Mating in Captivity (33 page)

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Authors: Esther Perel

Tags: #Health & Fitness, #Sexuality, #Social Science, #Sociology, #General, #Relationships, #Dating, #Sex

BOOK: Mating in Captivity
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autonomy and,
(i)

James and Stella,
(i)

ruthlessness and,
(i)

selfishness and,
(i)

children.
See
parenthood

Chodorow, Nancy,
(i)

Christine and Ryan, work ethic and,
(i)

comfort love,
(i)

Coral and Jed, domination and,
(i)

cultural values domination and submission and,
(i)
,
(ii)

intimacy and,
(i)

parenthood and,
(i)

Puritanism and hedonism and,
(i)
,
(ii)

de Beauvoir, Simone,
(i)

democracy in relationships.
See
domination and submission

domination and submission,
(i)

cultural values and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Elizabeth and Vito and,
(i)

hate and love and,
(i)

Jed and Coral and,
(i)

Marcus and,
(i)

power and,
(i)

sadomasochism and,
(i)

Dominick and Raoul, intentionality and,
(i)

Doug and Zoë and Naomi, fidelity and,
(i)

Dylan, childhood and desire,
(i)

Eddie and Noriko, intimacy and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Elizabeth and Vito, domination and,
(i)

emotional space,
(i)

entrapment, intimacy and,
(i)

Epstein, Mark,
(i)

equality.
See
domination and submission

Eric and Jaxon, fidelity and,
(i)

erotic vitality, security and,
(i)

Adele and Alan and,
(i)
,
(ii)

anchor and wave and,
(i)

Charles and Rose and,
(i)

fidelity and,
(i)

need for,
(i)

romantics and realists and,
(i)

uncertainty and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Eyes Wide Shut
(film),
(i)

familiarity, intimacy and,
(i)

family influences.
See
childhood lessons

fantasies,
(i)

changing attitudes toward,
(i)
,
(ii)

forms of,
(i)

Joni and Ray and,
(i)

lack of communication about,
(i)

Nat and Amanda and,
(i)

sharing of,
(i)

the Third and,
(i)

Feeling Strong
(Person),
(i)

Fiddler on the Roof
(film),
(i)
,
(ii)

fidelity,
(i)

autonomy and,
(i)

disclosures of infidelity,
(i)

Doug and Zoë and Naomi and,
(i)

new meanings of,
(i)
,
(ii)

reasons for infidelity,
(i)

security and,
(i)

the Third and,
(i)

Fisher, Helen,
(i)
,
(ii)

Frank, Katherine,
(i)

Franklin, Benjamin,
(i)

Friday, Nancy,
(i)

Fromm, Erich,
(i)

Gafni, Mordechai,
(i)

Giddens, Anthony,
(i)
,
(ii)
,
(iii)

goals.
See
work ethic

Godwin, Gail,
(i)

Goldner, Virginia,
(i)

Gopnik, Adam,
(i)

Guillebaud, Jean-Claude,
(i)

hate, love and,
(i)

hedonism, Puritanism and,
(i)

cultural ambivalence about sexuality and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Maria and Nico and,
(i)

Ratu and,
(i)

teenage sexuality and,
(i)

“himbos,”
(i)

“hooking up,”
(i)

Hoover, J. Edgar,
(i)

Hot Monogamy
(Love),
(i)

Huizinga, Johan,
(i)

Ian and Marguerite, fidelity and,
(i)

independence

economic,
(i)

emotional,
(i)

infidelity.
See
fidelity intentionality, marriage and,
(i)

intimacy, pitfalls of modern,
(i)
.

See also
intimacy, sexuality and cultural changes and,
(i)

Eddie and Noriko and,
(i)
,
(ii)

mind-body continuum and,
(i)

Mitch and Laura and,
(i)

“talk” intimacy and,
(i)

intimacy, sexuality and,
(i)
.
See also
intimacy, pitfalls of modern entrapment and,
(ii)

familiarity and,
(i)

Jimmy and Candace and,
(i)

John and Beatrice and,
(i)
,
(ii)

separateness and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Jacqueline and Philip, marriage and,
(i)

James and Stella, childhood and,
(i)

Jaxon and Eric, fidelity and,
(i)

Jed and Coral, domination and,
(i)

Jimmy and Candace, intimacy and,
(i)

John and Beatrice, intimacy and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Johnson, Barry,
(i)

Joni and Ray, fantasy and,
(i)

Julie, parenthood and,
(i)

Kipnis, Laura,
(i)
,
(ii)

Laura and Mitch, intimacy and,
(i)

Lena, childhood and desire,
(i)

Leo and Carla,
(i)

love

anxiety and,
(i)

hate and,
(i)

illusion of committed,
(i)

two pillars of,
(i)

Love, Patricia,
(i)

Marcus, submission and,
(i)

Marguerite and Ian, fidelity and,
(i)

Maria and Nico, Puritanism and,
(i)

marriage,
(i)

absence of eroticism in,
(i)

Dominick and Raoul and,
(i)

illusion of committed love,
(i)

intentionality and,
(i)

Jacqueline and Philip and,
(i)

play and,
(i)

spontaneity and,
(i)

use of term,
(i)

Melinda, childhood and desire,
(i)

Men in Love
(Friday),
(i)

Merkin, Daphne,
(i)

Miller, Michael Vincent,
(i)

mind-body continuum,
(i)
Mindfulness Yoga
(Boccio),
(ii)

Mitch and Laura, intimacy and,
(i)

Mitchell, Stephen,
(i)
,
(ii)
,
(iii)
,
(iv)
,
(v)
,
(vi)

monogamy.
See
fidelity
Monogamy
(Phillips),
(i)
,
(ii)

Morin, Jack,
(i)
,
(ii)
,
(iii)

Naomi and Doug and Zoë, fidelity and,
(i)

Nat and Amanda, fantasy and,
(i)

Nico and Maria, Puritanism and,
(i)

Nin, Anaïs,
(i)

Noriko and Eddie, intimacy and,
(i)
,
(ii)

O’Connor, Dagmar,
(i)
,
(ii)

Open to Desire
(Epstein),
(i)

Paglia, Camille,
(i)

parenthood,
(i)

changes of,
(i)
,
(ii)

cult status of children and,
(i)

cultural differences and,
(i)

fathers and,
(i)

mothers and,
(i)

Stephanie and Warren and,
(i)
,
(ii)

parents, influence of.
See
childhood lessons

Paris to the Moon
(Gopnik),
(i)

Passionate Marriage
(Schnarch),
(i)

patterns, intimacy and,
(i)

Paz, Octavio,
(i)
,
(ii)
,
(iii)
,
(iv)
,
(v)

Person, Ethel Spector,
(i)
,
(ii)

Philip and Jacqueline, marriage and,
(i)

Phillips, Adam,
(i)
,
(ii)
,
(iii)
,
(iv)

play, marriage and,
(i)

Polarity Management: Identifying and Managing Unsolvable Problems
(Johnson),
(i)

power.
See
domination and submission

Proust, Marcel,
(i)

Puritanism, hedonism and,
(i)

cultural ambivalence about sexuality and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Maria and Nico and,
(i)

Ratu and,
(i)

teenage sexuality and,
(i)

Quantification of sexuality,
(i)

Raoul and Dominick, intentionality and,
(i)

Ratu, Puritanism and,
(i)

Ray and Joni, fantasy and,
(i)

realists, security and,
(i)

Reibstein, Janet,
(i)

Renee, parenthood and,
(i)

Robbins, Anthony,
(i)

Roiphe, Anne,
(i)

romantics, security and,
(i)

Rose and Charles, security and erotic vitality,
(i)

Rubin, Lillian,
(i)

Ryan and Christine, work ethic and,
(i)

sadomasochism (S-M),
(i)

Saint-Exupéry, Antoine de,
(i)

Salomé, Jacque,
(i)

Scheinkman, Michele,
(i)

Schnarch, David,
(i)

Second Sex, The
(de Beauvoir),
(i)

security, erotic vitality and,
(i)

Adele and Alan and,
(i)
,
(ii)

anchor and wave and,
(i)

Charles and Rose and,
(i)

fidelity and,
(i)

need for,
(i)

romantics and realists and,
(i)

uncertainty and,
(i)
,
(ii)

self and others, childhood and balancing of,
(i)

autonomy and,
(i)

James and Stella,
(i)

ruthlessness and,
(i)

selfishness and,
(i)

Semans, Anne,
(i)

separateness, intimacy and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Serena and Andrew, intimacy and,
(i)

Sexy Mamas
(Winks and Semans),
(i)

Simon, Carly,
(i)

spontaneity, myth of,
(i)

Stella and James, childhood and,
(i)

Stephanie and Warren, parenthood and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Steven, childhood and desire and,
(i)

“story,” sex separated from,
(i)

submission and domination,
(i)

cultural values and,
(i)
,
(ii)

Elizabeth and Vito and,
(i)

hate and love and,
(i)

Jed and Coral and,
(i)

Marcus and,
(i)

power and,
(i)

sadomasochism and,
(i)

surrender, love and,
(i)

“talk intimacy,”
(i)

Talmud, story from,
(i)

teenage sexuality, Puritanism and,
(i)

Tiefer, Leonore,
(i)

Transformation of Intimacy, The
(Giddens),
(i)

uncertainty, erotic vitality and,
(i)
,
(ii)

values.
See
cultural values verbal communication, as modern intimacy,
(i)
.
See also
intimacy, sexuality and cultural changes and,
(ii)

Eddie and Noriko and,
(i)
,
(ii)

mind-body continuum and,
(i)

Mitch and Laura and,
(i)

verbal communication, as modern intimacy (
cont
.)

“talk” intimacy and,
(i)

Vito and Elizabeth, domination and,
(i)

Warren and Stephanie, parenthood and,
(i)
,
(ii)

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