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Of Night and Desire

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On an unconscious level, like osmosis, she must have learned what she needed from Valya. Pleased with herself, she smiled slyly as she continued her search for the fortune-teller.

How odd Valya didn’t see her, couldn’t find her. She couldn’t have
taken down her tent alone and left so quickly.
Arriving at the same spot, there wasn’t a sign a tent had been pitched there. No stake holes, no upturned dirt or matted grass. Nothing, as if it were all a figment of her imagination.

Someone must know where she is,
she mused as she began going from carnie to carnie asking about the fortune-teller. Everyone she spoke with stared at her blankly with the same response—what fortune-teller?
How can
no one with the carnival know who Madame Selene is? She was here!

Richelle pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and

forefinger as she furrowed her brow. Shielding her eyes, she gazed up at the midday sun.
About one, maybe one-thirty.
Closing her eyes, she tried to clear her head by shaking it a few times. She couldn’t shake the hungover feeling, like she had slept too long, since she had left Valya’s loft.

Usually her day started about eleven, but today she had overslept and hadn’t slipped out until noon. She tried “thinking” her way back to the carnival, the same way they arrived at Valya’s loft, but it didn’t work.

Maybe Valya was teasing her and she hadn’t actually been the one to transport them. Maybe she didn’t have enough power to do it on her own.

Or maybe she could only do it with Valya’s help, although she was able to erect mind blocks on her own.

It made no difference. She wasn’t able to transport on her own, so she had to call a cab to take her the thirty-five miles to the carnival.
You could
have asked Valya for his help,
she chided herself.
No, I couldn’t. I have to
do this on my own.
Why she felt the need to do it on her own, she had no idea, she just couldn’t ask him. Perhaps it was because she knew he would say no.

But she had to find Madame Selene and ask for her help. She seemed to know so much. Possibly she would be able to tell her how to prepare for the second blood, so she would be able to recognize Valya. Richelle knew in her heart that completing the ritual wasn’t what was making her so nervous; it was the vulnerability that lay with the second blood.

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The thought of losing a portion of her memories, albeit it temporary, was unnerving enough, but having to rely on “Swiss cheese for brains” was downright scary.
What if I don’t recognize him? What if I turn him down?

Life was already riddled with so many “turn right instead of left” what-if’s, it seemed unnecessary to test lovers by relying on destiny to intercede.

That may be fine for Immortals, with their seemingly infinite powers and wisdom, but she was a mere mortal. Mortals were notorious for their ability to make the wrong decision at the wrong time.

And in this matter, she
could not
be wrong.

She had never felt so alive, so complete. And it was more than just sex…um, making love. She felt empowered, as if there were nothing she couldn’t accomplish if she set her mind to it. Her mother had taught her to walk. Duncan had shown her how to stand on her own two feet, but Valya gave her the strength to step out on a cliff and stand against the storm without faltering.

She felt no fear when she was with Valya. More than his ability to protect her, she wasn’t afraid to enjoy life. She would never have thought to go to a carnival by herself. She would have been petrified. Yet here she was, and she wasn’t afraid.

On the contrary, she hungered for more. More explorations, more adventures, more experiences…more
life.
That’s why she needed to find Madame Selene. She wanted to make sure she recognized Valya and not rely on the whim of the Fates.
I need a guarantee.

“There are no guarantees in life, my child.”

Richelle whirled to find Madame Selene standing behind her, her hands crossed in front of her, resting across her midsection. She was wearing the same green and purple robes and the compassionate expression of understanding.

“We must all take our turns at the Wheel of Fate and accept the, as you say, the whims of the Fates.”

“How did you know what I was—”

“Why do you seek me, my dear child? Did I not answer all your

questions yestereve?”

“Yes…I mean, no…I mean, I have a few more questions,” Richelle replied hastily. She fought the nervous knot forming in the pit of her stomach as she pressed Selene for answers.

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Madame Selene chuckled softly as she walked past Richelle toward the clearing where her tent was
supposed
to be. Richelle turned and followed, taking larger strides than usual to keep up. For an old woman, she moved quicker than she appeared.

“What can I answer for you, my child?”

“Why is it no one here knows you? I’ve talked to patrons and

employees, asking about Madame Selene and where your tent was. No one knew what I was talking about. No one knew anything about you. Why?”

She shrugged. “Others see only what they wish to see. They believe only what they wish to believe.” The coldness of Selene’s tone spoke volumes of what she thought of others’ attitudes. “But that isn’t what you came to ask me, is it?”

“No. I need your help. You seem to know much about me, about Valya.

I need to know. Are you an Immortal?”

Madame Selene stopped and turned sharply to face Richelle. Her eyes were clear and bright, the sparkling sapphires vivid features against her white skin and silver hair.

“You see much, my little butterfly, though you have recently emerged from your cocoon.”

“Are you?”

Madame turned away to gaze off into the clear sky, wincing as the sunlight kissed her cheek.

“I am many things. Daughter of Luna and mother to Eternal Night, a fallen Jezebel destined to walk the Earth alone. I am Wisdom, sister of the Moraie, watching and protecting the tapestry from those who would unravel the woven threads. And I am the servant of Athena, ensuring justice for the righteous and retribution against those who would align themselves with Evil.”

“Please, no more riddles,” Richelle demanded. “Just tell me. Are you an Immortal?”

Madame Selene did not answer, but a slight nod of her head gave Richelle the answer she needed.

“Then you know why I’ve come.”

Again, a slight nod.

“Then tell me. How can I ensure I will recognize Valya after he takes second blood?”

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“It is dangerous to tamper with the intentions of fate. There are reasons why things are designed the way they are. Life mates must rely on destiny to guide their steps in making the right decisions. Only then do they know if they are guided by Eternal Love or the trappings of lust.”

“That’s fine if you’re Immortal, but I’m a human. We make mistakes.”

“Immortals are not infallible,” the seer uttered, her voice tinged with remorse. And regret. “Sometimes…we make mistakes as well.”

Richelle was taken aback. Madame Selene spoke as someone who

understood the sorrow and joy of love. Then she lowered her barrier to allow Richelle to see the man she had loved.

He was handsome, with the same aristocratic demeanor as Selene as they walked side by side through a mountain glade. They spoke with the same lilting accent. They had the same vivid features, with silver hair and bright eyes. The only difference was his eyes were pale blue like a summer sky while hers were dark blue like the sparkling ocean.

With the personification of water and sky, Richelle couldn’t help but think of an old Tao lesson: a bird and a fish may love one another, but where would they build a home? She felt Madame Selene’s distress when he sent her away, then her wrath as she vowed revenge. But then she felt something else. As she tried to probe Madame Selene’s thoughts, she was shut out and walls were erected to hide whatever lay behind.

“His name was Nicolae.”

“He was very handsome.”

“Yes, he is.”

Richelle waited impatiently for Selene to continue, but she didn’t. She started walking to the edge of the carnival with Richelle following a step behind in mystified silence. When they reached the edge of the forest the fortune-teller turned and spoke.

“You must leave. Return to your Valya and complete the bonding ritual.”

“Won’t you tell me what happened?”

“It was a long, long time ago. A past that must remain…in the past.”

“Please,” Richelle coaxed. “Tell me what happened.”

Selene couldn’t look at Richelle, couldn’t speak the words of the pain she had caused.

“I betrayed him.”

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“How?”

“I did the unforgivable. I defied the Fates and tried to deceive him into
completing the bonding ritual with me.”

“You were not life mates?”

“No. When he realized my deception, he was incensed. He took me
before the Triad and demanded I be exiled.”

Richelle took Selene’s hand and held it to her heart. When Selene turned, she did nothing to hide the tears forming in her eyes that she refused to shed. So Richelle cried for her.

“He was hurt, Selene. And angry. What he did was cruel.”

Selene shook her head in staunch rebuttal.

“No, I learned he was right when I found the man who was destined to
be my life mate.”

“So, you completed…”

“No, we did not bond. When I found Michael, it was too late. His mind
was gone, ravaged by old age. He suffered from Alzheimer’s and could not
willingly complete the ritual.”

The tears that she refused to shed for Nicolae fell freely as she spoke of Michael, her eyes brilliant with remembered love.

“He was a wonderful man with a good heart. In his more lucid

moments, he spoke of his dreams and visions of my people. How he never married because he never found his ‘one true love’ and how I made him happier than he had ever been.” She wiped away the tears and smiled wistfully.

“I stayed with him, lived with him, and took care of him until his death.

Upon his deathbed, he recognized me as his life mate. When he died, he promised he would wait for me to join him, and in death we would be together for eternity.”

“So why didn’t you join him? Oh, I’m sorry, I mean…” Richelle

couldn’t believe how callous her remark was. It was like she was saying,
So,
why didn’t you kill yourself?
But Selene didn’t say anything. She just pulled Richelle’s hand to her chest. Beneath their joined hands, she felt a soft thump. And after a moment, another. And then another. Surprised, Richelle stared at Selene unbelievingly.

“You have a heartbeat!”

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“Yes.” Selene nodded, closing her eyes. Her face was glowing in sweet bliss as if she were savoring the feeling of the beating in her chest.

“But how? You didn’t bond and…”

“The world abounds with magic, mysteries, and miracles—these mystic gifts allowed me to surpass my body’s limitations to come and help you.

Though not bonded, Michael’s love taught me the true depth of emotion between life mates. He healed me. So though we did not become as one, his love filled me and brought me to a new life I would have never known without him, one filled with mercy, forgiveness, and hope.”

“Forgiveness? Hope?”

Selene released Richelle’s hand as she backed to the edge of the forest.

“Nicolae was correct in my punishment, but I did not see that at first.

And I am here to right the wrong I did to him and to our people. I am the reason Luka now searches for you.”

“Luka? Who is he?”

Selene swallowed hard and her eyes grew cold as the ocean depths. Her mouth was set in a firm grimace as she spoke.

“Luka is an abomination. Born Immortal, he has rejected his people and has become Vampyre. He leads Preacher and the Believers in their search for you. He, too, defies the design of the Fates and wants you for himself.”

Richelle choked on words of denial and stepped away from Selene, shaking her head as she refused to accept Selene’s explanation.

“How are you the reason?”

Selene stood rigid, proud, ready to accept Richelle’s anger.

“I was the one who told Luka of the Prophecy. I was the one who led him to your mother, Adelaide. And to you.”

“Why?” Richelle wailed.

“I was hurt and angry at Nicolae’s rejection of me. I wanted revenge.

But I see now I was wrong. And I try to make amends for my foolish deeds.

You must leave here and not come back.”

“What?”

“Luka’s followers are here, searching for you.”

Like a frightened rabbit, Richelle was on alert, her ears picking up the sounds all around her. Finally, she was able to discern the agitated conversations of several groups of Believers, about ten or eleven men in all.

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“You must run and hide,” Selene continued in a harried tone. “It is too late for you to get away without their noticing you. Wait until evening and then call for your Valya. Complete the bonding ritual to destroy Luka and save your world.”

“What do you mean—destroy Luka?”

Selene didn’t answer as she began to disappear into the forest behind her, much to Richelle’s dismay.

“Wait! You didn’t tell me. How can I be sure to recognize Valya?”

Selene shimmered from her sight, her body disintegrating amidst the trees of the forest until only her voice with its hypnotic cadence could be heard over the whistling wind.

“You and your Valya, you are our future. Trust in the Fates as you must
learn to trust in yourself…trust in yourself…trust in yourself.”

Selene’s voice faded off in the air. Listening intently, Richelle tried to locate in which direction she headed. All she heard were the rustling leaves from the trees as the wind blew. Selene was gone.