Nathan’s Montana Bride (Sweet Historical Mail Order Bride Romance) (Montana Ranchers Brides series) (6 page)

Abby nodded. "Mmm..."

When she looked closely into his eyes, Abby caught a flash of something she hadn't seen before in Nathan.

Was that uncertainty?

Nathan turned and looked up at the stars. "I love coming out here at night, and just looking up. The sky out here in Montana is amazing at night."

Abby didn't follow his gaze. She was suddenly sure that Nathan was trying to hide something from her. Perhaps it was a momentary doubt. But, she was sure that something had changed between the moment he had kissed her and now.

"Did you like to be here, under the stars, with Lucy?"

She saw his shoulders tense. Well done, Abby! Just put your foot in it, and at such a delicate time, she thought.

Nathan nodded. "She loved it here too. Montana was her favorite place in the world."

Abby placed a hand on Nathan's shoulder. He turned and smiled at her. He stroked the side of her cheek and there was a genuine warmth in his eyes. But Abby saw a sadness there too.
 

Abby pulled herself closer to him. "You're not feeling cold, are you?" he asked.

"No. I just want to hug you. Is that a crime?"

Nathan smiled. "Not at all." He squeezed her tighter. "It feels good."

Abby leaned her head against his chest. The rough material of his shirt felt good against her skin. She was sure she could hear his heart beating. Maybe it was her own, she thought suddenly.

Nathan kissed her on the top of her head. Abby still had the sense that he had somehow become withdrawn, preoccupied. Perhaps he was thinking of his wedding night with Lucy. Abby was certain that at least some thoughts of Lucy must be on his mind, right now.
 

Was Abby competing for Nathan's attention? She frowned, uncertain what to do. How could she make him understand that she wanted him? She hoped their wedding night wasn't going to affected by whatever thoughts were coursing through Nathan's mind.

Nathan had fallen into a long, deep silence. Gone was the charming, jovial rancher, only concerned with his new wife. It had been replaced by someone who had suddenly become distant.
 

Abby felt a stab of unease. What could she do?

"I'd like to go inside now, Nathan," she said quietly.

He looked down at her. His eyes narrowed and his lips tightened. "Right now?"

Abby nodded. "It's getting a bit chilly," she said wrapping her arms around herself.

"Well I could find a way to keep you warm," he said, the faintest quirk of an eyebrow teasing her. But it didn't convince Abby.

She turned and looked toward the stable. She could hear the horses shifting about. They were tied up, restrained for the night, safe from harm.

"Maybe tomorrow you could show me the horses. I've always loved them. But I'm sure Boston riding is different from Montana riding," she said.

Nathan raised an eyebrow, looking like he was wondering if she was being serious.

"Sure. I can show you tomorrow," he murmured hesitantly. His attention seemed to drift off again.

Abby raised her shoulders up and took in a deep breath. "I really would like to go inside now Nathan," she insisted.

Nathan said nothing and merely nodded, apparently lost in thought. Then he turned and took Abby by the elbow. "Let me see you inside," he said.

Abby looked at him. She wondered where his mind was in that moment. Was it here with her, or somewhere in the past with someone else?

She let him lead her to the front door of the ranch house. He opened the door for her and gestured for her to enter. Abby thought of the bedroom upstairs and the bed that was waiting for them.

Suddenly Nathan stopped and didn't follow her inside.

Abby frowned. "Aren't you coming in?"

Nathan gave her a look that seemed to combine regret and sadness. Abby felt her heart sink. It was going to be like this after all, she thought.

"I think I'll stay out here for a while, if you don't mind, Abigail," he said quietly.

"But why...?" Abby started to ask. She took one look at his pained expression and stopped herself from asking a truly awkward question.

Nathan lowered his gaze for a moment. When his head rose, his eyes were shining slightly. "I don't rightly know how to explain it Abigail. I think it's just best that I remain here for a while. I need the air," he said slowly.

Abby nodded. "Okay Nathan. I understand.
 
At least I think I do," she said.

"I know you do, Abby. Get a good rest. I'll see you in the morning," he said with a note finality.

Abby's heart sank, her stomach curled and her legs felt weak. How could he do this to her? On their wedding night. She felt crushed.
 

Her wedding night.

She leaned against the door to steady herself. Nathan looked at her for a moment as he began to turn away. He seemed about to ask if she was okay. But then he paused.

Abby straightened herself up, standing tall. She wasn't going to let him see how she was feeling. If he needed the time to be by himself, then so be it.
 

She turned quickly and closed the door softly behind her.

Abigail Grantly wouldn't have a wedding night to remember. The more she thought about it the evening had turned out to be a wedding night she would never forget.
 

CHAPTER NINE

Abby awoke during the night and she was alone.

The bed seemed huge with only her in it. She ran her hand through her hair and tried to convince herself that the events of earlier that evening had been a nasty dream.

Nathan's absence in the bed told her it had been only too true. But where was he? Surely he wouldn't be sleeping somewhere else tonight of all nights.

She sighed and got up out of the bed and wrapped a gown around herself and put her slippers on. She went to the window and peered out into the darkness. It was almost pitch dark outside. Only a few small lamps hung on the doorways of the quarters of the ranch hands cast any light.

Then her eyes caught a flash of light moving away from the house.

It was Nathan.
 

He held a lamp in front of him and he was walking away from the house and out past the corral. It looked like he was heading uphill away to the rear of the house. Abby didn't know for sure what was up there.

Maybe now was the time to find out.

She ran downstairs and outside, following the direction of where she had seen Nathan heading. As she rounded the corner of the ranch house she saw the light from Nathan's lamp up ahead.

He was heading up a trail that led away from the collection of outbuildings, some of which housed the ranch hands. There was only darkness up there as far as Abby could make out.

She made her way forward, tripping and stumbling from time to time. She tried to make as little noise as possible. Nathan didn't turn around, seemingly so intent on his destination that even the sounds of Abby behind him weren't noticed.

The trail headed up a hill that became increasing steep until eventually it flattened out onto a wide, flat ridge.

There were a few scattered trees on the flat area. Nathan had stopped. He'd placed the lamp down on the ground in front of him.

Abby took up a position behind one of the trees. She was out of breath and feeling cold. Peering into the darkness she tried to make out what Nathan was standing in front of. There seemed to be some sort of rectangular bulk which Nathan had taken up a position in front of.

Then it came to her.

It was a grave!

And it could only be the grave of one person.

Nathan had come up to his wife's grave in the middle of the night.

Suddenly Abby felt she shouldn't be there any longer. It was not her place to intrude on such a quiet, private moment such as this. She had no place standing behind a tree, watching her new husband standing by the graveside, like this.

Then she heard a sound and she knew she shouldn't be there.

In the dark, under the stars of the Montana sky, hiding behind a tree in the middle of the night which should have been her wedding night, Abby distinctly heard Nathan speak.

She couldn't make out what he was saying. He was too far away for her to hear the words. But she could tell by his tone of voice that the words he was speaking by his deceased wife's graveside were sad. Unutterably sad.

Abby felt a lump rise in her throat. She tried to swallow, but she couldn't. In spite of herself she felt her eyes moisten. The image of Nathan standing there just affected her in a way that she could barely control.
 

She knew that if she cried out he would know she was there. If he turned and saw her skulking in the dark, spying on his intimate moment, what would he think of her?

Abby could barely contain the emotion she was feeling. He wouldn't understand why she had followed him.
 

Nathan's voice carried to her once again in the cool night air. Abby leaned back against the tree, wrenching her eyes away from the sight of Nathan. She gazed up at the stars twinkling through the bare branches of the tree.

If he discovered her hiding behind this tree she would never forgive herself.

She peered quickly around the tree. Nathan still had his back to her and he was still speaking.

Now was her moment.

Abby stepped away from the tree and made her way swiftly and quietly off the flat area and back onto the track.

She could just about see the house down at the bottom of the rise. It was so dark she couldn't see in front of her feet and she had to gingerly place one foot in front of the other. The hill seemed steeper going down than it had coming up. Abby stumbled a few times but eventually she made it to the house. It was with the greatest relief she had ever felt that she ran up the stairs, threw open the door to the bedroom and leapt onto the bed.

Up on the hill Nathan decided to wait to give Abby time to get back to the house. He'd known she'd been there, behind the tree, the whole time.

He didn't want to embarrass her by acknowledging that he knew she was there.

But he'd had to come up here. Tonight of all nights.

He felt bad. Mighty bad.

He'd thought he would be able to put the past behind him; thought he was ready to move. But he wasn't. Yet.

He knew that now. He'd discovered it at the corral, gazing up at the stars with his new wife in his arms.

Just like he'd done so many times with Lucy.

Abby hadn't deserved his coldness. He felt bad at the abrupt way he'd treated her. He wished he'd been more sensitive. But the thoughts of Lucy had filled his mind just at the moment when he'd least expected them to.

The cool night air blew the lamp light so that it flickered over the headstone of Lucy Grantly.

He'd come here so many times since she had passed. It was his way of reminding himself that his time with Lucy hadn't been a dream.

He'd lost count how many times he'd made the long climb up the hill. This was off limits to anyone except himself. None of the hands were allowed up here on the ridge. It was a private place reserved for the owner. And he liked it that way.

Now, however, things had changed. He had a new wife. His family had been put back together again, albeit without Lucy.

He knew he'd have to move on sometime. That was why he'd been so determined to get Abby to be his wife. He wanted the best for Emma and he was sure that Abby was just right for his daughter. He felt it in his bones.

Tonight, though, he felt he'd been harsh to her, denying her a wedding night to remember.

Standing there on the ridge he didn't rightly know how he was going to make it up to Abby. But he'd have to, in some way or other.
 

CHAPTER TEN
 

Next day Abby was up bright and early. As she got herself ready for her first day as a rancher's wife she thought about all the different ways she could keep herself busy. She had to keep herself busy. Anything to avoid thinking of last night.

Looking out the window she could see that the ranch was already a hive of activity. She was sure there would be plenty of ways to take her mind of the terrible events of the previous night.

Nathan hadn't come to the bedroom at all during the night. She wondered where he could have slept. But, he was the owner. She was sure he had plenty of places he could lay his head down well away from his wife, if he really wanted to.

Abby felt the stab of irritation rise up in her again. She knew she should at least try to understand Nathan and his conduct of the night before. But right now she couldn't. All his declarations and ardent promises seemed like so much hot air after a night like the one she had just passed through.

She went downstairs and into the kitchen. Mrs.Wardle chatted amiably and fed Abby a fine breakfast. Nathan was nowhere to be seen, a point which obviously wasn't lost on Mrs.Wardle.

"Where is Emma?" Abby asked Mrs.Wardle.

The housekeeper glanced out the kitchen window. "I do believe she's out at the corral. She loves those horses," she said with a shake of the head.

Abby went outside and saw Emma sitting astride a large, brown horse. She was being led around the corral by one of the hands who gripped a leather strap attached to the horse's head.

When Emma saw Abby she screamed with excitement and started waving. "Abby! Look at me. Aren't I just like a grown up," Emma called out.

Abby made her way hurriedly to the wooden fencing of the corral. She gripped onto the wooden bars and looked at the ranch hand who was controlling the horse. "Morning. I don't know your name," she said to him.

The ranch hand tipped his hat. He was a tall, lean man, with sun weathered skin. He was dressed in jeans and plain blue shirt. His boots were dust covered.

"Lyle, ma'am," he answered.

"Lyle. Do you think it's safe for Emma to be on a horse that big?"

Lyle smiled and glanced at Emma. "This little girl is the best horsewoman I've seen in these parts. I don't think you need to worry about her. She can look after herself," he said.
 

Lyle turned and winked at Abby. She nodded conspiratorially. Lyle continued to lead Emma around the corral. Abby watched them together, figuring she had some things she'd have to get used to out in Montana. Amongst them was little girls being a whole lot more independent than the delicate little flowers she'd known growing up back in Boston.