Maureen's Choice (16 page)

She paused, then continued. “You are a very fortunate woman. The last woman who disrespected General Suka remained in the tub overnight. In the morning her body was thrown in the river.”

At the mention of the General’s name Maureen began to tremble and felt her mind slipping into that cold dark place. Her skin once more felt the slimy leeches and the pin pricks of their teeth. She shuddered and looked blankly at the woman in the chair. Nancy reached out and patted her hand, “It’s all right, dear. It’s over now.”

“Oh, my God,” Maureen spoke softly, “it was horrible, unimaginably horrible.”

“That’s why you must take care to see that it doesn’t happen again. Even though the General promised the man in America that he would not kill you, I think, in a rage, he would.” She watched Maureen carefully. When she felt Maureen was receptive she began again. “Listen and remember. I’m going to tell you the rules. Follow them and you will survive. Make one small mistake and you will be back in the cell hanging from your feet above a tub filled with leeches.”

Maureen nodded. “Yes…yes, I’ll do what I’m told.”

“Good,” Nancy said. “The General demands from his bitches abject servitude, absolute obedience, and unconditional worship.” Maureen remembered those words from the night before. Nancy continued, “You must never stand in the presence of the General. When he appears you must drop immediately to your knees, place your hands behind your neck, lock your fingers, and bow your head. If he acknowledges you and points to the floor, you’re to lie flat keeping your hands locked behind your head. If he orders you to crawl on your belly you remain in that position and push yourself with your toes. If he orders you to crawl on your hands and knees you crawl on your hands and knees. If he says ‘doggie’ you lower your face and breasts to the floor and raise your ass as high as possible. If he orders you to kiss, or lick, or suck, or spread, or tongue, or drink, or pee, or shit, you do what he says quickly and without a word.” She looked at Maureen waiting for a response.

“I understand,” Maureen said.

“I’m not convinced that you do. Anything less than abject servitude will condemn you. The General is no fool. If he suspects the adoration is not real you will suffer and may die. Whatever your thoughts and feelings were regarding the General must change. You must make your mind accept him as Godlike, infinitely superior to you and to any man you may know. You must make your body feel it.”

Maureen frowned, “I don’t know if…” she began.

“Do you wish to live?”

“Yes…yes, of course, but…”

“When you are in the presence of the General remember the tub and the filthy water and the leeches. Know that he has the power of life and death over thousands of people in this province. Accept and be grateful that you are a slave in his service. Learn and learn quickly that your purpose, your only purpose is to please him.” She leaned over and took Maureen by the shoulders. “You must, dear girl, you absolutely must.” From a drawer in the table she took a large photograph of the face of General Suka and held it up to Maureen who gasped and drew back. The huge round head, the wide flat nose, the hanging jowls, the bulging frog eyes, the thick pendulous lips made her tremble with fear and loathing. Nancy pulled a stand over to the foot of the bed. She placed the photograph on it and directed a light onto the photo. She pulled heavy drapes across the window so that the room was in darkness except for the illuminated photograph. She stood beside it. The General will send for you in a few hours. I’ll come back an hour before you’re to go to him to prepare you. Till then, stare at the photograph and tell yourself that he is your master and that you are nothing. Tell yourself that you are the most fortunate of women because he has accepted you as his white bitch. Convince yourself, Mrs. O’Donnel, convince yourself. Your life depends on it.”

Maureen was surprised that the woman knew her married name. Nancy turned to go. “Wait,” Maureen called out. Nancy turned back. Maureen leaned forward in the bed, “How long have you been here?”

“Twenty-five years,” Nancy said flatly. “I’ve been serving the General for twenty-five years. I have felt the leeches and am very familiar with the whip.” She turned and Maureen heard the door close behind her.

As she stared at the photograph she was sure her fear of the General would cause her to obey but she wasn’t at all certain she could perform abject servitude and worship him unconditionally. Those things seemed impossible and insane. But in a short time the bulging eyes seemed to burn into her soul. The face not like the benevolent God of her Christian faith, but like the manifestation of some primitive all-powerful unforgiving God, perhaps the Devil Himself! Yes, in this part of Africa The General ruled over Life and Death. It was true that she was absolutely terrified of him but merging with that fear without diminishing it was a profound respect. No, “respect” wasn’t the right word to describe it. “Awe” came closer.

It seemed perverse to imagine herself truly grateful to kneel at the feet of this sadistic monster, but the longer she stared at the photograph the more she felt her

spirit absorbed by it. She thought, ‘to be General Suka’s white bitch, to find pleasure only in serving him’. She smiled for the first time since she’d arrived in Africa.

As soon as Nancy entered the room and glanced at Maureen, she knew the hypnotic eyes of the General had once more brought about the desired result. For some time now it amused her to observe the condescending attitude of foreign intellectuals when they found themselves here in the cradle of life. The blacks of Africa, the Aborigines of Australia, the Eskimo tribes of Alaska, the dark skinned races of South America and those of Siberia all were aware of mystical truths the whites hadn’t yet begun to perceive. Nancy was, therefore, not surprised to see the look of adoration in Maureen’s eyes as she stared at the photograph of General Suka. Nancy nodded her head and found pleasure in the thought that this black haired beauty might survive after all.

She removed the photograph. Maureen shut her eyes for a moment, then opened them blinking.

“Do you fear the General?” she asked.

Just the sound of his title caused her to feel for a moment, the black water closing over her head and the leeches swarming to her body. She looked at Nancy who saw the alarm in her eyes, “Yes, oh yes, I’m terrified of him.”

“What about devotion?” Nancy asked, “Do you feel devotion? Are you prepared to offer yourself to him in abject servitude?”

Maureen frowned trying to assess her feelings and respond with honest answers, “Yes, I think so. I think I may now have begun to feel devotion.” Nancy waited for her to finish. Maureen bowed her head for a moment then looked up. “And…and…to give myself to him in abject servitude.”

Nancy pointed to the table and mirror. “Make yourself beautiful for your Master,” she said. Maureen was naked under the single sheet. She looked at the brightly colored African moo moo Nancy wore. Nancy shook her head. Unless the General orders it, you are to be naked at all times, except for these.” She held up a pair of five inch black leather heels and a black leather collar.

“Naked?” Maureen questioned.

“To be naked serves two purposes. You have a beautiful body that now belongs to the General. He can show you off in the way he might a pretty vase or a fine horse. Secondly, it serves as a reminder to you and all who see you that you

are a slave and as such may be used and abused and humiliated by anyone however they wish.”

As her situation became clearer, Maureen began to realize she would be viewed as less than the lowest scullery maid in General Suka’s kitchen. ‘The General’s white bitch’ meant just what it said. She would be trained as his obedient pet, crawling beside him on hands and knees, kneeling next to his chair, perhaps scurrying to bring his slippers to him in her mouth.

Nancy interrupted her thoughts. “Prepare yourself. You must never keep your Master waiting.”

Embarrassed to be naked before Nancy, Maureen crossed to the small table and sat in front of the mirror. How often, she wondered, in the past few months had she brushed her hair and carefully applied her makeup in an effort to please any one of the dozens of black men who dominated her? She bent down to paint her toenails and then reapplied the red polish to her fingernails. She was pleased to see a container of perfumed oil among the expensive cosmetics. She stood with her back to Nancy and rubbed the jasmine scented oil over her body, noting that the marks of the whip were almost gone. She darkened her lashes. Among the variety of lipsticks she chose a bright red, careful to exaggerate the fullness of her lips. Over them she spread a coating of gloss. After vigorously brushing her lustrous black hair, she turned to face Nancy.

The older woman nodded approval. “Now, use a lighter shade of red to rouge your nipples. The General has commented on them pleased that they are both smooth and quite long, not to mention easily aroused.” Maureen’s nipple stiffened the moment she touched the lipstick tube to it.

Nancy smiled as she handed Maureen the stilettos. After Maureen had wiggled her tiny feet into them, Nancy held out the leather collar. Embedded in it was a black “O” ring. She fitted the collar around Maureen’s neck and snapped it shut at the back with a locking device. “Stand up,” she said. When Maureen stood facing her, she fastened a three foot length of black chain to the “O” ring. It hung down between Maureen’s breasts and ended a few inches below her shaved crotch. “You are not to remove it,” Nancy said. “We’re to wait here until you are summoned.” She crossed the room to sit in the chair next to the bed.

Maureen sat at the makeup table and looked into the mirror. The face that stared back at her was not the face she’d prepared to meet Travis or even Big Daddy. A change she couldn’t quite find words for had occurred. The long dark eyelashes, thin arched eyebrows, pale flawless skin, high cheekbones, full bright red lips that glistened, rich black hair that framed her oval face all combined to give her a sophisticated exotic look that in no way appeared cheap. She decided the difference from when she was preparing to meet Travis was in her eyes. At those times her eyes were bright with anticipation and excitement. Now, they stared back at her dully, lifeless, fearful and defeated.

She turned away from the mirror toward Nancy who nodded approval. “In addition to the rules about kneeling and crawling in the presence of the General, there are others you must observe. When you are with your Master you must never speak unless he asks you a question. If someone else says something to you or asks you a question, you must look to your Master for permission to speak. If he doesn’t give it, you’re to remain silent. It should be clear to everyone at all times that you speak only with permission of the General. Do you understand?”

“Yes.” She looked down at her hands that were folded on her bare thighs then back at Nancy. “May I ask you a question?” Nancy nodded. “Why have you stayed? Surely in twenty-five years you would have had opportunities to escape.”

Nancy smiled slightly, “I was twenty-seven years old when they took me. I was an only child and grew up in a small farming village in Iowa. My mother and father were very religious. The three of us attended church services every Sunday and again on Wednesday evenings. I was considered very pretty.” She paused for a moment before continuing, “A week before I was to be married to my childhood sweetheart, they took me. I’d gone down to the main road to fetch a calf that had gotten through the fence. They came by in a big car that stopped a little way ahead then backed up. Three men, white men, grabbed me and drugged me. Like you, I woke up here. The General was young then too, thirty-seven and as powerful as he is now. When he raped me, I was a virgin.” She stopped for a moment as if remembering. “To answer your question; for the first five years I was too frightened to try to escape. Besides, here in the middle of Africa where would I go? After five years I’d become accustomed to life here and…and…” She hesitated. “And, although I hated the General’s depravity, his cruelty, I’d gradually begun to feel…to feel…I don’t know what to call it. To feel a need, I guess. Yes, I began to feel a need for what he gave me, a need for what he calls abject servitude.” She shook her head, “Isn’t that strange?”

A light above the door blinked on and off. Nancy pointed to it. “That’s a signal. When you see it blink like that, you’re to go immediately to the General. There’s a speaker next to it. He will tell you where to find him. Right now we’re to join him in the bidding room.” Nancy took the end of Maureen’s leash and led her down a long hallway. Since Nancy’s feet were bare, the only sound was the click of Maureen’s heels on the polished hardwood floor. They paused before a heavy oak door. Maureen began to tremble. The thought of seeing the General again terrified her. Nancy pointed to the floor. Maureen got to her hands and knees. The door swung open and, with Nancy still holding the leash, Maureen crawled across the back of the room to where General Suka was sitting. Nancy and the General exchanged glances. Nancy nodded and directed Maureen to a space between the General’s chair and the one next to it. She gave the leash a slight tug. Maureen got to her knees and placed her hands behind her neck, squared her shoulders and looked straight ahead. Nancy let go of the leash that fell between Maureen’s bare breasts and parted thighs.

“Look up at me,” the General said. Fearfully Maureen tilted her head to look at him. The huge black face was just as it had been in the photograph, the bulging eyes as penetrating, as fierce, as hypnotic. For a moment she felt as if she might faint. She was vaguely aware of several other men sitting at the side of the General in a row of what appeared to be upholstered chairs. “Tell these gentlemen who you are and where you’re from,” he said.

Not taking her eyes from his face, she said, “My name is Maureen O’Donnel. I’m from Cleveland, Ohio, in the United States.” He waited. “I’m the General’s white bitch,” she added.

“Tell them why you’re here.” She frowned, looking puzzled. “What have you come five thousand miles to beg me to permit you to do?” Maureen felt her face turn red. She wanted to look away but couldn’t. “Speak, damn you!” he shouted,