Authors: Nicola Claire
“
T
here’s so
much to tell you and no good place to start,” my father’s voice said from the Shiloh unit. Not Calvin. Not the Shiloh itself. But a recorded message left only a day or so ago. “For now, baby girl, just know I’m sorry. So very sorry to have left you.”
I did cry then. Curled on the floor listening to a voice I’d thought I’d never hear again, and then so recently allowed back in my life in a mock parody of my past.
A sob escaped, my chest aching. My throat closing in on itself. Just as I could feel my mind doing the same.
This wasn’t real. This wasn’t happening. How could
this
be real?
“Things were chaotic at Ohrikee,” the voice of my father said. “The Chief Overseer was hurt. Cardinals were battling rebels. Mason Waters had us cornered in a room. And one thing led to another, and I was shot. I woke up some time later somewhere else.
“I’ve been trying to get back ever since.”
I lay stunned on the cold tiles of the kitchen, my cheeks damp from tears. My heart broken. But my mind rebelled still. This wasn’t possible.
Was it?
“Ten years and you’ve grown so much.” His voice sounded rough, but it could have been the recording. “And then sat-loc went down. And there you were. Beautiful and resplendent. Innocent and naive. A nation ripe for the picking. I knew,” he said with effort. “I
knew
others would come. Unless I got there first.”
He was here.
I sat up and ran a hand over my face and eyes, clearing my vision. I glanced around the kitchen and into the lounge, as if I’d see my long lost father there. But nothing had changed. Just our apartment. A half read book. An empty mug. One of Trent’s socks under the couch which was only now visible from this angle.
My gaze came back reluctantly to the Shiloh unit.
“I made it as far as Mahiah.” I frowned. Mahiah made up one of the four nationalities of our society. Anglisc. D’maru. Wáikěinese. And Mahiah. It was also the language the Mahiah spoke. I was fluent in it. As was my father. He wouldn’t have used that word unless he meant to.
But where Mahiah was, this place he had reached, I did not know.
None of this made any sense.
“But getting any closer, for me,” he added, “was a risk my people weren’t prepared to take. So I sent them in. And I also sent you something else to help out until I could get there.”
I was more confused than ever.
“And now sat-loc will be reactivated, if it hasn’t already been done so. I know Lee Tan, and know how he’d respond to any threat.”
Oh my God. My father
did
know Tan. And had known his sister, my dear friend, Aiko.
I started rocking slightly, my arms around my stomach, holding everything in.
“But you
are
under threat, baby girl.” His words reached me down a long, dark tunnel. “These people mean business. I’ve tried to steer them away from Wánměi, but the damage was already done by Chew-wen. They’ve had a taste and now they want more. And with Shiloh gone, their hunger is ravenous.”
I shook my head and pulled myself up from the floor. This needed to be faced head on. It
was
happening.
“My instructions to my team were to observe, but from their last communication it appears things have escalated. Which means it won’t be long before we have to go to phase two.
“I don’t want you to worry, Lena. This time I got it right. I’ve learned a lot in the past ten years, and paid a steep price for it. I will not be making the same mistakes again.”
I sank back against the kitchen bench and just breathed. It was a struggle.
“You can trust my people, and if phase two has been instigated by the time you hear this, then they will make contact with you shortly afterwards. They know what to do, Lena. Together you might just have a chance. But the other wiped?” He paused, the silence stretching, only a small hiss over the speakers let me know the message was still running. “It might be too late for them.”
My mind stalled. The frozen image of Augustine Tengku on Simon’s vid-screen flashed before my eyes.
Swiftly followed by the mask he’d been wearing.
And then the Mahiah woman from the bar, and the Pherres.
I felt my legs go weak again and stumbled to a chair.
“We’ll be together again soon, baby girl,“ my father’s message said. “Be strong. I’m so very proud of you.”
Then the green light went out on Calvin’s vid-screen.
“End of message,” he needlessly announced.
“Did you know?” I whispered.
“Know what, Lena?” Calvin asked in reply.
“That the message was from my father.”
He didn’t answer straight away, and then a series of code appeared on his vid-screen, scrolling letters and numbers in a vibrant white. At the very end was my father’s name.
Calvin Richard Carstairs.
“I am Calvin,” the Shiloh announced.
“I don’t understand,” I said, my voice still a whisper.
“Yes, Lena,” he said. “I knew.”
I stared at the vid-screen, searching for something that clearly wasn’t there.
“Then why didn’t you tell me?” I finally asked.
“You didn’t ask.”
“If you’re him…”
“I am Calvin.”
“But not him,” I concluded.
And I also sent you something else to help out until I could get there.
He’d sent me Calvin. As close to himself as my father could get.
“Shiloh no longer exists,” I said, my voice as rough as sandpaper.
“No, Lena. Shiloh no longer exists,” Calvin agreed. “I am Calvin. I am better. I am not a mistake.”
“How did he do it?” I demanded.
“Do what, Lena?”
“Send you to me.” The Shiloh unit I’d had was not the same as everyone else’s. It was protected by a programme my father had written, in the event that Shiloh became self-aware and took over. My father had seen the writing on the wall, but not lived - not
stayed
- long enough to combat it. So he’d created my Shiloh unit. Separate and contained. It alone held the programme required to deactivate Shiloh.
It had not been Calvin then.
“You activated your Shiloh,” Calvin said. “Sat-loc was down. I slipped in.”
We’d activated my Shiloh when we couldn’t gain access to various Wánměi utilities post freeing our city-state. Rap-Trans, the traffic lights, the power grids. They were all in chaos. We needed to get them back.
We had. With the aid of Calvin.
My father had simply waited until sat-loc was finally down and my Shiloh unit was online, and sent Calvin in.
The desire to deactivate him now was
so
strong.
I don’t want you to worry, Lena. This time I got it right. I’ve learned a lot in the past ten years, and paid a steep price for it. I will not be making the same mistakes again.
Shiloh had been a mistake.
I am Calvin. I am better. I am not a mistake.
“You better not be, buddy,” I said aloud. He didn’t deign to reply.
My head ached. My chest hurt. My cheeks and eyes felt puffy.
“So what’s the plan?” I asked.
“The Masked will contact you shortly,” Calvin said, confirming my suspicions. My father’s people were the Masked who were once upon a time Wiped.
“And the drones?”
“Blue eyes and red eyes,” Calvin said cryptically.
I let a loud breath of air out on a
woosh
.
“The blue eyes are my father’s new drones, aren’t they?”
“It would appear so.”
“You don’t know for sure?”
“My programme was written some time ago,” Calvin admitted. “Without access to the Global Net I have not received an update for several weeks.”
“You were on the Global Net just yesterday,” I pointed out.
“Your father was not.”
I raised an eyebrow at the machine. Clearly there were limitations to my father’s expertise.
I rubbed my face again, trying to stimulate thought.
“OK,” I said. “Then whose are the red-eyed drones?”
“I do not know the answer to that,” Calvin replied. “We need access to the Global Net.”
And if we did that, the red-eyed drone owners would have access to us.
But didn’t they already? They were already here.
And as Calvin hadn’t identified the fighter jets, I could only assume I’d receive the same answer now to that question. So I didn’t ask. We needed access to the Global Net.
I had to talk to Tan.
I pushed off from the chair and then stopped. Staring at nothing. Standing in the middle of the kitchen.
“If the Masked don’t have Trent…” I started.
“Then the threat your father speaks of does,” Calvin concluded helpfully.
That ache in my heart grew heavier.
These people mean business.
Oh God.
I’ve tried to steer them away from Wánměi, but the damage was already done by Chew-wen.
Oh GOD.
They’ve had a taste and now they want more.
And with Shiloh gone, their hunger is ravenous.
I knew what they wanted.
And they knew who Trent was.
But he didn’t have Shiloh. No one did.
Shiloh was gone.
So what had they done to Trent?
I was running before I had time to think of what.
I
struggled to breathe
. I was drowning in my own blood. My mouth full, thick and viscous fluid pouring down my throat, my chest screaming for a fresh gulp of air. A wracking cough surged up from my stomach, making my ribs ache and my body shake and mercifully a small amount of precious air reach my lungs.
I sucked in another immediately and choked on my own blood.
My mind raced for a way out of this. My heart pounded with a fresh wash of adrenaline. Desperation clawed at my psyche. I fisted my hands, feeling the sharp bite of chains at my wrists, and tried to suck in another lungful of air.
Blood splattered onto the floor as I coughed on the exhale. I could feel it dribbling down my chin, down my arms, around my ankles. I’d long ago realised I was chained to a wall. The back of my head felt wet and swollen. My hair matted to my scalp. My vision blurry.
I was dying.
Lena’s face swam before my eyes. So beautiful. So serene. So fierce. She was a dichotomy, was Lena. An Elite with the heart of a Citizen. She’d be looking for me. She’d be hounding Tan and pushing Alan and bugging the fuck out of Si. She wouldn’t stop until she found me.
But I knew what she’d find was only a shell.
If they didn’t burn my body before she got here.
He’d been lying, of course. He didn’t have her. If he’d had her, he would have paraded her before my eyes. Would have relished doing to her what they had done to me for far too long now.
And if they
did
have her, my traitorous mind supplied, they would have stopped asking the same fucking question of me hours ago.
“This can end,” that distorted voice announced. As if it could read my mind. “Just tell us where it is, and we’ll stop. We’ll make the pain go away. We’ll end it. Easy.”
I was weak. I was tired. I was dying.
For the first time since I’d woken up here, I told them the truth.
“Shiloh is gone.”
Silence.
Only my guilt and defeat and shame as company.
They’d won. I’d lost. In the end I was nothing like my father.
I started laughing. A sickly, gurgling sound from the pit of my stomach.
“What is funny?” the voice asked.
“My father,” I said through fits of hysterical cackles.
“What about your father?” I couldn’t answer. I was laughing too fucking hard. “What’s he got to do with Shiloh?”
“Nothing,” I said, relishing disappointing the owner of that creepy, monotone-sounding voice. “He’s got absolutely… fucking…
nothing
to do with Shiloh.”
Silence.
“You wanna know what else is funny?” I asked, warming to this whole new sensation of having triumphed. “You came all this way for
nothing
.”
Silence.
“And now you’re here. And Shiloh’s gone. And I’m dying. And fuck! She’s gonna be so pissed.”
Silence. I think he’d gone. I was talking to an empty room.
I chuckled.
“So fucking pissed.”
Come and get me, baby. I’ll hold on. Just one more look at your face. One more touch of your hands. One more soft kiss from your lips. I’m waiting.
“That’s where you’re wrong, Mr Masters,” the voice suddenly said.
My heart plummeted.
“Shiloh still exists,” he purred in my ear. I could feel his hot breath against the side of my neck, more real than the torture had ever been. “Drones walk your city’s streets. Ours and hers. A war has started, and all you’ve managed to do is convince us that you don’t want to share. Too late,” he said with a burst of laughter.
Real.
This
was real.
“If you can’t tell us where Shiloh is, then we’ll tear your city apart trying to find her.”
I turned my head abruptly and whacked the side of my skull into flesh.
The guy grunted and backed off a step. But he wasn’t finished. He was enjoying himself too much to let me win.
Even a small victory such as that.
“We had an agreement. Your country and ours.”
The chains at my feet suddenly unravelled.
“You gave us a taste and now we want more.”
My arms came down, the return of circulation excruciating. I felt my legs give out and the cold hard floor meet my cheek.
“But a contract is a contract,” the guy said, his voice coming from above. “And if we can’t have more drones, then we’ll take Shiloh.”
I shook my head, the room spinning, the walls fading in and out and out and in. My stomach roiled and instead of blood, I was suddenly vomiting chilli crab and Haldor’s XXX. It burned. But it wasn’t blood.
What the fuck?
“And if you won’t crack, then maybe she will.”
Oh no, not this again.
“Good luck with that,” I said between bouts of heaving.
He laughed, and then gripped me around the upper arm and hauled me upright. A hard slap cracked through the room, my head whipping to the side, my cheek burning.
“Awake yet?” the voice asked.
Colours burst to life all around me. Bright yellows and harsh reds. Wicked blues and dazzling oranges. A purple so vibrant it stung the eyes. I blinked. And then blinked again. And on the third shuttering of my eyelids, the room coalesced more vividly, and so did the man before me.
I didn’t recognise him. He looked Anglisc, but his features seemed a little different. His clothes looked strange as well. Shiny and tight. Like Lena’s wing-suit, but more crazy. A holographic emblem of some sort stretched across a broad chest. The letters U-POL blazoned beneath it.
U-Pol. Like sPol and iPol? This guy was someone’s police.
I head butted him. He wasn’t one of mine.
A litany of words spewed out of his mouth in a language I didn’t understand. And then a laser gun whirred to life. I spun ‘round to face it, reaching for the first thing I could grasp to use as protection. And then looked up into the red eyes of a fucking drone. The world halted on its axis for a brief second. And then I glanced down at what I was gripping.
Bed sheets. Damp with sweat, but otherwise unmarked.
My eyes flicked around the room, and for the first time took in everything.
A bed. Not a rack.
Sheets. Not chains.
And not a fucking cog in sight.
I let out an amused chuckle, running my eyes down my body just to be sure. Boxers and t-shirt. Ribs all intact.
“Some things,” the guy who’d been my constant companion announced, “are not as they seem.”
No shit. I hadn’t been fucking tortured?
My eyes flicked across the floor to the regurgitated chilli crab. The last meal I’d managed to eat before the Tower. How many days ago?
My gaze came back to the drone. The laser gun still held tightly in its metallic hands. And then I turned my attention to the man in the corner.
What was real? I could no longer tell. The room? The man? The drone?
Me?
“It can all go back to how it was, Mr Masters,” the guy said. “We can make you believe anything.”
The threat was there. Not in the words or the tone or the way he held my gaze with an empty one of his own. It was there in the unsaid. In the obvious.
Lena.
But it wasn’t real.
I struggled to sort the chaotic thoughts in my head into order. Real versus hallucinated. I could still feel phantom pains. But if I could keep them separate, I could fight. I could give Lena time to get here. Time to get to me.
I held that bottomless gaze, the whine of the laser gun filling the small room. The bed beckoned. The imagined sound of chains rattled. A shiver rolled down my spine.
Lena must
never
get here. I wouldn’t let her suffer like I had.
“You want Shiloh?” I said to the u-Pol officer.
He smiled. “Tell us where it is.”
I shook my head. “I’ll show you.”
“No.”
I moved across to the bed and lay down, closing my eyes. Hardest fucking thing I’d ever done.
“Then let’s get on with this,” I announced. “I’m feeling a little too healthy as it is.”
Silence.
Then the cold metallic feeling of a drone’s hand gripped my upper arm and hauled me to my feet.
“One step out of line,” the u-Pol officer said, “and you’ll wish we
had
used a hal-gen.”
I nodded my head. It didn’t matter. Either way I was prepared to die to keep Lena safe.
We walked out of the room, images of the Elite I’d come to love flashing through my mind.
My heart ached, knowing they’d probably be the closest I’d ever get to seeing her again.
I’d been kidding myself. Closing my eyes in front of these arseholes was not the hardest thing I’d ever done.
Saying good bye to Lena in my head was.