Memories of Gold (7 page)

She smiled, and her beauty shone through the mask of exhaustion that covered her face. “Yes, just tired. I…didn’t get much sleep last night.”

He noted her stammer. She was so exhausted, she even found it difficult to speak. Wanting to touch her, to comfort her somehow, he placed his hand on hers and spoke in low voice. “You should get some sleep. We can do this another day.”

She shook her head in that defiant way he knew so well. “You must work tomorrow, and who knows how much time you will have free after that? And if you leave in a week or so, we might be separated for years again. I want to store up every moment I have with you.”

Jimmy nodded, somber for a moment. He had spent many of his waking moments thinking about the same thing and working up the courage to speak his mind. This was as good a time as any.

When he spoke, he tried to make his voice lighthearted, like this was a friendly gesture and nothing more, no matter what his heart said. “If I leave, you should consider coming with me. Many people love San Francisco.”

Her pause and the grimace that crossed her face told him all he needed to know, and he felt his soul sink. Quietly, she muttered, “I can’t. This is my home.”

The last part sounded unconvincing. He tried not to let his disappointment show. Until that moment, he hadn’t realized how much he wanted her to say yes.

Her fingers touched his, squeezing for a moment. “It’s hard to explain, Jimmy. I want to, but I can’t.”

His heart lifted a little at that. She sounded genuine, and her fingers touched his so lovingly that his hope rekindled. Perhaps he would simply need to convince her. Even if it took the rest of their time together, it would be worth it. He said, “I understand. But it’s a wonderful city. You would like it, I think.”

“Do you like San Francisco?” she asked.

Jimmy nodded, but it was forced. The city was a little dirty and crowded for his taste, but his job was there. His dreams were there. “It’s interesting and full of life. And the food is delicious.”

She gave him a little sad smile, and he decided it would be best not to press the topic more for the moment. There would be time enough later.

They were silent for a long while, listening to the birds, comfortable in their closeness, as Mary lost herself in thought. San Francisco seemed exciting, but the idea of a big city didn’t call to her. She liked being out in the wild, away from civilization, if only for a short time.

She missed the freedom to run through the grasses and sit all day beside the river attempting to catch fish, though the hours rarely brought success. She hadn’t actually realized how much of her soul had shriveled simply from staying in town for so long; it was only when they had visited the forest the day before that it began to stretch out again.

Still, even with that, she would follow him, if not for Emma. The poor girl could never live that close to so many people. Even getting her accustomed to Mrs. Harper and her family had been a chore. She could never put her through that. But it was Jimmy—how could she let him go after she had only just found him again?

She focused on him so close to her. The press of his warm body against hers set her blood to racing, and she could feel desire bubbling underneath the surface like a pot of water right before it begins to boil. Although Maria had been tired and achy from lack of sleep when she arrived, the surroundings and Jimmy’s tenderness and proximity rejuvenated her. She put aside her worries and let herself enjoy the moment.

When she felt she could stand it no longer and could barely stop herself from pressing into him more purposely, she stood. “I want to explore the caves, but we forgot to bring a lantern, so I suppose a walk around the outside will have to do.”

Jimmy smirked at her. “What do you mean, ‘we forgot a lantern’? I did nothing of the sort.”

He reached into a sack lying near his feet Maria had failed to notice and pulled out a small lantern. She shook her head, impressed with his forethought. “Well, Jimmy, you came prepared I see. I suppose you brought a meal as well?”

He beamed. “I certainly did, but that is for after we escape the caves alive.”

She laughed, her exhaustion forgotten. “We may starve to death only a few hundred feet from a perfectly good meal if you leave it out here. I suppose we ought to take it with us, lest we become lost and need it to ensure our survival.”

He tried to make his face serious, but the corners of his lips turned up involuntarily. “What if we meet some dangerous animal in there, though, and they are attracted to the scent of the provisions? I’m not sure we should risk that.”

The conversation was so silly, she could not keep a straight face, no matter how hard she tried. “We can simply throw some scraps to the animal, thereby distracting it as we make our escape.”

“Your logic is too sound for argument. We shall take the rations with us.”

He set the lantern on the rock, lit the wick, and shuttered it, leaving only a small swath of light to guide their way. He passed the light to her and grasped the bag, and together they walked into the cave.

As soon as they left the entryway, the lantern’s small beam became their only source of light. When Mary spoke, her voice bounced back in soft imitation. “You know, if we opened the shutters on the lantern, we would be able to see our surroundings instead of just the few feet ahead of us.”

“What’s the fun in that?” Jimmy countered.

Mary laughed and moved deeper into the cave, her feet confidently following the trails they had taken so many years ago. They wandered until they reached the end; the deep mysterious cave of their childhood in reality only went a few hundred feet into the mountain face. They laughed at the discovery, then turned back.

“I suppose we won’t lose our way and starve,” Jimmy commented.

Maria shook her head. “It will be long before noon when we step into daylight. Though we might as well eat sitting on that rock in the shade of the large oak. It will be a perfect spot for a picnic.”

“It’ll be just like old times, eating bread and cheese and sitting on that rock together.”

She thought of the way their arms and hips and legs had pressed together when they sat side-by-side on the rock and felt her face warm at the idea. Not precisely like old times.

Outside, they sat and ate, though she was not particularly hungry. It was warm and peaceful. At first they were quiet, but the constant press of him against her became too much again, and she started conversation to ease her mind off his body. “Tell me more about what you’re doing at the bank, Jimmy. Why are you here?”

He grasped the opportunity to focus himself on anything but her intoxicating presence with eagerness. “I work with the bank. The old manager is leaving, so I was sent to gather information about how the place runs and prepare everything for the new manager, so the transition will be smooth when he takes the reins. Once they choose someone to manage it, of course.”

As he spoke, he watched her, fascinated with the tiny shifts in her expression with every new word. Interest to concern to disappointment to hope, all in a few seconds. He wondered at the cause of each one. Concern for the old manager, most likely. Disappointment that someone else would become the new manager, perhaps? Hope that he might stay? The idea brought him a strange kind of joy.

Maria looked away from him, her eyes on the ground in front of her. “How long will you be in town, then?”

He looked at the patch of dirt, too. He didn’t want to see whatever expression that might flit across. “I’m not quite sure. Could be just a week, could be two or three. It’s a fairly simple assignment, and I’m mostly just taking notes to pass along to the new manager and reporting on it to San Francisco.”

There was a pause in the conversation. Jimmy tried not to fidget, but he felt like a child again, waiting for an adult to tell him what to do next. He sneaked a peek at Maria’s face, but it was hard to read. Her jaw was clenched, her lips a straight line. Was she unhappy or angry or simply thoughtful?

Finally, it softened, and she turned back to him. Her voice and face held nothing but interest, but her eyes were still dark with whatever emotion was lurking underneath. “Is this what you do all the time? You go to different towns and prepare things for new managers?”

“No, this is the first time I’ve ever done something like this. Usually I work in San Francisco at the main branch.”

A small spark lit her eyes, and the edges of her lips curled. He wasn’t sure why, but he hoped it was a signal that the awkward moment had passed. She said, “So the first time you were sent out to a town like this, it just happened to be Shasta? That’s an interesting coincidence.”

He grinned sheepishly. She’d caught him. “It wasn’t
exactly
a coincidence.”

He wondered if she would press the issue and force him to admit that he had not waited to be asked to take over the spot, but instead immediately gone to Mr. Wilde and explained that he needed to be the one to go to Shasta the moment he heard of the position.

The smile on her face grew, and she nodded, as if he’d explained enough for her to glean the entire story. Her face lit up, and he was struck again by her beauty and cleverness, all wrapped together in his old friend.

God, he wanted to kiss her. As he lost himself in her eyes, his heart began to beat harder, shouting for him to press his lips against hers. The thought of kissing her was a strange new emotion for him, but it was strong. Sparks of sensation flowed through him at the thought. It would be a simple thing, really. He needed only to lean over a few inches.

No. If she felt differently, a kiss would only ruin the friendship he had rediscovered, and he would not do that. Their time together the past two days was too important for that. He forced himself to break eye contact.

She shifted on the rock, and her hip slid along his, leaving a trail of fire in its wake. His body reacted so strongly to her. It was difficult to keep his mind on explaining the mundane details of life when everything about him sizzled at the thought of caressing her cheek, touching her silken hair, kissing her hard and long, feeling her body with his hands…

He attempted to hide the reactions of his body to his thoughts, turning away from her slightly to avoid embarrassment, even though there was hardly room to do so and caused his body to rub against hers even more. His reaction was neither appropriate nor brotherly, and he couldn’t let himself get carried away.

They had been together again for such a short time, scarcely more than a day. Still, he could not deny the electricity he felt when he was near her. He needed to hide his feelings for her until he was sure she felt something more than a simple brotherly affection for him.

Mary studied Jimmy while they talked, allowing herself to absorb the reality of his presence. He was a very attractive man, tall, and despite working as a bank manager, she could see that his body was strong and lean from working on the claims and whatever else he had done since they last saw each other.

She wondered if his pure male physique was the only reason for the fire in her veins, but her instincts told her there was more to it than that. She had met similar men, even gone upstairs with several of them, but she had never felt this way towards any other she had seen.

His countenance was what truly caused her heart to twist inside her. His strong jaw gave him an air of indomitable willpower, as if he could stand up to anything and anyone. His eyes, however, still glittered and danced with laughter, just like they had when they were young … or maybe they only looked like that when they were gazing at her.

She turned away, looking at the cave mouth and concentrating on her old memories. “I feel as though these caves are different, somehow, than they had been when I was a child.”

She could feel Jimmy’s gaze land on her, but chose to continue looking straight ahead. There was no doubt in her mind that her feelings had gone too far, and she needed to rein them in before they took over. She could not ruin this happy spark inside her that had been dormant for so long.

He responded with reminiscences from childhood, their many adventures and imaginings here. After a few minutes, his voice trailed off and he smiled at her. “I am glad things haven’t changed too much, Maria. You are a beautiful lady now, but you are still just as interesting as you were when we lived in the camps. It’s nice that those days are not gone forever.”

She flushed, and he felt his temperature rise at the sight. Sincere compliments were perhaps not the best way to avoid uncomfortable physical reactions. He changed to humorous recollections instead. “I bet you’re just as headstrong now as you used to be, too. Remember when you decided to run around the entire camp because you were bored, and halfway through forgot what you were doing because you found a mud pit and decided to play in it with a stray pup? My ma was so upset when you came in an hour after dark covered in mud. It was so amusing to watch you, in dirt from head to toe, try to explain why you were hours late.”

Mary laughed at the memory. “She just kept staring at me. I’m glad my father was sober enough to tell her to leave me alone and sent me back to our tent with a little supper, or I don’t know what she might have done. Your mother never hit me, but I think she got pretty close that night. I must admit, though, in some ways it was nice having somebody worry that much for me. How is she?”