Authors: Samantha Chase
Tags: #Contemporary, #Romance, #Fiction, #Brothers, #Family Life, #Family Saga, #Single, #Oldest, #Designer, #Love, #Construction, #Walls, #Major Storm, #north carolina, #Coast, #Decisions, #Building, #Years, #Proud, #father, #Mother, #death, #Relationships, #Time
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Copyright © 2015 by Samantha Chase
Cover and internal design © 2015 by Sourcebooks, Inc.
Cover design by Dawn Adams/Sourcebooks, Inc.
Cover image © Yuri/istockphoto.com
Sourcebooks and the colophon are registered trademarks of Sourcebooks, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems—except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews—without permission in writing from its publisher, Sourcebooks, Inc.
The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
Published by Sourcebooks Casablanca, an imprint of Sourcebooks, Inc.
P.O. Box 4410, Naperville, Illinois 60567-4410
(630) 961-3900
Fax: (630) 961-2168
This book is dedicated to my husband and all of the love, support, and patience he’s given me.
And none of this would be possible without the amazing team of people I am blessed to have around me. There aren’t enough words to say thank you to my editorial team—Deb, Susie, and Eliza. The three of you truly lift me up and inspire me to be more. You’re the best!
Sixteen years ago
The smell of roses was overwhelming.
Not that the aroma was surprising—there had to be at least fifty oversized arrangements around him, each filled with different colored roses. The funny thing about it was that the flowers were all wrong. Roses had never been his mother’s favorite flower; it was just what she had told people because whenever she’d shared her actual favorite flower, people looked at her as if she were a little off.
Daisies. Daisies were her favorite.
Aidan Shaughnessy stood alone at his mother’s grave site. Everyone had left hours ago and gone back to the house to eat and to do their best to support the family after losing its matriarch. It was more than Aidan could bear to deal with, so he stayed, all day, alone.
The cemetery was less than a mile from home, so he didn’t mind walking back later. Looking down at the freshly laid dirt, he felt both numb and overwhelmed with emotion at the same time. He didn’t want her to be alone.
Stuffing his hands into his trouser pockets to try to ward off the chill as the sun started to set, Aidan wondered how he was supposed to move on. His mother was his rock; she was his biggest cheerleader, his toughest critic, and the only person with whom he felt comfortable sharing all of his hopes and dreams. Thinking back to his early teen years, a conversation came to mind.
“Girls are stupid,” Aidan said, coming in the back door after school and throwing his backpack on the ground. His mother was in the kitchen washing some fruit, watching him expectantly.
“Are you making an apple pie?” he asked hopefully.
She
nodded. “I know it’s your favorite,” she said with a serene smile as she wiped her hands on her cherry-patterned apron. For a few minutes she said nothing. She waited out her fourteen-year-old, eldest child until he was ready to talk.
“I asked Lisa O’Rourke to go to the homecoming dance and she said yes. Then I got to school today and she told me she didn’t want to go with me. Mark King had asked her and since he’s captain of the varsity football team, she’d rather go with him.” Aidan sat down on one of the stools at the counter, looked up at his mother, and willed the tears he felt threatening to stay put.
“Seems to me you should be celebrating.”
He
looked
at
his
mom
as
if
she’d lost her mind. “What? Why would you even say that?”
She
shrugged
and
began
to
peel
the
apples. “A girl like that? One who would make promises to one boy and then go off with another? Well, good riddance, I say. Plus, let her go off with Mark King. We all know he’s the captain of the team only because his uncle is the coach. He’s not very good.”
Now
it
was
Aidan’s turn to shrug. “He’s not so bad.”
Lillian
Shaughnessy
carefully
placed
her
paring
knife
and
the
apple
she
was
working
on
down
on
the
counter
and
leaned
toward
her
son. “You’re going to run circles around him. Mark my words. When you make varsity next year, you are going to make everyone forget Mark King ever existed in that school. And when you graduate high school with a football scholarship and go on to the NFL? Well, you’ll look back on this and laugh and be thankful you didn’t get tangled up with a girl like Lisa.”
The
thought
of
being
in
the
NFL
put
a
smile
on
Aidan’s face, but it was quickly replaced by a more contemplative look. “But how will I know, Mom? I mean, I thought Lisa was cool. I really thought she liked me. How am I going to know the difference between a girl I can trust and one that…you know…I can’t?”
A
wide
smile
crossed
Lillian’s face. “I’ll let you
know.”
Aidan
rolled
his
eyes. “Mom,” he said with a mock whine. “No guy lets his mom pick out his girlfriend.
Sheesh!”
“I’m not saying I’m going to pick her out for you,” she said diplomatically as she went back to peeling the apples. “I’m just saying I’ll be able to help you see if she is the girl for you. If she is someone you want to share your…someday with. If she is worthy of someone as amazing as you, Aidan Shaughnessy.”
The
two
smiled
at
one
another
as
Lillian
finished
assembling
the
pie
and
Aidan
felt
a
surge
of
confidence
in
his
future—all because he had the greatest mom right there at his side.
Standing in the middle of the cemetery, Aidan wondered about that future. That conversation had taken place four years ago. As if she had seen into his future, he had made the varsity team the following year and, even now, was in college on a football scholarship. Football was his life. It was supposed to be his future but it wasn’t right now. Right now, there didn’t seem to be any point in the future.
Why had this happened? Why had his family been destroyed like this? Aidan had no idea how he was supposed to move forward, how any of them were supposed to move forward. This wasn’t supposed to happen to the Shaughnessys! They were supposed to be together—always! Looking up at the heavens, Aidan wanted to curse, but his mother had taught him better than that.
“What am I supposed to do, Mom? What are any of us supposed to do?”
The responsibility of raising the kids had all been on Lillian, and everyone knew she loved it. But Aidan’s father now had six kids to raise on his own. Aidan had no idea how that was going to work, because while his dad was an amazing man, he was the breadwinner, who worked hard and sometimes long hours.
Aidan thought of each of his siblings—Hugh, Quinn, Riley, Owen, and…Darcy. He felt his heart squeeze in his chest. Darcy was just a baby. She was never going to know her mother. And his mother was never going to get to see her baby girl grow up. Lillian Shaughnessy had wanted a daughter in the worst way after having five boys, and even though there were ten years between Darcy and the youngest boys, twins Riley and Owen, everyone had been thrilled by her pregnancy. A small smile crossed his face even as tears began to fall.
It wasn’t fair. None of it.
Once more, Aidan looked to the heavens. “I need you, Mom. We all need you.” A small breeze blew, yet Aidan didn’t feel it. “I still have so many questions. You promised to help me with the answers.”
Turning, he pulled a rose from one of the many arrangements. Looking at it for a moment, he kissed it and then placed it on top of the grave. With a heavy heart, he began the walk back home.
Alone.
Present day
Why were people so incompetent? It was a question Aidan Shaughnessy asked himself far too many times a day. How difficult was it to follow instructions? How hard was it to read the damn directions?
“Clearly, it’s beyond anyone’s comprehension,” he muttered to himself as he walked through the model home of the new subdivision his company was working on.
The trim was crooked, the ceiling looked wavy, and the paint job was horrendous. Not only that, but when he reached the master bedroom, he saw the paint colors were completely wrong. Pulling out his phone, Aidan called his assistant and left her a message to get the designer on the job to meet him first thing Monday morning. It was already after seven at night, so Aidan knew no one would be around to clean up the mess now.
With a weary sigh, he shut off all the lights and was locking up the house when his phone rang. Looking at the screen on his smartphone, Aidan felt some of the tension ease from his body.
“Hey, Dad,” Aidan said into the phone. “I’m running a little bit behind but I promise to have the pizza there by the time the game starts.” He smiled at the thought of having a couple of hours just to unwind and relax with his family. Most men would cringe at spending a Friday night at home with their father and teenage sister, but it was something Aidan looked forward to.
“See that you do,” his father said with a chuckle. “Darcy is having a fit that you’re not here yet. She’s threatening to eat all the brownies herself before you get here!”
That made Aidan laugh because although his seventeen-year-old sister loved to bake, she loved taunting her brothers with her delicious creations even more. “Tell her if she does that, I’ll make sure neither of the pizzas have pepperoni. I’ll load them with mushrooms and anchovies before I let her take away my dessert!”
Ian Shaughnessy laughed hard. He loved that the age difference between his youngest child and his oldest didn’t deter them from bantering with and teasing one another. “Oh, I’ll tell her, but be prepared for her wrath if you are one minute late.”
“Deal,” Aidan said and then called in their order to the local pizzeria.
“Hey, Aidan,” Tony said as he answered the phone. “Your usual?”
Shaking his head, Aidan couldn’t help but laugh. Small-town living. “Hey, Tony,” he said with a smile. “What do you think?”
“Two large pies, one with extra cheese and pepperoni and the other with sausage. Gimme twenty minutes, okay?”
“You got it, Tony. Thanks.” Disconnecting, Aidan turned and looked at the house he had just locked up. At least it was beautiful from the outside. Between the stonework, the colors, and the craftsman style, it made for a very appealing home. Aidan had spared no expense on the materials for the model. Everything was top of the line, and he used every upgrade available inside and out to dazzle potential buyers.
Taking a couple of steps back, he admired the landscaping. The grounds looked ready for a
Home
and
Garden
photo spread. Everything was perfectly manicured, and all the greenery was acclimating to its new soil and cooperating by staying green and in bloom.
If only the inside were up to the same caliber…
“Okay, I have
got
to let that go for tonight,” he reminded himself as he walked over to his truck and climbed in. “Dad will have my hide if I spend the night complaining about work.”
You would think that at age thirty-four, parental disappointment wouldn’t faze a man, but Aidan was different. His father had been through so much in his life, had struggled so much after Aidan’s mother had died unexpectedly, that Aidan swore he would never do anything to cause his father any extra grief.
He left that to his siblings.
And they were good at it.
In the years following his mother’s death, Aidan had wanted to do more to help his family out. The day after the funeral, Aidan told his father he wanted to quit college and come home, but Ian had put his foot down. Aidan knew his mother wouldn’t have wanted him to leave college, but at the time, he’d felt so helpless.
When he blew out his knee in his junior year, it officially ended any dreams of a career in the NFL. But he wasn’t disappointed about that now; his life was exactly where it was supposed to be. He had a construction business he had built up all on his own, and he was surrounded—for the most part—by his family.
Some of his brothers had moved away from their small North Carolina town, but Aidan didn’t resent them for it. Quite the opposite, he encouraged them to follow their dreams because that was exactly what their mother would have done. With their father preoccupied with raising a teenage girl after a houseful of boys, Aidan had taken it upon himself to be “the encourager” in the family.
Did he date? Sometimes.
Was he looking to settle down? Maybe.
Were there any prospects on the horizon? No.
Maybe he should do something about that, he thought as he drove through town to pick up dinner. The streets were crowded, but that was nothing new. It was Friday night and everyone was out and about. As his truck crept along Main Street with the windows down, Aidan was able to smile and wave to many familiar faces. This was what he did, who he was. But for some reason, tonight it bothered him.
Why wasn’t he walking along the street holding hands with a woman? When exactly was the last time he had done that? Searching his memory, he couldn’t even remember when. Was it with Amber or Kelly? Hell, he couldn’t even remember their names or their faces. That was a surefire clue it had been too long.
“Nothing I can do about it tonight,” Aidan muttered and pulled into the last spot in front of the Italian restaurant. There was a line out the door and Aidan was relieved for the side entrance reserved for takeout orders. As he walked in, he was greeted by the same faces he saw in there every Friday night. But by the time Aidan had paid and was walking back out to his truck with the pizzas, he was feeling a little down for some reason.
Aidan had had too long a day to puzzle out the source of this sudden depression, however; for tonight, he vowed to enjoy himself. He loved catching up with what Darcy was up to and hearing about how she was doing in school. And even though Aidan and his dad saw each other on a daily basis because Ian Shaughnessy was in charge of all of the electrical inspections on new construction in the county, Aidan knew his dad always just liked having him around.
Ian was dedicated to his children, and it didn’t matter how old they got or how far away they moved: Ian Shaughnessy wanted nothing more than to see his children be happy.
Just as Lillian would have wanted.
Pulling up to his childhood home, Aidan felt a lot of the tension leave his body. This was his haven. No matter what was going on in his life, he still enjoyed coming back here and spending time. Not to mention that right now, the scent of hot pizza was practically making him drool and he had no doubt his little sister was pacing the floor waiting for him to get inside and feed her.
His suspicions were confirmed as soon as he walked through the door.
“It’s about time, Aidan!” his sister cried, grabbing the pizza boxes from his hands. “Honestly, a person could die of starvation waiting for you.”
“Ex
cuse
me, Duchess,” he said with a chuckle, “but some of us have to work for a living. We can’t all have food delivered on our every whim.”
She rolled her eyes at him as she placed the pizza on the kitchen table. “I would love to have a job, big Brother. But you and Dad and the rest of the Shaughnessy bullies won’t let me.”
“Bullies?” he asked with a laugh, washing his hands and winking at his father as he walked in from the living room where the pregame bantering was on. “There are Shaughnessy bullies? Why wasn’t I told of this?”
“Oh.” Darcy swatted his arm playfully. “You’re the captain of the bully squad.”
“Now we’re a squad?”
“Aidan!” she huffed, and plopped down into her seat at the table. “You know darn well you have been the biggest voice in keeping me from getting a job. If you would—”
“Darce, we’ve been over this before. You don’t
need
to work right now. You need to focus on your schoolwork so you can get into a good college.”
Darcy looked from her father to her brother and back again. “A good college? Don’t you really mean one that’s close to home?” This wasn’t a new argument, but Darcy was hoping she’d wear them down eventually.
“There are plenty of colleges close to home,” Aidan said evasively, reaching for a slice of the fast-cooling pizza.
“But I don’t want to go to any of them.”
“Can we please have one meal without an argument?” Ian finally chimed in.
“I’m not arguing, Dad,” Darcy countered. “I’m simply stating that there are plenty of great colleges that aren’t within a ten-mile radius of our house.”
“So in answer to your question, Dad,” Aidan said with a smile, “no. We cannot have one meal without an argument.” Normally that was all it took to get Darcy to back down, but tonight she slammed her palms on the table.
“Why won’t anyone take this seriously?” she snapped, looking at her father. “Everyone else was allowed to pick where they wanted to go to college. Why can’t I?”
“Come on, Darce,” Aidan interrupted. “It’s been a crappy day. Can’t we just enjoy dinner?”
If there was one thing Darcy had learned to perfect in her seventeen years, it was the art of the argument. She had even been on the debate team since her sophomore year, bringing home a trophy or two, and learning some skills that had come in very useful with her siblings. She thought of it as a form of mental self-defense. Unfortunately, she just didn’t have it in her tonight. Being the only female in a male-dominated household, there were so many things about her life that didn’t seem fair, but she had learned to accept most of them.
Out of her five brothers, she was probably closest to Aidan, even though he was the oldest. He was one of the few siblings who still lived in the area, so she saw him the most and she enjoyed spending time with him. Lately, she could tell something was up with him even though Aidan seemed unwilling to admit it.
Darcy could think of a million reasons why Aidan’s day had been crappy. All he did was work and go home alone and spend Friday nights having pizza with her and their father.
Bor-ing
. She wished he’d find someone and go out on a date. Have a social life. She supposed he was good-looking, but if he didn’t go out and find a girl soon, he was going to be old and gray and no one was going to want him. Probably not the best time to bring up the old and gray thing.
“Fine,” she grumbled. “Why was your day crappy?”
Finishing his slice of pizza, Aidan went to the refrigerator and grabbed himself the one beer he allowed himself every Friday night. “Oh, you know, it’s the same old thing. No one reads the instructions on the job site, things aren’t getting done the way I want them, my assistant is asking for an assistant. Nothing new.”
“Everything was looking good when I was on site on Tuesday,” Ian said. “What changed?”
“The paint job is crap, there’s some trim that’s messed up, and the decorator got all the color tones wrong. I did a walk-through tonight before I left, which is why I was late getting dinner, and I just couldn’t believe my eyes. It was as if I had never said a word about anything. I mean, how difficult is it to follow a set of plans?”
“So what are you going to do?” Ian asked, knowing his son was a perfectionist by nature and wouldn’t rest until everything was up to his standards.
“I’m bringing in a new painting crew, and I’ve put a call in to meet the decorator on Monday morning.” He shook his head. “Tired of wasting my time.”
“Ever think maybe you’re looking a little too closely at things?” Darcy asked, and then instantly regretted her comment when her brother aimed an angry glare in her direction.
“I look at things the way they are meant to be looked at,” he said defensively. “The craftsmanship I put out there is what makes Shaughnessy Construction stand out. If I relax my standards, then what?”
“Sorry,” she mumbled and reached for another slice of pizza.
“Aidan, don’t take it out on Darcy. All she’s saying is that you have a craftsman’s eye. The typical home owner and buyer won’t notice the things you see.”
“So that makes it right? That makes it okay to just put a crappy product out there? I can’t believe you would suggest such a thing.”
“I’m not suggesting anything of the sort, Son,” Ian said. “I’m just suggesting that you relax a bit.” He looked at Darcy slouching in her seat, staring at her plate, then back at Aidan, who looked ready to turn the table upside down. “Who’s up for a game of bowling?”
Darcy and Aidan looked up at him incredulously.
“Bowling?” Darcy repeated. “I’m not going to the bowling alley with my dad and brother on a Friday night. Forget about it.”
Now it was Ian’s turn to roll his eyes. “
Wii
bowling.” Ian pulled Darcy out of her seat and then turned to his son. “Don’t make me pull you up too. C’mon. Family bowling in the living room. Now. Let’s go!”
It was the last thing Aidan wanted to do, but he knew it would make his father happy so he didn’t argue. Five minutes later, the three of them were standing in the middle of the living room choosing their order of play. Ten minutes later, it was as if the earlier tension had never even happened.
And that was what was most important to Aidan—his family’s happiness.
* * *
Later that night, Aidan sat alone in his apartment. It was late, but his brain wouldn’t shut down enough for him to go to sleep. He was restless. His skin felt too tight for his body. And for the life of him, he didn’t know what to do about it.
Darcy’s comment about being too nitpicky wasn’t new, so he wondered if that was really enough to keep him awake.
Meticulous
was a word that was often thrown around when people talked about him. It didn’t bother him. Much. Meticulous could be a good thing, if his brothers didn’t add “anal-retentive control freak” to it all the damn time.