Memoirs of a Girl Wolf (29 page)

              “What happened?” I asked.

              “Do you remember any of that? You just changed,” he said, kneeling over me.

              I sat up, hugging him, I squealed. “I did it! I did it. I was conscious.” He briefly hugged me back before jerking away and moving to the other side of the fire where he remained all night.

              My heart, my powerful heart that held all my strength and was desired by this new enemy, thudded in my chest. I was happy, excited. I had made great strides in my training and I felt safer than just a few minutes before. I felt more in control of myself and I felt strong, and I challenged any threat carrying a silver blade. I’d be ready.

27

              School started back up the same week of Reign’s seventeenth birthday. My brothers were officially moved out of our cozy cabin and into my grandparents split level home in Saginaw, Michigan. They didn’t put up much of a protest when Mom informed them of what I still believed to be a rather impulsive decision. They, like my grandparents, believed the lie they were told that Mom would be expanding her company of log cabin homes and working with clients all over North America. Because of her new clients, she would be gone a lot traveling and didn’t want me to take on the responsibility of taking care of my brothers longer than a weekend. I also think they went easily because they had each other. This was something that made me a little envious of Josh and Eric. As a twin, they always had the other and I often thought, especially now, how nice it would be to have someone who knew me that well and could be there walking through life with me. That was, I suppose, what Reign was supposed to be, but how could he be, when he didn’t even know where I went at night.

              Regardless, I did have Reign, and I also had Phoenix. They were yin and yang. Both provided something different, but positive to my life. Reign was still the boy next door who I was falling even more in love with every day, and Phoenix was quickly replacing Kristen as my new best friend. I felt like it was time to find a new person to fill the slot and although I regarded Reign as my best friend also, Phoenix was someone I could connect with differently and the only person I could connect with in this way. I couldn’t talk about wolf stuff with anyone else. Mom still refused to admit I was Morphic and she continued staying up all night searching the internet and tracking people down, daily. She told me she was close to a breakthrough, but it was effecting her. She stopped sleeping and eating. Her weight dropped, her hair went unwashed, her face appeared longer and pale, her spine curved, and she rarely changed out of her purple robe as she continued dropping clients and taking off from work, but she wouldn’t listen to my concerns, so I focused more on my training. 

              Phoenix and I had especially grown closer now that I was consciousness every night for longer periods of time. It was an amazing, exhilarating thrill. Tt felt similar to going upside down on a roller coaster, and I couldn’t get enough of it, but this was what Phoenix warned me of, especially in the beginning wolves can get addicted to the euphoria of the wolf state. They can get trapped as a wolf, and lose their soul, so it was important to only try to gain consciousness around Phoenix who could monitor me and introduce me to it a little bit at a time.

              I spent my days like this: Reign while the sun was out; Phoenix while the moon. Now, school was starting and we were headed into our last semester of our sophomore year, and I was struggling to keep up with my studies. I kept my struggle as best I could from Reign. I kept a lot from him. He noticed little things like during our drive into school, I’d fall asleep with my head resting on his shoulder, or at lunch I’d lay my head in my arms and doze a little. This confused him as to why I was so tired all the time and I blamed it on stress with my brothers leaving. I felt guilty, and I couldn’t meet his eyes when I told him these excuses. If he knew how much I lied to him, I didn’t know how he would take it.

              The first Friday we were back at school, we were walking out of Geometry together when Mrs. Gus called me to her desk. Reign waited by the door for me as I walked with my head down over to the short woman wearing a green cardigan and black pants covered in white cat hair.

              “Mickey, is everything okay?” she asked, folding her hands together under her pointy chin.

              “Yeah,” I said, reddening a little. I knew what this was about.

              “Because you failed the last two quizzes, and since November, your grade has slipped dramatically. Are you doing the homework problems I assign?” she asked as she adjusted the round, horn rimmed glasses on her nose.

              “Yeah, every night. I’m just not very good at math, I guess,” I said.

              “I help students after school from four to five. You should start coming,” she said, firmly.

              I frowned. “I really don’t think I can,” I said.

              “Why? Because of a job. School comes first, Mickey. I’m sure your mother would agree with me, but alright if you really, really can’t make it I suggest a tutor.” She turned in her chair and pointed to Reign who stood with his back to us. “Perhaps Mr. Meyers can assist.”

              I nodded and left her desk with my head still hung. I was humiliated and ashamed, but I remained calm. In the past, the public scolding by someone other than Mom may have caused me to cry, but I was becoming really good at controlling my emotions and remaining in a constant peaceful, tranquil state such as Phoenix had taught me, My only concern was that I was going to start appearing like an emotionless, blank statue like he did at times.

              I grabbed Reign by the elbow and led him out of the room and into the hall. We didn’t speak until we reached our lockers. I opened mine as he leaned against his and said, “So you’re failing math?”

              “What? You heard that?” I asked, slightly surprised. Mrs. Gus had a very soft voice and she was speaking quietly to me so that the other students wouldn’t hear as they left the room.

              “Yeah, I did,” he said, kind of surprised at himself. “But really what’s going on? A couple months ago you were helping me with my homework and now I’m supposed to tutor you?”

              I dropped my Geometry book. It fell to the bottom of the locker with a loud thud. “It got hard.” I shrugged.

              “Come over tomorrow and we’ll study for the test,” he said.

              I had been avoiding his house since Phoenix told me about Hunters. I still wasn’t positive Orgon was a Hunter. Before I worked myself up, I needed solid evidence and even then I wasn’t sure what my action would be? He was my boyfriend’s father. Would Phoenix really “eliminate” him and I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to someone Reign loved because of me. It was hard enough accepting and moving on from the fact that I had hurt a helpless, innocent teenage boy who had just been on a camping trip with his family. But if what Phoenix had told me was true and my life was in danger then what? What if Orgon was the Hunter Phoenix followed here? Did that mean Reign was a Hunter too? No. I couldn’t believe that. I wouldn’t.

I wouldn’t jump to any firm conclusions. I would remain skeptical. What added to my skepticism was the fact that he was tracking something in Canada, but he was back from the North and I didn’t want to be around him anyway whether he was a super a human Hunter or just an amateur one, he was searching for the animal who was responsible for the attack months ago and that animal was me. Since Mom liked Reign so much at Christmas, I kept inviting him over to my house and we spent most of our time in my attic hanging out or we went cross country skiing in the woods.

              “Why don’t you come over to my place,” I offered. “I’ll even bake you a cake for your birthday.”

              “My dad won’t be home,” he said. “I know he freaked out when you met him.”

              “He didn’t,” I mumbled.

              “It’s okay he does that people,” Reign said with a somewhat proud smile. “He can be intimidating. Will you come over tomorrow though?”

              I nodded. We were interrupted by the bell ringing through the now empty hallways which meant we were both late for our next class. Leaning forward, he kissed me on my forehead.

“You can still bake me cake,” he said, smiling, and then ran down the hall and disappeared into the gym for his PE class while I turned in the opposite direction for Health.

              So Saturday at noon I walked through the woods carrying a German chocolate cake that Mom and I made that morning.

              It took a little longer for me to make the walk just because there was so much fresh snow on the ground and it was still snowing large, fluffy snowflakes from the grew sky above. I wondered if Reign was sick of winter yet or if he still found the snow as beautiful and enchanting as the first snow fall when he held each other in the courtyard at lunch. January in Michigan meant about three more months of winter and soon all the beautiful white snow would turn to disgusting, depressing grey slush.

              When I arrived, I was disappointed to notice that next to Reign’s red truck was Orgon’s black truck twice the size of Reigns and behind both trucks was a green Eldorado that I didn’t recognize. For a few moments, I stood with my feet disappearing in the snow and wet snowflakes collecting on top of my head staring at the front door of the Gothic white and black house wondering if I should turn around and go home and make up an excuse to not come over, but as if my thoughts could be heard, the front door opened and Reign stepped onto the porch waving at me, smiling.

              I sighed and trudged forward, reluctantly, but hid my lack of enthusiasm by pulling my lips into a smile to match his and handing him the cake I said in cheery, hyper voice, “Happy birthday!”

              When he hugged me he said into my ear in a low voice, “Sorry, my dad’s here. They surprised me, but you’re just time in for lunch.”

             
They?

             
After following Reign into the house, I stood by myself in the entry way shrugging my coat off and stepping out of my boots while he disappeared into the kitchen where I heard laughter which to me was a good sign and put me in a better mood. I ran my fingers through my hair and waited for Reign to return. Phoebe sniffed me, then growled, then warmed up again, but barked at me. She couldn’t decide if I was a friend or threat.

              Reign came back into the room and snapped at her to go sit in the chair in the corner near the fire place. She obeyed. He scratched the back of neck, confused by her behavior. Seeing his bare neck caused me to flash back to the symbol I remembered seeing on Phoenix’s neck, but I didn’t have long to think about that because Reign put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me gently toward the kitchen.

              “My grandparents are here,” he said. Noticing my face tense up, he smiled warmly and said, “Don’t worry. Deep breath, here we go.” He pushed me through the door of the kitchen. We stood in the little room where an older woman with her iron hair done up in a loose French twist stood at the white farm sink with her back to us. The two men, Orgon and Thrice, sat at the round kitchen table. The three adults stopped laughing, and turned to look at me.

              From the kitchen sink, Maude turned off the faucet and walked up to me. She took both my hands in hers and squeezed. I felt immediately calm and comfortable. She was about my height. Her posture was slightly curved like her nose. Her lips were a plum shade and her cheeks glowed a soft pink. Her bright green eyes were hidden behind teal square glasses that slid down the bridge of her nose. Two hearing aids sat, tucked behind her ears. She reached up to adjust both of them after asking me my name.

              “Mickey,” I said.

              “Were you named after the mouse?” Thrice asked from where he sat at the table.

              I turned my attention from the beautiful older woman to her husband who upon setting eyes on him caused all the warmth and comfort I had felt meeting Maude evaporated within half a second. A shiver ran down my spine and my nostrils flared. Thrice made me feel similar to how Orgon made me feel. My instincts were telling me to guard myself and watch their movement closely. Thrice and Orgon laughed at his comment. The old man wore dirty jeans and a frayed checkered red shirt that was left unbuttoned. Underneath his shirt he wore a stained white t-shirt. His hair was an iron grey like Maude’s and it was full in the front and thin in the back. Coarse thick eyebrows grew above dark brown eyes set close together with a flat nose separating the two. His skin was rough and blotchy. A two inch scar ran across his left cheek.

              “No, my grandma,” I said, causing their laughter to cease.

              Maude had moved back to the sink where she continued rinsing dishes, I guessed from a lunch I had just missed.

              “Your grandma’s name was Mickey too?” Reign asked with genuine interest.

              I eyed him with sweet adoration. I wondered how he could not get the fearful feeling that I had when laying eyes upon these two men, but all Reign saw and felt was respect and pride. I was sure because he was raised by them. I wished the men would leave and I could just get to know Maude. She reminded me so much of Reign.

              “Her name was Michelle. My dad nicknamed me Mickey and it stuck,” I said, pausing a moment to think about my reply. I wondered why the childhood nick name had indeed stuck. Why did I continue to call myself by a name attributed to me by a parent who left? Michelle was his mother, but also a wolf and for the first time the name instilled me with some pride.