Lust (2 page)

“We've got loads of guys coming already. There'll be a ton of hotties for you to choose from.”

“But there's only one guy I'm really interested in, and he'll be in around three this afternoon for an espresso, so you can ask him then, can't you?” She casually picks up a broom and starts to sweep up with a vengeance behind the counter, her eyes flicking up and down to mine in between broom strokes.

I blow out a noisy breath of irritation.

Our party is a joint twenty third birthday bash, as our birthdays are only two days apart. Charlotte suggested it and offered to pay for it all, as I'm stony broke. I promised I'll pay her back a few dollars here and there, once I'm up and running. We're holding it here, in Coffee Haven. She arranged it with the owner and has persuaded an old conquest to act as bartender and another to DJ. We have lots of bottles of beer and wine, which she's stockpiled over the last month. So far we have a hundred people coming. Some college and Central University friends, and people from the clubs and bars we hang out in. It should be a hot night and I'm looking forward to it.

I suppose I'll have to do it for her. I do owe her, for getting me this job. But having thought about it, I hope Sean can't make it, because I'm not sure I want him to come. The fact that he'll be in my space, could shatter my calm and possibly ruin my evening. He hit on me after a mere minute. My instincts tell me he's far more interested in me, and I have Charlotte to think about. She's my best friend and that means a lot. Way more than she knows. She's into this guy. Longer term into. It would be awful if Sean screwed her over, and came on to me instead. I really don't want her to be upset at her birthday party.

Charlie and I met at our first year in CUNY, and I quickly picked up on the fact she was very into having sex with men. She's badly addicted, picking up a vast number at the bars and clubs we go to, constantly adding to her swelling collection of conquests. I'm pretty sure Sean would be the biggest notch on her bed post yet. The king of notches.

And he'd be mine, in my little world of sexual fantasy.

In reality, I tend to be more relationship grounded. I like to get to know guys for more than a few hours before I move to the physical aspect. I'm subtly trying to retrain Charlotte, to curb her rampant appetite for speed and quantity and to encourage her to slow down and date rather than constantly hook up for one nighters. It's destructive and pointless. I know most guys think she's so easy, and she is. Not that she seems to care a fuck about her reputation. I've taken it upon myself to care on her behalf, and encourage her to develop some kind of relationship with guys, and not to view them all as sexy red meat.

And she's improving. She's been on some dates. Nothing more than a few times, but it's a start.

As for Sean, I'm not sure what she's planning with him.

“How come you never mentioned Sean to me before, if you're so obsessed and he's that important to you?” I ask, probing for more. She's obviously been hiding this burning passion for him for some reason.

“Because I don't want you interfering.” Her answer comes back fast and not so hidden. I don't think interfering is the right word. I think she means stealing.

I laugh as she gives me a warning look.

“Okay, I get the message. He's yours, period.”

He may be hers in her mind, but I sense the poor girl is heading for a fall one way or another. And I don't suppose she'll listen to me for a second
.

I sigh in resignation. She obviously needs to get him out of her system. Perhaps the party could make her see he's not interested. It'll hurt, but I can't guard her from that. And who knows, they might even hit it off, I tell myself, unconvinced. 

It's nearly four in the afternoon, thankfully there's no sign of Sean, and the customers are currently zero. Everything's tidy and clean. As I've proven myself to be competent, Charlotte has left me alone for a while, to go to the dental hygienist for a quick polish. I take this quiet opportunity to scour the Internet for jobs, using the till screen. In the past ten months, since gaining my degree, I've done cleaning, pizza delivery and now I'm working in this coffee shop, Coffee Haven, which is the best job so far. But I want to use my education better. I majored in English Arts and Literature, and did a one year post grad in Journalism. I want to break into that field of work, but it may take a while. At an interview I attended recently, for a well known health and fitness magazine, they had two hundred applicants for the position of a lowly office runner. And all had a degree. That wiped out my enthusiasm for a while. But I'm up and running again. I'm sure I'll get something worthwhile if I keep trying.

I find a few decent jobs to apply for and write some details down to send them my resume and a cover letter later.

I've just finished when the door swings open and I look up to see Sean has arrived, albeit a little late, for his afternoon fix.

But he's not alone. He's accompanied by an older woman. She's a little bit funky, but also very stylish. Sixty, I'd guess. Her gray hair is cut in an asymmetric bob, with one of those tiny fringes, that suit artistic types. Long dangling earrings sweep her shoulders. As they arrive in front of me I notice her face is made up expertly. Her smart charcoal gray dress looks like it could be a designer label. The cut is just so perfect, and fits her very slim body like a glove.

“Hi,” I smile broadly at Sean and at his companion.

I can't invite him in front of her. It's kinda awkward. It'll have to wait until tomorrow.

“Melissa, meet Maxine,” Sean introduces us. “She's my photographer.”

She turns her head toward him. “Excuse me, darling. I think you'll find that you are '
my
' model.” She tuts at him, rolls her eyes and sticks her nose in the air. I just love her accent. It's upper class English. A little nasal with strangulated vowels.

“Don't be so tetchy, it was a figure of speech, that's all,” he protests.

“I know exactly what it was,” she pokes him in the chest with a peach colored fingernail. “You were trying to exert your dominance over me, as usual.”

I cringe behind the till, trying to look busy, tapping some buttons on the screen.

“I'm not trying or exerting at all, it just happens, naturally.”

I cast a glance at her diminutive form, and then his, towering a good eight inches taller and far wider.

I think he has a point.

“Well try to be less natural in future.”

“I'll do my best to suppress any stray male characteristics in public.”

“As long as we have that straight,” she giggles, and hugs him briefly.

He hugs her back and laughs at her smiling upturned face.

Lucky Maxine,
I think.

Surely I can't be envious of a gray haired sixty year old woman? But it seems I am.

“Don't take any notice of us, we fight like cat and dog,” Maxine apologizes, with a smile.

“It's nice to meet you anyway, Maxine. And call me, Lissa.” I smile warmly at her and Sean.

“And how are you doing so far? First day on the job, so Sean tells me.” I'm amazed he's discussed me with her. I must have made an impression in his mind that he didn't forget me the second he went out the door. I notice Sean is examining the chocolate cookies. He obviously likes chocolate.

I have a chocolate fantasy, which I love to indulge. I start one end of a long thin chocolate bar, and my dream chocoholic guy starts the other. We're not allowed to bite, just suck and lick until it all melts in the warmth of our mouths and all around our lips. Until finally, we meet in the middle in an orgasmic chocolate kiss, where we lick each others faces clean. I'm staring at Sean's mouth and imagining myself licking it and his tongue all over mine.

I leave my heavenly erotic fantasy and hurtle back to earth with a bump.

“I'm doing good, thanks. Just getting used to the routine, and all that...anyway...what can I get you guys ?”

“I'll have a primo cappuccino, no sugar, please, and we're sitting in,” she says.

I turn my attention to Sean. “Charlie tells me you're on the espresso, pm?”

“That's right, and make it a double. I need an extra hard hit to get through the rest of my afternoon with Maxine, I think she may be in one of her feminist moods.”

“Pardon? So I'm feminist and moody, am I? What a gentleman you are at times,” she says, pulling an unamused face at him.

“I consider myself to be a gentleman
at all times
,” he replies, stressing his words in a tone that implies he actually does.

“Do you? I can't fathom why.” She folds her arms and stares up at him with raised eyebrows.

“Why don't you just whip my goddamn ass and get it done with?” he replies, shortly.

“I'd love to whip your backside, darling, but I don't think you'll see that as punishment.”

“I might, if you whip me hard and long enough. Keep going till I scream in pain and beg for mercy at your sweet Gucci feet,” he grins at her and gives me a wink.

He has just become so hot and delicious, I'm salivating, and about to drool down my shirt.

She sighs loudly. “You're such a bad boy.”

It seems Maxine and I agree on Sean in principle.

“And you're a real ball breaker,” he replies.

Maxine giggles, “If I were a few decades younger I'd do more than break your balls.” She brushes the back of her fingers down his cheek, sensually.

“If you were, I'd let you. But as you're not, I'll continue to respect your age, wisdom, talent and beauty.”

The two of them chuckle together, a little dirtily, I notice.

I process their payment in amusement. I'm enjoying their banter now I know it's playful.

“If you'd like to take a seat. I'll bring them over. With a complimentary whip...I mean cookie...” I offer with a sweet smile.

I see his expression change, his eyes flare with a real surge of interest. I subtly eye him up, flicking my gaze up and down him appreciatively. I think I could look at him all day and all night. Until my eyes are scorched and burned to a crisp. Then I remember, yet again, he's Charlie's. I stop my eyes wandering over his dark blue denim hips. Unfortunately I can't stop him eying me up, which he is now very into. I'm flustered at the way his eyes are roaming around my body. Actually, they're just roaming around my tits. Up and down the valley and peaks. I'm burning up, imagining what he's thinking.

I turn away to compose myself. While their java brews and trickles into the cups, I calm down and busy myself with the very frequent and tedious coffee machine cleaning duty, which I am fast coming to hate.

They wander off to the far end and sit down. I can see, despite the age gap, gender difference, and constant verbal antagonism, they're at ease with each other. But I suppose they would be. Like an artist and her muse. They converse continually, little comments and animated sentences flowing like a current between them. But I can't hear what they're saying, even though I'm straining my ears like hell. A high pitched tinkly laugh, and a contrasting deep chuckle, fills the air, teasing me.

I finish the drinks and nervously carry them over to their table on a tray, complete with napkins and two small complimentary chocolate cookies. I'm very aware they're both watching me as I walk toward them.

He lounges on his seat, like he owns it. His jean clad legs are sprawled out lazily to the side, crossed at the ankles, big desert style boots on his big feet. Everything about him is just so large—so substantial. A rush of heat travels through me at the suggestion of size. I notice his heavily muscled arm is draped casually over the chair back. Sean can definitely pose. I bet he does it in his sleep. But I guess, being a model, it would come naturally to him—as naturally as sleep itself would. He probably doesn't even realize he's doing it.

In contrast, Maxine sits demurely, in a very ladylike cross legged stance, straight backed and beautifully elegant.

His eyes are on mine. “Thanks, Lissa,” he says. But I look away. I can't hold his gaze anymore. My reaction to him is becoming far too strong. I'm so hot and my heart thumps wildly inside me. I'm beginning to understand Charlie's strength of obsession with Sean.

“Thank you, dear,” Maxine says.

“You're very welcome,” I reply.

They both stare at me, I can feel their eyes running over my whole body as I move the drinks from the tray to the table.

I feel incredibly self conscious.

Why are they staring at me in this way? It's like I'm a freak show or something.

“Can I get you anything else?” I manage, standing up straight, holding the tray protectively in front of my chest and preparing to run.

“No, were fine, thanks,” he answers.

I walk deliberately slowly back to my position behind the counter, feeling a wave of pure relief that I'm out of their intense space, but at the same time, perversely, I'm dying to get back in it.

I catch his eye across the room, and he raises his eyebrows at me, just a touch, as his mouth breaks into a broad grin. It's a smoldering, body stroking look. I can't help but sigh.

Sean, you're so, so sexy.