Moving in Rhythm (13 page)

Mark plowed through every red light in his way.

It was only after Lisa had disappeared through the emergency room doors that he felt the speedy tingle of spent adrenaline. He parked the car and jogged toward the hospital. Someone in a white coat flew toward him with a wheelchair.

“What happened?” he demanded.

Mark put a hand out and stopped the man from shoving him into the chair. “No, it’s my sister-in-law, Lisa.”

“You’re bleeding.”

Mark looked down. His shirt sleeve glistened bright red. He touched the stain. It felt wet and cool. Mark gripped the arm of the wheelchair, suddenly dizzy. His stomach churned.

The young man put a hand on his shoulder.

Mark pulled away. “I’m fine. It’s her blood. Where is she? Lisa Apostolos.”

“The pregnant woman?”

Mark nodded.

“They took her in a minute ago. You’ll need to talk to the desk.” And with that the man and the wheelchair disappeared.

Mark had been carrying Lisa’s medical information, insurance cards and even a copy of her birth certificate for weeks. He sat in a hard-backed chair and filled out all the necessary paperwork, trying hard not to think of the blood. Why wasn’t Pete here? For the first time since his brother’s initial call, Mark felt the enormity of his complete inadequacy to the task.

Claire appeared beside him. “They’re prepping her for surgery. There’s a special waiting room.” She glanced down at his shirt. “Maybe you want to go home and change?”

He shook his head. “I’ve got workout clothes in the car. I’ll get them and meet you in the waiting room. If anything happens before then call my cell.”

The surgical waiting room was blue: blue carpet, blue walls, blue chairs. Someone must have thought blue would be soothing. A television in one corner spouted CNN. Besides Claire, the only other occupants were one old and two middle-aged women who were probably mother and daughters. One of the younger women was crying. The mother patted her back and vacantly watched the television.

Mark doubted anyone was taking in the details of the latest congressional scandal. They were all waiting for much more important news.

He dropped into the chair beside Claire.

“She’ll be fine.” Claire patted his hand. “Lots of women have C-sections. It’s probably too common, in fact, but in this case it’s a good thing. The baby is, what, thirty-seven weeks? The risk of complication at that point is pretty minimal. Relax, and quit looking so terrified. You’re going to be an uncle.”

Mark stared at her. “She’s going to have him now?”

Claire gave him a funny look. “Eight-plus months pregnant, contractions, bleeding—what else is she likely to be doing?”

He shook his head. “How am I supposed to know? You’re sure she’ll be okay?”

“Surgery is always risky but yeah, I think she’ll be fine.” She grinned. “Look on the bright side, no more birthing classes.”

He thought it would be hours, but a smiling nurse appeared after about forty-five minutes. “Congratulations, Mr. Apostolos, you’re a father of a beautiful healthy boy.”

He blinked. “Uncle. But thank you. How’s Lisa?”

“She’s doing fine. So far it looks like the baby won’t need special care but we’ll need to keep them here for the next few days. Shall I take you to the room?”

“Told you so.” Claire squeezed his hand. “Give my best to Lisa. Tell her I’ll drop by tomorrow for a visit.”

“Aren’t you coming with me?” Mark stammered.

She shook her head. “This should be a family-only moment.”

* * *

Lisa lay propped in bed, the baby cradled like a football against her breast. Mark stood in the doorway for a moment. She looked groggy but smiled down at her infant like a woman in love. He cleared his throat and she looked up and beamed at him.

“Isn’t he beautiful?”

Mark moved closer and peered at the wrinkled red bundle. Not exactly beautiful. But then his tiny hand uncurled and curled and Mark’s heart burst open.

He grinned at Lisa. “He’ll do.”

Lisa blinked back tears. “I wish Pete was here.”

Mark brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes. “Yeah, me too.”

A nurse appeared. “I’m sorry, Mr. Apostolos, you’re going to have to leave. I mean, if you were the father…”

Lisa giggled. “Can’t win either way, can you? It’s okay. I’ll be sleeping soon. You should go back to the show.”

Mark looked at his watch. “It can’t possibly still be going on.”

Lisa stroked her baby’s head. “Didn’t Claire tell us there was a cast party at the brew pub downtown?”

Mark shook his head. “I can’t go there.”

Lisa looked up. “Why on earth not? We were invited.”

“It’s complicated.”

She gave him an exasperated look. “It’s not complicated. Just tell him how you feel. He’s a fool if he’s not interested.”

Mark gaped at her.

She grimaced. “Why does everyone think I’m stupid?”

“But how?”

“Well, you’ve been mooning around the apartment, ducking into your room whenever your phone rang, so I knew something was up. Then it stopped and you started moping.” She smiled at him a little sheepishly. “I looked in the contact list of your phone. You only have three personal numbers—our home, Claire’s and Seth’s. It didn’t take a rocket scientist. I’ll admit I was surprised but I got over it. I thought you might tell me if I kept ribbing you about women, but you didn’t.” She shrugged. “And then I watched you stare at him with goo-goo eyes all through his dance.”

“I didn’t.”

She nodded. “You did. So go do something about it.” She glared past him and said, “Do you have a problem with my gay brother-in-law?”

Mark turned to see the nurse blush and stammer. He grinned at Lisa, who winked and shooed him out of the room.

A shower and change of clothes later, Mark waded through the clutch of smokers at the door to Bailey’s brew pub. He pushed his way through the door and into the small vestibule lined with vintage beer advertisements, framed baseball card displays and ferns.

A hostess, who couldn’t have been more than nineteen, beamed a gracious, vacant smile. “Table for one?”

He shook his head. “I’m looking for the dance cast party?”

Her smile morphed into something more real. She nodded toward a stairway. “They’re upstairs, first alcove on the left.”

Mark nodded his thanks and climbed the stairs, his heart thumping double-time. It felt like he was in one of those science fiction movies where the hero ascends a flight of stairs and finds himself in some sort of alien world. He imagined at the top he’d step into something like the bar in
Star Wars
, with colorful creatures sporting way too many appendages. What he found instead was an ordinary restaurant with average-looking people eating and laughing at tables and booths. At the far end a low wall separated the restaurant and bar area, where a band was setting up.

Mark found the dancers and their friends in an alcove off the main room. Some clustered around a buffet table while others stood in small groups, sipping beverages and laughing. He stood for a moment at the edge of the crowd. Inhaled raggedly. There was no way he could step into that swarm of bodies.

He was about to spin on his heel and leave when he spotted Seth across the room, tall and beautiful, the center of attention in a small circle of laughing happy people. Sweat broke out on Mark’s brow as he stepped forward, pressing his way through the crowd. His heart pounded. People’s voices seemed louder inside the alcove, but he couldn’t make sense of any of it. He squeezed between two people standing almost back to back, excused himself, closed his eyes, took a deep breath and opened them to find Seth standing before him.

“You’re here. How’s Lisa? That was quite a dramatic exit you all made.” Seth extended a hand to touch Mark’s shoulder.

Mark grabbed his hand and held it tightly. “Yeah, sorry for the disruption. Lisa’s fine. And the baby is too. Everyone’s fine. I, um, I, can we talk?”

Seth smiled. “Yeah, of course.” He led Mark toward an empty corner.

Mark trailed after him, gripping Seth’s hand like a lifeline.

Seth turned to face him. “Afraid this is the most privacy we’re likely to get.” He moved to pull his hand away but Mark held fast. He knew he’d never get it out if he wasn’t touching Seth. Seth cocked an eyebrow and waited.

“Would it be a problem if I kissed you here?” Mark asked softly, his eyes riveted on Seth’s lower lip.

Seth looked past him to the room of people. “I think there’d be a certain shock value in it. And people will think you’re gay.”

“I am gay.”

Seth grinned. “I like a man who’s sure of himself. Still, I’m not sure we want to be the talk of Lacland just yet.”

Mark met his gaze. “Right. It’s only that I was thinking it might make it easier for me to say what I want to say if I kissed you first.”

Something flashed in Seth’s eyes. “Follow me.”

Seth led him out of the alcove, down the steps, past the smiling hostess and the smokers, into a tiny alley and behind a pungent dumpster.

“Not exactly romantic.” Mark kicked at an empty soup can.

Seth shrugged. “Best I can do on short notice. You want candlelight, you have to call ahead.”

Mark ran his thumb along Seth’s jaw. “If I’d called ahead would you have wanted me?”

Seth turned his head, catching Mark’s thumb in his teeth. He released it with a kiss. “Yes.”

Mark cradled the back of Seth’s neck and pulled him down. Their lips met and he poured his heart into the kiss, telegraphing passion and admiration and, yes, love. Seth’s hands dug into his back as he pressed back into him. The smell of rotting garbage, the furtiveness of an alleyway, reminded Mark of nights pressing against strangers. But this was Seth, beautiful, intelligent, sexy Seth, the only person to push through Mark’s wall of craziness. His tongue tasted of wine and his mouth felt like the most exciting and safest place Mark had ever known.

He broke the kiss.

Seth collapsed back against the brick wall of the restaurant, his gaze warm. “You know how to get a man’s attention.”

“I love you.” Mark blurted. He focused on the top button of Seth’s shirt, ran a hand through his hair. “Christ. I’m not good at this. I’m a fucked-up mess and you should run away. But I’m hoping like hell you don’t. I know there’s no way you’re going to feel like that for me, I mean you’d be crazy to, but I—”

Seth touched Mark’s chin, tipping his head until he was forced to look into his eyes. Even in the darkened alley Seth’s gaze looked hot. “So I’m crazy.”

And then his lips were on Mark’s again. This time in a kiss so tender it melted the tension from Mark’s shoulders and dissolved the knot in his stomach.

He pulled away. “Please don’t mess with me, Seth. I’ve never trusted anyone, not like this. And I want to, I really want to let myself believe you. But if this is some kind of extension of the thing you do with dogs…”

Seth cocked his head. “I’ve never had sex with a dog. Besides, you’re not a greyhound, Mark. You’re a bulldog, tough and wary, loyal as all get-out. Not easy to get close to, and you know, that intrigued me. But once inside what do I find but this huge heart. I’d be the crazy one to walk away from you.” He grinned. “And by the way, you should hope it’s an extension of my dog thing. I make long-term commitments to my greyhounds.”

Mark blinked at him. “So we’re going to do this?”

Seth answered with a kiss. When they broke again he whispered, “I need to take you home with me. Can you do that?”

Mark grinned. “Um, I was hoping you’d ask. Belle’s in the car.”

* * *

Mark parked near Seth’s apartment, clipped on Belle’s leash and walked her down the block while he waited for Seth, who had ducked back into the party to say his goodbyes. Someone had mowed the grass in front of Seth’s building and Mark inhaled the sweet green smell. A chill breeze ruffled Belle’s hair but Mark felt flushed and shaky. Chaos theory indicated that slight deviations in the origin of an action led to huge changes in the trajectory. Now it felt like the world had tilted and Mark was flying off in an entirely new direction. On his way to the party he’d told himself that the best he could expect was another night with Seth. It looked like he was getting that and more.

He watched the headlights of passing cars. Hard to know in the dark which one would be Seth’s. Mark felt different. He suddenly realized what it was. At this very moment he wasn’t afraid. No constriction in his chest, no clenched stomach or pounding heart. It was impossible to believe it wouldn’t come back, but how glorious to feel relaxed and whole for one golden moment on a late-spring evening, walking his dog and waiting for his lover.

A car pulled up to the curb and Seth climbed out. Mark sprinted toward him, Belle trotting along beside.

Seth smiled. “Sorry, that took longer than I’d hoped. Everyone’s pleased with opening night.”

Mark followed him up the steps. “Everything went well after I left?”

Seth paused with his hand on the doorknob. “Yeah, fine. Let’s give the dogs a minute to get used to each other in this space.”

Mark followed him in, holding Belle on a short leash. It took some time but soon enough Belle quit trying to get Freddie to play and Freddie relaxed enough to ignore her.

Seth flopped onto the couch beside Freddie. “So what happened with Lisa?”

Mark sank down beside him. “It was pretty scary. There was lots of blood, but it all turned out well.” He gave a quick summary of the night’s events, ending with Lisa’s admonition to go out and get his man, which led him to tell Seth about Pete too.

Seth ran a hand through Mark’s hair and down the back of his neck. “Coming out is a difficult thing.”

He smiled, resting his hand on Seth’s thigh. “I actually thought it would be worse. Somehow I pictured everyone screaming and crying and running away. Maybe they would have earlier. My father wouldn’t have liked it, but Lisa and Pete seem grateful I’m something, not the Unibomber-type hermit they thought I’d end up.”

Seth pulled Mark to him. “You can be a hermit as long as you let me in your cave.”

A rush of desire coursed through him and Mark buried his head in Seth’s neck, inhaling the smell of him, sweat and soap. He kissed a hungry line from his ear to his clavicle. Traces of stage makeup flecked Seth’s neck. Mark licked at one. It tasted like chalk. “Can we go to bed now?”

“Oh, yes.” Seth led Mark to the bed, each man shedding clothes along the way. Seth stopped at the edge of the bed and turned toward Mark, beautiful and hard in his nakedness.

Mark reached for him, pulling him into a full-body kiss, the kind that starts at the toes and works its way up through thighs pressed together, to the crest of hip against hip, cocks brushing against each other, nipples brushing chest hair and arms wrapped, hands wandering, all the way up to tongues and minds and hearts.

They collapsed onto the bed, lying on their sides. Mark looked into Seth’s amazing eyes. There was nothing to fear there. He touched his shoulder and trailed a hand down his chest, grazing a nipple, which stood to attention. He leaned to kiss it, the swirl of hair around Seth’s nipple tickling his lips. He smoothed Seth’s abdomen with the back of his hand, caressing the soft line of hair that ran down from his belly button.

Seth’s breath quickened, loud in the silent room.

Mark pulled back to look at him. “When I saw you onstage tonight I thought I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life.”

“Thank you.” Seth’s hands felt warm stroking Mark’s back. “After my injury I had to learn a new way of dancing, one that doesn’t involve jumps or spins.”

“Hmmm.” Mark ran his finger along the line of Seth’s hip bone. “Change. It’s supposed to be good.”

Seth’s breath was warm on his cheek. “Sometimes it is.”

Mark’s fingers grazed the wet tip of Seth’s cock. “I’ve been thinking about what we talked about on the phone that night.”

Seth inhaled sharply. “Me too.”

He ran a finger down Seth’s cock and touched the soft skin of his balls. “You are that special guy, you know.”

Seth smiled. “I was hoping you’d say that.” He pulled Mark’s face toward him, capturing his mouth in another soul-wrenching kiss.

Mark opened to Seth’s tongue, reveling in the taste of him. He let Seth roll him onto his back, his whole being screaming to surrender, to let Seth into every part of him. Seth groaned. Mark’s own cock throbbed in rhythm with the pulse of Seth’s against his thigh.

He reached to touch Seth, who held his wrist. “Don’t,” Seth whispered. “I’m too close as it is.” He rolled away from Mark and rummaged in a drawer by the bed.

Mark lay back, riveted by the beauty of the long muscles moving under Seth’s pale skin. He breathed deeply, trying to calm himself, ready himself for what was coming. The sheets smelled of sleep and sweat.

Finally Seth rolled back toward him, his smile warm. He tossed a condom and lube onto the bed beside him. Seth ran a hand along Mark’s jaw. “You’re beautiful, you know?”

Mark snorted. He searched Seth’s eyes for irony but didn’t find any. Finally he whispered, “I’m glad you think so.”

Seth ran his hand down Mark’s chest. He shivered at his touch then jumped when Seth’s hand grazed his cock, which felt full and tight.

Seth leaned in to whisper in Mark’s ear, his hot breath sending ripples all the way down to Mark’s cock. “I’ll try to go slow but I want you so badly.”

Mark groaned, arching toward him. He felt like begging but instead simply spread his legs. Seth inhaled sharply and moved to kneel between his bent knees. Seth’s gaze held Mark’s. He heard the crackle of a condom wrapper, followed by the snap of latex.

Mark closed his eyes, overwhelmed and embarrassed by how much he wanted Seth inside him.

“Mark, look at me.”

His gaze connected with Seth’s and the connection jolted him. There was nothing cool or detached about the way Seth was looking at him. Seth ran his hands down Mark’s inner thighs, pressing them apart. He looked at Mark, his eyes caressing every inch.

Sweat beaded on Mark’s forehead as he watched Seth squeeze lube onto his fingers and rub them together. Again Seth’s eyes met his. Mark licked his lips and spread his knees wide, watching Seth’s eyes dilate at the movement. Mark closed his eyes, concentrating on the sweet sensation of fingers making tiny circles around his ass. He inhaled deeply and tried to relax on the exhale. One and then another digit slipped in, the movement exquisite. The fingers reached in farther and Mark felt a jolt when they touched his prostate.

His eyes flew open and met Seth’s gaze. Seth smiled. His focus never leaving Mark’s face, he withdrew his fingers. Mark could hear the slick of lube against latex and then he felt the pressure of Seth’s cock against his ass. He clenched shut in a moment of panic.

Seth waited.

Mark grabbed his own knees, relaxing into the stretch of his hip opening up, willing his muscles to relax. Seth rubbed Mark’s ass with the tip of his cock, sending electrical sparks of excitement through him. He looked down to see Seth poised outside him. His own cock dripped precome onto his rigid belly. He nodded to Seth, who pushed in slowly, watching Mark’s face, pausing to let the burn dissolve and the muscles relax.

And then he was in and Mark pushed against him, wanting and needing, and they were rocking together. Seth’s hand pumped Mark’s cock in rhythm with his own. Mark arched into him, gripping Seth’s ass and pulling him in deeper and deeper. The headboard rocked against the wall with each thrust and the sound made it better, like an announcement:
Seth is fucking Mark. Seth is fucking Mark.
Seth above him, thrusting into him again and again.

Mark felt consumed, surrounded, taken. The sound of Seth’s breath, the smell of his sweat, the touch of his hand and most wonderfully the miracle of his cock stretching Mark, opening him, moving into him completely.

Seth said his name once, twice, and thrust deeply, holding and pumping into his ass and Mark tumbled after him, splashing both their chests in long, arching spasms. Seth collapsed on top of him. They lay for a moment catching their breath.