My Shameful Secret (Forbidden Stepbrother Billionaire Romance) (2 page)

“Wake up, Mish.”
 

I opened my eyes groggily at the words. When my sleep-blurred vision adjusted to the darkness in my room, my brother’s face, illuminated by the silvery light streaming in from the window, slowly came into focus.

I sat up in shock. “Saehan?” I rubbed my eyes and switched my bedside light on.
 

It was really him. He was seated on the foot of my bed, his hair still wet from the shower, dressed in a black V-necked shirt and jeans.

When my eyes flitted towards the door, my brother said casually, “I picked it.”

I gaped at him. My perfect brother knew how to pick a lock?

He shrugged. “I wanted to see you before I leave.”

The words had me diving under the covers and burying my face against my pillow. “You’ve seen me,” I muttered, voice muffled. “Now go.”

“What the—” My brother started to laugh.

I wrapped the blanket around myself more tightly, turning myself into a cocoon. “I’m not going to see you off,” I gritted out.

“I know that,” my brother said patiently. “That’s why I’m saying goodbye now.”

I squeezed my eyes shut to stop the tears. “Goodbye.”
 

“That’s it?” he asked teasingly.

“Yes,” I choked. “That’s it.” But the words were barely out of my mouth when he started tugging on the covers. I tried to resist but of course he was too strong. A few more tugs, and the covers were thrown out of the way.

“Mish, come on.” He flipped me on my back.

So unfair, I thought miserably. My brother knew how I couldn’t ever resist him when he talked to me like that.

He smiled when I finally looked at him. “You’re usually so serious,” he murmured. “I don’t know what to do when you suddenly act your age.”

When I just looked at him stonily, he said gently, “It’s not like I’m going away forever.”

“But that’s how it feels,” I muttered.

“You can call me—”

“Everyday?” I asked hopefully.

He rolled his eyes. “That’s an exaggeration.”

I glared up at him. “Then it will feel like forever.”

My brother chuckled. “Come on, Mish.”

I sat up with a shake of my head. “Maybe it’s different for you, ‘coz you’ve always been so popular. But I’m not like you. I don’t have any friends. I don’t have anyone to talk to…” My voice broke, and I lowered my head as I fought back tears.

“I know all that, brat,” my brother said quietly over my head. “But you see, that’s also one of the reasons why I have to leave.”

Still not looking at him, I mumbled, “I don’t get it.”

He tipped my chin up. “You rely on me too much.”

“But you’re my brother,” I said automatically. “It’s your job to help me.”

He pinched my cheeks. “There you go acting like a spoiled brat again. You’re one of the smartest girls I know. I’m sure you understand.”

“Nope.” But we both knew I was lying – and that he was right.

All these years, I had shamelessly relied on him. I had never bothered trying to make friends because I was content with having my brother to talk to. I had never even considered trying to come out of my shell. A part of me figured I could always work for my brother in the future and not have to worry about anything.

He ruffled my hair. “It’s going to be okay, you know.” When I didn’t answer, his lips twitched once more just before he flicked my forehead. “Brat. Pouting didn’t work for you when you were five. What makes you think it would work now?”

Turning red because I had been hoping pouting would work, I grabbed my pillow and tried to hit him on the face. “Shut up!”

My brother laughingly caught my wrist. “Stop it.” He pulled my hand down, sobering. “Promise me you’ll try to make friends this year.”

I shrugged.

“Mish,” he said warningly.

I lifted my shoulders, shamelessly guilt-tripping him.

He released my hand. “You won’t be my sister if you don’t make that promise.”

The words had me sniffing. “That may have worked before, but not anymore.” But the way my brother just grinned told me he knew I didn’t mean it.

Even now, his threat still worked. I really wanted to be his sister.

7

I was sixteen when a boy asked me out the first time. We had shared a few classes since freshmen year and on a day we happened to walk home together, he suddenly asked if I wanted to attend a party with him.

The question was a pleasant surprise, but it had me nervous, too. I didn’t know how to react. Since I had always thought myself plain, the idea of having a guy ask me out never crossed my mind.

“Misha?” Jared prompted.

He stopped walking, forcing me to stop as well. He took a peek at my face, his proximity making me blush.

“You heard me, right?”
 

I cleared my throat. “I, umm…I’m not really good with parties.” I gave him a self-conscious look. “And I’m not good with this either.”

“It doesn’t have to be a party,” he said quickly. “We could just go out and watch a movie or something…” He paused, gauging my reaction, and what he saw made Jared’s lips quirk in an exasperated smile. “You really never knew, didn’t you?”

“Knew…what?”

“I’ve had a crush on you since sixth grade, you know.” He laughed, the sound self-conscious. “I would have asked you out sooner if I hadn’t been scared shitless by the thought of your brother beating me into a bloody pulp.”

I shook my head right away. “My brother wouldn’t do something like that!”

This time, Jared really laughed. “You’re serious, aren’t you?” He shook his head. “I guess your big bro didn’t tell you, but he made it very clear to every guy who happened to look at you the wrong way that you’re off limits.” He hesitated. “You really didn’t know?”

“No,” I admitted slowly. “I didn’t.” And now that I knew, I wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

When we reached my home, Jared asked, “Tomorrow…?”

He was a pretty outgoing guy, but right now he was acting really shy. It was kinda cute, and it also made me less nervous about the idea of going on a date for the first time.

Biting my lip, I asked, “Just a movie, right?”

He nodded. “Just a movie, and we could have a late or early dinner, too, if you want. It’s your call.”

“Then…okay.”

I colored at the hopeful tone of his voice, but I couldn’t help smiling either. “Okay.”

We agreed on a time and date to meet, and by the time I was inside the house, I felt absolutely dazed. Was I really going out on a date? With Jared?

The phone rang then, and when I answered, my voice was still breathless with excitement. “H-hello?”

“It’s me, brat.” Saehan’s voice was a mixture of affection and amusement. “You okay? You sound like you just finished a race or something.”

I giggled.

“Did you just giggle, brat?”

I hesitated then blurted out happily, “I’m going out on a date tomorrow.”

Silence.

A moment later, my brother asked abruptly, “With whom?”

“Jared. He plays football like you and…” I recalled Jared’s earlier words. “You know, he told me the strangest thing. He said you warned off the guys in school from me.”

I expected him to deny it, but my brother only said, “Yeah. I did.”

I gasped. “You did?”

“You’re my sister, Mish. I need to make sure no asshole thinking of cashing in on the St. Clair name gets near you.”

Oh. The explanation made sense. “I get it.” I smiled ruefully. “I always forget you’re Mr. Hotshot.” It was true.

Normally, my brother would say something sarcastic when I called him that. But this time, he was just silent. “Saehan?” Taking the wireless receiver with me, I lowered my bag to the floor and padded towards the couch. “You still there?”

“Where are you going tomorrow?”

“A movie then dinner after.”

“You already told Mom and Dad?”

I rolled my eyes. “They’d probably push me out of the door in their excitement. You know how they are.”

Another moment of silence before my brother said curtly, “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

I was startled. “Why not?” When he didn’t answer, I pressed on. “Saehan?”

“Because he’s probably just dating you to spite me.”

Now I was even more bemused. “Spite you?”

“The girl he was dating before,” Saehan clarified, his voice unusually impatient. “She dumped him for me.”

“I see.” I chewed on my lip, wondering if that was really the case. “But Jared—”

I only meant to say that Jared didn’t seem to be that kind of person, but it was as if merely mentioning the other guy’s name was enough to trigger my brother’s temper.

“Will you stop being a blind idiot?”
 

I almost reared back, Saehan’s savage tone taking me by surprise.

“He wants to hurt me through you! Can’t you see that?”

“But how can you be sure?” I stammered in protest. “And I don’t think Jared—”

“Stop saying his name like you know him so fucking well,” my brother hissed. “I’m the one who knows you, Mish. Not him. So if I tell you not to go out with him, just say yes, dammit!”

All I could do was stare at the phone when he finished speaking. Was it really my brother speaking to me like that? He had never been this overbearing or unreasonable. “Saehan, I…”

My brother cut me off, saying coldly, “You really think a popular guy like Jared Stark would want someone like you?”

I whitened.

Saehan cursed. “Misha—”

I cut him off, saying tightly, “I think you’ve said enough.” I ended the call. I made it as far as my room before I broke down crying.
 

8

SAEHAN

I’m not sure when it started. One day, she was just my cute little sister, someone who hero-worshipped me from day one. Unlike my friends’ baby sisters, mine hadn’t been bratty at all – even though I liked to call her that. She rarely cried, and the only time she threw a tantrum was because a little bitch had told her she didn’t have any brother.

And then gradually, things changed.

At first, it was the little things that I noticed – things that I had never paid attention to in the past. She had a modest taste in fashion, but even so, there wasn’t anything she could do to hide her slender curves. Every time I came home for term break, I’d find myself constantly surprised at how she had filled out nicely. When her shirt was a little too tight, I’d notice how it clung to her pert little breasts. When she wore skirts, I’d notice how they molded to her shapely behind or how they made her silky legs seem even longer.

Every time I noticed those things, I’d shove the thought away immediately. I’d tell myself that because I was a man, it was impossible not to notice those things. But because she was my little sister and I was her big brother, I would never act on those thoughts.
 

Never.

As it turned out,
never
was a big word.
 

The day I found out she was about to go on a date…
yeah,
I fucked up that time, I admit that.