Lucy and Her Scottish Laird (26 page)

“You look tired, Lucy,” Meg said. “We should go to bed.”

Lucy nodded. Yes, she was tired, for her sleep last night had been interrupted by dreams of lovemaking with Broxburn, when nothing else mattered but the
feel of his mouth on hers, and the quickening of desire deep within her body. She wanted more than just his kiss of gratitude, or whatever it had been that
day in the Craigmuir library. She wanted his hands on her. And she knew it was wrong.

“Do you want to go on that tour of Holyrood with Uncle tomorrow?” Meg asked as they prepared for bed.

“Of course,” she said, turning her mind to practical matters. “It’s one of the oldest abbeys in Scotland, built around the same
time as Craigmuir Castle, I believe.”

Meg laughed. “I know I needn’t have asked you. Joshua will probably be standing outside the carriage waiting for us an hour before it’s
time to leave.”

“Mmm.”

“Mmm? That is all you have to say?”

Lucy looked up at her sister, shrugging.

“I would have thought…” Meg frowned. “When Joshua’s sister convinced him to come to Edinburgh with us, Mama and I believed you
would be thrilled.”

“Thrilled that he had to be talked into coming?” Lucy said with a sigh. “For most of my life I’ve only wanted to be Joshua’s
wife.”

“And here he is. You have his attention now.”

“Now.”

Meg looked at her curiously. “Now? Yes, now. He missed you.”

Was that how it worked, Lucy mused. All she’d needed to do was go away for a few weeks and Joshua would realize what she meant to him?

That had not happened when she’d gone to London with her mother and sisters. Either time. Perhaps he’d still held out hope that Eleanor would
return home from Italy and fall into his arms after her unexpected breakup with Beckworth.

Was it wrong of Lucy to want to be her beau’s first choice? Would his attention be focused solely on Lucy when he kissed her? Or on the woman he
could not have?

Perhaps she was being unfair. Joshua was not some wayward youth who would pine away forever for an impossible prize. He was an affable, clear-headed
gentleman who would make an excellent husband. Lucy did not know why her heart and mind should be filled with such conflict over something she’d
yearned for since she was nine years old.

“I should write Mama tomorrow,” Meg said, “and tell her how well you seem. With Joshua.”

Lucy nodded.

“Perhaps I’ll wait until after our visit to Holyrood. I’m sure there will be a great deal to tell her about that.”

“No doubt,” Lucy said quietly.

“Uncle Archie says you quite fell in love with Craigmuir Castle,” Meg remarked as Lucy blew out the candle and they climbed into bed.

“I did.” Lucy was glad of the diverting subject, even though it brought to mind the one man she did not want to think about.

“Archie said it is of the Norman era, and quite spectacular.”

Lucy nodded. “A lot of it dates from then – the wall, the keep, the towers – but there have been many additions over the
centuries.”

“Did it feel like a…I don’t know…like a home?”

Of course it did. The realization that it hardly felt any different from Stillwater House stunned her. “Yes. I…I did feel quite at home
there.” She looked through the darkness at Meg. “It’s haunted, too.”

“No. Honestly?”

“Yes. And I even saw the ghost,” Lucy said.

“Tell me!”

She described Béatrice in detail but left out her experience in the library. That was Broxburn’s tale to tell if he ever wished to speak of it.

Meg spoke again, yawning. “I wish I could have seen it.”

They went to sleep then, waking the following morning after a night of late summer rain. There was a chill in the air, just like the kind Lucy used to feel
in Berkshire when autumn was coming.

“The air feels so much like home,” Lucy said to her sister.

“Excuse me?” Meg appeared dumbfounded. “It feels like home?”

“What?”

Meg looked puzzled. “We were all so certain you might actually expire when Father allowed Arden and Archie to drag you up here. And now…?”

“Oh. Well, I…” She supposed she
had
felt that way. “I was worried about Mama. And upset that I would not see Samuel and
Calvin when they came home.”

Meg laughed. “And then there was Joshua…”

Lucy replied with barely a nod.

They dressed and started down to breakfast, but Meg stopped her at the bottom of the stairs before going into the dining room. “Lucy, when
we’re at Holyrood, I’ll make sure to divert Uncle so that you and Joshua can be alone for a time.”

“What about Calvin?”

“Oh, I doubt Calvin will be joining us,” she remarked.

They went into the breakfast room where Calvin and Joshua mentioned the possibility of trying a round of golf after they returned home from Holyrood.
“I am looking forward to exploring the castle and abbey ruins, though,” Joshua said to Lucy. “Wouldn’t miss it.”

“Not I,” Calvin said. “I believe I will find a more invigorating diversion this morning. I do believe the whiskey distillery is calling
my name.”

Lucy looked at Meg, who smiled and winked.

As the carriage took them to the opposite end of the city, Lucy knew the visit to Holyrood Palace was the perfect distraction. She did need time alone with
Joshua to rekindle the feelings she’d always held for him.

“I think you will enjoy the palace, Lucy,” Archie said. “And now that the ground is drying nicely, we might take a turn around the abbey
afterwards.”

Lucy had made use of her uncle’s library and done some reading on the history of the palace. It was all so romantically intriguing – Queen
Mary’s tumultuous life in Scotland had been played out to a great extent in this palace.

Joshua smiled at her from the bench opposite, and Lucy felt a vague pull of the attraction she used to feel. She realized then that everything would be all
right.

They arrived and alighted from the carriage and went inside. A guide met them and walked them through the main floor. He pointed out items of interest
until they reached a grand staircase where a tall, familiar figure stood as though waiting for Lucy’s party to arrive.

“Lord Broxburn!” Meg said, her surprise equal to Lucy’s at the sight of the man who appeared all too frequently in her thoughts.

He stood at the foot of the stairs as though he belonged there, and Lucy’s heart tripped in her chest. Everyone greeted him, and their guide quickly
took control again. “This way, ladies and gentlemen. We will continue our tour upstairs.”

Joshua stayed by her side, and Lucy noticed Meg attempting to draw their uncle and Lord Broxburn away. But neither man was to be diverted from the group.
Lucy could not say whether she was pleased or annoyed, but she found it difficult to take her eyes off Broxburn.

They entered Queen Mary’s bedchamber, and Lucy felt a chill. So much had happened here and in the adjoining room, where Mary’s secretary had
been abducted and murdered by her husband.

“Lord Darnley had appeared to be the perfect husband when the queen married him,” the guide said. “But he turned out to be the worst
possible choice.”

Lucy knew the story of the queen’s womanizing husband, but seeing the place where his men had found the queen’s secretary and dragged him away
to kill him, made her tremble. The queen should have chosen more wisely, and not been swayed by Darnley’s polished manner.

How easy it was to make a mistake.

Lucy’s fresh beauty made Ian’s mouth go dry. She was lovely in a gown the color of a ripe peach, her eyes glittering with interest as she asked
questions of the guide.

Ian did not know why Kildrum had invited him to join them. Lucy was quite taken up with Parris, so she could not possibly be the reason. Much as he’d
hoped.

He saw her skin pale as they went into Queen Mary’s anteroom, the place where David Rizzio had been ambushed and taken out to be killed. Her hand
went to her throat as she listened to the guide’s recounting of the murderous events.

And then she looked at Joshua…frowning slightly.

Ian did not know why. They were an admirable couple, handsome and cultured. It was unlikely there were any skeletons in Joshua Parris’s wardrobe.

They continued exploring the palace, and when they were finished, Kildrum suggested they go out to the ruins of the abbey since it had turned so sunny and
pleasant.

The grounds were fairly crowded, likely because of the beautiful day – one of the last before the chill of autumn set in. Ladies with parasols walked
alongside their gentlemen escorts, moving between the ancient pillars that once had held up the sacred walls of the abbey. The building had been
constructed in the same era as Craigmuir Castle, but had been abandoned and left to go to ruin over the centuries. Ian’s ancestors might have
descended from a bastard line, but at least they’d kept their home intact.

Meg Stillwater took her uncle’s arm and then turned to Ian. “Lord Broxburn, you have been here before. Will you tell us about the abbey?”

It was plainly obvious that she was drawing him away from Lucy and Parris. And he allowed her to do so. As much as he would have liked a few minutes alone
with Lucy, there was no point. She was far better off with Parris, a man who would take her home to her beloved Berkshire and make her his wife.

Lucy and Parris walked at a fair distance behind him, and Ian tried to concentrate on the things he knew about the abbey while he tried to figure out why
he was still here. There was no reason to stay.

“Lucy told us about Craigmuir Castle, my lord,” Meg said. “She was quite taken with it.”

Aye, she had been impressed by the buildings. And Béatrice. Who wouldn’t be?

“She spoke of a building outside the castle walls – a huntsman’s cottage.”

Ian swallowed. It was impossible for him to think of the ghillie’s cottage without remembering the smoldering moments he’d shared there with
Lucy. She’d been so pliable in his arms, so responsive. But it was clear she belonged to Parris.

“She has an affinity for ancient things,” Meg said. “It’s almost as though she can hear the voices of those who lived in the
distant past.”

“Yes.”

As much as he wanted to glance back and look at her, he knew it would be the worst possible thing for his peace of mind. He did not need to see her with
her hand in the crook of Joshua Parris’s arm, or speaking with him in quiet, intimate tones.

When he felt as though he might explode, he decided he’d had enough. He believed he understood the point of Lord Kildrum’s invitation to join
them, but there was no ignoring reality. “Kildrum, I am afraid I must take my leave,” he said. “It has been pleasant, but…duty
calls.”

Not that there was much to do before the auction on Monday, but he knew it was best to separate himself from Lucy now. It was bad enough spending the past
couple of hours watching her with Parris. But no more.

Kildrum looked disappointed, but Ian could not fathom why. Their parting was awkward, but so had been the entire visit at Holyrood. He made a quick
farewell and strode away from the abbey ruins.

Lucy should have the life she wanted with the man she’d always loved. She would be close to her family and all her old friends, married to a man
whose lineage was pure.

Lucy and Meg sat together in their aunt’s garden embroidering. Arden had just been taken back to her room to rest and Joshua had gone with Calvin and
Archie to play golf.

“You are quiet this afternoon, Lucy,” Meg said.

“I suppose so.”

She’d been thinking about this morning at the palace. About standing arm in arm with Joshua and finding it not nearly as satisfying as it should have
been. What was wrong with her?

“Joshua seemed to enjoy Holyrood,” Meg said.

“He loves his antiquities.” Was it possible that he could love her, too, after all those years of devotion to Eleanor Easton? Lucy wondered if
he had truly gotten over her.

“Meg, do you think it’s possible to…”

Lucy paused long enough that Meg looked up from her embroidery hoop. “To what, Lucy?”

“Oh, nothing.”

She was beginning to think perhaps what she’d felt for Joshua all these years was not exactly love. She’d certainly cared for him and admired
him, but maybe what she’d always wanted was for Joshua to feel for her what he’d felt for Eleanor. Had her feelings been rooted in jealousy for
the love he felt for her friend?

“Joshua liked playing golf,” Meg said.

“Yes, I suppose so.”

They worked quietly together for a few minutes before Meg spoke again. “He said his sisters are after him to marry. I believe he would need very
little encouragement from you, Lucy.”

Lucy felt tears of frustration burning at the back of her eyes. Everything she’d always wanted was within reach, but she felt so unsure now.
“Yes, I know.” Lucy blinked away her tears and put down her embroidery. “Let’s get out of the house for awhile. We can take a
walk.”

“All right.”

She knew Meg was looking at her curiously, but she ignored it as they put on their hats and gloves and enlisted a footman named Evin to accompany them.

“Where shall we go?”

“Let’s just wander and see the sights,” Lucy said as Evin took his place several paces behind them to give them privacy but close enough
to assist if need be.

There were parks, gardens, and grand houses. The two sisters greeted other passersby as they walked, some of whom Lucy recognized from the events she had
attended with Archie.

“You seem quite happy to be here, Meg,” Lucy said as they walked toward a street full of shops.

“I am,” Meg replied, smiling. “I am with my favorite sister—”

“Oh, please,” Lucy said with a laugh. They had three other sisters, and each one was as beloved as the next.

“In a beautiful city where said sister will soon become the fiancée of the man she’s loved for years.”

“He means to propose?” Lucy asked.