Authors: Jill Marie Landis
Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #Contemporary, #General, #Erotica
She placed her fingertips against his lips. “I need time, Jake. Time to adjust to being free. Time to learn to live with this newfound sense of freedom. It’s been a struggle finding the strength within myself to stand up to Anna and
you
made that happen when you opened up my heart and my world again.”
He tried to pull away, but she held him tight.
“I love you, Jake, but I need to live without the shadow of the past hanging over me. I need to call Wilt—maybe even go see him. Anna and I have things to work out, too. I need time to find out who
I
am, on my own, before I can make you any promises.”
She didn’t add that deep down she was afraid he was proposing out of a sense of obligation—perhaps to make up for the fact that he’d lied to her in the beginning. Maybe even because of his friendship with Rick.
As much as she needed time for herself, she wanted to give him time to step back, to change his mind if he needed to.
“How long?” he asked.
She wished she could tell him how much time she needed.
“I have no idea.”
“Promise you’ll let me know one way or the other. Don’t leave me hanging forever.”
As he brought his head down for another kiss, she doubted very much that a man like Jake Montgomery would wait for any woman forever.
47
LATE AUGUST HIT SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA WITH ALL THE drama of a scripted Hollywood disaster. There was the usual round of dry heat and brush fires that set the stage for winter flooding along concrete riverbeds and mud slides on bare, parched hillsides. A magnitude four earthquake shook up all the tourists, but no one else seemed to notice.
The streets and freeways were more crowded than Carly remembered, but she had no trouble negotiating them when she and Christopher drove to Long Beach for their first official visit to Anna’s.
Though Carly had intended to stay at a motel in nearby Surfside, Anna wouldn’t hear of it and insisted they stay with her.
The penthouse high above the bay was overwhelming in and of itself, but when Carly saw the room Anna had decorated for Chris, a room complete with photos of Rick at all ages, a collection of his favorite childhood picture books, some old toys and sailing trophies, she found herself touched—even though she realized that Anna might have put the room together back when she had planned to win guardianship of Christopher.
Early in the morning on the fifth day of their stay, Anna suggested they visit the nearby Aquarium of the Pacific while it was still cool outside and not as crowded as it would be later in the day. Chris was wild with the excitement of seeing all types of colorful and exotic sea life up close.
They entered the lobby of the cavernous building housing enormous two-story tanks filled with various sea life. Sound echoed as visitors streamed inside.
“Come on, Grandma Anna,” he cried, taking her by the hand and dragging her toward one of the winding staircases in the lobby. “The man just announced there’s a sea lion show starting up on the second level!”
Just then the cell phone that Jake had given Carly to use while she was on the road started ringing inside her straw bag. She smiled when she heard it, knowing it had to be Jake, because only he and Anna had the number.
“I’ll catch up to you,” she told Anna with a wave and found herself breathless as she pulled out the phone and flipped it open.
“Hello?”
“Miss me?” He sounded happy, confident, even though she’d not yet given him an answer to his proposal.
She smiled at the sound of his voice, walked over to where she could stand before a window displaying a tank full of salt water tropical fish.
“Who
is
this?” she teased.
“Very funny. You know damn well who this is.”
“How can I miss you yet? We’ve only been gone five days.”
“That’s four too many.”
“What are you doing? Are you at home?” She liked to picture him sitting on the wide porch of the old house slowly rocking in one of his new rockers.
“I was just going out for lunch.”
“Tell Selma hi for me.”
“I’m not going to the diner.”
“Oh.”
“Want to join me?”
“Sounds good, but I don’t think I could get there in time.”
“Look up, Carly.”
“What?” She craned her neck, stared up at the huge, life-sized whale sculpture hanging above the lobby.
“Not
that
far up. Look over at the window in front of the gift shop, just inside the entrance turnstiles.”
Her breath caught when she turned completely around and saw him standing there holding his cell phone to his ear. In a blue polo shirt and a pair of khaki cargo shorts, he stood head and shoulders above most of the tourists. A shaft of light from the overhead windows highlighted his dark hair.
When he waved and started toward her, her heart skipped a beat.
Flipping her phone shut, she dropped it into her bag and hurried to meet him, threading her way through a small huddle of students being herded through the lobby by a docent.
Unexpected joy welled up inside her and spilled over. She stood on tiptoe as he gave her a quick kiss hello.
“What are you doing in town? How did you know we were here?”
“I’m back because I have a court date tomorrow morning on a forgery case, and I tracked you down because I’m still a hell of a P.I.”
“Oh, really?”
“Actually, I called this morning, and Anna said you were in the shower. She told me you were all coming down here this morning, so I decided to surprise you. I’ve got time to see the aquarium and then have a quick bite with all of you.” He looked around. “Where are they?”
“Up on the second level watching the sea lions.”
“Great. Anna said that she wouldn’t mind sitting with Chris tonight. I’d like to take you out for dinner on my home turf.”
“You mean, as in a
real
date?”
“Yeah. Since I’ve already proposed, I figured I ought to take you out officially once.” He had been giving her all the space and time she’d asked for, so much that she found that she missed seeing him. If that was part of his strategy, it was working.
It wasn’t in her nature to play games. He wanted to take her out. She wanted to go.
“How can I say no?”
He’d chosen Lashers, one of his favorite Long Beach restaurants. Not because it was located in an old Craftsman bungalow on Broadway, but because they served a tender, juicy cut of prime rib and Yukon gold mashed potatoes.
Nervous as a kid on prom night, Jake wanted the evening to be perfect, and so far, so good. They were seated at a table for two in the corner near the window where they could look out over the small patio/garden area on the street. White twinkle lights showered the trees, giving the whole place a magical glow.
Carly looked stunning in a simple black summer sheath and low-heeled sandals, her cheeks aglow with color she’d picked up sunning and swimming on the beach. Her hair was streaked with sunshine, her lips so tempting not even mashed Yukons could take his mind off them.
The waiter cleared their plates at the end of the meal. Carly turned down dessert, and so did he, preferring to finish the last of the wine.
They spoke of friends in Twilight. He talked about how he had been looking into opening another branch of his firm in San Luis Obispo.
“From now on I don’t intend to do anything but background checks, handwriting analyses, and embezzlement investigations. Maybe I’ll try to prove an insurance scam now and again, but no more marital surveillance, no more domestic abuse or custody cases. No more cashing in on other peoples’ misery.”
Carly leaned forward. Candlelight played over her cheek-bones. “Is that what you meant by changing the focus of your work?”
“Exactly,” he said. “I don’t want to have to cope with the way I feel when I sit someone down and tell them exactly when and how their spouse has been cheating on them. I want to believe in the other fifty percent of marriages. Not only that, but I want to believe in all the things I used to believe in before life and my job stole them away.”
He reached across the table for her hands. Rubbing his thumb over her knuckles, he looked into the depths of her eyes and could tell she was searching his for sincerity.
He hoped he didn’t come up lacking.
“What do
you
want out of a marriage, Carly?”
She took a deep breath, looked thoughtful. “To be a part of something bigger than myself and yet have the freedom to be myself, too. I want someone who will accept Christopher as his son.”
To Marla, freedom meant the right to be with other men, but he knew exactly the kind of freedom Carly wanted and he was more than willing to guard her right to have it.
“You already know how I feel about Christopher,” he said.
“I do.”
“I’d never try to change you, Carly.”
“I know.”
“Although I
might
try to persuade you to quit working at the diner and concentrate on your career full time.” He pictured her in the Craftsman house, painting in the extra room downstairs, out on the deck, or the front porch. Anywhere her heart desired.
“That would be a dream come true.”
“I think you know what I’m offering you. A lifetime of love. Commitment. Friendship. I’d be a father to Christopher. You deserve happiness tied up with a great big bow, and that’s what I want to give you, if you’ll have me.”
They had just cleared the front steps at Lashers and were headed for the low gate in the white picket fence surrounding the restaurant when a shapely young woman walked up, opened the gate for them, and waited as they exited.
She was wearing a short, white knit sleeveless dress that fit like a second skin and accentuated her deep golden tan and coal black hair.
Carly couldn’t help but envy the woman’s stunning legs. They were sensuously shaped by weight training, not in the least masculine, but definitely worthy of a second look.
There was an attractive tilt to her almond-shaped eyes and an unexpected smattering of freckles across the bridge of her nose.
She gave Carly a quick once-over before she handed Jake a manila folder and asked, “Is this her?”
“Mind your manners, Kat.”
“So you’re Carly. I have to hand it to you. I never thought anyone would ever tie this guy up in knots, but you managed.”
“Thank you.” Carly smiled, trying not to let her amazement show. “I take it you’re Kat Vargas?” She extended her hand. Kat’s grip was firm, secure. The young woman never once looked away.
“Carly, this is my partner, Kat Vargas. Kat, Carly.”
“Thought I’d just drop off the file you’ll need for your court appointment in the morning,” Kat told Jake.
“Thanks. I could have picked it up when I got back to the office.”
“I thought you might be late, or maybe not in at all.” Again she eyed Carly carefully. “Jake, why don’t you go get your car? I’ll wait with Carly. That way we’ll have a moment alone, for some girl talk.”
“Do you think I’ve lost my mind?” He was smiling but completely serious about not leaving them.
“Most of the time, actually. Go.”
Curious about what Kat Vargas had to say, Carly encouraged him to leave. “Go ahead, Jake. I’ll wait here until you pull up to the corner.”
Once Jake was out of earshot, Kat wasted no time. The private investigator wasn’t at all the way Carly had pictured her.
“Listen,” Kat began, flipping her hair back over her shoulder, “I’ll make this short and sweet. That guy is crazy for you. I just wanted to let you know that if you hurt him, you’ll have to answer to me. Is that clear?”
“Perfectly, but you know something, Kat?”
“What?”
“I think Jake’s very capable of taking care of himself.”
Kat sniffed. “Not where you’re concerned. I think he had a thing for you before he ever laid eyes on you. Just make sure you don’t leave him dangling too long if the answer to his proposal is no. And give me a call if you turn him down so I can pick up the pieces.”
Before Carly could respond, Jake’s car rolled up to the curb. When she turned around, the young woman was already walking away.
Jake got out, came around and opened the car door for Carly.
“So that was your partner.” She watched Kat jaywalk across the street and head for a small, red SUV. Her hair bounced with every step.
“Yeah. Pain in the ass.” Jake put the car in drive and pulled away from the curb, heading down Broadway.
Carly could tell by his tone he was only kidding. It was easy to see that he thought the world of Kat Vargas.
“She’s
gorgeous
. You never told me she was gorgeous, Jake.”
“Is she?” His gaze flicked to the rearview mirror and back to the road ahead. “I never noticed.”
“You must be kidding.”
“I’m not. Besides, I know her too well. She’s like a kid sister or something.”
“I think she’s in love with you.” She’d never been jealous of anyone in her life, but she realized with a shock that if the streak of possessiveness rearing its ugly head was any indication, then she was jealous of Kat.
She had never loved anyone enough to be jealous before.
“Kat doesn’t love anybody.” Jake sounded offhanded but certain.
Carly very seriously doubted it.
They drove straight back to Anna’s, and Jake pulled up to the curb and parked. It was a little after ten-thirty. The temperature had dropped to a comfortable level, the air was scented with the sea. As they drove over the bridge at Second and Bayshore, Jake pointed out the phosphorescence caused by red tide glowing in the boat wakes.
Carly was touched that Jake had driven her back to Anna’s right after dinner—as if they really were on a first date—and yet she was disappointed that their evening together was already over.
Jake didn’t make any move to hurry and sat back, rested his arm on the driver’s side door, and appeared content to sit and look at her.
“When will you be going back to Twilight?” she asked.
“I hope my testimony will be over in a day, and I can head up before the weekend. Are you still planning to drive out to Borrego first?”
“We’re leaving day after tomorrow really early in the morning, so that we’ll be there before it’s too hot.”
It was over 115 degrees in the shade in the desert. Most of the shops and stores were either closed for the season, or they’d be closed all afternoon. She’d called Wilt’s old number, found him still there, still painting, and excited to see her and Chris.
“We’re only going to stay three days. If Wilt has any of my paintings left, I thought I’d take them back to Twilight with me.”
“Will you put them up for sale in the gallery?”
She shook her head, thought back to those years and all she’d learned experimenting with style and color. “No, I don’t think so. Some people keep journals. I have those paintings to remind me of the years I spent in the desert.”
The silence lengthened, full of words unspoken, Jake’s proposal almost a viable entity between them. More than anything, Carly wished she could give him an answer tonight, that she could, in all good conscience, say that she would marry him, but the two biggest decisions she’d ever made in her life had resulted in terrible consequences—she’d witnessed Caroline’s death and ended up running from the Saunders for years. Although Jake was convinced that he loved her, and she was certain that she loved him, she wanted to believe that if their love was true, it would still be there when she was ready to tell him yes.