My Dearest Naomi (11 page)

Robert said, “You don’t have to sit down to think about him, do you?”

And I said, “Certainly not.”

It’s always nice when people around you understand, especially boys.

Please tell Lonnie and Luella “hi” for me.

Here I am again after writing you a letter this afternoon and getting it ready for tomorrow. I don’t know exactly why I’m writing now except I’m so lonely for you. I don’t know what’s the matter with me. It seems so much harder to be apart from you since your trip back. Maybe it’s because
I’m still not feeling well. I know it will be a great relief once I don’t have this constant headache.

We bought three storybooks on the trip into Bloomington, and I’ve read one through already. Maybe I shouldn’t read with my head throbbing, but it takes my mind off the pain—some of it anyway. I’m lying on my bed, holding my head with one hand, and writing with the other. My room is an absolute, total disaster and does nothing to revive my spirits. I suppose I will get things a little in order before I shut down for the night.

Dad and Mom went to the school meeting since they like to keep up with what’s going on.

I didn’t go to work after all this morning because I still had my headache. Thankfully, it is somewhat better now. The young folks have something going tonight. They’re going to make cider at the Harveys using hand presses.
Yah,
that should be fun, and we’ll have cider to drink afterward. Don is driving tonight, and we’ll leave right after chores.

How is school going? You haven’t written anything about it recently.

I have to work tomorrow for Mrs. Bach because she wants to go somewhere again. That means John to take care of and that awful dog. Somehow I have to make friends with him, but he is a nasty creature with bulging eyes and chops that nearly drag the floor. I guess God made all creatures, and somewhere in the human heart there must be love hidden for all of them.

I long to see you so much,

Naomi

October 11

Things are exceedingly boring around here. I often try to imagine what you might be doing. I dwell on the sweet memories of our last time together, which tends to make the situation worse instead of better. It seems like years since I’ve seen you.

My mom wrote yesterday. I followed your suggestion and sent her a fat letter. It’s hard to imagine that my school news is interesting to anyone, but she thought it was. And that’s about all the news I had to send her. She said she’s sending books for me to read, and she also tried to give me a pep talk. Apparently some of my misery must have come through.

Last night the young folks attended services at a street mission fifteen miles from here. The place is open to anyone who needs meals and a bed for the night. There is one catch though. Before anyone stays for the night they have to attend an hour-long gospel service. When we arrived, there were around thirty men sitting inside, looking like a tough bunch. They had the men sitting on one side, and the visitors on the other. One of the young folk boys presented a devotion, and the whole youth group sang for twenty minutes. Afterward, Stanley, one of the married men who came along, gave a thirty-minute sermon.

I think I would like working in a place like that. It would give a worthwhile feeling to help people who have so terribly lost their way. Especially people who are living out on the streets.

I hope you are keeping yourself entertained and that the flu bug has passed on by now. The best to you.

Love you,

Eugene

October 11

How does this find you? Well and happy, I hope.

Don, Dad, and Lester went fishing at the Yoders’ pond tonight. They left with the open buggy. Brrr…it’s pretty chilly and cloudy. They’re planning to fish till late. I can’t see what is so fun about fishing, but they were all excited.

Last night was a beautiful evening, but according to how I was feeling it should have been raining cats and dogs. I cried upstairs with my head under the pillow for a long time so Mom couldn’t hear me. It must be the aftereffects of that nasty flu spell I had.

To top things off, I had a big disappointment tonight when I arrived home. Boo hoo…no letter from you. I will try to wait patiently.

You might not have much news to write about, but it would’ve been great just to hear from you. Maybe it is better I don’t have you around at the moment since I’m fighting back the tears. But having you here would make them go away, wouldn’t it? Yes, it would. Now I’m really crying, and it’s all your fault.

I had to struggle against tears more than a few times today, and I almost cried in public, which was a new experience for me. Usually when I’m around people I’m not bothered with the threat of tears. Thankfully things got better as the day progressed. Perhaps I shouldn’t be telling you this, lest you think there’s something seriously wrong with me or with our relationship. There’s not. It’s just that I’m so sad and can’t really explain why. I hope you can understand.

Church was at Bishop Enos’s, and the young folks had a short singing in the afternoon for some of the old people who live in town. Dad didn’t want me taking our horse Vick because he’s lame, so we hitched up the younger one. I don’t think Dad would have let me drive him without Don along. Can you believe that?

I didn’t want to go at all, really, not with such sorrow hanging over my head, but I thought it’d look silly if I didn’t. When we walked out to the buggy, I wavered again at the thought of the drive into town.

I said to Don, “Listen, I don’t feel very well, and I’d rather stay home. So why don’t you go by yourself?”

Don shrugged because he didn’t care one way or the other either. Betsy, who was also going, threw a fit. But I still wouldn’t have gone if Adam and
Brenda, with Julia riding with them, hadn’t driven up right then. They saw I wasn’t planning to go. Adam said, “Oh, come on, Naomi!” and this and that until I climbed into our buggy. We caravanned to the gathering.

After we arrived, we walked all over town, stopping to sing at only two places because nobody else was at home. So my instincts had been correct. I should have stayed home.

Guess what? We have received a wedding present already. Someone I used to work for gave us a silver tea set. He said he wanted to give it to me when I married, but now he is getting married. They have two of everything, so he thought he’d give me the present now. That’s strange since his place is the one I liked to work at the least.

I used to clean for him before I started dating you. His first wife was still living then, and they had the messiest house you ever saw. Anyway, I never thought I’d own something that’s made of silver.

I received one of your longed-for letters today. When Mom told me yesterday that it was a mail holiday because of Columbus Day, I was quite disappointed. You don’t know how much I look forward to your letters.

You did scare me a little because you sounded so down. Is everything okay? I’m glad you continue writing regardless of how you feel.

When I think of how much you love me, I certainly don’t feel worthy of it—more overwhelmed than anything else. I was happy to hear that you think God still forgives us of our faults because He surely does, otherwise there would be little hope for any of us.

The young folks are going to sing on Friday night for an
Englisha
neighbor, Mr. Burns, who has cancer. That should make for an interesting and worthwhile time.

Oh no! I have gotten carried away with my writing. It’s past ten already. Nine was supposed to be my self-imposed deadline for bed tonight.

By the way, I don’t get bored with your letters, and the longer they are the better. My love will never cease for you, and you should never fear. I also treasure the memories of our times together. I just can’t write the way you do, but you have to remember that the very things you treasure about me, I also treasure about you. In a different way, no doubt, but I treasure them all the same.

I could go on writing if I had the right words, but I don’t. So goodnight for now.

I love you,

Naomi

October 13

I was surprised and thrilled at finding another letter from you when I arrived home tonight. Your letters mean so much to me, and I look for them with great eagerness. And interestingly enough, the last two got switched around somehow, so I guess the mailman isn’t perfect. I also received the card today, which is very beautiful.

Did I tell you the second batch of sparrows from the school project were dead the other morning? They died suddenly overnight for no known reason, so I have given up. There will be no more sparrows.

The mouse is doing fine, though, but we still haven’t caught anymore. The children are still looking. Perhaps the survival rate of this one is higher because it is a field mouse. I caught a house mouse in Lonnie’s garage last week with a live trap. I put it in with the field mouse. They spat at each other and looked ready for murder, so I didn’t dare leave them together even for one night. So that venture failed. I took the house mouse outside and let it go.

Today I had Dena, one of the eight-graders, take some of the minor responsibilities off my shoulders. She had free time and looked bored, so I had her take the first graders to the blackboard to practice writing and recognizing the numbers from 1 to 1000.

Tomorrow I will work with them myself. I prefer that rather than letting someone else do it, but today I had social studies and that’s always a hassle. So while I was up front teaching fifth grade social studies, Dena was at the board on the other end of the room writing down numbers for the first graders.

I was trying to keep my eyes on both places at the same time, glancing back and forth. When we had finished checking papers and were ready to read, I told the class to start. While I was looking back at the board, absorbed in watching what they were doing, the fifth-grade class burst out laughing. I quickly snapped my gaze back to them. They were wanting to know who was supposed to read next but noticed I was intent on looking at the first-grade class in back. They got a good laugh out of that.

Little Lydia has had an awful time with her vocabulary, struggling with even the simplest of words. On the fourth lesson this year, her grade was down in the forties. I took her aside that day, telling her that it’s time to do something about the problem. The poor girl. I asked her why she
doesn’t look up the words in the dictionary, and she said, “Because I don’t understand what it says.” She didn’t say it sassily, but in her usual cheerful manner, as if things simply were so and nothing could be done about it.

I have been going over the words with her the last two weeks, showing her how to match them up in the dictionary and explaining the words she doesn’t understand. From her improved grade this week, I believe that aid helped. The fact that she doesn’t know words shows up in reading class. Today we were reading in social studies, and she didn’t know what “rapid” meant.

Well, it’s about 6:00 so Luella will have supper ready soon. Tomorrow morning Lonnie and Luella will be fasting because they have communion on Sunday. I’ll fast too, even if I’m not participating in communion.

With all my heart and love,

Eugene

October 15

This letter finds me tired and feeling so-so. Ada brought us two jugs of cider from the young folks’ cider pressing the other night. I knew it was good because I had some that evening. Now Dad wants popcorn to go with it, so I’ll bring the popper out soon. This will be a popcorn and cider night around here.

Don went with the young folks to sing at the
Englisha
neighbor’s place. I finally gave out, and said I wasn’t going since I didn’t feel well. I guess I need another good letter from you to cheer me up, but there was none in the mailbox today.

We’re supposed to have frost in the morning. The weather is so unpredictable this time of year, we never know what it is going to do next. Tomorrow, if it’s still nice, Betsy and I are planning to help Elena Marshall rake her leaves and get her flowerbeds fixed up.

Rumor has it that Richard and Joan are planning to begin milking by spring. He’s already doing work on the barn. They moved to a place on the south side of the community. I don’t see how in the world they can afford to start milking, but Don said Richard gets $16 an hour for painting jobs, so he must have money saved up. Dad says it’s hard for young people to start out farming and make a go of it with the way milk prices are.

Robert’s Rosemary had the flu bad enough she had to be in the hospital for a day, but she’s older, so maybe that was the reason she had such a bad case. I am good and depressed as I battle the flu bug, but thankfully there is no need for hospitalization. That’s not really funny, I know.

I miss you so much. I sit here thinking how nice it would be to see you and have a good talk again. One of the girls who is dating talked with me last Sunday evening. She thinks it’s bad when she doesn’t get to see her boyfriend throughout the week. I could have laughed at her, but I remember I used to feel the same way. I told her you don’t know how glad you can be to see someone until you actually experience a long separation.