Marionette (17 page)

There was no reply from her lover.

“You better not be fucking anyone else, you sonofabitch.” Her voice lost her sweetness. “Because I’ll cut your dick off.”

Still no response.

“You asshole…‌you
are
fucking around.” She staggered back to take a swing, but before she could raise her arm, the drunks had fallen on top of each other. Only half of them realized what had happened. The other half complained about swimming in a pool of beer and undesirable liquids on the floor.

I sighed. Finally, I located an empty tree stump outside and slumped down on it. What would Jess say if she found out about Tom? The girl inside the party took things to a whole level Jess wouldn’t fathom, but still, it wasn’t nice what I was doing. But what could I do? I had to pretend to be straight. I didn’t want to end up like Alex, locked up in a treatment facility. She hadn’t survived that, and we’d been two peas in the same pod. Who was to say I would survive if I got locked up? I knew damn sure my parents wouldn’t care if I didn’t. “Dating” Tom was a must: survival of the fittest and all of that hoopla.

I wanted to cry. If I could just get through college quickly, I would be free of my parents forever. Then I could get a job, move away with Jess, and let my family rot in hell for all I cared. I scanned the backyard and studied the partygoers. What did they have to worry about? Grades? Probably not. Money? Maybe, but most were spoiled brats. Sex? That was about all that mattered here. Not life and death situations. Well, not unless they got AIDS—‌then that would be life and death. But what was the likelihood of that at an isolated school in this town? Besides this college and the one main street, there wasn’t much to the area. That’s why I had chosen it: anonymity. This place was insulated from the real world.

“Paige! How the fuck are you?” Karen fell on top of me, spilling my water.

I brushed the water droplets off.

“Where have you been? We’ve been looking for you for hours.” Minnie stared at me with one eye. Why was her left eye closed? Minnie the pirate.

“I was inside, looking for you three.”

“Why, we’ve been out here the whole time.” Minnie waved her beer.

It was obvious that the three mouseketeers had hit the keg before it tapped out.

“Oh, don’t worry, I’ve been conversing with our school’s elite this evening.” I smiled ruefully.

“Sounds so boring, and speaking of boring, this party is dead. The beer’s gone. Do you know where we can go?” Jenna looked hopeful as she swatted at an imagery gnat.
Obviously, she won’t be able to drive the guys home
, I thought. Where were they? I looked around, but couldn’t see hide nor hair of them. I shrugged. They had a better chance of finding a ride home unmolested.

“Yeah…‌this partay has had it.” Karen threw in her two cents.

“Yeah!” clarified Minnie.

I scratched my chin, mulling over an idea. “Actually, I do know of a place we can go.”

“Great! Letzzzz go!” Karen marched off before I’d even finished getting all the words out.

They filed into a line and headed toward the fence. We always entered a frat party via the front door, but we always left by hopping over the fence, in case the coppers were outside waiting to pounce. I didn’t understand this logic. Wouldn’t the cops be smart enough to wait in the back? But who was I to ruin a tradition? Besides, watching drunk people jump a fence was entertaining. I did my best to shove all three of them over before gracefully swinging over myself. Occasionally, one of them got hurt, but they never knew it until the next morning, and by then I could lie about how they’d sprained their ankle. Another tradition for the sober driver, I’m assuming.

I smooshed all of them into the back seat, since I didn’t trust their drunk asses not to mess with all the shiny buttons in the front.

Before they knew what was going on, I had parked the car, whisked them back to the dorm, and opened the door to my room.

“Hey, wait a minute, this is your room. There’s no party here. I should know; I live next door.” Karen put her hands on her hips.

Minnie waggled her finger in my face. “This is a nasty trick.”

“You’re all so smart. I can’t put anything past you.”

“You mean this is a joke,” asked Karen.

“Nope. I mean goodnight.” I shoved my way past them and fell onto my bed, not bothering to change out of my clothes.

The three stooges jibber-jabbered at the door for a minute and then admitted defeat. Slowly, they dispersed. I heard Karen and Jenna crash through the bathroom on their way to their own room.

I hoped Tom and the boys had made it home safe. While Minnie was in the bathroom, I tried calling Jess. She didn’t answer. Then I dialed Tom’s number. Again, no answer. Where was everyone?

* * *

“Where are you going?” asked a lethargic voice.

“Heading home for the weekend. I’m sorry I woke you.” I patted Minnie’s arm. She was still in bed. Most people were, at four in the morning.

“What time is it?” Minnie tried to sit up, but ended up grabbing her head and falling back down onto the pillow.

“Early. Too early to talk. I’ll see you Sunday night or Monday morning.”

She grunted a goodbye as I slung my backpack over my shoulder.

When I had woken up a few minutes ago and dialed Jess’s number, she still wasn’t home. I had a bad feeling.

The highway was deserted, so I made good time to the apartment. I pulled into the parking lot and spied her car. That was a relief. Now what, though? Should I barge in and wake her up, or should I head to Denny’s and have breakfast and wait? What if I was super quiet and crawled into bed with her? She might like that surprise. Smiling, I let myself into the apartment.

Jess stood in the kitchen, pouring a beer. I looked at my watch. Was I mistaken about the time? Six. I tapped my watch.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” She slapped the glass down on the counter and rushed over to me.

Her hug seemed genuine. Everything was normal, except that it was dawn and she had apparently just returned from her evening exploits.

“Are you just getting home?” I asked.

She reeked of smoke.

“And have you been smoking?”

Jess pushed me away, teasingly. “Are you checking up on me, Paige?” She tapped her foot, waiting for my answer.

“Yes. I tried calling you last night when I got home and then I called this morning when I woke up. I was worried. Where have you been?”

“At work. You wouldn’t believe the mess my boss, Richard, got us into. He signed this client, and Tim, Sally, and I had to work all night to get a presentation together for first thing Monday.”

I thought about that for a minute. “Why couldn’t you work on it over the weekend?” I wasn’t trying to accuse her of anything, I just found her explanation odd.

“Oh, I wish. No, Richard was flying out this morning to New York to meet with the client, so we had to have it done before his flight.” She glanced at her watch. “Which he should be boarding in another hour or so. I had to drive the presentation to the airport. Trust me, Paige, they don’t pay me enough.” She marched back into the kitchen and took a swig of her beer.

I followed meekly. It all sounded believable, but something was gnawing at me.

Jess scrutinized my face. “Are you hungry? I’m famished. Let’s head to Denny’s. My treat.”

I wasn’t going to turn down a hot meal. Denny’s wasn’t a five-star restaurant, but it was heads above dorm food.

“You’re on. I can’t wait to tell you about this party I went to last night.”

She leaned in and gave me a peck on the cheek. “Even if you were checking up on me, I’m glad to see you.”

“I wasn’t spying. I was worried.” I defended.

She patted my arm. “I know. That’s what I love about you.”

* * *

After the zombie of a hostess seated us, I scanned the menu. Just looking at the laminated pictures of French toast, ham, bacon, pancakes, and hash browns made me salivate.

“Do they feed you up there?” Jess peered over her menu. “You look like you’re about to devour your menu.”

“The food is shit there, and my roommates keep invading my emergency stash. I never feel full anymore.” I continued to scrutinize the menu.

Jess pulled out a wad of twenties. “Well, you can eat until you can’t eat any more.”

“What’d you do, rob a 7-Eleven on the way home from the airport?” I gawked at the rolled-up notes.

“Yes.” She looked deadly serious.

I fidgeted in my chair.

“Paige, I’m just kidding.” She whacked me on the head with her menu. “Richard gave me a bonus for working all night.”

I thought she said she didn’t get paid enough by them.

Our waitress approached. “What’ll you want?” she asked rudely, glancing at her watch. I wondered how much longer until her shift was over.

Jess ordered a Tex Mex omelet and I started with their biggest breakfast: eggs, bacon, ham, pancakes, and hash browns. I also asked for a chocolate malt.

“Will that be enough for you? Nice touch with the malt.” Jess winked at me.

“Hey man, I don’t like to waste opportunities.” I gestured to the cash in her purse.

“So tell me about the party. I miss college.” She got a faraway look in her eye. “The working world is no fun.”

“Really? So far, I’m not seeing why people say it’s the best time of your life. All people do is drink and make fools of themselves.”

Jess laughed heartily. “That’s the fun part, Paige. Trust me, when you finish and join the rat race, you’ll miss those days. Gosh, you are such a fuddy-duddy.”

“I am not! I just don’t understand it. Take Karen, she’s determined to bag a boyfriend by the end of the semester. Why?”

“Is she cute?” Jess sipped her water.

“Yeah, I guess.”

Jess threw her straw at me. “You better behave while you’re up there.”

I knew she was only joking, but I decided then that she could never find out about Tom.

“So, if Karen’s cute, why can’t she find a boy?”

The waitress set my chocolate malt in front of me. Before I had a chance to dig in, Jess jabbed her finger into the whipped cream and licked her finger. I almost forgot what I was saying.

“Oh, I think it’s because she farts a lot. And she’s a jock. She and Jenna are on the basketball team. She’s girlie, but also masculine, if you get my meaning.”

Jess nodded. Our food arrived; that was an advantage to getting to Denny’s so early in the morning: you didn’t have to wait long.

I reached for the maple syrup and started to douse my pancakes, bacon, and ham. Jess poured Tabasco on her omelet.

“How can you stomach that much Tabasco?”

“I like to live on the edge.” She shook a few more drops out.

We ate in silence because I was too busy shoveling food in. After several minutes, Jess mentioned that Mel called for me.

“Do you think she wants more money?”

A look of concern marred her lovely face. “Yes. You can count on that.”

I leaned back from the table. “Sometimes I feel as if Mel treats me like I’m her personal ATM. Like I owe her somehow.”

“She’s going through a lot right now…‌and…”

“And, what?”

“Oh, it’s nothing.”

I could tell it was something.

“Come on, Jess. What?” I set my fork down and braced for the news.

“She feels guilty.”

“Guilty? About what, taking my money?”

Jess stirred her food around on her plate, not looking at me. “I’m sure she feels bad about that too, but she feels guilty about…” She motioned to my arm.

“That I tried to kill myself?” I fished.

“Sorta.”

“Jess, you’re killing me. What did she tell you?”

The waitress stopped by to ask how the food was. I didn’t respond, but Jess said everything was wonderful and ordered another coffee.

I lowered my head and asked quietly, “What did Mel say?”

I knew I wasn’t going to like what I heard. Why else would Jess take so long getting it out? That wasn’t like her. Quick, like a Band-Aid, was her usual method.

“She thinks we should tell your parents.”

“What?” I shouted. The only other people in the restaurant turned and stared.

Jess put a finger to her lips to shush me. “I knew I shouldn’t have told you.”

“Why in the hell does she think she should tell them, of all people?” I threw my arms up in the air.

Jess waved her fork in the air. “Oh, you know how close Mel is with her parents. She still lives with them. She thinks if your parents knew about”—‌she motioned to my scars again—‌“they would be nicer to you.”

“What kind of logic is that?”

“Mel logic,” Jess confessed sheepishly.

“She…” my voice quavered.

Jess looked startled. “Oh, no. She hasn’t said anything to them. And she won’t, Paige. I talked to her and she won’t say anything.”

“How can you be so certain?”

Jess reached across the table and rubbed my scar where it emerged a little from my shirt. “Paige, you have to trust me on this. Besides, what can you do about it? It’s not like you can hire some dude named Guido to teach her a lesson.”

I shivered.

“I want to go home.”

Jess reached into her purse and walked up to the register to pay the bill. While she did, I went to the car and sat in the passenger side. Usually, I drove, but I didn’t have the energy. I leaned my head against the cool window. Condensation trickled onto my forehead.

Jess slid into the driver’s seat without any protest. When we got back to the apartment, I took a shower—‌a long, hot shower. My shoulders were tense and I wanted to wash all the filth off me. I hadn’t showered after the party, and all of a sudden I felt like I was drowning in shit.

By the time I was done, my body was parboiled. I didn’t bother getting dressed, just walked out to the front room in a towel. Jess looked deflated.

“Paige, everything is going to be okay. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

I didn’t speak, just sat on the couch, utterly drained. Jess didn’t know the full truth. No one did.

“Listen, I worked all night, and I’m betting you didn’t get much sleep. Let’s go to bed and get some rest.”

I nodded.

As I closed my eyes, I heard thunder off in the distance and then a streak of lightning lit up the room. My mind flashed back to that night. Alex screaming like a madwoman. I didn’t want to become like that. What would I do if the police came to take me away to one of my father’s hidden gems? Actually, he would probably be more subtle and have someone snatch me from the street, like those kids you see on the back of milk cartons. Boom. Done! And no one would be the wiser. Oh, Jess would look for me, but there’s no way in hell my father would leave a trail of any type. Then my mother would get involved. She was the real threat.