go. I want you to. These people made a threat against Kevin. However improbable it is, you should be there with him to make sure nothing happens,” Tessa said with a sigh.

A throbbing pain in her head began to rival the one in her broken wrist, and she could have sworn that each of the shallow abrasions on her face and arms was suddenly a gaping wound. Something about arguing with her father took the energy and will right out of her.

Paul watched her shut down. Jet lag and worry got the better of him, finally causing him to lose his temper with his daughter’s stubbornness. “Why can’t you be reasonable? Are you trying to punish me?”

“I’ll be perfectly safe,” she insisted, ignoring the bait. “That’s what you’re paying Luke for, remember?”

“Yeah, well from where I’m standing it looks like he’s doing a piss-poor job,” Paul said coldly.

Tessa jumped out of bed with a gasp of outrage. “How
dare
you? Luke’s taken better care of me than anyone I’ve known.
Anyone
. So go back to your family, Paul. You’ve got
no right to play the heavy-handed parent at this point in my life.”

“You don’t have to defend me, Swiss.” Luke got up and put a hand on her shoulder to restrain her, but she shook him off.

She was too angry to care about the pain that movement cause, and instead focused on her father. “Why do you look so shocked? You weren’t there when I needed you as a child, so don’t act surprised if I don’t need you at all anymore.”

“Are you saying that Luke is going to be there for you in the future?” Paul asked calmly, not revealing the pain he felt at her statements. “After all, you haven’t known him long. You’re willing to let him come between you and your family?”

Tessa lost whatever fragile hold she’d had on her tongue. “How well did you know Lana before you married her and banished your only child to a boarding school in another state?”

Luke winced at Tessa’s direct hit. He knew she had no idea how deeply that accusation would wound Paul, or she wouldn’t have said it.

She wasn’t a cruel person, but her heart was breaking over Ed. She was ready to lash out at the first person who asked for it, and Paul had provoked her to the point that he became a target.

“How long have you been waiting to throw that in my face, Tessa? Did it feel good to get it off your chest?” Paul asked wearily.

“Don’t turn this around on me—” Tessa began.

“Fine. I did a terrible thing when I married a woman I had fallen in love with at a time when I was afraid I’d be spending the rest of my life alone.” Paul held up his hands in mock surrender.

“That wasn’t what I was talking about. I’m not such a bitch that I would begrudge you happiness. I just don’t think it should have come at the expense of mine.” Her stormy blue-gray gaze met Paul’s directly.

“So I was a bad father. Sue me, Counselor. But Lana is a good woman. However badly things began between you two, as my wife she deserves your respect. You have no right to hate her for something I did twenty-five years ago.”

“How about I hate you instead?” Tessa spoke in a half whisper, faintly shocked at the depths of her own emotions. But she was helpless to stop the words from coming out—it was as if a dam had broken, and she couldn’t hold back the flow.

Luke held his breath, wondering if he should step between them and stop the conflict. But he knew that the only way to get over the pain of the past was to deal with it and move on. Paul and Tessa had probably never openly discussed their estrangement before, and hopefully this could be a way to begin healing the breach.

If they didn’t rip each other to shreds with their words first.

Paul had his eyes closed as he tried to focus on why he was there in the first place. However, the prospect of finally having things out with his distant, elusive daughter was too tempting to give up. He knew she was hurting—both emotionally and physically—and it was wrong of him to add to her burden.

But this was the first honest emotion she’d shown toward him in decades, and he wasn’t going to back off now.

“Listen to me, Tessa. What I did to you was wrong. I didn’t realize it then, though, because I’d just lost your mother and was hurting so badly. I was just a shell of a man, and I let you down so completely that sometimes I still have trouble looking at myself in the mirror.”

Tessa took a half step backward, running into Luke’s solid warmth. She’d never actually heard her father admit that he’d done anything wrong. Instead, he’d always gotten defensive and protective of Lana, which had served to drive Tessa even further away.

Paul sat down again, the energy his anger had given him
completely gone. In its place was a weary resolve, and the knowledge that if he didn’t make some effort to fix things he was going to go to his grave without his daughter ever forgiving him.

“Why the surprise?” Paul asked, correctly interpreting Tessa’s silence. “I know what I did was unforgivable. It was wrong to send you away, and even more wrong to let you step in and do my job with Kevin once he was born. I only hurt you worse when I realized what I had given up and tried to be a father to both of you again. I wasn’t prepared for the possibility that you two might not need me, so I panicked and forced the issue.”

“You were trying to do what was right for Kevin,” Tessa said hesitantly. She’d never seen her father look so old and tired. Every one of his six-plus decades was etched on his face.

“Believe it or not, I was thinking of you. I wanted you to get out and meet people, to have a normal college life, maybe find a husband. Not be tied to your five-year-old brother because Lana and I were too wrapped up in our jobs to be real parents.”

“I don’t know what to say to that,” Tessa admitted. She felt Luke’s hand settle on her shoulder again, this time offering comfort.

“Why don’t you say you’ll give me another chance?” Paul asked wistfully. “I’ve wanted to make it up to you for a long time. But you’ve been so angry. I’d hoped you would get past it, once you moved out to LA, and we could start interacting as adults. But it hasn’t happened, and neither one of us is getting any younger.”

“I had no idea.”

“Because you haven’t wanted to see it. The ability to be willfully blind to the truth is something you no doubt get from me,” Paul said.

Tessa’s chin shot up in an automatic rejection of being
like her father in any way. He recognized the gesture and shook his head.

“Isn’t it time to stop looking behind us? I want to look forward to something for once, instead of focusing on the past. I know I set you aside as a child, and if I could take it back, I would. But you have my love and attention now. It’s all I can do. Is it enough?” Paul asked.