Neck Deep In Vampires (A BBW Urban Fantasy) (2 page)

             
He sniffed at half a tuna sandwich that Camille had left there before she’d headed out to the beach. I’d meant to throw it away, but I’d been too busy wallowing in self pity.

“Mind if I have some?” he asked, and star
ted eating it before I could answer, attacking it as if it were his last meal.

“Help yourself. Your table manners are terrible,
by the way,” I informed him, frowning with disapproval.  He was scattering pieces of tuna and bread all over the table.

“So
I’ve heard.” There were crumbs clinging to his whiskers; he licked them off. “All right, here’s the problem.  My friends are disappearing. The other familiars at Bay Breeze.  Half a dozen of them have gone missing, but they’re not dead.” He never stopped eating, but I could still hear his voice in my head as he chowed down. Well, that was a handy skill.

“I’m sorry to hear that.  How do you know they’re not dead
?”

He was almost done with the sandwich. 
“There’s a psychic connection between them and the witches they serve. The witches would know if they’re dead, but they’re saying that they can still sense their life force. They should be able to find them, but it’s like their energy is muffled or something. Got any more?”

“
Got any more what?”

“
Any more food. What else would I be talking about?” He turned to stare at me as if I was stupid.

“I’ll look in the refrigerator. You were saying? Your missing friends
– why would you need me? Aren’t the witches looking for them?”

I yanked open the refrigerator door and pulled out a can of tuna
, peeled the top off, and dumped it on the empty plate for him.

He shrugged his fuzzy
shoulders, and then dove into the pile of tuna.  “They’re trying, but they’re running into dead ends. More and more familiars go missing, a new one every week or so, and nobody can figure out why.”

“How do you figure I can help? God, you eat fast. Slow down, I don’t know the proper way to Heimlich a cat.”

He made a rude raspberry noise, while wolfing down the tuna. “I’ve been feeding myself since I was a kitten; I think I know how to eat.  Ahh, that was some good stuff. You got any more?”

“No, and you know, you’re kind of obnoxious.”

“Yeah, yeah. That’s what my last witch said. She booted me out. So, I’m kind of seeking employment, by the way. You need a familiar?” He looked up at me hopefully.

“Not that I know of.
  I’ve never heard of a vampire with a familiar.”  I sat down on the couch, and he jumped on the couch and sat down next to me. Without thinking, I reached over and scratched him behind the ears, and he started purring.

“Too bad.
You’ve got talented hands.” He winked at me. I was being winked at by a cat, and in a fairly lascivious fashion, I’d say.

For the millionth time, I marveled at how weird my life had gotten since I’d been
Turned.

“
So here’s what I think,” Barney said. “One of the witches has got to be behind this. Only a witch could lure away a familiar like that. It’s got to be some powerful juju.  Maybe the High Priestess is behind it; maybe that’s why the investigation isn’t going anywhere.  Now, I heard the witches talking about you.  You have the power to Compel, they said. And you can read minds.”

“My reputation precedes me.”

“So does mine, unfortunately. That’s why nobody will hire me.” He made a sad face.

I shot him a disapproving look.
“Let me guess, your reputation is that you’re rude, pushy, demanding, and a little bit of a perv?”

He perked up, and winked at me. “You got it, babe. Except there’s no ‘little’ about it. You know what I mean?”

“I’m pretending I don’t.”

“So, here’s what you need to do.  Go back to Bay Breeze, compel all the witches, even the High Priestess, make them talk. Read their minds. See who’s taking my friends.”

I held up my hands in protest.
“Whoa, whoa. I don’t just run around compelling people and reading minds willy nilly.”

“Willy
nilly? Who says that?” Now I was being mocked by a cat.

“If you want my help, you’ll stop being an insulting little hairball,” I said
irritably.

“If you went out there, wouldn’t you just know who’s doing it?” he insisted. “You could just hear everyone’s thoughts, right?”

“If I could hear everyone’s thoughts all the time, I’d go crazy. I have to concentrate, make a conscious effort to get into people’s heads. And I only do it if it’s a life or death emergency; it’s a horrible invasion of privacy.”

“So you won’t help?” He looked deflated.

Damn cat. It’s way too easy to make me feel guilty. “I will go back to Bay Breeze, and I will talk to the High Priestess and I will offer her my help. If she takes me up on it, than I’m willing to investigate. That’s all I can promise for right now.”

He
didn’t look pleased.  “Good luck with that,” he grumbled. “She’s not going to tell you a thing. She’s trying to sweep everything under the rug. New to the job, doesn’t want everyone to think she’s incompetent. Are you going to do the same thing? We’re not human, so if we disappear it doesn’t even matter?”

“
Do not get your fur in a bunch.  I will do my absolute best to help find your friends,” I said.

I meant it. Why not? It would keep my mind of Nicholas, and my desperate craving for sex,
and  the fact that I was going to be assassinating a monster in three weeks. Also I’m a sucker for animals. Even smartass talking animals.

“I guess that’s better than noth
ing,” Barney muttered. He didn’t look particularly convinced.

“
Run along then.” I made a shooing motion at him. “You can check back with me tomorrow after sunset.”

“Fine, fine.
I can tell when I’m not wanted.” But he didn’t budge from where he’d curled up on the table.

“Can you?” I raised a skeptical
eyebrow.

“
Hmpph. There’s a sweet little Persian across town who actually does like my company,” he said, in a slightly huffy tone. “I guess I’ll be going.”

He loped across the room and leaped up to the window sill, where he paused and looked back at me. “I don’t suppose you’d consider leaving the window open?” he said, s
uddenly sounding a little sad.  “My old mistress locks all her windows now. I kind of got used to sleeping indoors when I was there. It rains a lot this time of year.”

“Fine,” I sighed. “What’s the worst that could happen? An obnoxious talking cat could get in?”

He let out a little rumbling growl of disgust.  With a flick of his tail, he leaped out of the window and landed on the branch of a magnolia tree, leaving me alone again.

             
How was Peyton getting along at the bar? I wondered. She was probably having a grand old time. She always made friends; she just had that kind of energy.

I leaned back on the couch, closed my eyes, and let my mind wander.

I wanted to check on Andreas, but I didn’t have the stomach to read his mind again, because odds were he’d be doing something truly evil to somebody, and there would be nothing I could do about it.

Andreas was
Simon’s brother, a being of vast wealth and power, and an unspeakable lust to torture, maim and kill. He could read minds, and his physical strength was unbelievable. 

His brothers had
vowed to their mother, on her deathbed, that they would never kill Andreas. She’d had to make them promise, because he was such a bastard even back then, even in the 1400s. They’d never break that vow, unless he directly attacked them. They were also obligated to defend him if anyone tried to kill him.

He was nearly untouchable – but if anyone could kill him, it was me.

Most vampires inherit their powers from their Sires. I’d been turned by a psychopath who’d been a lab experiment – and as a result, I’d been gifted with numerous powers which I could use to bring Andreas down.

Everyone from the house of Simon could
Compel people to do everything, including to forget that they’d been Compelled. They could also set things on fire by concentrating on them.

Everyone from the house of Joseph could levitate objects, and could enter people’s dreams.

Everyone from the house of Andreas could read people’s minds, and could make people’s hearts stop.

I had all those powers, and therefore, I could make Andreas’ heart stop. Unfortunately for that particular power, I had to be physically in close proximity.

At the moment, he was holed up in his home in France, a vast stone fortress I’d never be able to breach.  In three weeks, he had an important business meeting in Georgia.

That was the real reason I’
d gone to Florida. I was four hours drive from where he’d be staying.  I could sneak out, drive to Georgia, kill him, and be back in my condo before the sun rose. I would compel my Thralls to forget that I’d been out all night, and nobody would ever know.  That was the plan, anyway. It was the best chance that I had.

I couldn’t risk dragging Nicholas
down with me. If anyone ever discovered I was behind Andreas’ assassination, the repercussions would be terrible, not just for me but for Nicholas, as long as I was considered his Eternal Consort.

That was why I’d compelled him to break up with me, and then compelled him to forget that he’d done it.
  I needed to get as much distance between us as possible, in every way.

I sighed heavily, feeling as if there were a granite rock in my chest.

Footsteps thumped up the stairs, disturbing my reverie.  The door swung open, and Peyton stumbled in. “You shoulda come,” she slurred. “It wash awshome! Hot guysh everywhere. I’ve got a lunch date for tomorrow. He’sh hot!” She paused, swaying where she stood, frowning in concentration. “I think.”

I
stood up. “Change of plans,” I said.

             
I was going to skip feeding on Peyton and feed on Camille instead, because I thought it would be best to be sober when I went to meet up with the witches, but Peyton sulked and pouted and went on about how she’d gone to all that trouble to slam six margaritas in rapid succession.  Trouble – hah. She got drunk, she flirted with hot guys – but whatever, I fed on her anyway. I’d be sober again by the time I got to Bay Breeze; my vampire metabolism would make sure of that.

             
It wasn’t a surprise, really, that Peyton wanted me to feed on her – feeding is an orgasmic experience for Thralls, and it’s very pleasurable for vampires as well.

One of the advantages of being a vampire is that
the blood we drink tastes like whatever the Thrall has most recently consumed, so that kind of made up for never being able to eat solid food again.

             
I was known to ply my Thralls with a buttload of chocolate.

             
We were about to head out to Bay Breeze, but Peyton announced that she was deathly afraid of witches, which I thought was a bit ridiculous. She was a Thrall, which meant she’d been raised with vampires.  She’d grown up as the snack and servant of creatures who can read minds and compel others to their will, but witches freaked her out?

             
I told Peyton she could stay home and sober up while I was out, and I also told her that I was leaving the window open in a case a stray cat came back to visit me. I left before she had a chance to ask me any more questions.

             
Camille drove me, as my mild buzz faded away and sharp sobriety needled me. Camille was a pale, studious looking girl with big round glasses and straight, shiny brown hair.  She was nerdy and serious, in contrast to Peyton’s constant bubbliness.

             
She was also very observant.

             
“You’re glancing in the rearview mirror an awful lot,” she said. “Looking for anything in particular?”

             
“For the past few nights, I’ve had this odd feeling that I’m being watched, but I can never spot anyone.” I watched the cars behind me. None of them seemed to be tailing us. 

             
Her forehead wrinkled in concern. “Is there any reason that anybody would follow you?”

             
“Not that I know of. Do you have a stalker ex boyfriend, by any chance? Because I sure as heck know that Nicholas isn’t here following me.” For one thing, I’d sense it.  Eternal Consorts are like that, they can sense each other’s energy.

             
“No stalker exes.” She shook her head. “You don’t have any enemies that you know of, do you? Maybe it’s just your imagination?”

             
“Maybe.” I didn’t think so. Unfortunately, for me to read someone’s mind, I have to meet the person first, so I couldn’t read the mind of whoever might or might not be following me. I had never laid eyes on them – assuming there even was anyone following me.