MacKenzie's Lady (15 page)

"I can't tell you. He's not suspected of murder, and that's all I'll say." He gestured sharply with his hand, swinging around to pin her to the chair with the harsh brilliance of his eyes. "I don't want to talk about your brother. I want to have your decision. We can make it work, Holly. Say yes."

Why, he really cares what my answer is
, she realized, feeling a flicker of warmth unfold at the thought. For all his tough talk and his obvious anger, he wanted her to say yes without a fight. He cared, at least a tiny bit.

She dropped her eyes away from his serious expression, unconsciously stroking her hand over her stomach as she tried to think clearly. She had been concerned about the gap being fatherless would leave in her child's life. Mac was offering not just a name, but a real father for the baby. He would be a good father, one who cared.

But there was more to consider than the child. Could she live with Mac without knowing what he felt for her? Could she bear it if the day came when she had to accept the fact that he could lever love her as she loved him? On the other hand, he had said that he was willing to work at making their marriage a good one. Could she turn her back on the chance that, once they were married, they could work their way through the obstacles between them and develop a relationship all the stronger for having been tested?

Really, what was there to debate? It was a choice between guaranteed nothing and a chance to have everything. She had to take that chance.

She raised her head and smiled faintly, struggling to control her trembling lips. "All right. I accept your proposal."

❧

Holly turned the narrow gold band on her finger and leaned against the wall next to the window. Married less than an hour and Mac had already disappeared to make a phone call. She supposed she was going to have to get used to that kind of thing. After all, her husband wasn't in an ordinary nine-to-five job.

"Husband." She repeated the word in her mind and then said it out loud once or twice, trying to make it seem real. Her lips tilted faintly. It wasn't going to seem real until Mac was there to hold her in his arms and make it feel real. He had swept her onto a plane, not even giving her time to pack her things, and she had thought ruefully that it was the second time in recent months that she had left a place and left everything behind.

The ceremony at the chapel had been brief and formal. Not really the stuff dreams were made of, but Holly didn't care. Mac was standing next to her and, for a few minutes, she indulged herself in a fantasy, pretending that they were marrying for all the right reasons. Reciting her vows in a trembling voice and hearing Mac's husky tones echoing them, she was suddenly confident that she had made the right decision.

A brief knock on the hotel room door drew her away from the window and she crossed the room. "Who is it?" Surely it was too late for maid service.

"It's Mac."

Her brows arched in surprise and then came together in a frown. He had a key to the room; why would he be knocking? Unless he was just being extra considerate? Her fingers worked the latch and opened the door to him.

He stepped into the room and leaned back against the door, watching her as she crossed to the mirror and picked up a brush. She began pulling it through her hair, more out of nervousness than anything else.

"I just thought I'd stop by and make sure you had everything you needed."

He didn't offer an explanation of the phone call, she noticed, and she knew better than to ask. His words registered as she realized that he was reaching for the doorknob. She hadn't had time to think about their sleeping arrangements, but she had assumed that they would be sharing a room, like any other couple. Despite the problems between them, she wanted their marriage to be a real one. How could they ever hope to work things out if they couldn't communicate on even that most fundamental level?

Holly turned to look at him, her hair falling in tousled curls around her face. "Where are you going?"

He cleared his throat, trying not to notice how incredibly desirable she was, trying to forget that she was now his wife. "I have a room on the floor above this one."

"But I thought... I mean, aren't we..." she stammered to a halt. There was no subtle way to tell him what she had thought. Obviously he didn't plan on sleeping with her. She could hardly beg him to stay, not even if her pride would permit it. She managed a smile but she half turned away so that he could not read the hurt in her eyes. "Never mind. Goodnight, Mac."

He hesitated, his hand on the doorknob. He should just leave it there, he told himself. Why look for trouble? He didn't want to stay, did he? But she looked so hurt.

"Holly, I..." He released the knob and ran his fingers through his hair, disarranging it into dark waves. "It's enough that you agreed to marry me. I bullied you into this but I'm not going to assume that gives me the right to your bed." One corner of his mustache twisted in a rueful smile. "I'm not quite that much of a monster."

Now it was her turn to hesitate. Pride told her to let him go. She moved to the small dresser and fiddled nervously with the few bottles she had set out there. The gleam of her wedding band caught the light. "I wouldn't think you were a monster."

The words were so low that he had to strain to hear them. For a moment his heart stopped beating, and when it started again, it was with a slow, heavy thud that almost suffocated him. He didn't want her—she had destroyed that by using him. He couldn't possibly want her.

Like hell he couldn't.

He crossed the room to stand behind her, his hands coming up to settle hesitantly on her shoulders. For a moment Holly was very still beneath his touch and then, with a sigh, she leaned back against his chest, letting the hard muscles support her. She felt his breath stir her hair and then his lips touched her temple in the lightest of kisses.

"Holly, you don't have to do this."

She opened her eyes as his lips continued their gentle, undemanding massage of her temple and her gaze was caught and held by her reflection in the mirror. In her silky dress, with her hair falling in soft disarray and her dark eyes wide with uncertainty, she looked fragile and wholly feminine.

In contrast, Mac's broad shoulders were surely the essence of solid masculinity. The darkness of his tanned hands stood out on the delicate fabric of her dress, the almost black of his hair mingling with the lighter brown of her curls as his mouth brushed her forehead. It was going to work out, she told herself. It had to.

His hands loosened on her shoulders, allowing her to turn into his arms. Her hands slid around his neck, her face tilting up to his. The look of need he read there was his undoing. All his rage and hurt ebbed away, leaving him nothing to hold between them. With a muffled groan of surrender, he bent to slip an arm beneath her knees and carried her to the bed. He set her down long enough to throw back the covers and then laid her gently on the sheets.

His eyes never left her face as he hastily discarded his jacket and yanked impatiently at his tie. Holly felt a sharp pang of anticipation in her stomach as he pulled off his shirt and she could see the naked breadth of his chest. Suddenly it seemed like years since he had touched her.

Her lashes fluttered down as he sank, naked, onto the bed beside her, his weight tilting the mattress. He undressed her slowly, his fingers just brushing her body, his touch almost impersonal. But the trembling in his hands and the ragged catch to his breathing told her that he was anything but impersonal.

She flushed, suddenly self-conscious as he lifted her dress over her head and then deftly peeled off her hose, dropping them at the foot of the bed. His fingers were shaking and it took him a moment to master the front catch of her lacy bra, but then she was lying almost naked beneath him, a pair of silk and lace panties her only covering.

He stared at her for a long, silent moment, the expression in his cerulean eyes hidden by the thickness of his lashes. Uncertain in the face of his silence, she moved her hands to cover the gentle swell of her stomach. Was he repulsed by the sight of her? His fingers caught hers and drew them away.

"No, don't hide from me. So beautiful." His huge palm pressed lightly on her belly and she was stunned to see the glitter of tears in his eyes before his gaze dropped away. He bent to place a heartbreakingly tender kiss against the mound that held his child and then laid his face against her silken skin.

Holly's hands came to rest in his thick, dark hair and she cradled him to her, blinking rapidly to control the sudden surge of moisture to her eyes. She felt a stab of guilt. How could she have planned to keep his child from him?

Gradually, tenderness eased into desire and the gentle pressure of his mouth on her stomach yielded to the more demanding touch of his mouth at her breasts. Whatever the problems that remained unresolved between them, physically they were still in tune.

There was an extra element of tenderness in his lovemaking but no less desire. Holly was swept up in a whirlwind until every last ounce of response was wrung from her. They came together at last in an explosion of passion that left them both panting and spent.

Holly snuggled against his side and was deep in sleep moments later. Mac lay next to her and stared at the darkened ceiling, wrestling with the confusing mixture of emotions that churned within him. How was it possible to both love and hate someone at the same time? Or was it himself he hated?

He still hadn't found the answers to his question, even when dawn found its way slowly into the room.

A
silver Ferrari was parked in the driveway and Ken was leaning casually against its side. Mac muttered a curse under his breath, almost the first words he had spoken since they had left Las Vegas, and pulled the sedan in next to the sports car.

"Is something wrong?"

He threw her a quick glance and she wondered if he'd forgotten her presence. It would certainly account for the hours of silence since they woke that morning.

"I don't know. Wait here a minute, would you?" He didn't wait to hear her murmur of agreement. He already had the door open and was swinging his long legs out.

Holly gave a soft sigh and reminded herself that Rome wasn't built in a day. She couldn't expect to establish a wonderful rapport with Mac without giving it some time. But wouldn't it be nice if he didn't pretend she wasn't there, she thought acidly.

Last night had been beautiful, far more than she had expected of her wedding night, considering the odd circumstances of their marriage. Mac had been tender and loving, and for a little while she had been able to pretend that everything was fine, that there were no lies, no secrets to come between them. She had imagined the last several weeks had never existed.

She hadn't expected that euphoria to last, but she hadn't expected to wake up next to a total stranger, either. Mac was polite but cold. No, "cold" was too active a word. He was distant, as if he didn't know her very well and didn't care to pursue the acquaintance.

Give it time, she cautioned herself. Don't expect everything to sort itself out magically. There's a lot of hurt on both sides. She was still working out her own pain, and she had to allow him that same privilege.

Mac approached Ken warily, a hint of stiffness in his lazy strides. "Problem?"

Ken nodded. "Reggie has been invited on a short boat trip and he's taking his financial consultant along. We're leaving in about two hours. It's a good thing you called last night to let me know when you were coming back. I managed to get the cruise set back a couple of hours." He glanced at Mac's car. "Daniels is not happy about your unscheduled trip."

"Daniels will just have to learn to live with it. Holly's pregnant."

"I know."

Mac stiffened, his eyes flaring brilliant sparks. "You knew about it?"

Ken held up one hand. "Before you tear my head off, I just found out yesterday. When you did your disappearing act, I checked the files. It wasn't hard to figure things out." He waited until Mac relaxed, and then smiled. "You're a little quick on the draw, aren't you, partner?"

Mac's fingers combed his hair. "I guess I'm a little uptight right now." He glanced at the car where Holly waited and felt his gut twist. "Listen, I'll go pack my financial adviser bag. Why don't you get Holly?" He was gone before Ken could reply.

It was cowardly. He knew it was cowardly but he welcomed the chance to get away for a while. He needed some time to gather himself together. As Ken had pointed out, he was a little quick on the draw these days, not quite in control. And being that little bit on edge was not a good thing. An agent had to be in control of himself. It was the only thing he could count on.

Holly smiled at Ken as he opened the car door and offered his hand to help her out.

"Hello, Holly. How are you?"

His eyes were a chill gray and his words were equally cool. Despite herself, Holly felt tears rise. She was beginning to feel as if the whole world was against her. She blinked and managed a tremulous smile.

"I think that's the first time you've ever used my name. I got kind of used to being called Lady."

He leaned into the back to get her two small bags on the back seat and then slammed the car door shut before turning to look at her.

"Things change. People change."

He would have gone around her but she reached out and caught his arm. He stiffened and she was afraid he would pull away and walk off, but after a long, tense moment, he turned to look at her, his youthful features unfamiliarly hard.

"I haven't changed, Ken."

"No? Well, maybe I have."

"Why are you so angry? What happened was between Mac and me. It had nothing to do with you."

She didn't know why she was bothering. It was obvious that he was carrying some kind of grudge. Naturally he would be on Mac's side. As Mac's partner, he must be investigating her brother, too. A familiar rush of anger stiffened her backbone when she thought of their spying on James.

"Never mind. I should have known you wouldn't be interested in both sides. You've tried and hanged my brother already. I don't see why I should expect any different treatment."

Ken dropped one of the bags, and it was his turn to catch her by the arm. "This has nothing to do with your brother, Lady." Neither of them noticed his slipping into the old form of address.

"It has everything to do with James! That's what started this whole mess! The two of you were sneaking around and trying to get me to give you information to use against him."

"What started this whole mess was your not having the sense of a peahen, Lady! If you had half the brains you lay claim to, you would never have stayed in that bar in Tijuana waiting for your snotty roommate's sleazy boyfriend to show up and deliver some souvenir!"

"It was not a souvenir! It was an heirloom and it meant a great deal to Maryann."

Ken went on as if Holly hadn't spoken. "And then Mac wouldn't have been using the agency computers—illegally—to track you down and we wouldn't have been assigned to this stupid case."

"And Maryann is not snotty!" She stopped as his last sentence registered. "Was Mac really using the computers to find me?"

"Yes, and he's lucky he didn't get docked five years' pay. They frown rather heavily on using the company computers for personal reasons. Didn't he tell you that?"

Holly frowned, trying to remember what had been said during that horrible scene after she found the folders. Yes, Mac had said something about trying to find her, but she had just dismissed it at the time.

"I think so, but I didn't believe him."

"I don't believe you," he muttered disgustedly, thrusting his fingers through his hair and ruining Reginald C. Naveroff's neatly combed waves. "What do you want from him? Are you trying to destroy him?"

"Of course not!" she snapped.

"Well, you damned near succeeded when you left before. And I'll tell you what makes it my business. I'm the one who scraped him off the floor and tried to put the pieces back together again. I don't think it would work a second time, Lady. You keep that in mind next time you get in a snit."

"I wasn't in a snit. He was investigating my brother. Do you hear what I'm saying?" It would have been difficult not to hear when her voice had risen to just under a shout. She took a deep breath, glancing at the peaceful neighborhood around her, and lowered her tone.

"He was using me to try to get evidence against my brother. He lied to me."

"He was doing his job. He didn't want this lousy case, but if he hadn't taken it, another agent would have. Would you have preferred someone else 'spying' on you?"

It was the same question Mac had asked her, and she still didn't have an answer. "Yes. No. I don't know."

"Well, while you're trying to make up your mind, think about the fact that Mac is the best in the business."

"All the better to hang my brother," she muttered bitterly.

"We're not trying to hang your brother. He was suspected long before we ever heard of him. All we're trying to do is find out the truth. And if you think he's so all-fired wonderful, then you shouldn't have any doubts that we'll find he's innocent. But one way or another, we've got to find out."

Holly blinked back tears. He had struck right at the root of her bitterness. "I'm not sure he is innocent," she whispered painfully. "I don't even know what he's accused of."

Ken hesitated, and she thought he was going to tell her what James was suspected of. With a sigh he released her arm and shook his head. "Sorry, Lady. I can't tell you anything."

"Your job." Her tone was laced with distaste, and his face hardened again.

"My job. And you might try looking at my job and Mac's as trying to prove your brother innocent, instead of acting as if we've already got the noose made up. We're not out to get anybody. We just want the truth."

"You can't expect me to like what you're doing."

He sighed. "No, but you can respect it. Don't torture Mac with it. He isn't even working on the case anymore, except to back me up when it's necessary."

She swallowed hard and looked up at him, her eyes bright with unshed tears. "I do love him, Ken, really I do, but it hurts sometimes."

His face softened. He never had been very good at staying angry. She was back. That was what really mattered. "He loves you, too, Lady. Don't ever doubt that. It almost killed him when you left him. I don't think he'd pull out of it again."

The front door slammed and both of them jumped slightly. Mac's long strides carried him across the lawn to where they stood, giving Ken time only to pick up the bags again. Mac had changed into a beautifully tailored suit more in keeping with his role. Horn-rimmed glasses dimmed the brilliance of his eyes, making him seem like a stranger. He took the glasses off, tucking them in an inside pocket, his gaze skimming alertly from Ken to Holly.

"I didn't realize the bags were so heavy you couldn't get them into the house."

Ken shrugged. "I was just asking Holly how her former roommate was doing."

Mac's brows shot up. "You were asking about Mary-ann?"

"Well, you know how it is, Mac. I like to keep track of the only woman who's ever resisted my fatal charm. We'd better hurry."

Mac reached out to take the bags from Ken, setting his own suitcase on the ground. "I'll take these in."

"I knew if I just delayed long enough, I could get out of carrying them in." Ken gave Holly an easy smile. "Nice to have you back, Lady. I'll take care of Mac for you."

"Thanks." Her smile was slightly shaky. She turned to follow Mac, feeling as if she had made a small start on putting things in order. Ken had forgiven her. Now if she and Mac could only learn to forgive each other.

Mac set her bags down just inside the door and turned to look at her, his eyes shadowed by thick lashes. "I don't know how you're situated financially, so I left some cash and a couple of credit cards on the breakfast bar, along with the keys to the sedan."

"Thanks. I left Baby with Maryann. I suspect she'll be glad to get rid of it."

He shifted restlessly. "I'd rather you drove the sedan. It's a lot safer." The tentative glow his concern brought was quenched by his next words. "I'd feel better about you and the baby."

"The baby. Yes, of course. How could I forget?" Her tone was flat, concealing hurt.

Mac arched one dark brow. "I don't know. It was the reason for this marriage." He regretted the cold words the moment they were said, but he didn't take them back. He was wrestling with the jealousy that had risen when he saw her on such apparently easy terms with Ken.

A chill silence settled between them. Holly didn't speak, afraid that her voice would betray how close to tears she was. Mac, too, was torn between conflicting urges. One was just to walk away and the other was to pull her close and promise her the moon if she'd only smile at him.

He shifted at last. "Well, I'd better get going. I shouldn't be gone more than a few days, ten at most. There's a card with a phone number along with the cash. If an emergency comes up, you can call and somebody will try to get a message to me."

"I'm sure I won't need it," she told him coolly. "I can always call on Maryann."

"Of course." His voice beat hers for sheer indifference. He took a step away, his eyes never leaving her downbent head. She said nothing. His hands clenched into fists. Damn her! Why did she tie him up in knots like this? With a muffled curse he closed the distance between them.

Holly's head jerked up in startled surprise as his fingers closed around the delicate bones of her shoulders. She caught only a glimpse of tormented blue eyes before his mouth met hers. It was a kiss that demanded everything she had to give and at the same time returned it a thousandfold. It was an all-too-brief glimpse of heaven.

He drew back, his eyes dark and disturbed. One palm came to rest possessively against the swell of her stomach but she knew his words were for her and not just the child she carried.

"Take care of yourself."

He was gone before she could do more than lift shaky fingers to her tingling mouth.