Luke: A West Bend Saints Romance (30 page)

RIVER

The early morning sunlight streamed through the windows, illuminating everything inside in its cool glow.  I ran my fingers lightly across Elias' chest, watching it rise and fall as he breathed in deeply, dead to the world.  I glanced over at the clock on the desk - seven in the morning.  I couldn't remember the last time I'd been awake this early when I hadn't pulled an all-nighter partying or touring with Viper's band a couple years ago.

I slipped out of bed and padded quietly across the floor to the bathroom, trying to be as silent as I could when I ran the water to brush my teeth.  When I came out, Elias was awake.  "Sorry," I said, suddenly feeling self-conscious, standing there naked in front of him.  "I tried to be quiet.  I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's all right," he said.  "I usually don't sleep this much at all, actually."  I watched him slip on his leg and stand up, hearing it click into place.  He walked by me to the bathroom, his cock hard, and slapped me lightly on the ass as he passed me.  "But seeing you naked is waking me up now."

When he came out of the bathroom, he took off his prosthetic again and laid down beside me on the bed, pulling my head against his chest.  He didn't say anything, but I could hear his heart beating, rapid, underneath my ear.

"How did you lose it?" I asked.  

"IED - Improvised Explosive Device," he said.  "I'm - I was - EOD."  He paused, looked at me before explaining.  "Explosive ordnance disposal.  We clear bombs.  Cleared, I mean.  I used to clear bombs.  Obviously, I cleared one with my leg.  That's not how you're supposed to do it."  He laughed, then cleared his throat.  "Sorry.  Gallows humor."

I rolled over onto my side, rested my hand lightly against his chest.  "Where were you deployed?"

"Afghanistan," he said.

"You're not in the EOD anymore?"  I asked.  For someone who wasn't in the military, he sure had a military look about him.  I'd thought that when I first saw him, with the buzzed haircut and the tattoos and his general demeanor.

He shook his head.  "Medically retired," he said.  His words had a tinge of disgust.

"You don't want to be retired?" I asked.

"Hell no," he said.  "I could do my job just fine with the leg.  I wanted to deploy again."

"So what happened?"

Elias rolled his eyes.  "Retired because of PTSD, which is bullshit," he said.

"Because you don't have it?"

"Hell no, I don't," he said.  "That’s just what they called it.  Got medically retired instead of getting administratively discharged for a repeated pattern of insubordination.”  He emphasized the last phrase and rolled his eyes, but continued talking.  “I was on limited duty because of my leg.  Couldn’t fucking deal with all the bullshit paper pushers I got assigned to.  Fucking caused more problems than when I was in EOD.  Ended up getting into it with my lieutenant, this douchebag who’d never deployed, gone outside the wire ever.”

“Outside the wire?”

“So you've got a base or a camp when you’re deployed, right?” he asked.  “The perimeter is the wire.  Fobbits like him, they stay inside the wire during deployment.  Don’t fucking understand how the real world operates.”

“You got kicked out because you got into it with your lieutenant?” I asked.  “That seems like a pretty harsh response.”

Elias shrugged.  “I guess it was a little more than just getting into it.  I punched him in the face.  Went to captain’s mast for it.”  He must have seen the confused look on my face, because he elaborated.  “That’s when you have to go up to see the old man - the commanding officer- he decides your punishment, knocks you down in rank and that kind of shit.”

“So he kicked you out,” I said.

Elias shook his head.  “No,” he said.  “That has to go through a legal process.  He knocked me down in rank and I had to forfeit my pay, but I wasn’t charged with assault.  I should have been, but they cut me some slack or whatever.  Captain said he thought I needed to see a shrink or something.”

“Did it help?” I asked.

"I’m not broken,” he said.  “Just cause I lost my leg doesn’t mean I can’t take care of my own shit.”

"Obviously," I said.  It came out more sarcastic sounding than I intended.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

I shrugged.  “Nothing," I said.  "You just seem like the kind of guy who doesn't rely on anyone."

He narrowed his eyes but didn't say anything.  I deliberately left out what I was going to say, which was that anger management didn't seem like the worst idea in the world for someone who got so easily irritated.

"It's not really my thing, relying on people," he said.

"No kidding."

He was quiet for a while, but I could see the gears turning in his head.  "I do get irritable," he said.  "In the parking lot of the store, I didn't mean to jump your shit for looking at my leg."

"No worries," I said.  "I figure it's a sore spot."

"It's not, though," he said.  "Not really.  Doesn't bother me, I mean.  I'm luckier than a lot of other guys.  It's just a leg, anyway.  I'm fucking bionic and shit now."

I trailed my hand down his trim abdomen, then lower, watching his cock respond to my touch.  "You might as well be bionic here, too," I said, my attempt to lighten the mood.

He grinned, making the sides of his blue eyes crinkle.  I didn't know what exactly he was carrying with him, but it looked like the weight of the world on his shoulders- until he smiled.  Then it was like everything melted away.

"You want me to show you bionic?" he asked, his voice low.  I wrapped my hand around the base of his cock, felt it harden at my touch.

"Is that a promise?" I asked.  I ran my hand lightly up his cock and down again, rubbed my thumb over the bead of pre-cum already glistening on the head.

"Come here and I'll show you," he said.  He pulled me against him, his hardness pressing against me, and kissed me.  When he slipped his hand between my legs, it made me gasp.  "I guess you like bionic."

"Just a little," I said.  I was starting to think I liked it a lot more than a little.

***

Afterward, his fingers traced their way lazily down my arm.  "I was thinking you probably needed help with getting a rental car this morning," he said.  "Right?"

"That would be nice," I said, clearing my throat.  "If you wanted to.  There's also probably a store open now."

"Fuck, yeah," he said.  "I made you a promise last night."

I felt my face flush warm at the thought of what I wanted him to do to me.

"You know how long you're staying?"

"I haven't thought about it," I said.  That much was true.  None of this had been planned.  I had no idea what I was doing here, in West Bend or with him.  The entire thing was insane.  It was insane to even think about staying here for a few days.  I should go back to my life.  I needed to go back to my life.  Running from a film set was crazy.  It wasn't something you did.  I couldn't imagine the shitstorm that was going to happen.

I felt his hand over my chest.  "Your heart is racing," he said, his voice soft.  "And you're all tense."

"I don't know what I'm going to do," I said.  "How long I'll stay."  That's not true.  I knew I couldn't stay long.

"And that's why you're tense?"

"No," I admitted.  "It's the thought of what is waiting for me when I go back- the questions, the decisions I need to make..."

"About Viper," he said.

"About everything."  I already knew what I wanted to do about Viper.  That wasn't even a decision.  I wanted him gone, out of my life completely.  It was everything else I didn't know how to handle - my family, my career- those were the big questions.  Those were the things I couldn't explain- didn't want to explain to a stranger.  How could I explain how fucked up it was, the fact that my mother was who she was, that I kept supporting her after everything she'd done to me, that she still did to me?  It was this weird, dysfunctional thing, my relationship with my family.

It was embarrassing.

I couldn't explain it to an outsider.

He didn't ask me to elaborate.  "Are you starving?" he asked.  "I'm hungry."

I was grateful he changed the subject.  "Absolutely."

***

"You sure you want to eat outside?" June asked.  "I only have this small table out here, so you'll have to do some balancing with your plates, especially on these rocking chairs."

"I think we're okay," I said.  "It's so beautiful out here.  I don't get the chance to do this kind of thing very often."  Sitting outside on the front porch like this, enjoying the crisp Colorado air, away from smog-infested Los Angeles, made me almost feel like a regular person.  June's border collie, Bailey, curled up a few feet away, basking in the sunlight.

June looked back and forth from Elias to me.  "I hope you had a good night's sleep," she said, as she bent down to set a basket of muffins and a bowl of fruit on the small table between our chairs.  When she stood up, her expression looked innocent, but her eyes twinkled.

"Great night's sleep," Elias said.  "Best night of sleep I've ever had, actually."

Cade walked across the meadow between the houses, Stan perched on his hip.  He set him down, and Stan toddled around the front porch, exploring.  "Hey, babe."  Cade kissed June on the cheek.  "Good morning."

"He's so cute," I said, as Stan put his little arms around Bailey and Bailey sighed.

"Cute and a handful," Cade said.  "Since he started walking, he's on the move all the time.  Came by to see if you needed anything in town, babe."

"I'll go inside and get my list for you," June said.  "Keep an eye on Stan for a minute?"

"Did you need that rental?" Cade turned toward me.

"I'll take her into town to get it."  Elias spoke quickly.  "If you want, I mean."

I nodded.  "That would be nice."

June walked out, and slid her arms around Cade.  He took the paper from her hand.  "I won't be home until lunch," he said.  "I've got a piece I'm working on for Randall Edwards, and then I'll grab the stuff you need from the store."

June shook her head.  "I don't like that guy," she said.  "He's not good for this town."

Cade shrugged.  "Can't choose your customers," he said.  He kissed her on the cheek, and then walked over to little Stan, kissing him on the forehead.  "See you later, buddy."

June's expression was dark, as she watched Cade walked back to the house and get on his motorcycle.

Elias had a funny look on his face.  "Trouble in West Bend?"  he asked.

June didn't look at him when she answered.  She shook her head.  "Just small town politics," she said.  "It would probably seem silly to you, being from the big city and all.  Cade is doing a custom job for this guy, works with this company, wants to set up shop in West Bend."

"Doesn't sound like you think that's a good idea," Elias said.  I wondered why he was interested in small town politics in a town he didn't seem to want to even be in again.  But I guess he was probably still tied to his hometown.  I didn't have the same interest in mine.  My hometown could burn, for all I cared.

June exhaled.  "A lot of people are for it," she said.  "This company, it would mean jobs for a lot of people locally.  Some of the locals here are in favor of it.  I'm not a fan of it.  Don't like the idea of some company coming in here and drilling away at West Bend."

"An oil company?"  I asked.  "Do they drill for oil in Colorado?"

June shook her head.  "Minerals," she said.  "Mining.  A lot of people here are getting offers on their land."

Elias cleared his throat, and June looked over at Stan.  "Excuse me while I grab my child, before he eats Bailey's fur.  We're going to leave you two alone now, give you some space.  Just wanted to drop off some breakfast, make sure you didn't need anything."

"Thank you, June," I said.

After June left, Elias appeared to be deep in thought.  I wasn't sure what that was about, but something June had said was bothering him.

I didn't ask what.

"Well," I said, changing the subject, "do you want to go get cleaned up, and take me into town?"

Elias smiled, but he still stared off into the distance as he answered, and I could tell his thoughts were someplace else.  "Depends," he said.

"On what?"  I asked.

"On whether you want to get dirty with me later."

"There is a convenience store in this town of yours, right?" I asked, thinking of the condoms.

Elias nodded.  "Sure is."

"I would definitely like to get dirty with you," I said, my heart racing at the thought.  In fact, it was the only thing I could think about.

***

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

ELIAS

River tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear, smoothing it, but it came back out again, sticking up at an angle, unwilling to be restrained.  I hid a smile.  When I'd looked her up on the internet yesterday, I saw all these photos of her at events with long blonde hair, flashing big smiles and posing for the cameras. 

She looked better with the shorter hair.  It suited her somehow- messy and unruly, refusing to be tamed.

She tapped the pad of her finger on the counter in the rental car office, a nervous habit, I decided.

"Anyone ever tell you that you look like that actress?" the rental agent asked, turning River's license over in his hand.  I knew it was a fake, and wondered how passable it was.  Not like the agent seemed like any kind of expert in sussing out fake licenses, not in a place that rented cars out of the back of a fishing tackle store.

River nodded and rolled her eyes.  "I get that a lot," she said.  "Sucks.  I hear she's a real bitch."

I coughed, covering my laugh.

River signed the paperwork and took the keys.  "Thanks a lot," she said.

"Welcome," the agent said, only half paying attention to her, his gaze focused more on me.  "Recognized you when you came in here."

"Oh, I'm not her -" River started, but the agent continued, looking at me.

"Heard about your dad," he said.

I sighed.  The last thing I fucking wanted to do was talk to someone who knew my father.  I didn't need to hear about what a great guy he was from one of the alcoholics he used to drink with down at the bar or something.  "Yeah, well, that's life.  Thanks for the rental."

I turned to leave, my hand on the small of River's back as I guided her ahead of me.  I wanted out of there before I got drawn into some bullshit conversation about my shitbag father.  He was the last person on this green earth I wanted to think about.

The agent called after us.  "Least your mother can get that property squared away now," he said.

I didn't turn around to listen to any more, and what he said didn't even register in my brain until we were outside, walking down the sidewalk ten yards.

Your mother can get that property squared away now.

What the hell was he talking about?

River's voice cut through my thoughts.  "What did he mean, he heard about your dad?"

"Nothing," I said, my voice sharp.  "None of your business."

Shit.
  As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted them.  River looked hurt, and then she clenched her jaw, a cold expression settling over her.

"River - "  I started, but she held up her hand.

"You're right," she said.  "None of this is my business."

I opened my mouth to apologize, but before I could, I heard a voice from the past beside me. 

Not now.  This is the last fucking thing I need.

"Well, what the hell do we have here?" the voice asked, his tone less than friendly.  "Elias Saint.  And who are you?"

River narrowed her eyes at the man standing before us in a law enforcement uniform.  "Beth Winters," she lied, crossing her arms over her chest.  "Who are you?"

He looked at her for a long time, his eyes lingering on her face, and I had a sudden feeling of rage I forced myself to quell.  The way he was looking at her....if his eyes had gone anywhere else but her face, I would have beat his ass right there in the street, cop or no cop.

"Jed Easton," he said.  "Sherriff Easton, that is."

River's mouth was drawn tight and I saw her tapping her fingers against her side, tucked up underneath her crossed arms.  She was irritated, that much I could tell; I wasn't sure if it was at me or Jed, or maybe at Jed for arriving right when she was about to tell me to fuck off.

I should have been grateful for Jed's timely arrival.

Except I wasn't.

Not only because Jed was a douchebag, but because part of me wanted River to tell me to fuck off.  It's what I deserved.

"What brings you to West Bend?" he asked, his eyes still on River.

"Vacation," she said.  "Taking in the sights, you know.  Small towns like these are a passion of mine."

"And this Saint boy," Jed said.  "He's an acquaintance of yours?"

My blood boiled, and I clenched my fists.  I was going to lay this asshole out for calling me
boy.

River's eyes widened and she looked at me.  "I'd hardly call him a boy," she said, smirking.  "Hung like a fucking horse.  I'd say he probably has several inches on you."  She leaned closer to Jed and raised her eyebrows.  "Knows how to use them real good, too."

I had to keep my jaw from dropping, listening to River talk.  No girl had ever taken up for me.

Hell, no one in my life had ever taken up for me.  If there's anything I was used to doing, it was fighting my own battles.

I didn't know what the fuck to think about this girl.

Jed's face was red as he turned away from her and faced me.  "You watch yourself," he said.  "This town doesn't need your kind here causing trouble - not you or your brothers."

"Fuck you, Jed," I spat.

He smiled and nodded, then turned to leave.  I watched him through narrowed eyes as he paused, then turned back toward us.  "Oh - one more thing.  Give your mother my father's regards," he said.

My heart racing, blood pumping loudly in my ears, I barely registered River's hand on my arm.  "Fuck!" I said loudly, enough that a couple passing on the sidewalk stopped and stared.

Fucking Jed.

"River, I - " I started, but she interrupted me, holding her hand up.

"Whatever it is," she said.  "I don't want to know.  It's none of my fucking business."

"River, I didn't mean to - "

She shook her head.  "Just because I defended you, doesn't mean I'm okay with you being a dickhead," she said.  "I just don't like bullies, and that guy strikes me as a bully."

"One of the worst kinds," I agreed.

"Thanks for the ride, Elias," she said, the car keys dangling from her fingers.  She turned to leave.

I stood there and watched her walk away. 
Jesus Christ.
  I wasn't used to having to watch my attitude, make sure I didn't snap at people.

I was used to dealing with subordinates, people I was in charge of in the Navy.  Most of them fucking got out of my way.

I felt a pang of regret. 
Shit.

This is not how I'd planned on spending the rest of the day, dealing with family bullshit.  I'd planned on spending it screwing the absolute hell out of River, but I'd fucked that part up.

I needed to fix it
, I thought. 
Later.  I would fix it with her.

Everything else was eclipsed by the thought of what Jed had said.  And what the rental manager had mentioned.  My mother had some questions she needed to answer.

Between whatever bullshit was with her, and Silas' cryptic crap, there were too many fucking secrets.

***

RIVER

It's none of your business.

Elias' words echoed in my head as I closed the car door and walked back up to the bed and breakfast.  After I'd left him in town, I'd waited and watched him stride off back to his car like a man on a mission.

Angry at the world,
I told myself.  And he didn't even fucking realize it.

What the hell did I care, anyway?  He was right; it wasn't any of my fucking business.  Just because I was sleeping with him - no,
scratch that
since we hadn't even screwed yet- didn't mean I needed to know who he was.  I was taking some time here in West Bend, just a few days, and that was that.

This was just a break from my normal life.

I needed to remember that.

A couple of days off the grid and I would get back to it.  I needed to get back to it.  Monday, when I didn't show up for filming, the studio would be fucking pissed.  We were near the end of this film, and they'd probably figure I went off the deep end or something, lost my damn mind, with everything that had just happened with Viper.  They'd film without me in the meantime, but someone would be looking for me.  Soon.

I walked through town, browsing in a few of the store windows, the spaces decorated with country knick-knacks, cowboy clothing and boots.  Being here was like stepping back in time.

It was almost enough to forget everything that had happened, back in the real world.  Back in Hollywood.  Not that Hollywood was anything like the real world; I wasn't delusional enough to think that.  But it was my reality.

I just didn't know if I wanted it to be my future.

When I returned to the bed and breakfast, Cade and June were on the front porch, and June had a picnic basket in her hand.  She held it up when I got out of the car. 

"We were just making some lunch," she said.  "So I figured I'd bring you some stuff over, drop if off in case you were hungry and didn't feel like cooking.  Cade makes a mean chicken salad."

Cade was standing beside her, a half-eaten sandwich in his hand.  "Secret ingredient is curry," he said.  "June's been eating it by the truckload since she got pregnant."

"The kid is going to hate chicken salad," June said.

"Well, with an endorsement like that, how could I not try it?"  I opened the front door.  "Is there enough in there for all of us?  Would you stay and have lunch with me?"

"Sure," June said.  Then, to Stan, "Baby, come this way."  He was picking the petals off flowers in a pot near the door.  "Don't eat those."

Inside, June set out plates and Cade sat with Stan on his lap. 

"It's good," I said as I bit into my sandwich.  "Really good."

Cade smiled.

"He's a great cook," June said.  "Does better than me with a lot of it.  The muffins this morning?  His recipe."

"You're like a jack of all trades," I said.  "You keep up with the horses and everything here too?"

Cade nodded.  "Part of running a ranch," he said.  "Got a couple ranch hands helping out now that I'm at the shop more, though."

"I saw your shop today when I was getting a car," I said.  "Closed for lunch- obviously you were here."

We ate for a few minutes in silence, but it wasn't the kind of awkward silence I usually felt around people.  June and Cade were easy to be around.

Then I asked the question that had been on my mind since I'd left town.  "Do you know anything about the Saint brothers?"

It was like all the air had been sucked out of the room.  "Where did you hear that name?" June asked.

"Elias Saint."  I blurted out the words before I could think about stopping myself.  "He's the guy who was with me here."

A dark look crossed Cade's face and looked at June meaningfully.  "You known him long?" he asked.

"Not really," I admitted.  "He helped me out of a jam."  I didn't elaborate, feeling suddenly uncomfortable with the fact that I'd brought it up, since both of them clearly knew his name.

"He's not someone you should be spending time with," Cade said, his tone gruff.

"Cade, you don't know that," June said, her voice stern.  She gave him a look.

"A leopard doesn't change his spots," Cade said.

"It's not fair," June said, "Him paying for his brother's sins.  He was a kid then."

Cade grunted, and stepped away from the table, kissing his wife on the top of his head before he started for the door.  "Need to get back to the shop," he said, passing Stan to her

"Bye-bye," Stan babbled.

Cade kissed the top of his head.  "Bye-bye, baby," he said.  Then he looked up at June and I.  "That family's no good, the whole lot of them."

After Cade left, June turned to me.  "Don't mind him," she said.  "He's not closed-minded in a lot of ways, but when it comes to me, he is."

"I don't understand," I said.  I didn't know what Elias or his family had done, but this town seemed to be focused on it.

"What he said isn't right," June said.  "About his family.  They're not all bad.  The father - Abraham Saint -
was
a piece of work, as I remember, drunk a lot.  Think he used to beat up on the kids.  But he's dead now - just died, a week ago?  Maybe two weeks?  I can't keep up with things lately."

A week or two.

It had to be why Elias was coming back here.  He hadn't said anything.

But then, why should he, to some casual fling?

“I don’t understand,” I said.  “So they’re all bad seeds because of Elias’ father?”  I might have grown up in a small town, and understood how petty and mean life in a small town could be, but this seemed extreme, even to me.

June shook her head.  She sat Stan down on the ground, then got up and opened a cabinet, dragging out some toys and setting them in the middle of the floor.  “I don’t think Elias is a bad seed, honey,” she said.  “He seemed like a nice guy.  Seems to like you a whole lot, too.”