Meows, Magic & Murder (8 page)

“Yes, why?”

“It’s just that I could really use it right about now, but I don’t think I had better the way Lucy was moving. I don’t think my ticker could take it. In the future, you might want to think twice before you try out one of your salves or potions on just anyone.”

“I know, but Lucy was hurting so bad that I just wanted to help.”

“I think you’d better go over there tomorrow and get the rest of it back before something dreadful happens like the woman has a heart attack.” She then grinned. “So, how was your date with your handsome neighbor?”

“It wasn’t a date, but I have to admit that I really had a great time getting to know him. I think he might even prove to be handy in case I get arrested.”

“Arrested for what? Trying out an herbal remedy on Lucy?”

“No, I meant for murder since the sheriff thinks I’m a suspect in Helen’s death, and, of course, Jeremy’s disappearance.”

Aunt Maxine waved her hand. “Nonsense. That sheriff Pinkerton is just a bag of wind, always has been. And Jeremy hasn’t really disappeared, he’s in plain sight,” she chuckled. “Although, you might not want to tell the sheriff or anyone else that you turned Jeremy into a cat. Someone might just think you’re off your rocker.”

Petunia frowned. “We bumped into Olivia and Henry at Mario’s.”

“That’s to be expected. I had thought that you had gotten him out of your system by now. Honey, he’s lost to you.”

“Oh, I know, but it nauseates me every time I see them together, and I looked like a complete fool in front of them, too.”

“How so?”

“Because Noah never made a reservation. He didn’t know, but anyway the busboy gave me that table by the bathrooms again. I’m afraid Olivia saw me there and you know how that woman is, she just can’t shut up her yap.” Petunia rubbed her brow. “I’m afraid I did something dreadful, or at least I think I did.”

Aunt Maxine leaned forward, giving Petunia her full attention now. “Do tell?”

“Well, I can’t remember what she said, but I was so angry and I was thinking about how much I wanted to trip her up, and the next thing I knew, she tripped and fell on her face. I think there was a wrinkle in the carpet.”

Aunt Maxine clapped in excitement. “Or you’re coming into you own.”

“I’m not a witch, Auntie, but Olivia sure called me one. And you, too. Right there in Mario’s.” She covered her face with her hands. “I have never felt so mortified before. When Olivia tripped, I firmly believe it was karma. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. Do you think that makes me a bad person?”

“Not at all. That woman needs to learn to leave you alone. She might, now that she thinks you have real powers. And I wonder if you might just have abilities that you’re not even aware of.”

“But ... I’m not a witch, and neither are you.”

“No, but you did make a salve that actually works, a little too well, possibly. But this might just be a good turn of events. The way I look at it, we’ve been using recipes for potions from Anastasia’s book, and she really was a witch.”

“I don’t want to be a witch, though. If I were, I wouldn’t be a very good one, anyway, since I made hair tonic that makes a man totally bald. And don’t forget I turned a man into a cat from a love potion. If only I’d known then what I know now. Jeremy as a cat has really shown his true colors. He would be the worst boyfriend ever.”

“I’d have to agree with you there, but perhaps when you’re ready, you might just try and change him back to human form. That way you’d be off the hook for his disappearance, at least.”

“True, but I’m just not sure I’m ready to botch up another potion. Who knows what else might happen?”

Aunt Maxine yawned, stretching her arms toward the ceiling. “I think I’ll stay here tonight, Petunia. I’m too bushed to drive home. Plus, with the curse and all, I don’t want to take my chances.”

Petunia led the way up the stairs. “I didn’t think you believed in the curse?”

“It’s not that I don’t believe in it as much as I’m too old to worry about it too much. I figure I’m plenty old enough to meet my maker.”

Aunt Maxine made way into a bedroom and Petunia said, “Just be careful, Auntie. I’d truly be lost without you. I’m not ready to be alone.”

“If you play your cards right, you might never have to worry about it. I’ve seen how Noah looks at you. Don’t give up all hope that you’ll find a man that’s right for you. I have a good feeling about him.”

Instead of responding, Petunia closed the door and went to her own room. She had to admit that she was beginning to like Noah just a little, but it wasn’t the time to be thinking about that since she had to find out who killed three women in her town by way of knitting needles.

* * *

“Well, Melvin, what you do think about the neighborhood?”

Melvin put his head down with that usual “I just got into trouble” look that his pit bull could pull off that bordered on laughable.

“Besides the neighbor’s cat.”

So far, Noah was beginning to like Petunia. It would be a real bummer if she actually turned out to be a killer, though. She had a past not much different than his, too, which was discouraging with the way she looked at Henry at the restaurant. He wasn’t sure if she hadn’t gotten over him just yet, or if it was the shock of seeing him with his wife. Olivia sure had it out for Petunia and if Noah had anything to say about it, he would do anything in his power to protect her, even from a murder charge, if need be.

Noah thought about checking out Petunia on a law enforcement website, but he had no ability to since he currently wasn’t a member of any police department. He was sure shocked that a body had turned up on his lawn and he hoped this case would be cleared up, and soon. That sure wouldn’t look good when he ran for sheriff. Sheriff Pinkerton seemed a little too quick to pin it on Petunia, and Noah’s gut just told him that they’d have to look more into just who Helen Patterson really was when she was alive. Experience told him that would be the best place to start.

* * *

In the morning, Petunia took her shower and donned comfortable shoes, her not-so-comfortable jeans around the waist, and a pink, baby-doll style shirt. When she made it to the first floor, the fragrance of coffee wafted over to her. Obviously, Aunt Maxine had made it up much earlier and had started a pot.

Petunia smiled as Aunt Maxine stood at the stove, cooking bacon. “Morning, Petunia. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to wake you up. If we don’t get over to Lucy’s early, I don’t know if we’ll be able to catch her at home, if yesterday at my shop was an indication.”

She nodded and poured a cup of coffee, just as Pansy came whirling into the room, crashing into a chair leg.

“What on earth, Pansy?”

“Don’t blame me. That Merlin has been chasing me all morning.”

Petunia snickered.
“Oh, and why is he doing that?”

“How should I know, but a guy can only get his butt sniffed so much before the fun wears off.”

Petunia smiled as her American Bobtail strutted into the room. Pansy jumped on the table.
“Please, tell him to stop.”

She just shook her head. She didn’t have the heart to remind Pansy that in the big scheme of things, his transition from man to feline had some other drawbacks, like learning to deal with other cats, some of whom displayed more dog-like qualities, like sniffing butts. That was Merlin to a tee. He was a rescue cat that lived on the edge of Lake Forest with a pet hoarder, until animal control got involved. From the get-go, it was obvious that Merlin wasn’t an ordinary cat, with habits you’d expect to see a cat do—not that any cat was like the others, because they all have their own unique personalities. That itty bitty cat from the pet hoarder’s house was no longer small, but the largest of all her cats and quite the bully, at times.

Petunia clapped her hands. “Merlin, leave Pansy alone.” She proceeded to go to the refrigerator and pull out a can of cat food. Merlin wasn’t the only one that raced to the food dish before she even filled the bowl. Sassy, the white Persian, and Gem, her Himalayan, also clamored over to the bowl, standing at attention. She moved away and the cats fought over the dish, nearly scattering all of the moist food all over the kitchen.

“Meow, meow,” Pansy wailed.

“I can see that I’ll have to bring Pansy with me today. It just won’t be safe for Pansy to stay home, not with Merlin on the rampage.”

They ate breakfast and Petunia caught sight of Melvin running across her backyard with Noah chasing after him, vigorously shaking a can of treats. Petunia tried not to stare too pointedly since Noah only wore jeans and no shirt, his rippling muscles in perfect gawking view.
No, Petunia. Don’t look at Noah! Oh, God, was he ever in shape.

“Petunia, whatever are you staring at?” Aunt Maxine asked. She turned and muttered, “Oh, welcome to the neighborhood.”

Petunia buried her face in her cup, or as near as she could, guzzling the coffee down.

“Don’t act so coy, dear. It’s not like you’re gawking or anything.” She batted her eyelashes for emphasis.

“No, I wasn’t. I just wondered why Melvin is running around like that again. He said that he only does that when he’s frightened by a cat, and mine are all here.” She took a mental count of her cats, and frowned. “Hey, where is Pansy now?”

“Looks like he slipped out the rip in your screen door. I thought you were planning on having that fixed.”

Petunia stood up. “I was, but then I found a body.”

“Well, don’t just stand there, get your cat before he gets gobbled up by that Pit, or, er ... he scares that dog again. I’d hate to see Noah have to chase his dog all over town again. It might not bode for him well in the next election.”

CHAPTER EIGHT

After Petunia went out the door, she raced after Pansy, who was having fun hissing and pawing at Melvin, who then ran the opposite way, much to Noah’s displeasure as noted by his narrowed eyes.

“Can’t you catch that cat of yours?” Noah grumbled.

“I could say the same about your dog. He needs obedience classes, from the looks of it.”

“Pansy, if you don’t stop this nonsense right now, I’m going to let Merlin outside and then you’ll really be in trouble.”

Pansy bounded toward Petunia.
“What are you talking about?”

Just then, a tiger cat entered her yard.
“Hurry up. We have company, or specifically, you do.”

The tiger cat raced forward and Petunia picked Pansy up just before the cat got too close.
“What have you done to anger every cat in the neighborhood?”

* * *

“I can’t believe you, Petunia,”
Pansy wailed all the way to Lucy’s house.
“I can’t believe you turned me into a cat and now I have to deal with all of the cats in the neighborhood after me?”

Petunia stopped walking, trying to regain her composure.
“I didn’t mean to turn you into a cat, for one thing, and how was I to know that you would find a way to make so many cats come after you. You really need to try to play nice. Did you do something to make the other cats angry?”

“Oh, uhm ... no, I have no idea.”

“I find that hard to believe, but it might just be they’re tired of you scaring Melvin. Most cats don’t know he’s harmless and actually afraid of cats.”

“Expressions, dear. You really need to learn how to not move your lips when you talk to that cat,” Aunt Maxine said.

Petunia sighed. “Oh, what’s the use? There’s no way I can make it up to Jeremy, I mean Pansy, for what I’ve done to him.”

“You could at least try to turn him back,” Aunt Maxine suggested. “Who knows, you might just get lucky on your first try. We’ll have to take a look at the potion book when we get to the shop.”

Petunia wasn’t so sure, but she owed Jeremy that much, a real chance to try to at least turn him back into human form. Although that worried her, too. What would he do to her if he was a man once again?

“Run, run as far away from you as I can,”
Pansy said, jumping into her thoughts.
“I just think you should at least attempt to turn me back.”

“
And what if you turn into a frog or grow an extra head? There are worse things to be than a cat, you know.”

“I’m not even going to dignify that with a response.”

As they neared Lucy’s house she was outside, pushing a lawnmower across her yard at quite a quick pace. She waved and cut off the engine when she locked eyes with Petunia.

Petunia held on tight to Pansy’s leash as Lucy gave her a tight hug. “Oh, here’s the golden girl, now. I can’t thank you enough for that salve. I’ve never felt so great in my life.”

“Isn’t mowing the lawn tiring for you?” Petunia asked Lucy.

“Well, I cleaned my house top to bottom already, so there wasn’t much else to do. Watch this.”

Petunia bit a fist as Lucy threw out her arms and did a cartwheel, a real cartwheel! She couldn’t even do one of those. “Stop, Lucy. You might hurt yourself.”

She laughed. “Don’t worry about that. My doctor gave me the all clear. He told me whatever I was doing to limber up was working. All signs of my arthritis are gone, too. I’d kiss you if you weren’t a girl.”

Petunia laughed nervously. “How much of the salve did you use?”

“The whole container. You’d better make some more, and pronto. I let it slip that you’d whipped up a concoction for me.”

“I really wish you hadn’t. I’m not even sure of the recipe I used. I mean, I didn’t jot it down, even. I’m just worried that this might be temporary and you’ll have your arthritis back in time.”

Lucy frowned. “I see. Well, even if it does come back, I’m still thankful for the time I have now feeling great. I’m training for the marathon that they hold at the Lake Forest Country Club. I’m in the seventy-plus group. I’m going to have them old folks eating my dust.”

Petunia tried to be happy for Lucy, but somehow she saw a downside to this all. “I’m glad that it worked for you and hope that it lasts.”

Petunia gave Pansy’s leash a small tug until he moved back up the street and toward Mystical Remedies. Her heart just throbbed in pain now. She just was sick about that salve and what it had done for Lucy. She was happy that Lucy felt much better, but she couldn’t help but think that if only she had used less, that the results might have been more consistent for her. Nobody Lucy’s age needed to be doing cartwheels or running a marathon. If she dropped dead, everyone in town would be pointing their fingers right at Petunia.