Mistletoe Mansion (31 page)

‘Oh my God,’ I said. ‘So how long have you been seeing him?’

‘Long enough to know how bored he is with Melissa. I make him feel young again.’

‘Melissa’s hardly drawing her pension.’

‘She’s thirty next year.’ Saffron shuddered.

‘He bought her those boobs, you know.’ I looked pointedly at her flat chest.

‘Not nothing wrong with that. Anyway, Jonny says I’m perfect.’

I stared at the cut-out photos in the drawer.

‘Don’t think you’re any better than me,’ said Saffron. ‘I saw the way you handled Melissa’s fine china and admired the golden birdcage. You and me, we both want fancy stuff like that. Other people have managed it, like the contestants off Big Brother. That’s all I’ve wanted ever since I can remember – nice things; people to know who I am; the paparazzi to take my photo. Remember Stella out of Sleeping Booty and Ashley out of Vajazzlers Versus Vets? Then there was Tracy out of Look-a-Like Lock-Up
…
They’re all famous now.’

I squirmed. She was right. For years I’d craved that kind of life. ‘But wouldn’t it be better to become famous by achieving something, with a great voice, or business idea or sports skill?’

She swivelled her petite body. ‘I’ve got the skills to get Jonny to marry me. He’s done it twice already – proves he believes in the institution of marriage. I’ve tried the clubs in London where footballers hang out, but there’s too much competition there to hook anyone really well-known. Then I met Steve. I thought his golf was stupid until he talked about Jonny. It got me thinking. Golfers – they’re the new footballers, take it from me, babes.’

‘But you’re engaged!’

Saffron sneered. ‘Steve’s just a stepping stone.’

My mouth fell open.

‘Do you really thing I’d waste this body on someone who worked in an office?’ she said. ‘He’s lucky to have had a girl like me on his arm for a few months. It’s a win win situation for both of us. I done nothing wrong.’

I shook my head, stood up.

‘I was shortlisted to appear on Blonde, Blingin’ and Beautiful last year, you know?’

Ignoring her, I opened the bedroom door.

‘She won’t appreciate you telling her,’ said Saffron, following me. ‘Not nothing going to be achieved by that. You wouldn’t want to hurt Steve, would you?’

I hurried downstairs, along the hallway and into the kitchen. The music was louder than ever. Quickly I packed away the cakestands and empty plastic boxes and slipped on my gold parka jacket.

‘Aren’t you going to wash those plates up before you go,’ said Saffron in a tight voice. She stood at the kitchen door, clutching her phone. Her hand shook.

‘Goodbye Saffron.’ I pushed past her and stopped at the front door to open it.

‘I’m just trying to make something of myself,’ she shouted above the R&B beat.

I swung around and glared. ‘By sleeping with someone else’s husband? How clever is that?’

Saffron folded her arms. ‘It’s her fault. She shouldn’t keep nagging him about having kids. Jonny’s life is busy enough. He’s a star. Melissa ought to remember she’d be a nobody without him. Not nothing she does makes him feel like a man anymore.’

‘Is that what he told you? They’re still sleeping together, you know? I saw them, my first night in the cul-de-sac. It was pretty wild by the looks of it…’

‘He don’t love her anymore,’ Saffron snapped.

‘But you can’t split them up! The Winsfords… they’re a brand.’ I lowered my voice. ‘Saffron – it’ll tear Melissa apart.’

She snorted. ‘And what about me? Don’t I deserve a taste of the good life? I want the best beauty treatments, exotic holidays abroad. I want a tan that comes from a far-away island, not a bottle. I want people to stare at me in the street. A life like that would be mental.’

Everything stood still for a moment and an uneasy sensation shifted in my stomach. That speech sounded so familiar. Saffron sounded just like me.

‘Don’t tell me you wouldn’t do anything for a bit of the celebrity lifestyle,’ she crowed.

‘I don’t break up marriages to achieve my goals,’ I said. ‘I work bloody hard at my business. And what do you think Jonny’s going to do when
you
approach thirty and start using Botox – that’s assuming you’re still together.’

‘I bet you’re not this critical of your new best friend Melissa,’ she sneered.

‘Melissa’s nothing like you. She never even knew he was famous when they first got together,’ I muttered.

‘Then she don’t deserve him.’ Saffron’s eyes narrowed. ‘Any woman with half a brain does her research before giving a bloke the glad eye. I don’t waste my assets on just anyone.’

With a sigh I pulled open the front door and, bags and cakestands bumping against my legs, hurtled down the drive. Music poured out of the house, onto the quiet dark road. I crossed to my car, unlocked it and threw my stuff in the boot. Ignoring Saffron’s high-pitched insults, I got in the front seat and drove off.

Five minutes later, several streets away, my heart still raced. Listening to her… It was like someone playing back the speeches I’d made to Adam over the last few months. Shallow, materialistic… A surge of heat filled my face.

‘Watch where you’re going, bimbo!’ shouted a voice as a pair of headlights screeched out of Badgers Chase. I swerved, pulled up and just caught the outline of a Bugatti. My mouth went dry. One guess as to where Jonny was going.

Chest tightening, I parked at Mistletoe Mansion before dragging my feet towards the Winsfords’ place. I really didn’t want to go in, but I’d promised to call on Melissa and give her the low-down on my evening. Nervously, I rapped the eagle knocker, kind of hoping that no one would answer. But no such luck. The door opened and there stood Melissa, in a gorgeous pink tracksuit. Should I tell her about her husband’s affair? My stomach scrunched into a ball. How could I? It would devastate my celebrity friend and knock that already fragile confidence. Yet if I didn’t, Jonny was making a fool of her. She deserved the truth.

‘She’s in here, Kimmy darling,’ said Melissa, and puzzled, I followed her into her lush lounge. Ah. There was Jess, perched on the plum sofa. The velvet red curtains were pulled and on the coffee table fragrant candles burned, next to bowls of potpourri.

‘I did leave a note for you,’ said Jess.

‘Listen to you two – you’re like an old married couple,’ said Melissa. Her eyes looked a bit red. Her voice sounded quieter than usual.

‘Melissa insisted I come round,’ continued Jess. ‘For these magazines…’ She lifted one up. It had a photo of a naked pregnant woman on the front page.

‘Champagne?’ Melissa said to me as she headed back to the hallway. ‘I’ve done my best to stick to non-alcoholic drinks with the pregnant lady around. But seeing as you’re here I may as well indulge myself. Then you can tell me all about sulky Saffron and how her hen party went.’ She beckoned to me and I darted back into the hallway. ‘How are you?’ she said, in low tones. ‘After this morning?’

‘I’m fine,’ I said, stomach even tighter than before. Melissa’s concern made me almost reveal her husband’s affair then and there. Yet I couldn’t bear to see her hurt. Perhaps, instead, I should have a word with Jonny – tell him if he didn’t ‘fess up, I’d do it for him…

With a feeble smile, I exchanged looks with my glamorous pal. Melissa understood. I didn’t want to talk about Luke. Not yet. Whilst she got the drinks, I went back into the lounge and sat down next to Jess. ‘Didn’t think you liked our golfing friend that much,’ I whispered.

Jess tucked a strand of red hair behind her ear. ‘She’s okay, actually. Did you know there’s a compost bin at the bottom of her garden? And she orders her make-up from the same online company as me, the one that only uses natural products.’ At the end of her cold now, Jess wiped her nose. ‘I feel sorry for her – look at all this stuff Melissa’s collected to do with babies. She’s decided to put her pregnancy plans on hold and has given me a bucket- load of folic acid tablets.’

‘You’d think she wouldn’t want to talk about babies, what with Jonny dragging his feet.’

‘I know. She’s like an encyclopaedia when it comes to information about getting pregnant – did you know the first ever contraceptive used in Ancient Egypt was crocodile dung?’

I pulled a face. ‘Just the smell would be enough, like that fertiliser you sell. Talking of which, how was work today?’ I said, dying to tell Jess about Saffron, but worried Melissa might overhear.

‘I told Dana – about… my condition.’

‘Oh my God – did the Dalek threaten to exterminate you?’

‘It was dead weird. She didn’t say much; asked me about the father.’

‘That’s a bit of a cheek! Did you tell her?’

‘No point in hiding it. The rest of the staff heard I’d broken up with my boyfriend, although they didn’t know he was married. When Dana found out I was going to be on my own, she started muttering about maternity leave; wanted to know if I’d be going back to work.’

‘And what did you say?’

‘Yes. I mean, somehow…’

I squeezed her hand. ‘We’ll sort it out.’

Jess half-smiled. ‘So. How was the hen party? Oh yes, and I must tell you about poor Melissa. You see–’

‘Here – this is top stuff,’ said Melissa, appearing with two glasses full of champagne. ‘One of the sponsors gave it to Jonny.’

I took my glass as Melissa collapsed into an armchair, opposite.

‘Was that him I saw, just now, zooming off in his car?’ I asked, innocently.

‘One minute he was playing darts, the next he shouted something about needing to check a rota at the club and vanished.’ She bit her lip.

‘What’s the matter?’ I asked softly. ‘He was going pretty fast. That’s why I came round – to check everything was all right.’

‘Nothing… Everything…’ Her voice sounded kind of strangled. ‘He’s furious. But it’s not my fault.’ She looked at Jess who nodded. ‘I mean, I’ve got to trust some people. I can’t go through life thinking the worst of every person I meet.’

‘What’s happened?’

‘My agent contacted me. He’d had a call from a friend of his, a guy who works at Infamous. Word’s got around that someone’s sold a story on me. It’s hitting the shelves tomorrow morning.’

‘Who?’

Melissa’s chin wobbled. ‘I can’t believe… How could she…?’

‘Sandra,’ said Jess. ‘You met her, didn’t you, Kimmy?’

‘
Sandra
?’ I put down my glass. That warm, cosy, mumsy woman I’d met at Melissa’s coffee morning, who did Botox and nails? ‘No way! There’s got to be some mistake.’

Melissa swigged back her drink. ‘All this interest in these photos of Jonny and that blonde… Sandra’s obviously been waiting and has decided this is a good time to earn some bucks. Come to think of it, she recently mentioned how much she wanted a conservatory but couldn’t afford it.’ Her chin wobbled. ‘Apparently she’s said all sorts of things about me drinking and how she regularly has to chauffeur me around – that happened once! Then there’s everything I’ve told her about how much I want a baby. Plus my cosmetic procedures and all the inside gossip I’ve given her about the other golfers’ wives…’ Melissa gulped. ‘I feel like a teenager who’s just had her diary stolen. I thought we were friends.’

‘What a bitch,’ I said. ‘Can’t you sue? Get… what do you call it… an injunction? Stop the article going to press?’

Melissa shrugged. ‘Jonny reckons we wouldn’t have a leg to stand on because there’s probably some truth in what she’s revealed. I trusted her.’ Tears travelled down the contours of her perfect cheekbones. ‘Jonny can’t believe I’ve been so stupid.’

My fists curled. What a cheek when he’d been so stupid, with Saffron, himself.

‘You’d think Jonny would be more sympathetic,’ I said. ‘People must have done the dirty on him.’

She nodded. ‘I reminded him of how foolish he’d been a couple of years ago, when his mum was ill.’

‘Cancer, wasn’t it?’ I said.

‘Yes. When the papers announced it, she hadn’t even had time to tell her best friend.’

‘That’s awful,’ said Jess.

‘Some journos hacked Jonny’s phone. It was easy to tap into his voicemail because he’d chosen an obvious password. Me messing up has just brought it all back and made him feel bad again.’ She sniffed. ‘Anyway, darling, distract me. Tell me all about Saffron – and the buffet. Was there anything to eat apart from cottage cheese and low-fat crackers?’

‘Where does this Sandra woman live?’ I said, hardly listening. ‘Let’s go round. I’ll pretend to be your lawyer. We could threaten all sorts. Tell her that… that by the time she’s been through the courts, she won’t be able to afford a cardboard box to sit in, let alone a conservatory.’

‘Please, Kimmy,’ she said in a small voice. ‘I… I won’t hold it together if I think about it anymore. You know what it’s like…’ She stared at me. ‘Sometimes things are too painful to talk about.’

Wasn’t that the truth. My eyes tingled as I thought of Luke and his smoke machine making a fool of me.

‘Okay, um, Saffron, yes… the hen party.’ I took a deep breath. Was now the moment to tell her? But with a look at her face, already hurting from her row with Jonny, I just couldn’t do it. Not yet. ‘The do wasn’t bad – all the cupcakes went down a bomb.’ Don’t hint about the affair, I told myself. Tonight definitely wasn’t the night to reveal all. ‘What’s this Steve like?’

‘He’s all right,’ said Melissa. ‘A hardworking type – he carries a lot of statistics around in his head. I had a bit of a funny phone call from him, actually, the week before you got here. He wanted to know if I’d seen Saffron, as if we were best friends or something; he didn’t seem to want to get off the phone.’

‘Sounds like he was checking up on her,’ said Jess. ‘Maybe she’s up to no good.’

I spluttered and swallowed the wrong way. Jess thumped my back hard. I took another sip of champagne.

‘Was it something I said?’ Jess grinned. ‘Here, have a stick of chewing gum, it’ll calm you down.’

‘No thanks,’ I mumbled.

Melissa stared at me. ‘Kimmy? Did you find out something juicy tonight? Don’t say Jess is right… Is she playing away?’

‘How… um… should I know?’

‘Come on, spill,’ she said.

‘What makes you think there’s anything to tell?’ Oh no, I could feel my cheeks going red.