Moving Mars (53 page)

I applied swift strokes of sponge to Charless arms and face. He closed his eyes, enjoying my attentions.

Hergesheimer suspended Galena in a sling net. She drifted lowly down and settled. Where are we? he asked.

Where we want to be, Charles said.

What the hell went wrong? Hergesheimer asked.

The QL took us through a bad path, Charles said. It couldnt disengage from some compelling truths. Im sorry. That must not be any explanation at all.

We passed through a different universe? Leander asked.

I dont think so, Charles said. Something to do with changing our geometry, altering boson world-lines. Photons acquired slight mass.

Leander said, Is this something we can understand?

Maybe not, Charles said.

Are we damaged? I mean, permanently, Leander said. He knew the questions to ask Charles, our oracular connection to the QL. I kept my mouth shut and listened. Galena seemed to be asleep. Hergesheimer hung in one apex of the star-shaped chamber, half-visible from where I stood, feet pressing with a pebbles lightness against the floor. The astronomers eyes seemed listless, half-dead.

Photons cut through matter, but not deeply. Only some photons acquired mass. Not complete. Charles looked at me directly, then at Leander. QL doesnt understand. I dont understand. I dont think we should waste time trying now. It wont happen again.

How do you know? Leander asked, bringing himself closer to Charles, staring at him intently.

Because the QL got scared, Charles said. It wont examine those truths again.

We mopped up the droplets of blood as best we could and made new clothes while Hergesheimer worked alone with his instruments. In the tunnel to the shuttle pad, I stopped Leander to ask, Do you know what might be wrong with Galena? Shes still asleep.

Im not sure, he said.

Will she recover?

I hope so.

Can we do what we need to do?

Ask Hergesheimer, Leander said testily. Im worried about getting us back. Charles is exhausted. Were all strung out. Its been four hours already. He tried to break loose from my hand, but my fingers clamped down like talons. He grimaced.

Its all over, isnt it? I said. We cant move Mars.

He swallowed and shook his head, unwilling to face the obvious. Charles says it wont happen again.

The risk, Stephen.

Its horrendous, he admitted, looking away. Horrendous.

Did you expect anything like this?

Of course not.

Hergesheimer dragged himself through the tunnel hand over hand. Not that it matters much, he said, but this goddamned system is ideal. Its everything we thought it might be. The planets are rich with minerals, one is Earth-sized and has a reducing atmosphere but no detectable life Ripe for terraforming. Two prime gas giants. Lovely young asteroids. The star is a long-term variable like the sun. No sign of intelligent lifeno radio chatter. Its beautiful.

He showed me pictures and graphs and strings of numbers on his slate. Sludge-brown Earth-sized planet, very unappetizing; huge blue-green gas giants banded with orange and yellow, rich with hydrogen and deuterium; he had made estimates for the total mass of free minerals and carbonifers and volatiles available in the belt. Rich indeed. He switched the slate off abruptly. To hell with it.

Youve finished? I asked.

No, but the essential work is automatic and should be done in a few minutes.

Margin for error? I asked.

Certainty on broad descriptive grounds. All we could expect, Hergesheimer said. Does it matter, Casseia? Are we ever going to return?

I shook my head. Do it right anyway.

Galenas awake, Hergesheimer said. She doesnt behave.

Beg pardon?

He waggled his fingers in front of his face, stared at me with eyes bulging, accusing, and said, There is no behavior. Shes blank.

Did you see what happened to her? Stephen asked.

She was in the observation blister. Shed pulled back the armor and she was looking outside. I caught a glimpse and turned away. It felt like knives.

That doesnt make any sense, Leander said.

You look at her, then, Hergesheimer said angrily. Talk to her. You pull her out.

When I returned to the control chamber, Charles had unstrapped from his couch and exercised slowly, pressing feet against one wall, hands against an adjacent wall. The optic cables to his head had been disconnected. He turned to me as I came in and said, It truly wont happen again.

Galenas in bad shape, I said. What can we do for her?

Bad information, he said, pressing until he grunted. Bad paths. He floated free and fell slowly to the deck, landing on flexed knees. She took in outside information without prior processing. We saw it through viewers that cant convey the fullness. Shell have to sort it out.

How could what she sees hurt her? I asked.

We assume certain things are true, he said. When we have visual proof they are not true, we become upset.

Hergesheimer says shes totally unresponsive.

Shell just have to find her way back.

I still dont understand.

I have the interpreter modeling a human response to the QLs re-creation of what was outside. Maybe that will tell us more. If we had stayed in that condition more than a few seconds, we would all have ceased to exist.

We cant move Mars, I said. I wont take the responsibility.

It wont happen again. The QL was badly upset. It wont look at those truths again.

My frustration and anger peaked. I will not send my people into a place like that! I dont know what youre talking about, truths and that shit. The QL is too damned unreliable. What if it decides to do something even more dangerous and incomprehensible? Was it experimenting on us?

No, Charles said. It found something it hadnt noticed before. It was a major breakthrough. What it found answers a lot of questions.

Shooting us off into an alternate universe

There are no alternate universes, Charles said. We were in our own universe, with the rules changed.

What does that mean? My breath came in hitches and my hands opened and closed reflexively. I hid my hands behind me, clamping my jaw until my teeth ached.

The QL discovered a new category of descriptors and tweaked one. This category seems to co-respond directly with every other descriptor on the largest scale. Wholeness. The destiny tweak. We changed the way the universe understands itself. Builds itself.

Thats stupid, I said.

I dont understand it yet, myself, Charles said. But I dont deny it.

What happened to the old universe? I demanded.

The new universe couldnt conduct any business. It didnt fit together. Rules contradicted and produced nonsense nature. Everything reverted to the prior rules. We came back.

The whole universe? I folded myself up beside him, hugging my knees. I cant absorb that. I cant take it in, Charles, I said.

I think Galena will be all right in a few hours, Charles said. Her mind will reject what she saw. Shell return to what she was before.

What happens if we touch that descriptor again? I asked.

We wont. If we did, wed get another incomprehensible universe, and it would revert. The problem is for us, for now. The rules of our universe were created by countless combinations and failures. Evolution. Wed have to learn how to design all the rules to interact and make sense. That could take centuries. We dont know anything yet about creating a living universe from scratch.

But we could do it, someday?

Conceivably, Charles said.

The way he looked at me, the way he spokereluctantly, afraid of hurting or disappointing memade me, if such a thing was possible now, even more uneasy. I had been badly frightened just when I thought I was beyond caring for my personal existence.

I wondered what would have happened if we had died before the rules reverted.

Suddenly Charles seemed unspeakably exotic: not human, intellectually monstrous. Can we go back? I asked.

Ill hook up again in a few minutes. The interpreter should be finished and the QL should have sorted itself out. Im sorry, Casseia.

I stared at him owlishly, my neck hair pricking. Why do you always feel the need to apologize to me?

Because I keep shoving bigger and bigger problems on your back, he said. All I really want to do is make things easier for you, take care

Christ, Charles! I unfolded and tried to kick away, but he reached out like a cat and grabbed my ankle, bringing me down in an ungentle arc. I bumped against the chamber floor, but he had saved me from a serious head blow against the ceiling.

With a creeping horror I was immediately ashamed of, I kicked loose.

He shrank back, eyes slitted. Then he returned to his chair and attached the optic cables to his head. By now, he had become expert and did not need any help.

Charles took us home, putting Phobos into its old orbit around Mars, as if nothing had happened. By direct link, we were given a new landing site at Perpetua Station, five hundred kilometers east of Preamble, below the Kaibab plateau.

Charles asked for medical help to be ready to receive Galena Cameron and deactivated the tweaker equipment in preparation for leaving the old Phobos base.

Still ashamed of what had happened earlier, I helped him undo his cables and carry the thinker and interpreter to the shuttle. We said little. Galenas eyes focused on me as Leander and I guided her limp body to the shuttle. She stiffened slightly when we buckled her into her couch, then asked, Have my eyes changed color?

I really did not remember what color her eyes had been, but I said no. Theyre fine, I said.

She shivered. Is Dr. Hergesheimer alive?

Were all fine, Galena, Leander said.

Hergesheimer leaned over her couch, hanging from the top of the passenger compartment. Weve been worried about you.

I dont think Ive been here very long, she said, still shivering. I know I wasnt asleep. Did we get anything?

We got what we went there for, Hergesheimer said. Then, looking at me, he added, It was a wild goose chase. We cant go back.

Because of me? Galena asked, distressed.

No, dear, I said. Not because of you.

Ti Sandra Erzul and the Presidential entourageall those privy to our planscame to Kaibab and Preamble, and Charles, Leander, Hergesheimer and I made our personal presentations in the lab annex. Ti Sandra sat on the left side of the table, flanked by a medical arbeiter and three heavily armed security guards. Twelve kilos lighter than when Id last seen her, the President appeared alert but distant. On the way into the annex, she had said, Ive been close to the reaper, Cassie. Saw his eyes and played a little canasta with him. Dont blame me for being ghost-eyed. I let Hergesheimer speak first. He presented a sadly glowing picture of the new stellar system. Its a beautiful choice, he concluded. A planet placed between these two apopoints, he highlighted points interior and exterior to an elliptical shaded band, would receive enough light and warmth to become a paradise. Even Mars.

Faces became more and more grim as I described the difficulties of the second passage. Ti Sandra shuddered. Charles gives me reassurance that such a thing will never happen again, but I take a more cautious view.

Ti Sandra nodded reluctantly.

Whatever our problems with Earth, in my opinion, we cant take the extreme solution, I concluded. We have to find another way. Leander looked down at the floor and shook his head.

Charles took it calmly. We must have the full confidence of all involved, he said. Ill transfer a technical report on the passages, but I see no need to go into details here. We accomplished what we set out to do. There was a major problem, and it injured all of us, and badly disoriented one of our people. Until this group is fully confident again, I concur with the Vice President.

From most there rose an audible sigh of relief.

I would like more experiments, Ti Sandra said. Eyes turned back to her. How quickly could Mercury travel to an unclaimed asteroid?

To find an asteroid of sufficient size, rendezvous with it Leander mused, and began figuring quickly on his slate.

Two months, Charles said, beating him to the answer. Almost certainly, well need to have our problems with Earth resolved before then.

If theres so little time, Ti Sandra said, the risks of kidnapping a few asteroids might be too extreme. She considered for a moment, weighing the options, and shook her head. No. We cant take the chance.

Charles looked between us, a quiet, chastened little boy.

I cant thank all of you enough, Ti Sandra said quietly.

We feel as if weve failed them, Leander said as the Presidents entourage filed out. Ti Sandra stayed behind. She stood, steadying herself against the table. I approached her and she wrapped her arms around me.

How does it feel to make history? she whispered.

Scary, I whispered back. Parts of it indescribable.

I think Id like to try it sometime, she said, glancing at me conspiratorially. But I agree. Not Mars. Not with things the way they are now.

It was never more than a pipe-dream anyway, Charles said. Was it, Casseia?

I did not know how to answer. Ti Sandra stepped forward, her legs steady but gait slow, and shook their hands. Youve done momentous things, she said, and her resonant voice and motherly manner gave the words impact beyond cliche. Mars can never be grateful enough. She clasped my hands in both of hers, laughed softly, and said, And probably wouldnt be grateful, even it if knew.

It was getting difficult to keep everybody in agreement, Leander admitted.

Its difficult to realize the predicament were in, Ti Sandra said.

The predicament hasnt gone away, Charles said, sitting forward and clasping his hands. Weve learned some interesting things in the past few hours. Theres lots of activity on Earths Moon.

Lieh tells me Terrestrial authorities have taken over Ice Pit Station, Ti Sandra said. What does that mean?

Lets go to the main lab, Charles said. If the President is feeling well enough

Ill last a few more hours, Ti Sandra said. Lead on.

The center of Preamble, the main lab occupied a chamber half a hectare in area, divided by heavy steel curtains into three spaces. The dark gray ceiling arched ten meters over the middle, broken by tracks of focused lighting and life support conduits. The smallest of the spaces was the most important, near the side of the chamber, away from the shielded power supplies. Charles led the way, Leander following. The President and I flanked Leander.