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Authors: The Sweetest Sin

Mary Reed McCall (18 page)

BOOK: Mary Reed McCall
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He looked as if he was swallowing something bitter, but when she stepped closer to him, he muttered a curse. “All right, lass! I swear that I won’t harm him—for now, anyway.”

She nodded. “Good. Leave the MacRae to me and go now to warn the others. Prepare them for his raid in case I fail.”

Gavin shook his head. “Nay. I refuse to leave you alone here until you tell me exactly what you’re planning to do.”

She gazed at him quietly, trying to finalize the nebulous bits of her idea. “I’m planning to escape from Eilean Donan, Gavin—and I’m going to go alone.” Her heart lurched at the thought, but she saw no other option.

“Escape
alone?
How?” He scowled. “It would be difficult enough for me to steal you out of here.”

She tilted her chin and tried to sound brave. “It will not be so hard. The only reason I didn’t leave earlier was because I thought it a risk to your life and the clan if I broke my agreement with Duncan. Now that he’s decided to attack whether I break it or no, I’ll simply climb from this chamber, swim the loch, and go to our allies at Dumfrie in the north. They’ll hide me and the
Ealach
until this is settled peacefully.”

Gavin started to argue, but she leveled her gaze at
him. “Just hear me out. If I escape with you and go to Dulhmeny as you wish, Duncan will most certainly follow me there, and people will die. But if I leave alone, he might give up the plan to raid in favor of searching for me and the amulet.”

“So you think serving as bait for a murdering MacRae is the answer? That’s the whole of your fine plan?”

Aileana winced at his description of Duncan.
Murdering MacRae
. It was what she herself had called him, both to his face and in her own mind during those first few weeks. But something had changed since then. She’d come to see him differently, watching him struggle to rebuild a life for his clan. She’d glimpsed the tenderness that lived along with the rage and the hurt inside of him.

Aye, her feelings for Duncan had changed much in these past weeks. Too much to explain to her brother right now…

Gavin made a choking sound and shoved his hand through his hair, bringing his voice to a whisper only when she motioned for him to be quiet. “What will you do, lass? Let the MacRae hunt all over the Highlands until he finds both you and the
Ealach
? He’ll do far worse than confine you to your chamber then, I’ll warrant!”

“It won’t come to that. Not if you complete the rest of my plan as I tell you to.”

“Sweet Mother Mary,” he muttered, gazing skyward, “give me the strength to hear what’s left of this.”

She favored him with a dark look. “When the time is right, you will find the MacKenzie Chief and ask for a hearing of the clans. He is Chief of Kintail and laird over Duncan. I met him myself, and it is clear that he is sympathetic to our cause. He thinks our debt of honor long paid to the MacRaes, and I think he would support our dispute and petition for peace.”

Gavin looked unconvinced. “I don’t feel right about this, Aileana. What if the MacKenzie will not help us?”

“Then we will be no worse than we are right now. There will be a war between the clans, and we will all suffer for it.” Fear squeezed her heart as she took Gavin’s hand. “At least if we try what I suggest, there is a chance to avoid bloodshed. Please, Gavin, try it my way first. It cannot hurt.”

Gavin stood silent for a moment. Finally he shook his head and sighed. “Ah, lass, you wear me down, and in that you’re more like our mother than I ever realized.” Love shone warm in his eyes. “She would be proud of your courage, Aileana. As am I.” He cupped her chin and smiled. “When did you turn into such a fine woman? It seems only yesterday that you stood no higher than my knees and lisped up at me through the spaces in your teeth.”

She smiled back at him and kissed his cheek. “Ach, be off with you, now. Our time is running out. But it will all work out in the end, Gavin, I promise. Go and make haste.”

Nodding, Gavin climbed half out the window, then twisted to face her again. “I am conceding to try it your way for now, lass, though I do not like it. But understand that if anything goes wrong, or if the MacRae harms one curl upon your bonny head, I will kill him with my bare hands. This I vow.”

Aileana nodded, mutely, and he blew her a kiss. Holding her breath, she watched him disappear through the window, climbing up his rope to the battlements again. The twine skittered up after him, retrieved from above. She knew that he’d leave nothing that might be seen and lead anyone to suspect he’d been there.

But once he was gone, cold emptiness settled over her.
It was done, then. She’d have to be leaving Eilean Donan and Duncan. Soon.

And forever.

As grim purpose faded and reality struck her, she stumbled back from the window. Tears clouded her eyes. The thought of leaving hurt her, more deeply than she’d thought was possible. Duncan bullied her and tried to control her. He’d locked her in this room and blackmailed her.

And cared for you night and day through your sickness, kissing you with whispered words of tenderness…

Nay! She covered her face with her hands, determined not to soften, not to think of those moments again. She should be glad to get away from Duncan MacRae’s passions and his temper. She should be glad for the freedom she’d gain once she left.

But she wasn’t.

All she knew was that from this day forward, the pain inside of her was never going to stop. Never, so long as she was forced to be parted from this man who was both her sweetness and her curse…the man who held her heart in the tender cruelty of his hands.

 

Duncan peered from behind the wall slit, eyes narrowed, watching Gavin MacDonell emerge dripping and shaking from the loch to vanish into the shadow of the trees. The other MacDonells were in the act of leaving as well; Robert’s mount had just cleared the gate, and his men were thundering after him.

Duncan fingered his claymore, unsheathing it and running his thumb along the edge. Had Robert’s visit been a
ruse, then—a distraction, conceived to divert his attention while Gavin spirited Aileana away?

It was possible, except that Gavin had crossed the loch and left alone. Besides that, something told Duncan that Robert knew nothing of the secret visit. He’d been enraged, actually, when Duncan had denied him the chance to see his sister. If he’d known of Gavin, he’d have avoided the request, fearing to let anyone catch his brother in Aileana’s chamber.

Nay, surely Gavin had worked alone this time. He’d gone to Aileana to pollute her, to pull her into his deceitful snare.

What had been said? What evil plot laid out for his demise and the ruin of the MacRaes?

Anger roiled in Duncan’s breast, partly against Gavin, and partly against himself for being so gullible again. It mingled with pain as he remembered the last time he’d allowed Gavin MacDonell to creep past the defenses of Eilean Donan. Mairi had died that day.

Now Gavin meant to sway Aileana to more mischief. Fiery, headstrong Aileana, who had somehow worked her way into his soul and made him care for her, even though he knew that he could never have her. Gavin had likely given her advice on how to betray him.

Arrows of heat shot behind Duncan’s eyes. Thirteen years ago the MacDonells had knocked him senseless in order to accomplish their evil against him. This time, he had his wits about him, and whether she wanted him to or no, he was going to protect Aileana against herself and the insidious pull of her brother’s schemes.

Sending his claymore hissing back into its sheath, Duncan turned toward the stairs, taking them two at a time. He stalked toward the chamber that housed his
fiery-haired, impetuous bird…the sweet MacDonell nightingale who was about to sing out all of the secrets of her heart to him.

Every one of them. And now.

D
uncan slammed open the door to his bedchamber and stopped still. Cold gushed through the room, and one of the windows gaped open, making the tapestries flap and flutter against the wall.

Something was amiss. Aileana had vanished, as surely as if she’d melted into the misty air. He took a step forward, his gaze slipping around the chamber, noting each piece of furniture, every square of blanket and covering. Nothing was out of place. There’d been no struggle.

Damn her. She must have escaped right after her bastard of a—

A flash of color at the window caught Duncan’s eye. Fiery. A waving mass of light auburn, shining with glints of gold. The figure moved into view of the casement, standing on the wrong side of the wall…perched on the ledge. Poised. Waiting.

Waiting? For…what the devil?

Duncan’s mind seemed to slow to a maddening pace.
Each moment lingered an eternity. He saw Aileana twist to look at him. Her cheeks were streaked with tears, her expression grief-stricken.

He bolted forward, lunging for her as he realized her intent. It was like that day at the cliffs all over again. She was going to go over the edge, and he had to stop her. Catch her before she fell to the grinding stones of the loch below. But as he thrust his hand through the open casement to grip her, she tipped forward, throwing herself away from him. His gloved fingertips barely brushed the fabric of her skirts as she slipped from his grasp.

“Aileana! Nay!” The words ripped from his throat. Shock filled his chest and pressed the breath from his lungs. Frantic, he threw himself against the casement, reaching over as far as he could, only to see her fall away from him, down, down, down. To the cold, gray waters and rocks below…

Before coming to a jerking halt that forced an unladylike grunt from her lips.

A faint trickle of curses drifted up to his ears, and relief flooded Duncan with a stabbing sensation. His heart pounded heavy and hard. Painful. But with the rush of feeling came strength. And fast behind it, renewed anger.

Taking hold of the knotted cord that held Aileana suspended ten feet above the water, Duncan pulled. He grated his teeth, scowling and concentrating on hoisting her back inside the room. His muscles flexed and contracted, and he forced himself to focus on the satisfying ache that radiated through his arms and back.

When she clambered into the chamber again, she looked meek and bedraggled; her hair and clothing were disheveled, the cord hung limp around her waist, and she held her arm around herself there as if her ribs pained
her. It would be no surprise if they did, he thought, waiting for her to speak. But her gaze was fixed to the floor, and with each passing second, the silence weighed heavier between them.

“Damn it, Aileana,” Duncan murmured at last. “Why did you let him get to you?”

She looked up at him in surprise, her eyes shadowed and her lashes clumped with tears.

“Aye,” he said softly, “I know very well about Gavin’s visit.”

“How?” she breathed.

“I saw him swimming to shore.” Duncan took a step forward, taking her chin in his gloved hand to make her meet his gaze. “I know it has been difficult for you here, but after everything I told you, after everything we—” He broke off and dropped his grip from her, adding in a husky murmur, “By the Rood, Aileana, I never thought that you’d be so quick to do something like this.”

“What did you expect?” she retorted. “It was you who betrayed our agreement.”

He didn’t rise to the bait of her challenge. “Did Gavin devise the plot to sneak into my castle for you, or was the idea yours?”

“Do not turn this on him, Duncan. I was as surprised to see Gavin as you. My attempt to escape had nothing to do with him.”

“Then mayhap it was a reason even more insidious,” he answered, ignoring her protests before stepping back. “Tell me—if the plan for your escape wasn’t just now hatched between the two of you, then what
was
your brother’s foul purpose in coming here?”

Aileana’s face looked ashen. He watched her swallow,
saw the flicker of pain in her beautiful eyes. “We had the same idea separately, that is all. He came, intending to take me back to Dulhmeny with him, but I refused him in favor of my own means of escape.”

Duncan arched his brow in surprise; he was silent for a moment before adding, “I know something of Gavin MacDonell, Aileana. Even had the both of you conceived the same idea of securing your freedom from Eilean Donan, he would insist on doing it his way. He’d have thrown you over his shoulder and carried you away no matter your protests, if such had been his purpose.” Duncan’s face sharpened. “I want to know what else was discussed. What else was plotted or planned that would give him cause to agree to leave you behind. What was it, Aileana?”

“It isn’t important now. I made Gavin agree not to pursue it further.”

“I’ll hear what it was anyway.”

“Fine, then,” Aileana retorted hotly, her expression sharp. “It is nothing you wouldn’t expect of a brother whose sister had been dishonored. Gavin told me that he was planning to kill you.”

Bitter laughter grated from his throat. “How original. A plot against my life.” He smiled grimly. “Not much has changed in thirteen years, it seems. But pray tell, how did your foolhardy jump from the window play into Gavin’s plans for achieving my murder?”

Aileana sounded exasperated. “I’ve already told you; my attempt to escape had no tie to Gavin. I was only trying to leave because I thought it might prevent you from raiding Dulhmeny and spilling innocent blood.” Her eyes glistened with tears, though whether they stemmed from anger or latent regret, he couldn’t discern. “If you wish to know the truth, then you should know that be
fore I let him go home, I made Gavin give me his oath that he wouldn’t harm you.”

“Please, Aileana, wanting to kill me is bad enough. Don’t go so far as to insult my intelligence, too.”

Her hands fisted at her sides. “I’m telling you the truth, Duncan—my escape had nothing to do with Gavin. It had to do with us. With you and me and the threats you made not an hour ago to attack my clan if I didn’t give you the
Ealach
.”

Duncan couldn’t prevent his sardonic expression. “Then your timing is more than unfortunate.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “You’ve wanted me dead for as long as I’ve known you, Aileana, and since poisoning me a few weeks past didn’t work, I think you were plotting with your brother to find a way of completing the deed.”

She shook her head, and he felt a jerk of surprise at the desolation in her eyes. “I never wanted you dead, Duncan. When I dosed you with those herbs, it was only to make you realize—” She choked to a halt. “The reason doesn’t matter now. It is enough to say that they were not the kind of herbs to kill you, even had you taken thrice the amount I gave you.”

He leveled a glare at her. “For the hours I spent suffering their effects, I wholeheartedly wished that they were.”

“Aye, well, I am sorry for that now.” She had the good grace, at least, to look ashamed. “But I never wanted any real harm to come to you.” She turned away and added more quietly, “I only wanted you to stop thinking about
her
.”

“Who?” Confusion made him scowl.

Aileana glared back at him. “Nora MacKenzie. The brazen woman who flaunts her charms in your face every chance she finds.”

“Nora?”
Duncan grimaced as he thought of Nora’s cloying scent and groping hands. “What the devil could that woman have given you to fret about?”

Aileana made a scoffing sound in her throat. “Pretending ignorance doesn’t become you, Duncan MacRae.” She flicked him a glance potent enough to shrivel a tree. “Nora takes every chance that comes to throw herself at you, and you encourage it. You will not trick me into saying more by acting like you know nothing of it.”

Duncan’s body suddenly felt numb. All thinking vanished as his mind latched onto the one possibility in all this he’d not dared to allow, except in his most secret thoughts. Kinnon had suggested something of the sort weeks ago, but he’d refused to believe it. He stared at Aileana again, looking deeper this time, taking in her outraged stance, her tousled, fiery hair, eyes that flashed heat and annoyance…and something else.

The hollow feeling in his gut opened wider.

“Tell me about Nora,” he murmured, finally, not taking his gaze from her. “Tell me what you feel when you see her being friendly with me.”

She paused, then frowned and shook her head. “Nay, I’ll be your sport no longer. You can humiliate me with your clan and disgrace me in my family’s eyes. You can even imprison me here. But you cannot command me to speak of my feelings. I will not demean myself more by giving you another weapon to use against me.”

“I’m not commanding you, Aileana; I’m asking you.” He clenched his gloved fists. God, how he wanted to trust, how he needed to believe. “Tell me. Give me a reason for dosing my food and cutting holes in my clothes. For hiding mice in my boots and moving my furniture so that I didn’t even recognize my own chamber. Christ, just tell me the truth of how you feel about me.”

She breathed in, her eyes widening slightly. All was still for several agonizing seconds. Then, like a beach washed smooth by the ocean, her rigidity crumpled. Her expression softened, and her eyes took on a telling sheen. She shook her head. “I do not think that I can.”

“You must.” Duncan’s voice broke with husky entreaty. “Ah, lass, tell me if what I’m thinking—what I am feeling—is true.
Please
.”

She blinked at him. Her lashes were wet smudges of auburn against her pale skin, and her lips trembled. “It is difficult.” She swallowed. Then, straightening, she took a deep breath and brushed her fingers beneath her eyes. “But I suppose it is pointless to keep it in any longer. I did all of those things because I wanted you to notice me, even if it was only in irritation.”

She pulled her gaze away to look down at her feet, her arms wrapped around her middle, and the expression of agony clear on her face. “In truth, when I saw you and Nora together I was jealous, and that is why I dosed you both with the herbs. I—I couldn’t bear the sight of her draping herself all over you. You can mock me for being a fool if you like, but I’ve said it.”

The joyful shock that shot through Duncan made his knees weaken.
Godamercy
. He took two steps forward, his feet like leaded weights as he slowly raised his hand to touch her cheek. A feeling of awe swept over him, making him speak in a tone more befitting a chapel than a bedchamber. “I didn’t think it possible.”

“Nay?” She still looked miserable, her gaze downcast, shame suffusing her cheeks. As she spoke, her breath wafted soft across the exposed skin of his wrist, and an answering shaft of desire lit in his belly.

“Aileana…” He brought both hands up now, making her look at him, cradling her face with tenderness
that flooded from the deepest, most hidden part of him. Her eyes widened slightly with surprise as he pressed a gentle kiss to her brow, savoring the silky feel of her skin beneath his lips, breathing in the sweet scent of her. “You’ll never know how many times I wished for just this…how many times I longed to hear such words from your lips.”

She looked shocked for a moment, her expression of misery vanished under its force. “Truly?” she whispered.

“Aye, truly. I care about you, Aileana. But I never thought—” he broke off and shook his head, a rueful smile curving his lips.

They stood close. Almost touching. He could feel the heat of her body warming him through his plaid and igniting the embers of his passion, kept forcibly banked for so long, to full blaze. But he sensed that she still reeled from the suddenness of this change between them. She needed a little time to realize the truth. To come to him when she was ready. Hell, he needed some time to adjust to it all. Nevertheless, it took much of his resolve to remain motionless and let her make the next move as she willed it.

He watched the rise and fall of her breast. His gaze traveled from the curve of her chin to the full swell of her lips, his breath catching as they parted in soft exhalation. When his stare moved up, finally, from there to the sweetly rounded, freckle-sprinkled tip of her nose, the graceful sweep of her cheekbones, and up to her eyes, he saw the sweet warmth filling her gaze, and his passion spiraled tenfold.

“I cannot believe it,” she murmured, still looking at him as if he might melt away before her eyes.

“It is true, Aileana. I don’t know how it happened, and I tried to deny it to myself, but the feeling is there.”
He smiled. “As with everything else about you, it is persistent, prodding and poking me even when I do not wish it.”

“Is that so?” She smiled back at him in response. “And what, pray tell, is it that you wish from me now, Duncan?”

He paused for a moment, the image of what he envisioned full and perfect inside of him. But he’d learned a few things where Aileana MacDonell was concerned, and one of the most important was that it was always better to let her take the lead—or at least the satisfaction of seeming to get it from him. Raising his brow, he murmured, “What do you have in mind?”

“Hmmm…I believe I shall have to give that question some thought.”

Her tongue darted out to moisten her lips, and his heart skipped a beat. She looked both innocent and yet somehow confident in her feminine allure, and the contrast of the two aspects was nothing less than intoxicating. Though he had handed her the control over what happened next, he suddenly found that the idea of her initiative in this excited him more than he’d believed possible.

“It is unwise to become
too
confident, lass,” he answered huskily, trying to keep himself from completely abandoning all pretense of restraint, “or you might find that you’ve gotten yourself in—”

His words cut off to a groan as she stepped closer and pressed her body full against him. “—over…” he murmured, while her hands slid up his arms and to his shoulders, “…your head,” he finally whispered against her lips, before she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a soul-searing kiss.

BOOK: Mary Reed McCall
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