Nanny Piggins and the Pursuit of Justice (21 page)

‘But you didn’t, did you? You saw it as an opportunity for revenge, and you ruthlessly gave her a sentence 50 times greater than the sentencing guidelines!’ Boris continued ruthlessly. ‘Don’t try to deny it – it’s the real truth, isn’t it?’

Judge Birchmore cracked, bursting into tears. ‘All right, all right, I admit I did it. I wanted to punish the pig for ruining my life.’

She went on to say a lot more but it was hard to understand what it was, because of all the sobbing and sniffing and blowing her nose that followed. (People who do not cry very often tend to overcompensate once they get started.)

‘Don’t worry,’ said Boris kindly as he patted the judge’s hand (because he was, at heart, a very lovely bear). ‘If you need a lawyer when Nanny Piggins sues you for wrongful community servicing, I’ll represent you. I’m sure I can get you off if we plead insanity.’

‘Here, here,’ agreed Nanny Piggins. ‘You only have to look at her to see she desperately needs a slice of cake and a good lie down.’

‘Who is that bear?’ asked Mr Green, leaning forward to his children. ‘Where did he come from?’

‘Um . . .’ said Derrick.

‘The firm should hire him,’ said Mr Green. ‘He is a brilliant trial lawyer.’

And so it was Judge Birchmore who was led weeping from the court, while Nanny Piggins was set free. Her community service requirement had been reduced to the much more reasonable 200
hours, which was easily covered by the work she had already completed, so they all went home to celebrate by eating lots of cake.

‘Thank you, Boris,’ said Nanny Piggins as she handed her brother another generous slice of honey cake. ‘I’m so lucky to have such a wonderful and talented brother.’

‘It was my pleasure,’ blushed Boris as he burst into tears again. (He had been crying tears of joy all afternoon.)

‘How did you get to be so good at being a lawyer when you’ve only had half a semester at law school?’ asked Michael.

‘I think I’ve just got the knack for it,’ explained Boris. ‘Being a trial lawyer is a lot like doing ballet. When you do ballet you glide about while everyone watches you pretend to be a swan. And in the law you glide about while everyone watches you pretend to know what you’re talking about. It’s the same skill set really.’

‘You are certainly much better than Montgomery St John,’ said Nanny Piggins.

‘Yes, I know,’ agreed Boris. ‘That’s because I made sure I had plenty of chapstick in my briefcase.’

‘And Nanny Piggins, you will promise to stay out of legal trouble from now on, won’t you?’ pleaded Samantha.

‘I will try,’ promised Nanny Piggins.

‘Really?’ asked Michael.

‘Oh yes,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘I know going to jail sounds like fun. Being locked up with all those interesting people should be like one big slumber party. But I don’t think I would like it because I would miss you three terribly.’

The children hugged her.

‘So I promise to be good,’ said Nanny Piggins.

The children sighed with relief.

‘At least until Thursday,’ added Nanny Piggins.

‘What happens on Thursday?’ asked Samantha, beginning to worry again.

‘Isabella Dunkhurst gets back from Botswana, so I figure I can relax a little bit then,’ explained Nanny Piggins.

The children hugged their nanny even tighter. They just had to accept that when your nanny is the World’s Most Glamorous Flying Pig, the chances of her being in trouble with the law are always going to be slightly higher than for normal people.

About the Author

R. A. Spratt is an award-winning comedy writer with fourteen years’ experience in the television industry. She lives in Sydney with her husband and two daughters. Unlike Nanny Piggins, she has never willingly been blasted out of a cannon.

To find more, visit
www.raspratt.com

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Version 1.0

Nanny Piggins and the Pursuit of Justice

Copyright © R. A. Spratt

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

A Random House book

Published by Random House Australia Pty Ltd

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www.randomhouse.com.au

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National Library of Australia

Cataloguing-in-Publication Entry

Author: Spratt, R. A.

Title: Nanny Piggins and the Pursuit of Justice

ISBN: 978 1 74274 444 5 (eBook)

Series: Nanny Piggins; 6.

Target Audience: For primary school age

Dewey Number: A823.4

Cover illustration by Gypsy Taylor

Cover design by Christabella Designs

Internal design and illustrations by Jobi Murphy

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