Mating Instinct: A Moon Shifter Novel (19 page)

The feel of his heat in her made her toes curl along with the remnants of the orgasm still spinning through her. And when she felt his teeth dig into the soft area where her neck and shoulder met, she let out another cry of pleasure until she was panting and barely able to move.

As he pulled out, he wrapped an arm around her waist. Holding her tight against him, he softly nuzzled her neck. For an instant she wondered what it would be like to bond with him. For him to take her from behind under the full moon and sink his canines into her flesh, linking them forever. Linking them so that nothing would ever separate them except death. Just as quickly she banished the thought. Thinking about something that would never happen would only bring her a bitter agony she wasn’t prepared to deal with. Not now, not ever.

When her knees threatened to give way, he held her tighter for a moment, then moved toward the built-in bench. Despite the heated water rushing over them, the tile was cool beneath her as she sat.

Before she could ask him what he was doing, he grabbed her bottle of shampoo. As he started to wash her hair with hands so gentle that her insides twisted, she could feel those traitorous tears begin to fill her eyes again. She turned back toward the tile and let him get the back of her hair. She absolutely refused to cry in front of him. Not again.

It would be so easy to lean into him and let the tears fall. To let him hold her and ask him why he’d told her that he loved her. Ask him why he hadn’t been willing to bond with her before. But the words stuck in her throat. She wasn’t ready for the answers, so she wasn’t going to ask those questions. If he told her she hadn’t been good enough as a human, it would crush her soul. And if he told her that he might love her but they still had no future—and she really couldn’t see Jayce settling down—living with that knowledge would slice her right open.

Right now she would just take the time she’d been offered with Jayce. It was enough for her. It had to be. She knew him—he would be leaving soon enough.

Chapter 13

J
ayce stared at Kat’s back as she pulled a long-sleeved black T-shirt over her head. As all that expanse of smooth skin disappeared from sight, he resisted sighing. She wasn’t wearing a bra.

“You not wearing a bra on purpose?” The question slipped out before he could stop himself. It didn’t matter why she wasn’t wearing one, just that she wasn’t. Fewer clothes for him to take off of her later.

She looked over her shoulder as she pulled her hair free from her shirt, her hair a dark, silky waterfall that he wanted to run his fingers through. It was still damp from their recent shower. Her cheeks tinged pink and she shrugged as she bent to tug her jeans on. “What do you think?”

“I think it’s an interesting choice.”

She rolled her eyes but her cheeks flushed an even darker shade. “Losing it later seems like a foregone conclusion.” He started to say she should just go naked, but she shook her head. “Don’t even think about suggesting I start running around here without any clothes on.”

“It would save us a lot of time,” he murmured. He’d planned to go to the ranch to train Erin and Kat hours ago, but after last night he had known it wasn’t going to happen. He was taking the day off. Well, a couple of hours off this morning. He craved spending more time alone with Kat. Just the two of them. He needed it on a level he wasn’t yet willing to admit.

If he could he’d take off all day—hell, all week. He would, but after this morning he needed to check in with Brianna to see how her infiltration was going and then he wanted to sit down with Leila and figure out what he was going to do with her. By her cedar scent and eye color—which was so rare among their kind—he had a feeling she was like him, was perhaps an enforcer. But it was too soon to tell. Those were just a couple of signs she might be one of them. He needed to see how she fought. How she moved, how quickly she learned.

After that, if he had time he might take a trip into Winston-Salem to check out one of the names that dealer had given him. Jayce had wanted to wait to see if that laptop gave him anything useful, but mainly he knew that once he went he’d probably be staying there for a few days while he got familiar with the territory. Leaving Kat right now wasn’t something he was willing to do, not even for his job. He simply couldn’t.

When Kat pulled a pair of socks out of one of the drawers of an antique-looking dresser, he paused. “What are you doing?”

“Uh, what does it look like?” she asked without turning around.

“Like you’re putting on far too many clothes.” His inner wolf snapped at him, telling him to strip her and take her again.

“I promised Leila I’d be there for breakfast this morning. She looked so lost yesterday I don’t want to disappoint her.”

“Oh.” Kat’s big heart was one of the reasons he loved her, but his own heart ached at the lack of her reciprocation from his stupid admission last night. What had he been thinking? The more time that elapsed after what he’d said, the bigger the ache inside him grew. He’d thought he would be okay with simply her body and her affection, but damn. That would never be enough. But how could he ask her for more when he wasn’t sure they even had a chance together? How could he ask her to be his when she would then become an instant target for the hundreds of enemies he’d made over the centuries? She’d been through more than enough already. He wouldn’t place her in danger ever again.

Unfortunately he’d already made a mistake this morning by marking her in the shower with his teeth. His inner wolf liked it, and even though he didn’t want to admit it, so did he. He hadn’t planned to do it, but it had happened and he wasn’t sorry. It wasn’t permanent—only bonding would be—but he’d marked her so that any paranormal creature would know that she was taken. That she belonged to him. Was it selfish? Hell, yeah. He just couldn’t work up any remorse. If she found out what he’d done . . . He swallowed hard. For some reason he couldn’t think straight around her. Not that it was anyone’s fault but his. He should have asked her first. Better yet, he shouldn’t have done it at all. But he’d let his primal side take over and his most primal side wanted Kat forever.

Her husky voice cut into his thoughts. “Don’t give me that sad-sounding ‘oh.’ I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time later to . . . you know.”

“No, I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me?” He wanted her to spell it out for him. She always blushed when she talked dirty and it turned him on like nothing else could. The way she turned red always reminded him of their first time together. He’d spent hours working her up until she was panting and ready for him, so he’d gone down on her for quite a while. At first she’d been embarrassed that he wanted to kiss her between her legs. Her entire face had flushed crimson, but after that first climax, embarrassment had been the last thing on her mind.

“Whatever.” She shook her head as she zipped up her boots. “I’ll let you grope me during training . . . Oh, maybe I will wear a bra,” she said absently and opened the top dresser drawer.

“No training today.” He would just switch his intended schedule around, handle everything this morning and take part of the afternoon off.

She whipped around, sports bra in hand. “Why not?”

He shrugged and had to resist walking over to her, pulling her into his arms, and heading right back to bed. “I’ve got some stuff to do, and most of it involves you naked.”

“You can’t just cancel everything. . . . Well, I guess you can,” she murmured and he noticed the way her nipples tightened under her sweater. When that classic rose scent of her lust intensified, rolling off her in a deep wave, he grinned and didn’t bother restraining himself. It was her natural scent, but when she was turned on it was much stronger. His legs quickly ate up the distance between them until he was grabbing her hips and pulling her tight against him.

It soothed him that she didn’t argue about taking the day off and that she hadn’t been acting different around him this morning. She’d gotten into the shower without him—when she’d thought he was sleeping—and he hadn’t been sure what kind of reception he’d get when he joined her. She’d been more than willing, though, so he couldn’t ask for more. Well, he could and he would, but in time.

He still wasn’t sure what the hell he could do with his feelings for her. Shoving them away again wasn’t an option. He’d walked away from her once and he didn’t know how he could do it again. Especially since he’d marked her. Fuck, what had he been thinking? He hadn’t. That was the problem. Around her, coherent thought took a vacation. His feelings were all fucked up. He’d never had trouble focusing on his job before, but now . . . Kat changed everything.

He hadn’t bothered with a shirt because he’d known it was unlikely they’d make it out of the bedroom before making love at least once more, and as she ran her hands up his bare chest, he covered her mouth with his.

Hungrily he teased her lips open, invading her mouth with his tongue. His hips jerked almost involuntarily against her, pressing his erection against her lower abdomen.

She made a low moaning sound that cut straight through him. Grasping the bottom of her T-shirt, he paused only when he heard the insistent buzz of his phone dancing across the nightstand. He wanted to ignore it. Should ignore it.

Kat pulled back first. “Go on. You don’t know who it could be and we need to head to the ranch.” There was something in her eyes that he didn’t want to acknowledge.

Not relief exactly, but damn close. His phone buzzed again. “Yeah,” he answered on a snarl.

“Don’t come to the ranch today.” Connor’s voice was quiet.

A burst alarm of jumped inside him. “Why?”

“Cops are here. There were three murders yesterday. First at a trailer park, a lone man in the middle of the day was ripped apart
inside
his home. Guess he didn’t check in with his parole officer or he wouldn’t have been found so quickly. The second attack happened last night—two males. APL members.”

“All of them killed by a shifter?” Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Kat straighten, but he didn’t turn toward her. She would be able to hear the entire conversation since her senses were more sharpened now.

“Yeah. Bodies were definitely ripped apart by a shifter, according to Parker. Same teeth imprints as the first attack.” Connor’s voice was grim.

Shifters had larger jaws and teeth than their regular animal counterparts. Not to mention that the first human had been attacked inside his house. And now it seemed as if yet another human had been attacked the same way. The likelihood of those attacks being from an animal was slim, so if the imprints were the same for the second attack, it seemed like a good assumption it was a shifter. “What’re the cops doing?”

“DNA tests. They’ve got a court order for everyone who lives here. I know you’re not a member of the pack and don’t live here, but . . .”

“I got it.” If he was there they might attempt to test him and that sure as hell wasn’t happening. Not without a fight and that would just get messy. “Did you learn anything?”

“Humans must forget we can overhear everything. They only said the first attack took place inside a trailer, but they didn’t mention a location or other specifics. The attack on the bikers took place behind that biker bar you and Erin busted up a month and a half ago.”

“I’m on it.”

“Call me the second you figure out anything. I know they’re going to be watching the ranch after this, so I’m keeping everyone under lockdown for the time being, but if need be we can get away for backup.”

“Good idea. I’ll be in contact.” He disconnected and turned to meet Kat’s worried gaze.

“Do you think anyone at the ranch was responsible for this?” There was uncertainty in her voice.

He shook his head. It didn’t make sense, though at this point he couldn’t rule anything out. “No, but at least we’ve got a lead.” For a moment his gaze dipped to the outline of her breasts. Some days he wondered what it would be like if he had a normal job—then he quickly dismissed that thought. He’d be bored out of his mind. “Get dressed. You’re coming with me.”

Her pale blue eyes lit up. “I am?”

There was no way Jayce was leaving her behind. She was his to protect. “I know you heard that conversation, so pack a gun. If you don’t have one, I’ve got extra. Or you can use one of my blades.” He’d never made that offer to anyone and never would again. Showing Kat how he felt about her by offering up something so important to him was the only way he knew how to communicate. Telling her what she meant to him wouldn’t do a damn thing anyway. Clearly. He’d told her he loved her and she hadn’t responded. Maybe she needed to
see
how serious he was.

Now her eyes widened. “You serious?”

He shrugged as he turned on his heel, heading for the door. “Be ready in two minutes. I want to get out of here in case the cops decide to come sniffing around December’s house.”

By the time Jayce made it downstairs Kat was already waiting for him, wearing a thick black jacket belted over her dark jeans along with knee-high boots. He saw the faint outline of a gun at her back before she turned to him. A very small gun, likely a.380. Or that’s what she’d had back when they’d been together—a gift from her father. The lightweight weapon had an easy grip and was made to be concealable. He’d seen her at the range and knew she had no problem wielding it. Her accuracy was beyond impressive.

“Ready?”

Kat nodded, her arms crossed over her chest. It wasn’t overt, but he could almost sense her pulling away from him. In the subtle way she stood by the front door, there was almost an invisible wall between them. It was thin, but if he didn’t do something about it now she’d keep building layers.

He knew her too well. And he refused to let her do that to him. To them. Grabbing her hips, he tugged her close.

She let out a yelp of surprise, her fingers splaying against his chest to balance herself. She opened her mouth, but he didn’t let her speak. Just crushed his mouth over hers in a move that was purely meant to dominate.

Eventually he pulled back and she stared up at him, breathless and looking more than a little dazed. “What was that for?”

“You don’t get to walk away from me. Not after you let me back in your life. Don’t think that’s an option,” he growled.

She blinked once. “I wasn’t—”

“No walls between us. And no lies.”

Kat was silent for a long beat, and he could hear her racing heart. Her eyes narrowed slightly. “No lies?”

He nodded.

“So you won’t be telling me any more giant lies like the one about shifters and bonding?”

He shook his head. Of course she’d bring that up. She had every right, but he didn’t want to fight with her this morning and he didn’t want to explain why he’d lied to her. She would just argue with him, convinced that she was right. Maybe, deep down in a place he couldn’t even acknowledge, he knew he should have given her a choice and told her the truth. But letting her knowingly make herself a target? He shuddered at the thought. “No more lies,” he ground out.

“Good to know.” Jayce waited for her to continue, but she stepped out of his embrace and grasped the door handle. “We should get out of here.”

Growling under his breath, he stepped in front of her. Male shifters always went out first. It was a matter of checking for danger. Back when they’d been dating it had driven her crazy, until he’d explained what he was doing. Sending a female into an unknown situation made no sense and he didn’t understand the human tradition of males letting females walk into buildings first.

As he glanced around the quiet neighborhood with a newly fallen layer of frosty snow on the ground, Kat brushed past him, pure attitude rolling off her.

He wasn’t sure what was going on in that head of hers, but he liked watching the sway of her ass as she headed for his bike.

Wordlessly she put on the helmet he handed to her and snapped the tinted visor in place, blocking his view of her eyes. Sighing, he slid in front of her and savored the feel of her arms wrapped around him as he pulled out of the driveway. When she pressed her breasts tight against his back he figured he could deal with her anger as long as she was in his life.