New Title 1 (33 page)

No More Drama...For Now.

The smell of bacon frying awoke Jordin out of her deep and comfortable sleep. She opened her eyes slowly and it seemed as if a blinding light greeted her. Brightness was all around her and it took her a second to remember where she was.

White walls, white sheets, white drapes, and white blinds. Fluffy white pillows all surrounding her body. Yup, she was home.

“
Jordin, breakfast!”

The sound of her mother's voice caused her to smile slightly, having not heard it in so long. This was her first time returning home to Cherry Hill, New Jersey since she'd been with Slim. After her parents watched their 'destined for greatness' baby girl throw her life away for a low level convict drug dealer, they did everything but legally disown her. But when she needed to get away for a while after the whole ordeal that had happened with Noelle and Slim...and Julez, this was the only place that she could think of.

“
Ma, it'll be a cold day in hell when you don't make bacon for breakfast, huh?” Jordin asked finally making her way to her mother's newly renovated kitchen as she tied her pale blue terry cloth robe. “These thighs never stood a chance since grade school,” she added with a chuckle.

“
Please watch your language Jordin,” her mother scolded in her school teacher voice. “And there is nothing wrong with bacon. You grew up on it. Me and your father have been eating it our whole lives. We're perfectly fine.”

Jordin wanted to add that if high blood pressure and a recent heart attack scare on her father's part was perfectly fine, then they were right. But she decided she'd best keep her mouth shut being that her mother seemed to be in her holier than thou morning phase.

Her mother, Viola, began setting out white china plates while humming a church hymn and Jordin could hear her father's pick up pulling into the driveway, just getting in from his morning crack of dawn fishing. He never missed it, every Saturday.

“
Hey daddy,” she greeted eagerly, five year old little girl style.

“
Heyyy sugar pie!” Leroy was so happy to have his baby girl home.

Viola scooped a spatula full of scrambled eggs onto Jordin's plate, figuring now was as good a time as any to say it.

“
So have you decided what you're going to do?”

Jordin's happy demeanor faded as she took a deep sigh.

“
Viola...” Leroy started but she countered back.

“
I'm sorry Leroy, but it must be talked about. Jordin baby we love you, but you've been holed up here going on a full month and you've got to get it together and make some big girl decisions, now. You've got a job waiting on you-”

“
Mama, I know that!” Jordin spat back. “It's just...I mean...” Jordin shook her head and then continued. “I've been through something ma. You don't know what it feels like!” Jordin's face began to grow hot and her nose started to itch as the tears began to form. “Every time I think about what they
did
to me... I just needed to get away.”

Leroy remained silent and Viola looked on at her only child with sadness in her eyes, wishing she could save Jordin from her pain. Ever since Jordin was a young girl she had been a people pleaser, always searching for love, always naïve to the cruelty of the world. She wanted to think there was good in all people, and Viola felt like she hadn't done a good job at preparing her for the coldness and evil things that people would bring her way. She was sorry for that.

“
Baby, I know they hurt you. I know it was probably the... worst feeling you have ever felt...but you gotta let that go, Jordin. Life goes on baby, and it's gonna go with or without you.”

Jordin stared down at her plate and took a small bite of her bacon as a tear rolled to the tip of her nose. She wiped it away and shook her head.

“
I'm going back soon. The deadline for my next story is coming up... so I'm going back to turn it in... Happy now?”

Viola sighed and shook her head as well.

“
Jordin, I am happy if you are happy. And like I told you, if you need us to help you find a place, we will. If you want to stay here and commute, or see if you can work from home, that's fine too. But for goodness sake, make a decision. Don't just lock yourself off from the world.”

Jordin looked at her mother like she was crazy.

“
I don't lock myself off, what are you talking about? My job knows that I'm here, they know I'm writing. I just told you I'm going back to turn in-”

“
What about that guy?” Viola asked sharply. Jordin stared at her mother for a few long seconds and Leroy took that as his cue to excuse himself seeing as this was going into woman talk territory.

When her father was well out of ear shot, out of the kitchen and into the living room Jordin responded.

“
He doesn't even call anymore... why are you bringing him up?”

Viola sighed.

“
Jordin, I'm bringing him up because he was calling you almost every day, worried about you, leaving you messages. You slept with him before you came down here and then you just disappeared and shunned him, what did he do to you? You're taking this thing out on the wrong people, baby.”

Jordin dropped her jaw truly infuriated. How dare her mother!

“
You listened to my messages? What is wrong with you? Oh my god, that is none of your business!” Jordin was in a state of disbelief.

Viola plead with her eyes.

“
Baby, I am sorry. I was only worried about you...” She swallowed hard, and stared into her daughter's clear beautiful face. “Jordin I don't want you to miss out on life because of what has happened. That man sounds like he really cares about you.”

Jordin shook her head like her mother was being ridiculous. She thought her mother was really stupid.

“
That
man
is Noelle's husband, ma! And trust me, he was worried because that's the type of person he is. It's not...it's not like that! He's...he's...I'm...I'm not the kind of woman he would care about, trust me. It was just...sex.” Jordin was crying now.

It hurt Viola's heart to hear her daughter talk like this. It wasn't just this incident. No, this was years in the making. Years of Slim, and Noelle, and life just beating Jordin up, making her feel like she wasn't quite good enough, and this incident had pushed her self esteem right off the edge and had sent it plummeting to an all time low. Now Viola understood, and it hurt her more than anything.

“
Jordin,” she called with a shaky voice filled with pain and love simultaneously. “Baby, do you realize how
beautiful
you are? Why do you think this man wouldn't see that in you? Jordin... don't let them do that to you, baby. Don't let them destroy you. And don't deny yourself happiness because you think someone is too good for you. There is no one that is too good for you.”

Jordin heard her mother but she wasn't listening. Stevie Wonder could see that Julez was too good for her, she just felt like she wasn't even in his league. Her mind wouldn't allow her to believe that she would ever be enough for him. She figured even if she did allow herself to try something with him, eventually he would be gone, and she wasn't up for being hurt again.

“
Ma, it's over,” she reiterated more sternly. “He doesn't even call anymore. It's over.” She took a sip of her orange juice and took a deep breath. “As far as me...don't worry. I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna go back to work, and I'm going to start looking for an apartment today...alright?”

Jordin's voice pleaded with her mother to just accept her answers, label them good enough, and let her be. Her mother nodded, knowing her daughter all to well, taking what she got in stride.
“Alright,” she answered.

And then they finished their breakfast.

***

Julez jogged across the busy New York street dodging large raindrops as the afternoon shower began to coat the Manhattan city. The smell of rain mixed with the smell of the city was indescribable.

He reached his Range Rover and hastily slid inside, passing the damp brown paper bag of food to Kira.

“
Mmm smells good,” she said, licking her juicy lips while resting it on her short skirt covered lap.

“
I'm telling you. Sofritos is where it's at. Wait til' you taste the paella, you gonna be feigning for that shit.” Julez chuckled and Kira did the same, but in reality, she was feigning for something else. For the past weeks, Julez had been in down moods, getting over the ordeal with Noelle and from what Kira learned from spying and overhearing him leave voicemails, getting over Jordin as well. He finally seemed to be getting back to his old self, and ever since they had left a board meeting in midtown and he suggested picking up some food along the way, Kira could only think about fucking his sexy ass brains out.

“
Well, I know it's hot,” she added. “Do I get worker's comp for third degree burns on my thighs from the boss' food?”

The statement unthinkingly led Julez to glance at her thighs and then he faced back forward.

“
Nah, that's on you. If you followed dress code your skirts would come to your knees,” he mocked. Kira rolled her eyes playfully.

“
Whatever Julez.” She studied him as he began pulling out of the parking space. The way his crisp shirt and slacks fit his strong frame. The way he drove with one hand on the steering wheel, the other propped on the console exposing his diamond bezel watch. The way he smelled so fresh, the sharpness of his facial hair like he'd always just come from the barber, his smooth waves, his perfect lips, deep eyes that always looked like they were thinking of the next world taking master plan, his perfect teeth when he smiled, his deep voice when he spoke, it was hard for her to find anything wrong with him.

“
You're perfect.”

“
What?” Julez asked with a chuckle. He had heard her but he wondered what the hell she was talking about and where it was coming from. They had just been talking about Sofritos and now she was whispering shit. Kira was embarrassed. She hadn't meant to say that. But now that she had, she didn't back down.

“
You heard me. But since you wanna hear it again, with your cocky ass...then I'll say it. Julez, you're perfect.”

Julez laughed uneasily as she just stared at him, and then he became serious.
How do you respond to that?

“
Yo you... you shot out, ma.”

Kira just continued to stare and then she reached down and placed the bag of food on the floor.

Julez was a bit on edge wondering what would occur, Kira was so unpredictable but he kept his cool face on. He continued to drive and focus on the road, but when she brushed her fingers across his face, he moved his head slightly.

“
C'mon Kira, cool out. We already talked about this.”

She continued to stare at him and then she did it again, paying him no mind. He had the kind of face that you just had to touch. He moved his head again.

“
What the fuck?”

“
You need to relax,” she told him.

“
I am relaxed,” he shot back. “I was chilling 'til you started getting' on this weird shit.”

“
It's not weird shit,' she countered but Julez only shook his head in defiance and continued driving.

“
It's pure, red blooded sexual attraction, that's it.” Julez sighed and kept cool as she spoke but his heart rate was speeding up. He hadn't had sex since Jordin. He'd jerked off a few times and was just recently contemplating calling up some old flings to warm his sheets, but no physical contact yet.