Master of My Mind BN (31 page)

Tony sobered and reached up to tuck a
strand of hair behind my ear.
“Baby, since you’ve come into my life,
I’ve had an awakening of sorts. Fulfilling the needs of pain sluts has lost its
appeal. So there’s no need for you to feel an ounce of guilt over
my
choices. I’m not going to resent you coming
into my life…ever. Trust me. I’m a thousand times more complete inflicting
sweet agony on you, sweetheart.”

Rolling me beneath him, Tony kissed me with a passion so
reverent and full of promise it made my toes curl. Gliding his mouth down the
column of my throat, he nipped and growled as he worked his way to my nipples.
Dragging his tongue from one beaded tip to the next, I threaded my fingers in
his hair and tossed my head back. Soft moans tickled the back of my throat as I
arched, offering my breasts to him, to tease, torment, and devour.

A low curse tore from his lips as his cell phone began to
ring again. I couldn’t help but giggle. Tony shot me a mock glare of warning
which I responded to by rolling my eyes. He shook his head and flashed a
dazzling smile. The ease at which we teased one another warmed my heart. Still,
Tony would make me walk the line for him, night and day and every second in
between. I welcomed the challenge; it excited the hell out of me.

“Hello,” he answered. A hint of
perturbedness
laced his tone. I caught a glimpse of unease flash across his face before he
smoothed it away.
“Ah, no.
Not tonight. I’ll be
working as a Dungeon Monitor. I’ll check with Shadow Master and see if he can
scene with you, girl.”

I knew right away it was one of Tony’s regulars calling for
a spot on his “hit list.” The jealousy-guilt cocktail sluicing through my veins
felt foreign and acrid. This wasn’t going to be the last call of its kind. But
if Tony’s claims were true, I’d have to find ways to keep my knee jerk
jealousies at bay. It was his duty as a Dom to find replacement sadists to
fulfill his play partners’ needs. And his protective nature ensured that every
one of the subs was matched with a Dom they could trust.

“Yes, I’ll let you know, shortly,” Tony replied before
ending the call. Gazing down at me, he studied my eyes. “You know I feel
obligated to help them, right?”

“Of course I do. It doesn’t mean I have to like it, though.”
I smirked.

He chuckled. “No, and I know you don’t. But as long as you
talk to me about all those insecurities running around inside your pretty
little head, we’ll be just fine.”

I sobered and threaded my fingers in his. “I know you have a
duty. You’ve helped a lot of subs achieve their submission, and even though
they never wore your collar, they’re going to still feel abandoned.”

“Yes. I’ve taken care of some of them for a lot of years.
They rely on me, just like you relied on Matt to take care of you.”

The mention of his name made my blood turn to ice. “Tony,
you can’t compare your situation to mine with that sociopath.”

“That’s not what I’m getting at. We haven’t talked about
your feelings regarding Matt’s death.”

“And I really have no desire to start now.”

“You need to, in order to find closure with that part of
your life.”

“It’s in the past. He’s dead. I’m still here, thankfully, so
time to move on.”

“You ran from him because you convinced yourself that he was
a monster…a dragon you couldn’t slay. I understand you feeling a great sense of
relief now that he’s dead, but the picture you have painted of him in your mind
isn’t the whole man. If you’d known about his ruthless side from the beginning,
would you have let him take care of you?”

“No, I wouldn’t have had a single thing to do with him.”

“Even though he failed, I think Matt tried to shield you
from his dark side. He cared a great deal about you,
Leagh
.
Just like George did by naming you in his will. Why else would Matt take in a
pregnant teen, pay your medical bills, feed, clothe, and house you? Just
because he was a bad man didn’t mean he was a bad man fully.”

“Why are you sticking up for him?” I asked indignantly.

“I’m not, angel. I’m simply giving you a sword to slay him
with. Bring him down to your level and conquer the hurt he caused to your
psyche. Purge the damage he did to you, come to terms with it, and
really
put it in the past. Don’t just gloss it
over. I want you to heal and find closure, sweetheart. I just know that it’s
sometimes harder to do with a ghost.”

Everything Tony said made sense. I’d spent years molding
Matt into a devil. I’d never let the consideration for all he’d provided me
into my condemnation.

“Seeking closure with him while he was alive meant I’d have
to face him again.”

“Yes, and you were afraid of him. But now that he’s gone, I
want to help you work through the trauma and put those fears to rest. Will you
let me?”

“Yes,” I whispered. “But honestly, Tony, all I feel in
regard to Matt is relief. A huge sense of relief and it feels good.”

He smiled and brushed his palm over my cheek. “I know it
does, sweetheart. You have no idea how happy it makes me seeing the worry
vanished from your eyes.”

Staring at his erotic mouth, I licked my lips. “Will you
please kiss me?” I whispered.

“Now you’re getting the hang of it,” Tony murmured. Bending
low, he claimed me with a fervent kiss suffused with so much love I wanted to
pull him into my arms and never let go. With a low growl, and much hesitation,
he eased back. “I’m going to grab a shower. When I’m done I’ll help you get
dressed, and we can head out to the dungeon.”

“Yes, Sir.”
I smiled.

“Christ,
Leagh
,” he growled as he
rose from the bed. “You make my dick throb when you flip on your submissive
switch.”

I laughed and tossed a pillow at him. “So all it takes is to
say ‘yes Sir’ and you’re ready to go?”

“Pretty much, you little minx.”
Tony smirked.

“I’ll remember that.”

“Just as long as you don’t top from the bottom…I sure as
hell hope so!” he exclaimed with a crooked grin as he swaggered into the
bathroom.

#

Dressed and seated at the bar, I couldn’t keep from staring
at Tony in his tight black security T-shirt or the ripple of his bulging biceps
as he ambled from station to station. Smiling as he chatted with members while
keeping a close eye on the subs at play, he took his duties seriously, and I
respected him for that.

“We might need more of these, Mistress Sammie,” Trevor
taunted, dabbing my chin with a bar napkin. “Dahlia can’t seem to stop
drooling.”

“Here, this should help.” Sammie winked, slapping a stack of
napkins onto the glossy polished bar.

“Very funny, Trevor,” I chided. “I notice
you
squirm every time a certain Daddy Dom steps
into the room.”

“Yeah,” he replied dreamily. “Even after all these years.”

“And speaking of said Daddy Dom, here he comes,” Savannah
announced as she playfully poked Trevor in the ribs with her elbow.

As Drake approached, he arched his brows when he saw me
sitting next to Trevor. A broad smile replaced his standard serious expression.

“Good to see you out and about girl,” he murmured, leaning
in to give me a hug before turning his attention to Trevor. “March your sexy ass
to the cross in the corner, and get those clothes off, boy.”

Trevor squealed with glee. His eyes lit up, and a wide grin
slashed across his lips. Jumping off the bar stool, he scurried toward the St.
Andrew’s cross in the corner. Drake’s eyes danced with pride as he watched the
young man.

“You two have a good evening.” The big Dom nodded to
Savannah and me before following his sub to the station.

Trevor was naked and against the cross by the time Drake
made his way to the corner. I watched as he sank a meaty paw into Trevor’s hair
and yanked the young man’s head back. Their lips met in a soulful kiss,
testament to the commitment they shared with one another. A tiny knowing ripple
skittered up my spine, and I turned my head to find Tony staring at me from across
the room. A deliberate smile tugged his lips, and the strength and warmth of
his love filled me.

“Please, tell me I wasn’t as bad as you two when I first
came here,” Savannah giggled.

“You were worse. It was a constant double whammy when you
looked at Dylan and Nick,” I laughed.

“Yeah, I was afraid of that,” Savannah sighed as she darted
a nervous look toward the archway that lead to the private rooms.

“How much time do you figure you’ve got until they come haul
you away, sis?” I asked with a big grin.

“I don’t know. I’m just worried about what they plan on
doing to me. They’ve been
setting up
,”
she used her fingers as quotation marks, “for the past thirty minutes.”

“You’re worried that what? Maybe you’ll enjoy it too much?”
I teased.

“They make sure I always do…eventually.” Savannah beamed.
“I’m just never sure what those two will think up next for me.”

“And that’s such a bad thing?” I teased.

“Not in this lifetime.” She grinned.

“Can I ask you a personal question?” I murmured low.

“You can ask me anything, sis.”

Leaning in close, I lowered my voice even more. “Do you take
them both at the same time, you know, in the pussy and ass?”

Savannah issued a modest smile. “Yes.”

“Did it hurt the first time… up the butt?” I whispered.

“No.” She shook her head and leaned in close to my ear.
“They spent days working with me down there, preparing me for the anal
invasion.”

We both started to giggle. Then I threw back my head and
laughed.

“Oh my god, that’s hilarious,” I snorted, wiping the tears
leaking from my eyes.

When Savannah finally regained her composure, she leaned in
again and explained how Dylan and Nick had made her wear various sized butt
plugs until she could accommodate their cocks.

“And it didn’t hurt?” I whispered.

“There was no pain, just unimaginable pressure that I can’t
describe. It’s euphoric,
Leagh
,” she relayed in a
soft voice. “I take it Tony is interested in…”

“Yes,” I hissed, “And I’m terrified.”

“Oh, don’t be. That man would walk through busted glass for
you. He’d never do anything to hurt you.” Leaning in close to my ear, I felt
Savannah suck in a deep breath. “Tony’s not going to just shove his dick up
there. He’ll spend all the time it takes to get your ready. And when the time
comes, concentrate on relaxing and breathe. If you tense up it
will
hurt. Let him guide you through it. Trust
me, after the first time, you’ll be begging for it.”

I wrapped my arm around her and gave her a hug. “Thank you.
You’ve eased my mind.”

 
“I’m glad. Oh hell,
it’s show time,” she whispered as Dylan and Nick stepped through the archway,
their eyes locked on their prize…Savannah.

“Have fun,” I chuckled.

“Always,” she purred.

I smiled as Savannah slid off the bar stool and rushed to
the open arms of her Masters. The information she’d imparted rolled around in my
head. Understanding what was entailed before the actual act made the thought of
anal sex less intimidating.

“How much longer are you going to have to haul those casts
around Dahlia?” Mistress Sammie asked, placing a fresh soda on the bar for me.

“I’m praying the doctor will take them off tomorrow,” I said
crossing my fingers.

“I hope so too, honey.” She smiled and stepped away to take
another drink order.

“Good evening, Dahlia.” Master Stephen smiled before
claiming the bar stool Savannah had vacated. “You look stunning tonight.”

I felt the heat rise on my cheeks. “Thank you, Sir. And may
I say you look as dashing as ever.”

A huge grin spread over his mouth, and his sea foam green
eyes sparkled. “You can, but we’d both know you were full of shit.”

“Ah,” I choked, my mouth falling open wide. “I beg to
differ.”

“I imagine you beg quite prettily, pet. Tony is a very lucky
man.” He winked.

“If you’re trying to embarrass me to death, Sir, you’re
doing a fine job.”

His laugh was deep and rich and perfectly suited such an
urbane man.

“I’m sorry to hear you
uncollared
Carnation, Sir.”

The smile faded from his lips as a thoughtful expression
lined his face. “Thank you, little one, but it was best for both of us.”

I issued a slight nod and took a sip of my soda, unsure of
what to say next.

“I’ll find a girl that shares the same understanding of the
lifestyle that I do, someday,” Master Stephen assured. “But until that miracle
happens, I’m quite content spending time here with my kinky family.”

“And we’re honored you’re sharing it with us, Sir.” I
smiled, raising my plastic cup to toast the drink Sammie had set in front of
him.

Stephen tapped the rim of his cup to mine. “Thank you for
your endearing words, little one.” He bent close and brushed his lips across my
cheek, flashed me a devilish smile, and walked away.

Something about Stephen seemed more fluid. Relaxed… happy
even. His demeanor was no longer edgy or stressed out. If letting Carnation go
had led to the abrupt change in him, he’d have done well to dump that nasty cat
months ago.

Taking another long look at Tony, I began to grow anxious
for the club to close. I longed to feel his rugged arms around me and breathe
in that sensual scent I’d grown accustomed to. Just as my mind began to fill
with visions of me beneath him, I blinked and jerked my head up as Carnation
situated herself in front of me. Her eyes blazed in fury, and her face pinched
in an angry scowl.

“Are you happy now? You’ve got exactly what you wanted all
along, didn’t you?” Carnation spat with contempt.