Metanoia (22 page)

“
What is going on?”
Fheyrhil demanded, reaching the house. It was the first time he had
talked to someone in a long while. He went inside and saw Alvina
sitting there, shaking. “Alvina? What is wrong? What did you see?”
He wrapped his arm around her and after a long while she finally
spoke.

“
Elenzel…” she
whispered.

“
What of him?” Fheyrhil
coaxed.

“
He…he…he…” she gasped. “He
just came to my door.” Shock filled the room. By this time many had
come to her home. Calypso and Jacinda had come by this time too and
sat by Alvina’s side.

“
Alvina,” Calypso began,
“Elenzel is dead. We were there when it happened…”

“
I’m not making this up!”
Alvina insisted. “I heard a knock on my door, and I answered it and
saw Elenzel. He just said, ‘Alvina, I’m back’ and then I screamed.
He ran off.” Fheyrhil could not believe this, but he hated the
thought of Alvina finally snapping. He turned to a few close to
him.

“
Search the city. I wish to
see if there is truth to these statements,” he ordered.

“
They are true!” Alvina
screamed jumping up. “I’m not lying! Elenzel is back from the
dead!!! He came to me!!” She screamed and screamed and waved her
arms around crazily. The girls jumped up to try to calm
her.

“
Come on, Alvina,” Jacinda
said, “you are spending the night with us.”

“
I’m not crazy! You think I
am?” she asked and began to laugh so hard that everyone doubted her
sanity. “Oh, God! I’ve lost it! I’ve lost it!” she whispered. The
girls helped her out of the house while Fheyrhil looked
on.

“
How is it I cannot feel
what is going on anymore?” he asked himself, but he knew the
answer. Gina was gone.

The citizens searched the city but Elenzel
was not found. Alvina still screamed throughout the night that he
lived, but no one believed her. Everyone had forgotten how to
believe. Days passed and the incident faded into the backs of
minds. Alvina had not been let out of at least one person’s sight.
She still would go into fits, claiming that the dead were walking.
Everyone pitied her. She had lost one of her best friends and
Hayden. No one blamed her for acting out.

Leyance had fully recovered but kept to
himself. He still had not spoken a word to anyone. Fheyrhil worried
about him as he also worried about himself. Yet, it was Leyance’s
condition that Fheyrhil thought of as he walked through the city
one night. Soon, something caught his attention. A light was on in
Alvina’s cottage. He very well knew that she was still under
Calypso and Jacinda’s constant supervision at their homes.
Cautiously, he walked up to the window and peered in. At first he
saw nothing, but suddenly someone walked into his field of view and
sat on the couch. A man.

Alvina lay asleep on Calypso’s couch while
Jacinda and Calypso sat at the table sipping tea. The night had
been quiet for them. Alvina had not had a fit tonight, but their
silence was soon broken. Fheyrhil knocked on the door and opened it
without waiting for a response. All three girls jumped up to look
at him. Even Alvina jolted from her sleep.

“
Girls, Alvina was right,
she was right…” he gasped.

“
You found Elenzel?”
Jacinda asked nervously.

“
Yes. He was staying in
Alvina’s cottage.” He followed their gaze to Alvina who stood
dumbfounded.

“
He’s alive…” she said.
“And I thought I really was going crazy, but I was right… I was
right.”

The city rejoiced over Elenzel’s return from
the dead, yet it scared them. How was it that he now lived? When he
was found amongst the bodies during the battle, he was examined and
found dead. Yet, here he was, alive and well. He had no
recollection of how he breathed again. He remembered his death,
followed by a golden light and then waking up again in the woods.
He had come to the city and the first light he saw was that of
Alvina’s cottage. Still in a daze, he had been scared off by
Alvina’s screams.

One thing everyone knew was that this event
revitalized the city. Hope had come back to their hearts, and
people were beginning to live like normal. Fheyrhil felt his sixth
sense returning, understanding the world better. Alvina was slowly
recovering from going slightly crazy. Jacinda and Calypso were
easing into their normal lives again. Elenzel was back into
training with Gloria and Kaleb and regaining strength quickly. The
birds were singing and occasionally the phoenix could even be seen
flying overhead. The sun was shining and everyone seemed to be as
they once had been, except for one. Leyance still refused to see
anyone and kept to his room. He had not spoken a word in two
months. Yet, life continued on without him. No one spoke of him and
only a few eyes wandered to his window hoping to catch a glance of
him.

It had been two weeks when another person
showed up. Alvina was again in her cottage when a knock came at the
door. Slightly frightened, she opened the door and peered out into
the darkness.

“
Hello? Uh, is anyone
there?” she asked timidly.

“
Alvina…It’s me…” Alvina
gasped, recognizing the voice. She looked to her right and saw the
outline of a man. He stepped into the light created by the open
window, and Alvina screamed. She ran up to him and jumped into his
arms.

“
Hayden! Hayden! Oh, my
God, it’s a miracle! I’m so sorry, Hayden. I love you so much! I
love you!” she said, holding onto him with everything she had in
her, and he did the same.

“
I love you too, Alvina.
I’m not going to let anything get in the way of our love this
time.” He didn’t either. In a week, Alvina and Hayden were married.
It raised the city’s spirits, but heartache was still too near for
some to rejoice.

Hayden had been back for a couple of weeks
when another citizen presumed dead showed up and then another and
another. Every two weeks another would show up. It was becoming a
pattern. The phoenix would fly overhead and within a few days,
another would show up. The phoenix would not be seen until about
two weeks later, signaling another would be coming back soon. The
bird represented hope and families wished for the return of their
own loved ones every time they saw it.

This phenomenon amazed many but none so much
as Fheyrhil. Many wild theories were going around as to why this
was occurring but he had theories of his own, educated theories. He
kept the thought to himself and waited patiently to find out if he
was right.

About a month had passed since a new person
had shown up and the phoenix was rarely seen. Everyone was back in
the city but the question of how was still yet to be answered.
Fheyrhil sensed that these strange oddities were not over yet.
While in private thought, one word came to his head. Kulinai. That
very day he rode out himself in search of answers in that city.
When he arrived in the city, everything seemed normal. The city had
been rebuilt, and yet one thing seemed odd. People filled the
streets, yet not many had survived the massacre. Then, Fheyrhil saw
the phoenix flying through the sky and knew his theory was correct.
He quickly sent messengers to the other world to check on their
status. Sure enough, those once killed by Gina were roaming the
streets happily, having no memory of ever being dead (no doubt the
work of a memory-erasing spell). The world was back to the way it
should be.

One night the phoenix flew through the
streets of Nythagié. A cloaked and hooded figure walked not far
from it. The figure looked around the city in the middle hours of
the night. Gracefully, the phoenix floated down and landed on the
person’s outstretched arm. The bird pecked at the cloak, attempting
to drag the person closer to the city.

“
No,” the figure whispered.
“I can’t. Not now.” The phoenix looked ahead to the city but then
back at its friend in understanding. With that, they walked back
into the woods and out of sight.

The next morning Fheyrhil found himself
wandering the streets of the city, his eyes to the sky. He hoped
that a familiar bird would grace the sky with its presence, but so
far only robins and mockingbirds had done so. He did not quite know
what he would do if he saw the creature, and yet his heart still
had an incredible yearning to see it. Not until a week later did he
finally see the bird. It flew overhead with new energy. It flew
once over the entire city, passing close to Leyance’s window. Then
it made its way back to the woods. Fheyrhil was ready and followed
the bird until he saw it diving down to the earth, Fheyrhil
watching from a distance. It was only when the figure the bird
landed on turned to gaze at it did he realize that the phoenix had
landed on a person wearing a dark blue cloak. Still, he kept silent
and listened.

“
How is he?” the person
asked the phoenix. The bird cooed and looked into the eyes of the
person, still shielded from Fheyrhil’s eyes by the cloak. The
person seemed to have a knowledge of what the bird was saying and
nodded slowly. “I thought he still would be. He isn’t getting over
this easily. And why should he?” The bird grasped the cloak and
tried to pull the person. “No, I told you. I can’t go back now.
Maybe not ever. They would never forgive me; I’ll never forgive
myself. I shared the experience. I still remember everything I did,
everything I thought about, every killing…” the figure shuttered.
The bird pecked at the person’s arm lovingly. “I know, I know. It
still doesn’t right the wrong I did. Even now, I’m using you to do
it. It doesn’t solve the fact that their loved ones still had to go
through the pain of knowing they were dead. Just the fact that I
could have done that…I can’t take it. I can’t face them. I might
not be the same person, but, yet, I am. I won’t be able to escape
the stares and hate they no doubt have for me.”

“
They don’t hate you.” The
person turned to face Fheyrhil who walked out of his hiding spot,
yet the stranger’s face remained shielded by the hood.

“
Fheyrhil…” came a simple
reply, but soon the head was turned away. “You might not, but the
rest do. They must.”

“
That’s not true. They miss
you. They know it was just the spell, not truly you.”

“
But it was me… How did you
find me anyway?”

“
I followed your friend
here,” he responded, nodding towards the phoenix. The cloaked
figure turned slowly to look at the bird who looked away,
guiltily.

“
It’s ok. No harm done.” A
small slender hand came out of the cloak to pet the bird’s
head.

“
Come home, Gina. We miss
you. Leyance has completely broken down without you.”

“
I know he has. I’ve had
the phoenix check up on him.” She was calm and almost robotic.
Fheyrhil sensed that if she acted even slightly more relaxed, she
would burst into uncontrollable tears.

“
Please, Gina. We love you.
It wasn’t your fault…” At this Gina turned around so fast that the
hood flew off, revealing her tear stained cheeks.

“
It
is
my
fault. Everything is my fault. No one held my hand on the arrow to
aim it at victims. No one made me think those awful thoughts. No
one told me to kill and destroy the way I did. No one told me to
attack my husband. No one made me attack my friends. No one made me
do any of that, but I still did! I must take responsibility for my
actions. It was part of me. I never felt anyone’s control over me.
I never felt like I was someone else but the true me. Then I split
into two and though I was terrified of my evil self, I was in awe.
I did unforgivable things, and I can’t hurt the city more by
showing my face to them. You think Leyance is messed up now? Just
wait until he sees me back from the double-dead! What am I supposed
to do? Waltz right up and say, ‘Hey, honey. I’m home?’ It doesn’t
work that way! You know everything: you sure as hell ought to know
that. I’m not even better. I haven’t stopped
killing.”

“
You are now righting the
wrongs. You are bringing the people back.”

“
Yes, by killing,” she
stated. She turned and motioned to the phoenix. “After my funeral,
she came to me. She nestled herself in my outstretched hand and by
some power I was able to resurrect myself by killing her. I somehow
managed to make her catch on fire, maybe she did it without me but
because she died, I lived. Phoenixes can be reborn from the ashes,
so I have been forced to kill her in order to resurrect each person
I’ve destroyed. Don’t you see? There cannot be life without death.
In order to save, I am...” She paused. “I now completely embody
that concept. I have to wait until she is reborn and grown and able
to be killed again in order to save another life. I have only saved
lives because I am killing on the side! I’ve dragged this poor bird
into this and by some odd chance, she has grown fond of me and
allowed me to do as I have done to save the others. I’m still a
killer and forever will be. I can’t go back to such a pure city
when I have this wickedness in me.”

“
They will forgive
you.”

“
I can’t go. I want to
protect them and right now they need protection from
me.”

“
You have to come back,
eventually. You cannot keep running forever.”

“
I’ve done it fine so far,
and I can continue to do so. I can’t risk hurting anyone
else.”

“
Please, Leyance has not
spoken to anyone in months. He needs you. He’s had to live through
your death yet again. Please, come for his sake.” Gina looked up at
him and then down at her phoenix. The bird sang sweetly and
joyfully. Gina knew what the bird wanted her to do.