Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy: The Last Man in the World (14 page)

With
all best wishes,

G.
Wickham

No.
He could not possibly have meant it in such a way. That he had lied to her she
had accepted, but that he would risk ruining a young girl and suggest such
blackmail! It was beyond belief. She scanned the letter again, hoping against
hope to discover a different meaning in it. But it was clear enough; he would
only marry Lydia if Elizabeth somehow produced the required sum. Twelve
thousand! Did he think Darcy so besotted with her that he would part with so
much money? Wickham was due for an unpleasant surprise in that case.

So
Lydia would be ruined, and the Bennet family along with her. Tears came to
Elizabeth's eyes for her poor, foolish sister, and the price Lydia would pay
for the rest of her life. It would cost Elizabeth as well. Now there was no
hope Darcy would accept her family. The scandal it would bring to the Darcy
name would make it impossible. They would have to break all ties to her family.
Even then, Darcy would never forgive her this.

There
was no hiding from it, either. Elizabeth would have to tell him and see the
disgust in his eyes. But first she would take action herself. In that way at
least she might redeem herself slightly in her husband's eyes.

She
crossed to the inlaid writing desk and took out a sheet of paper.

Elizabeth
paused outside the door to Darcy's bedroom. Her trepidation of the outcome was
so great that it could make no difference what happened; it could be no worse
than she imagined--more humiliation and a death knell to any hopes she harboured
that Darcy might one day care for her again.

Ferguson
opened the door to her knock. She glanced over his shoulder; Darcy was awake,
so she had no excuse for delay there.

"Mrs.
Darcy," the valet said, holding the door open for her.

"Thank
you, Ferguson. I would like to speak with my husband alone."

He
bowed. "Of course, madam." He closed the door behind him.

The
distance between the doorway and the bed seemed to have lengthened since the
last time Elizabeth had walked it. Her husband was half-sitting, propped up
with pillows. A lock of dark hair fell over his forehead, and she fought the
urge to straighten it. He would not appreciate the gesture.

She
sat beside the bed. "You look well today, sir." In truth, his face
was even thinner, and it pained her to see it.

"My
health continues to improve, I thank you." Darcy's countenance was
serious. "I hope you are well."

"I
am, but I have news of an unfortunate nature to discuss with you."

He
stiffened slightly, his expression becoming more guarded. "Yes,
madam?"

Elizabeth
wanted to look away, but she would not be so cowardly.

"Yesterday
I received a letter from my sister Jane informing me that my youngest sister
had eloped with an officer. It contained no details, except that attempts to find
her had proved unsuccessful." She handed him the letter, but he did not
open it. She took a deep breath. "Today a letter from Lydia came by
express. At least it purported to be from Lydia; in fact most of it is written
by Mr. Wickham, making an offer of an offensive nature."

This
time he perused the letter immediately, frowning as he did so.

She
did not wait for his response. "I have already sent my reply. I told Lydia
that under no circumstances would I agree to Mr. Wickham's request, but as I found
I could not leave her in such straits as to force her to live on the streets, I
would arrange for a small allowance to be paid to my uncle Gardiner to cover
the cost of an anonymous retreat for her. Lastly, I wrote to my sister Jane and
asked her to explain to my parents why they would not hear from me again."
She was proud of herself; her voice had remained calm even though the pain in
her chest was fierce.

"You
have heard nothing further?"

"Nothing,
sir."

He
looked at the letter once more. "Would you be so kind as to inform Colonel
Fitzwilliam I wish to speak with him immediately?" His tone was more
absent than anything else.

"Of
course." All that was left for her was to retire with dignity.

Chapter 13

Elizabeth
felt too listless to stir from her room at dinnertime. Lucy brought her up a
tray of food, though she had not asked for it, along with the news that Colonel
Fitzwilliam would be departing at first light. She also brought a letter from
Mrs. Gardiner, with the expected news that their Northern tour was indefinitely
postponed. The need to remain in London and to search for Lydia came first. It
did not make her cry; she felt too numb for that. She asked Ferguson to relay
the news to Darcy. She did not wish to observe his reaction to the knowledge
that he was free of the obligation of the visit.

She
penned a quick response, including the direction Wickham had given as a
possibility for their search, but without a word as to how she came into
possession of it. In closing, she sent all her best love and respect, with
special messages for each of the children. She sealed it and gave it to Lucy to
send before she lost her courage. There was no doubt in her mind that it would
be the last communication she would have with them. After this disgrace, even
she could see the danger to the Darcy family name. Her duty was clear, no
matter how it tore at her heart.

Now
she was truly alone. She had depended so much upon the idea of the Gardiners'
visit, not only for the connection to people she cared about, but for the
opportunity to seek her aunt's wisdom about her confusing relationship with
Darcy. Well, it was confusing no longer; she knew precisely what he felt.

There
was nothing to be done for it. She had lost everything of value to her: her husband's
love, her family, her home, her faith in her own judgment and good sense. The
brief taste of happiness she had experienced when she thought Darcy's affection
for her was undiminished only made her present state the more bitter, and she
had no one to blame but herself.

It
was hardest to live with the knowledge of how much she must have hurt him. He
had loved her ardently, of that she had no doubt, and now she understood the
bitter pain of rejection. How much the worse it must have been for him, to have
thought he had her affection for those months, only to learn the truth! How
could she have been so cruel? Her present sufferings were well deserved.

Elizabeth
managed a small semblance of a smile for Georgiana when the girl came to see
her in her room.

Georgiana's
hands were clasped tightly in front of her. "Are you angry with me,
Elizabeth?"

"No,
of course not." Elizabeth gestured to an empty chair.

The
girl shifted uncomfortably. "You have not been down for a meal in two
days, so I thought perhaps I had done something to off end you."

"No,
indeed." Elizabeth searched for words. "I have been fit company for
no one but myself. I beg your pardon for worrying you."

"Is
there anything I can do to help?"

Elizabeth
looked out the window to avoid Georgiana's eyes. "I suppose there is no
point in secrecy, since you will discover it eventually in any case.

My
youngest sister is lost to us, my family is in disgrace, and I with them."

"Lost
to you?" Georgiana exclaimed. "What has happened?"

"An
officer convinced her to elope with him. She is young and foolish, but that is
no excuse. Her thoughtlessness has ruined my family. It is not the sort of
thing that would happen in a family like yours, except that your brother made
the unfortunate mistake of marrying me." She did not feel ready to tell
Georgiana that this was much worse than a mere elopement.

Georgiana
looked down and smoothed her skirts. "Anyone can be young and foolish, no
matter how fine their family."

Elizabeth
supposed the girl meant it as comfort. "That is kind of you to say, but I
cannot believe you would ever find yourself in such a situation."

"You
would suppose wrongly, then." Georgiana's voice could scarcely heard.
"Please do not be too vexed with your sister. In all likelihood, she meant
no ill."