Murder With All the Trimmings

Table of Contents

 

 

“A funny, laugh-out-loud whodunit. Elaine Viets has created characters that you can identify with. . . . This is one book you don’t want to miss.”—The Romance Readers Connection

“A well-thought-out whodunit starring a sleuth who is totally believable and a bit quirky.”—
Midwest Book Review

“A very interesting series. . . . I’m looking forward to the next book.”—
Deadly Pleasures

“[A] laugh-out-loud comedic murder mystery guaranteed to keep you entertained for any number of hours—the perfect read for a rainy day. . . . Shopping, St. Louis culinary treats, and mayhem abound, providing for a satisfying read.”

—Front Street Reviews

“
High Heels Are Murder
takes Josie into the wicked world of murder, mayhem, and toe cleavage. From the sweat and toil of having to work three jobs to afford a Prada knockoff to the glamorous world of stiletto shopping, Viets spans the female psyche with panache and wit.”—
South Florida Sun-Sentinel

“Viets has written one of the funniest amateur sleuth mysteries to come along in ages. Her protagonist is a thoroughly likable person, a great mother, daughter, and friend. . . . The strength and the freshness of the tale lies in the characters.”

—
Midwest Book Review

“Finally, a protagonist we can relate to.”

—
Riverfront Times
(St. Louis, MO)

“Laugh-out-loud humor adds to the brisk action of
Dying in Style
...with an insightful look at the bonds between mother and daughter, the challenges of living in a multigenerational household, and the rewards of nonjudgmental friendship.Viets’s fast pace is complemented by realistic dialogue and well-drawn characters in believable relationships. Viets affectionately uses her native St. Louis as the backdrop for this new series.”

—
South Florida Sun-Sentinel

“Humorous and socially conscious . . . rollicking fun.”

—
Publishers Weekly

“Brave Viets preps by actually working the jobs she describes in loving and hilarious detail, giving her offbeat series a healthy balance between the banal and the bizarre.”—
Kirkus Reviews

“Viets shows an uncanny ability to mix humor, quirky characters, and murder into an entertaining page-turner.”

—
Romantic Times

“This novel goes deeper than Viets’s previous books, as Hawthorne must confront her complicated feelings. . . . Her style of justice will make this book—and its ending—one of Viets’s most satisfying.”—
The Miami Herald

“Full of wry social commentary.”
—Publishers Weekly

“Elaine Viets knows how to turn minimum wage into maximum hilarity. With such a fast-paced story and nonstop wisecracks, never has a dead-end job sounded so downright funny!”

—Nancy Martin

“Wickedly funny.”—
The Miami Herald

“Viets has a wry way with humor. . . . The snapshots of lunatic dog owners are priceless.”—
Kirkus Reviews

“Viets writes a laugh-out-loud comedy with enough twists and turns to make it to the top. . . . In fact, she’s been nominated for a truckload of awards this year. . . . There is a good reason why Viets is taking the mystery genre by storm these days. . . . She can keep you wondering ‘Who done it?’ while laughing all the way to the last page.”—
Florida Today

“Wry sense of humor, appealing, realistic characters, and a briskly moving plot.”—
South Florida Sun-Sentinel

“A great writer . . . simply superb.”—
Midwest Book Review

“Fans of Janet Evanovich and Parnell Hall will appreciate Viets’s humor.”—
South Florida Sun-Sentinel

“Elaine Viets’s debut is a live wire. . . . Helen Hawthorne takes Florida by storm. Shop no further—this is the one.”

—Tim Dorsey

“I loved this book. With a stubborn . . . heroine, a wonderful South Florida setting, and a cast of more-or-less lethal bimbos,
Shop Till You Drop
provides tons of fun. Six-toed cats, expensive clothes, sexy guys on motorcycles—this book has it all.”

—Charlaine Harris

“Fresh, funny, and fiendishly constructed . . . a bright start to an exciting new series. This one is hard to beat.”

—Parnell Hall, author of the Puzzle Lady crossword puzzle mysteries

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First published by Obsidian, an imprint of New American Library,
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First Printing, November 2008

Copyright © Elaine Viets, 2008

eISBN : 978-1-440-65300-1

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Acknowledgments

So many people helped me with this book; I don’t want to forget anyone. Thanks to my St. Louis experts, Jinny Gender, Karen Grace, and Janet Smith. Thanks also to Valerie Cannata, Colby Cox, Susan Carlson, Kay Gordy, and Anne Watts.

I also want to thank Emma, my expert on nine-year-olds. She used to be one last year. Emma gave me deep background on what it’s like to be nine years old. I wish I could use her real name, but the world is a dangerous place these days for little girls.

As always, thanks and love to my husband, Don Crinklaw, for his extraordinary help and patience. It’s not easy to live with a writer, but he manages.

My agent, David Hendin, is still the best.

My editor, Kara Cesare, devoted long hours to editing and guiding this project. Thanks also to Lindsay Nouis and the ever-careful Obsidan copy editor and production staff, and to publicist Leslie Henkel.

With thanks to Book Tarts—Nancy Martin, Michele Martinez, Harley Jane Kozak, Kathy Sweeney, and Sarah Strohmeyer—you’ve been true blog sisters on The Lipstick Chronicles.

Many booksellers help keep this series alive. I wish I had room to thank them all. I really appreciate their efforts.

Thanks to the librarians at the Broward County Library and the St. Louis Public Library who researched my questions, no matter how strange, and always answered with a straight face.

Thanks to public relations experts Patti Nunn and Jack Klobnak.

Thanks to super saleswoman Carole Wantz, and to the many members of the mystery community who were so kind to me when I was sick.

Special thanks to the law enforcement men and women who answered countless questions on police procedure. Some of my police and medical sources have to remain nameless, but I want to thank them anyway. Particular thanks to Detective R. C. White, Fort Lauderdale Police Department (retired).

Any mistakes are mine, not theirs.

Chapter 1