Monsters & Fairytales (64 page)

“It’s okay. It’s okay!” He said, waving his hands in front of him.

Spike dropped the Frisbee instantly at my feet. The guy smiled. Why wasn’t that good enough? Why couldn’t the animals save us? That’d be too easy. Of course they were pure.

“I’m sorry.” I said as I picked it up and handed it to him.

“No, that’s sort of cool. I kind of always wanted to play Frisbee with a dog. You know, you see it on television and stuff and you think, man that’d be cool!” The guy laughed.

“Yeah.
Yeah I guess you do.” I smiled.

“I’m Marc, with a ‘c’.”

He held out his hand immediately after silence struck. His grin made my face blush and I found my head trying to gather a distraction. When it clicked he had made sure I knew how his name was spelled, that eased the flush in my cheeks.

“Mira with a ‘belle’ on the end.”

I went with it. I didn’t know why, but I went with it. I shook his hand and smiled back.

“Nice.
Mirabelle.
I like it.”

He laughed and dug his hands in his pocket with the Frisbee under his arm. Spike was staring at it, waiting for him to drop it as if it were food.

“Thank you. I like Marc with a ‘c’ as well.
Unique.”

Someone whistled and we looked up. His friends were watching us. They threw their hands up to emphasize their impatience. I kind of wished that Marc would have chucked the Frisbee at them, but that was selfish of me. Selfishness was something I was trying to avoid.

“Oh, sorry.
It was nice to meet you. Maybe I’ll catch you and Spike around here again?”

“Yeah!”

I waved him off as he two seconds too late chucked the Frisbee at the friend that had whistled at him. His friend was good. He caught it and immediately spun it back at Marc. He duck and caught it, making sure to see if I had noticed. I had indeed noticed. I smiled.

“Nice guy.” Sebastian said when Marc had left.

I had forgotten he was there. He startled me slightly. I wanted to swat at him, but then he’d know he was getting to me. The whole point was that he wanted to get at me. However, I was certain, whether I cared or not, Sebastian was going to tell me what he had to say.

“Like, really nice? Or just, okay nice?” I played into him.

“Like, really nice.” He admitted.

He didn’t want to, but he did. I respected him for that.

“Maybe animals are the answer.” I whispered.

I looked to my four-legged best friend. He lifted his eyebrows and stuck his tongue out.
Perfection.
He was born pure and never faltered. Most animals, but especially my biased opinion that dogs primarily knew unconditional love, were made to fill that void in our hearts. They were our answer. He was the answer. He had been there all along.

“I think I understand it. You’re creating a wave, Mirabelle. Everyone you come into contact with wants to be better. You’re their push.” Sebastian mumbled.

I followed his gaze to where he was looking. Over where the
stream of bubbles were
wandering to the sky, the family was together now. The father was not on his cell phone, but something told me he wasn’t going to be on it for a while. His hands were full of his wife and they watched their two little boys eat watermelon slices. All because the father saw his boys hug a dog a way they had never hugged him, he saw everything he was missing out on with them. He started reminiscing and vowing to be there for them, his family.

Water splashing took me back to the old couple. They were no longer sitting, but they were still together. I watched them for a few minutes try to scheme a way to get the other one splashed, until the husband kicked off his shoes and stepped into the fountain. He had one foot in, and his wife covered her gaping mouth. He looked around checking for the coast to be clear. When he recognized Spike and I, a ‘thank-you’ nod was sent in our direction. He charged at his baffled wife and grabbed her. She screamed in joy. Dipping her carefully, he kissed her, sailor returning home style. Spike had encouraged them to be free and enjoy the little things.

People were changing. They were proving their potential and capability to be pure again! I had done it.

“It’s working!” I belted out.

My excitement got the best of me. Adrenaline was coursing through me. I wanted to do more good. I wanted to influence more people. There had to be something that set off a big enough chain
reaction
to make the Zahn see the good. I had to be stronger.

“It might not work. You only give them the want to do well. They have to change on their own.” He said.

“Why are you so set on me leaving here? Are you really that selfish? Isn’t it against your nature?” I asked.

“It’s reality. This could take years. The future is untold, except that the end is definite.”

“You don’t know that. I could help them!”

“This is hopeless.” He said.

He touched my hand and a spark ignited inside of me.

“What kind of savior are you if you give up hope yourself?”

There was steam coming out of my ears. He just looked at me without so much as blinking. His eyes seemed to fade. I couldn’t bear looking at him anymore. People were watching us. He was trying to reverse this. He wasn’t helping me. Could God see that? Could the Zahn comprehend it was Sebastian dragging everything down and not what should be?

“All I have to do is trust my heart.” I said closing my eyes and breathing in deep.

“What’s it saying then?” He snapped.

“You’re the one that can read it.”

“It wants hope; you want a reason to believe this is worth saving.”

“I know they are worth saving.”

I opened up my eyes and scanned the park.

“No, us.”

He stepped in front of me. He was pleading with me now.

“You keep distracting me on purpose. I know you love me, I know I want to be with you, but there isn’t much time left, Sebastian.”

“We don’t know how much time there is.”

“If I did have a lot of time left, I’m sure you guys wouldn’t have gotten me when you did.” I smirked.

“We didn’t get you, remember? You found your way to us.” He said.

I thought about that for a second. Then I knew everything that I had been running towards, every answer I wanted, everything was so simple. Earth would be saved by my sacrifice and my sacrifice alone. That was what Loki, the Minakai, and of course, my mother had all been saying all along. They were right, I was being so selfish. It was just that, I
just wanted to prove life had worth so I wouldn’t reach that one moment that every single human being in the entire world feared the most; death.

Nobody wanted to die. We all want to live forever. That’s how this got clouded in the first place. First we tried to stop the fear and the thought of eternal darkness by cushioning the blow. We created this world after death that wasn’t dark, t hat wasn’t a void. Instead, it was eternal bliss. And rather than just accept that anyone can attain this bliss, we pushed that there had to be a specific path so much that the actual concept was lost. It became about power and greed, not the hearts of lost, terrified souls.

It would be simple if it had only been the churches that created this vision, but even scientists and doctors worked to try to find alternative ways to life. From the first time they created medicines to prolong life, to the very second we were living; they have been trying so many methods to extend something someone can’t even do right the first time. Why should they deserve a second chance if God can’t even find reason to their first? Me.
             
             
I knew it all along, but I was doing it for the wrong reasons. If I can’t even die myself, who am I to say I’m even worth the eternal heavens? Why should they walk through the Zahn for me? It was time now. My answer was so obvious. I had to do it for them. I would give them the hope that I was so afraid of. Their second chance could be their first. People could live by my sacrifice, the modern day Jesus. Would they even know what I had done?

Sebastian was my soul mate. He and I had a connection long before the other even existed. We were created to fulfill this destiny. I couldn’t have done it without him. Even though it seemed he was just standing in my way, he’s what gave me sight. I was so willing to give everything up to avoid a human life, the one every other normal human lives, that I was afraid of fear itself.

Wanting to fall to my knees, I felt the betrayal of my own path on the innocence of the world. There was never a moment I was 100% dedicated to giving them a chance. I did it to avoid the guilt. I had wanted everything to fail so I could be forced into the eternity without anything but him. Sebastian was my light in the darkness. He hadn’t been doing anything wrong. It was all me. I was influencing myself negatively. I was the lie. That’s why the Zahn hadn’t come yet. That’s why Sebastian came back with me. I had to give him up. If I could make that change then the rest of the world stood a chance. It was the only key to defeating the Zahn. My
heart felt
stronger.

“Mirabelle, you’re crazy.”

Sebastian was getting anxious. He was pacing all around.

“No, I’m not.”

“Please, don’t do this. We can have it all. You proved that they are not worth it. You saw it.”

He bent down and wrapped his arms around my waist. His head was pressed into my chest. He was shaking.

Just like when I had cried into my mother, the world started changing around us. I saw it this time as it happened. No one else seemed to notice. It was too late. I had done it. The Zahn was coming.

“You’re blinded. That’s not the way it was meant to be. You know that.” I said.

“
This can’t be it, it can’t.” He begged.

“Then how come it is?” I smiled.

I knelt down with him and I looked him in his eyes.

“It’s going to be okay. I will never leave you, in here.” I said, touching his temple.

“That’s not good enough!” He screamed, pushing me away from him.

He stood up and stared at me. I was on my elbows, watching him decide his next move. Sitting back up, I reached for him.

“It’s the only way.” I whispered.

Everything was frozen inside of me. I couldn’t feel the pain I knew was there. It was all in my head. He was my sacrifice. My heart, the chance to love the way I was made to, I had to give it up for the world to be happy. They deserved that, I knew it now.

“I can’t.”

Sebastian took at step towards me when an unseen force turned him around. Carlyle was there with the Zahn on his back. Its blue ice drooled everywhere.

“You will.” Carlyle said.

“No! You can’t tell me that.” Sebastian hissed.

“Brother, she has made her decision. She has figured out the way. You must accept her words.” Carlyle soothed his brothers’ wounds.

“She doesn’t understand.”

“Yes, she knows everything. Will you just look at the surroundings?!” Carlyle hissed back.

Tossing his brother off of him, Sebastian lunged at me. He was on all fours in front of me.

“Mirabelle, the one thing you want is me. I’m your happy ending. I’m the answer to it all.” Sebastian whispered in a way that told me he wasn’t asking he was telling.

“There’s no such thing as monsters winning the happy ending in a fairytale. You know that.”

It made sense. They didn’t exist. If this did exist, then the other would have to, too. And for the fairytale to work, I’d be getting him. It was a conundrum. It was a dream for little girls to get by that needed that ending. The problem was that so many people were holding on to something they could never reach that they were missing out on everything they had. I had it all here. They couldn’t tell me, though. To prove my worth, I had to figure it out on my own. And I did. It might’ve have taken me a few falls, but I made it to where I was supposed to be.

“Then where is your happy ending?”
Sebastian tried to muster with any ounce of courage and pride he had left in him.

Carefully standing up, Sebastian placed his hands on my cheeks and pulled me up with him. We were moving in slow motion. I could feel his breath on my lips. We were inches apart. I felt the tiniest part of his lips tickle mine,
but I knew they’d never touch again.
I wanted to melt. I looked into his eyes and, without saying a word, pleaded that he stopped this torture. His eyes were darting back and forth into mine, helpless. His breathing sped up and that’s when I knew it was working, he couldn’t read me anymore. I had done it.

“Right here, where I belong.”
I said after knowing I had the capability to lie to him now.

I had to lie to him. It took every last ounce of courage I had left in me to stare into those maroon eyes and convince him I was telling the truth. He was broken. I had broken him. I had to be strong. This was the only way.

A snap made me jump. There was a teal fuzzy oval just to the right of Carlyle. The Zahn had left an exodus behind.
Was that it? Was the trial from the Zahn my ability to turn Sebastian down? Was my test of judgment how strong I could be as the man I loved held me so close and I took a step back?
I looked to Carlyle for some sign of confirmation. He smiled at me then put his hand back on Sebastian’s shoulder. I forced my smile in all of the confusion and in that moment, I felt happy. Carlyle had done so much for me. He knew we were going to be okay. It settled my stomach.