Luathara - Book Three of the Otherworld Trilogy (42 page)

Do not lose control.  I understand your pain and anguish, but you will have your chance to prove your worth yet, I promise you that.  Do not give up the fight now.  You are stronger than that!

His silent words hit me like a slap, not because they were harsh, but because they mirrored the very words my own mother had spoken to me only a few hours ago.  Suddenly, I felt my magic
draw back
as my nerves
calmed.  At first I thought it was Cernunnos helping me along, but then I realized it was me.  He was right.  Danua was right.  I was stronger than this.  After living for
seven
teen years in the mortal world, oblivious to the life that waited for me in Eile, I had somehow overcome all my weaknesses and had proven myself capable of defeating every challenge thrown my way.  Yes, this current obstacle was bigger and far more terrifying than all the others put together, but really it was my own
terror
that acted as a barrier.  I could not let my emotions, my fear, rule me; I had to be practical
;
I had to figure out a way around this
difficulty
.

Cade distracted me from my internal pep-talk by pulling me close and stroking my hair.

“Hush,
Meghan
, hush,” he crooned softly into my ear
.  "Don't be upset."

Easier said than done
, I thought.  Then I gave myself a mental shake as
I absorbed
Cade's
comfort. 
Time to be strong Meghan, remember?
I reminded myself.

I gave
Cernunnos’s words
some more thought and as my tears dried up and the shaking stopped, I realized
his reminder had
reawakened my determination.  Fate was trying to steamroll me again, but I wouldn’t let it.  I felt helpless and frustrated and angry, but I would take those emotions, give them their chance to run their course, and then I would stiffen my spine and face this thing head on.  We were going to war, sooner probably than later, and we were going to drain the Cauldron of its power so that we had a better chance of winning.  Several people would die, and we would not be able to bring them back.  One of those people could be me, or Enorah, or Cade.  I would just have to accept that.  But I couldn't forget, I had that extra magic hidden away, and Cernunnos assured me I would get my chance to reveal it to help those I loved.  All I had to do was stay strong, trust that he was telling me the truth, and trust myself that I would know when it was time to let my magic free to enact its wrath upon the Morrigan.

As Cade rocked me gently, and as my mother and her fellow Tuatha De, the gods and goddesses of the Celts, continued their out of control argument, I breathed in deeply and told myself that I would, somehow and someway, defeat the M
orrigan and get my brother back.

-Twenty-

Conference

The Dagda left with his soldiers the next day in order to bring back the Cauldron.  The rest of us remained cooped up in the castle for
almost a week
as we waited for his return.  Outside
,
the sky
remained
slate gray and a mixture of ice and rain pelted the earth with vengeance.  My mother tried to lighten the mood by providing entertainment, but the board games and music only just took the edge off of our anxiety.

At sundown
on the fifth
day, and an hour before the Dagda's return, we received a message from the Morrigan in the form of the puca who had tried to entice me out into the open at Luathara.  Seeing the goat man once more made my skin crawl, but luckily I was in the room I shared with Cade when
the creature
arrived.  Despite the dismal weather outside, Cade opened the window so we could sit on the ledge and hear what it had to say.  Danua, unfortunately, had to stand in the massive doorway of her castle and listen to the monster's rattling voice up close and personal.

"Dawwwn tomorrooow.  My Missstresss requests a meeeting to discuss the terrrms of waaar."

"How can we trust her word?" my mother shouted over the patter of rain.

"Youuu have nooo choiiice.  Answeeer naaay to this requeeest and she shall attaaack toniiight.  Answeeer y
e
a
aa
and you will haaave a channnce to speaaak with herrr."

There was a long pause before my mother said, "Very well.  Tell your mistress we will meet her at dawn on the edge of her realm."

That night, the entire castle sought their beds early, but despite my weariness and Cade's warm presence, it took me several hours to finally fall asleep.

* * *

The sky had just begun to turn pale gray with dawn's approach as we left the grand courtyard of Erintara behind.  Despite the early hour, many of the city's residents had risen to give us their blessings.  Perhaps it was because the rain and sleet had stopped, even though the sky was still
dark
with more clouds building on the horizon.  Or maybe they just knew we needed their moral support.

Lasair walked silently beneath me, his thoughts, like mine, kept to himself.  All the other horses were also strangely quiet, as well as Meridian and Fergus.  My spirit guide sat on my shoulder, but for once
she
didn't have her head tucked under her wing.  She kept her sharp eyes trained forward, her mind as still as the frosty
air
.  Fergus kept pace with Speirling, his feet drifting quietly across the ground.  The only sound that met our ears that morning was the sharp clipping of hooves against cobblestone.  And then there was Cade, raging like a soundless storm beside me
, h
is intense silence
scraping at my nerves like a cheese grater.

I know you think this is too dangerous for me
, I sent
using
shil-sciar,
but I am more a part of this fight than most.

Cade growled, but I ignored him.

She can hardly do anything while I'm surrounded by Danua and her guard
, I insisted.

We had had this argument already, out loud, in our room upstairs earlier this morning.  I insisted on going with the Tuatha De to meet with the Morrigan, and Cade had forbidden it.  Blinking at him in surprise, I had burst out laughing, telling him he could
go ahead and
try
to forbid me, but he'd fail.  For o
nce I played the whole daughter-of-a-
queen card and reminded him
that
I was a princess and technically outranked him because my mother was the high queen. 
I
n the end i
t took the Dagda's intervention to first stop our fight an
d then get Cade to see reason.
  That had been a few hou
rs ago and I still felt like we'd resolved nothing.

We traveled east for a few miles, passing through a wooded area, the trees bare of their leaves as they waited for winter.  Not much conversation
took place
between the gods of the Celts and their soldiers, and I said nothing further to Cade.  He knew how I felt, and even though he didn't like my coming along with them, he understood why I needed to
be at this meeting with the Morrigan
.  Cade feared that this was just a
nother
trap to draw me out and capture me.  I couldn't deny
the thought hadn't crossed my mind
, but the need to learn
that
Aiden was unharmed drove me
despite my own nagging dread
.

Gradually, t
he trees thinned and the land descended into a seemingly
endless plain.  In the distance
I could just make out the white and violet tips of mountain peaks.

"The Morrigan's realm," the Dagda murmured, pulling his horse up
next
to Lasair.  "Th
ose mountains
are miles upon miles away, but luckily we have the dolmarehn
to bypass the distance
."

He nodded towards the massive stone structure that stood like a beacon
about a hundred yards away
.

I set my jaw and nudged Lasair forward as the small army continued
to crawl eastward
.  It took us
a few minutes
to reach the dolmarehn and I noted that it was even bigger than the one on the hill behind Luathara.  Cade tried to dissuade me once again, to turn me back, but I stubbornly shook my head and said to him,
This is my battle as well.  If I cannot fight to defend myself, then I hardly deserve to be Faelorehn.

Cade moved Speirling so that we faced one another.  He stretched out a gloved hand and gently
caressed
my face
, his own expression grim and forlorn
. 
I just don't want to lose you
Meghan
.

I reached up and touched the back of his hand with my own. 
But you would leave me behind and go fight without me?  So that I could wait in fear that you wouldn't return?  No Cade, we fight together, you and I. 
And t
his is just a meeting.  We won't be fighting today
.  I hoped.

Cade sighed and dropped his hand, curling it around my own.

"Besides," I whispered hoarsely as we stepped beneath the cold arbor of the dolmarehn, "she has my little brother."

* * *

Cold.  The first
sensation
I registered when we came out on the other side of the dolmarehn was cold.  And not just in the temperature sense of the word, though it was freezing, but in the down-to-the-depths-of-your-soul cold.  From the way the Tuatha De and their soldiers tensed on their horses, I could tell they felt it too.  I glanced at Cade.  He had hardly changed, though the
bleak
cut of his mouth seemed harsher.

Cade?
I asked him, reaching out with my mind.

I am used to it Meghan
, was his reply.

I settled back in the saddle, stretching out a hand to reassure Lasair.  He'd grown restless below me, just like all the other horses.

As we traveled across the rock-strewn, desolate land, I thought about Cade's response. 
I am used to it . . .

It didn't take me long to realized that the reason he was used to this awful place was because he had been here so often
; b
ecause his old geis had required it.  I turned my head and blinked up at him.  Oh, my poor Cade.  Without saying or sending a word to him, I reached out and
touch
ed
his forearm.  He
tens
ed a little, but his face softened when he saw that it was me.  I merely smiled, trying to put as much joy on my face as I could
.

We traveled in silence, my mother and her retinue, the Dagda, Nuadu, Lugh, Cernunnos and Epona in her horse form.  The clouds overhead continued to threaten
sleet
, and as we approached a rise in the dead land, I squinted my eyes to make out the dark band of earth that
rested on its crest
.  My stomach churned and my skin became even more chilled when I realized what
it really was.  Faelah.  Thousand
s upon
thousand
s of faelah.  And then the Morrigan came into view, along with another tall figure standing next to her.

Danua ordered us to spread out in a line to match the Morrigan's
formation
and I stuck close to her and Cade as the other Tuatha De and their men and women dispersed.

My mother
lifted
her hand for us to stop when we were a hundred yards away, then she motioned for Cade and I to join her.  As we closed the distance, gradually climbing the small incline, I gritted my teeth and forced my glamour to stay put.  It sensed my unease and knew my enemy was near.  Perhaps it had learned of her essence when it had driven her away last spring.  In any case, I had to work hard to keep it, and the magic Cernunnos had given me, under control.

When we were a couple dozen yards away, Danua slowed her horse to a stop and we followed suit.  Good.  I didn't want to get any closer to the Morrigan and the domineering man standing next to her.
  I took a moment to study him.  Other than being tall, his hair and beard were black, his eyes the same color.  He emanated an evil coldness that had my every instinct screaming at me to flee.

Before I could consider him any further, the Morrigan opened her mouth and said, loud enough for everyone to hear, "I called this parley in order to give you one more chance to hand over the girl and avoid war."

I blinked up at her, wondering
why she was even bothering with the pretense of striking a bargain.  The Morrigan I knew took what she wanted and never kept her word
.

"I would never volunteer one of my children over to you.  I've seen what you've done to your own," Danua retorted, jerking her head in Cade's direction, "and I know what you have planned for my daughter."