Authors: Annie Dalton
I glanced across at this amazing girl and I thought how we would never even have met if it wasn’t for a total miracle. (No, trust me. Mel Beeby winning a cosmic scholarship is a miracle!)
All at once I felt this pang of - I don’t know -
foreboding
. “Lollie, we’re always going to be friends, aren’t we?” I asked anxiously.
She peered at me over her little reading glasses. “What’s wrong, girl? Not having a big bad premonition, are you?”
The human Melanie would have denied everything. But thanks to Lola, I was getting better at sharing my true feelings. “I was just thinking I couldn’t bear it if I had to go back to that phoney person I used to be,” I said painfully.
Lola leaned over and patted my hand. “That’s not going to happen! We’re soul-mates,
carita
. We knew each other back at the Dawn of Creation.” She gave me a mysterious smile. “And I’m pretty the Agency reunited us for a reason!”
I felt a sudden prickle of excitement. “Are you serious?”
Her eyes sparkled. “This is still like the apprenticeship stage. But once we’ve got through our angel warrior training, we’ll be incredibly wise and strong—”
“—but in a cute way,” I suggested, giggling.
“Cute?” Lola sniffed. “We’ll be gorgeous!! We’ll be such an unstoppable cosmic force, the PODS will go whimpering back to the Hell dimensions like ugly little puppy dogs!”
“You really think so?” I said wistfully.
Lola’s brows drew together. “Are you doubting the words of La Sanchez?”
I swallowed. “Suppose we’d met on Earth? As humans I mean? Would we have recognised each other then?”
Lola looked surprised. “Sure we would, Boo!”
“But would we though?” I persisted. “There’s so much pressure on that little planet, Lollie. Even angels can’t hear themselves think.”
“Hey girl, I’d know you anywhere! I’d feel it - in here.” Lola pressed her hand to her heart. “So would you.”
I was so touched I didn’t know what to say.
Next minute, Lola jumped up and turned up the volume on my radio, totally lightening the mood. “I just can’t get enough of this tune!” she sighed. “It is totally,
totally
luminous!”
The radio station was playing a hip-hop remix of True Colors. We started to sing along. Lola literally sings like an angel. I sing more like a squeaky little reptile. But it sounded OK when we sang together. It sounded nice.
But I must have been having a big bad premonition after all. Three weeks after our conversation, my soul-mate and I were torn apart, separated by something so dark, it could only have been invented in one of the Hell dimensions. Like all truly terrible things, though, it happened on Earth.
But it really began with Brice.
S
orry, I’ve got to interrupt the flow. I’m worried you don’t understand about the war. That cosmic war I’m always on about? I’m not sure you realise how big this is.
It’s MASSIVE. Battles between the two major cosmic agencies are going on in every single century in human history. This conflict gets more intense every day. Want to know what we’re fighting over?
YOU.
The PODS, a.k.a. the Powers of Darkness, a.k.a. the Opposition, want total control of your souls. They want you to live your life in a kind of dreary waking dream where nothing matters because nothing feels real. They want you to forget who you are.
You think that couldn’t happen, right?
You think you’d know if someone was interfering with your head?
Look, I don’t have time to get into PODS strategies right now, but trust me, OK? Those guys have been around for AEONS. They know a zillion dirty tricks to play on human minds. Our school library has a ton of books devoted to that one subject alone.
My Agency, on the other hand, doesn’t want to own anybody’s soul, thanks. We think your soul is your personal property. We do have an agenda, but it’s the total opposite. We want you to wake up and remember who you really are, so you can have a fabulously rewarding time on your gorgeous little planet!
Check this - life on Earth was actually meant to be FUN.
Unfortunately, the Dark Powers have lulled millions of human beings into a state of cosmic amnesia. They’ve been doing it since Time began. They’re still doing it today. Now I’m going to let you in on another celestial secret.
You are the reason the Heavenly City never sleeps. Yes - you!
When I look out of the dorm window at night, I can see brilliant star bursts of light over the Agency Tower, FLASH, FLASH, FLASH, about a heartbeat apart. Know what that is? Each star burst is an agent returning from, or departing to, Planet Earth. Plus we have Heaven-based agents beaming uplifting vibes at you morning, noon and night. Joy, Peace, Love, whatever. Those aren’t just words in Christmas carols, you know. They’re powerful energy vibrations. We can actually see them on the Angel Watch computer screens, forming a beautiful web of light around your gorgeous little blue-green planet.
That’s how precious humans are. That’s why the Agency will never give up on you, EVER. Your family and friends might give up on you. You might actually give up on yourself. Hey, your dog might even give up on you! But the Heavenly City stays open for business twenty-four-seven.
Which brings me right back to Brice, one-time cosmic dropout, now humiliatingly doing retakes at the Angel Academy.
I’m not sure there is such a thing as an average angel, but if so Brice is definitely not it. The guy wears ripped T-shirts advertising bizarre celestial rock bands. He is basically a total outlaw.
What is a boy like that doing in Heaven? Good question. I could tell you he’s a bad boy who sold his soul and accidentally found his heart. Or I could say he used to be a fallen angel who got homesick for the Light. However the truth is a little more complicated.
I ran into him on my first field trip to Earth, when he was working for the PODS. Technically we were cosmic enemies. Technically, Brice and I were also total strangers. Yet for reasons I won’t go into, it felt like he knew me a
leetle
too well for comfort. Lola believes our meeting was some big prearranged karmic thing. She says when we met up that day in foggy 1940s’ London, our souls went,
Omigosh, it’s you
!
“Brice made a big mistake,” Lola explained solemnly. “One day he woke up and found himself on the totally wrong side in the cosmic war. He needed to find a way back home, and you were it, girl.”
Maybe, maybe not. But when the heavenly authorities finally agreed to let Brice come back to our school, I was disgusted. I couldn’t believe I had to share Heaven with this devious dirtbag!
To listen to our headmaster, Brice’s dodgy past was all water under the bridge. Michael’s theory was, if you wait long enough, trees evolve into diamonds, and bad boys eventually come good.
At the time I was like, yeah right, and we’re all made of Stardust and what’s that got to do with the price of cheese? But now I’ve started to wonder if there might be something in this evolution stuff after all, because my feelings towards Brice slowly began to change.
It was disturbing at first, looking up in the library to see my cosmic enemy feverishly turning pages at the next table. Plus, for a boy who once hobnobbed with demons, he looked alarmingly vulnerable. I’d seen Brice’s dark and dangerous side, however, so I had no intention of being suckered in. But as the months passed, I started to get used to having him around.
After he came with me and Lollie to Victorian times, I began to feel almost, well, fond of him.
The day after we got back from ancient Egypt, Brice was slumped at the back of the class wearing his shades, and a ripped black T-shirt that said ASTRAL GARBAGE.
He wasn’t the only one feeling hungover that day. We’d all been humungously affected by some toxic ancient Egyptian vibes. Everyone was suffering, including Mr Albright.
Halfway through the lesson, our teacher noticed my new Emily Strange top and went up the wall!
“A garment decorated with a skull and crossbones design is not suitable for school, Melanie,” he said in a shocked voice.
“It’s sweet,” I protested. “It’s a sweet, fun, retro thing.”
“Pirates were
not
sweet, Melanie,” he corrected. “They
certainly
weren’t fun. They were calculating, cold-blooded murderers.”
Lola and I secretly hid our smiles. You see, on our trip to Elizabethan England, Lollie and I had met the sweetest pirate ever. His daughter, Cat Darcy, was in love with Shakespeare. I’m truly not name-dropping, it’s true! Though actually, the world’s most famous writer went under the name of Chance, back then. He was going through a really bad patch and Cat’s pirate dad helped to straighten him out. Listen, I’m not saying piracy is cool. And I’m not saying Cat’s father was a harmless pussycat. I’m just saying that even a pirate can surprise you by having a heart.
Mind you, I was pretty sure Mr Allbright knew this already. And to be fair, our teacher is not normally the type to stress over an innocent fashion statement.
He was stressing because:
1. He’d been zapped by toxic vibes like everyone else, and
2. We were rapidly approaching the end of term and NO ONE in our class had shown any interest in entering the HALO awards.
“I’ve got entry forms here,” he said reproachfully at the end of the lesson. “Think about it at least.”
Lola and I weren’t paying much attention. We had to dash to the library to catch up on an overdue assignment. We’d been scribbling for about ten minutes, when Brice mooched around the stacks.
“Fancy skiving off?” he said in a casual voice.
Lola sighed. “I wish. Unfortunately we have to do this thing.”
Brice cleared his throat. “That’s a shame. I had a proposition. I was wondering if you’d both be interested in a joint entry for the HALO awards.”
Lola looked puzzled. “Who with?”
He went red. “Well, me, obviously.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. “You are kidding!”
Brice scowled. “Is there some reason I shouldn’t enter?”
“Of course not,” said Lola quickly. “The awards are open to every trainee in the school.”
“You’ve got to admit it’s a bit out of character,” I said with a grin.
I genuinely meant it as a joke, but Brice just muttered something uncomplimentary and stormed out.
Lola and I looked at each other.
“That went well,” she said in a small voice.
I felt like a really bad person, but I wasn’t ready to admit it. “That boy has such a major chip,” I complained.
Our buddy Reuben came over. “What’s up?”
Lola started to explain but other library users started ssshing.
“Let’s go to Guru,” Reuben suggested. “You can tell me there.”
“Why not,” Lola said with a sigh. “My concentration’s totally shot.”
Guru is less than five minutes’ walk from our school. We grabbed an outdoor table in the sun and ordered the cafe’s special Aztec hot chocolate, otherwise known as the trainee angel’s cure-all.
Mo, the guy who runs Guru now, must have sensed something was up, because when he brought our order he tactfully left us lots of extra marshmallows.
Lola was too upset to notice. “It’s really hard for Brice to ask people for help,” she said miserably. “And we just laughed in his face.”
“We did NOT laugh in his face,” I objected. “We were just - surprised.”
“You basically told him he was a phoney,” Reuben pointed out.
“It was a
joke
, all right! The guy used to live in the Hell dimensions! I can’t believe he’s that sensitive.”
“Believe it,” said Reuben.
Lola’s eyes were dark with worry. “This is a really tough time for Brice, Melanie. He’s on probation and everyone at our school knows it. He feels like everyone is watching him, waiting for him to screw up again.”
The extra marshmallows were going to waste so I popped two into my hot chocolate and immediately felt ashamed.
When Brice first got a scholarship to the Angel Academy, I’m sure he secretly dreamed of climbing all the way to the top of that dizzy ladder to the stars. Instead, he tripped over a monster snake and went slipping and sliding all the way back to square one. Now he’d got to start that gruelling game of cosmic snakes and ladders all over again. Only this time, like Lola said, everyone was watching…
“Winning a HALO would be like saying he was rehabilitated,” Lola was saying earnestly. “He wouldn’t have to spend his angelic career looking over his shoulder.”
“Lollie, if this was me, you’d tell me to get over it, you know you would.”
She patted my hand. “True! But if you asked us to back you, we’d do it like a shot. We wouldn’t even think about it.”
I felt myself go all emotional. “Really?”
My mates nodded vigorously.
A worry slid into my mind. “You don’t think Brice was like, testing us do you? Like checking to see if we’re really his friends?”
Reuben winced. “Actually—”
“Oh, whaaat!” I wailed. ” Now he’s going to think we’ve been faking. We’ve got to go and find him.”
“Too obvious,” Reuben advised. “He’d hate it if he knew we’d been talking about him. Bring it up casually next time you see him.”