Love Finds You in Hershey, Pennsylvania (16 page)

Lunch sort of went downhill after that. Kylie insisted on her ice cream and regaled Mac with tales of Tommy Fitzkee’s grandmother, even suggesting that Mac should date the old woman so they could find out whether Tommy had lied about the wooden leg.

Mac told her he didn’t think that would be a good idea. “It’s not polite to date a person just because you want to find things out about them,” he explained to Kylie.

Sadie bit her tongue when he said that and reached for her water glass.

“You should date a person because you find them interesting and because you’re starting to care about them,” he continued.

Kylie listened with rapt attention, and Sadie bitterly wondered whether she would have had the good sense to leave Dmitri Velichko alone if Mac had stuck around for more than five minutes while she was growing up.

After their meal was finished, Mac offered to drive them back home. Normally Sadie would have insisted on walking, but Kylie’s eyelids were sinking like rocks. Sadie knew that if Mac didn’t give them a lift, she’d be carrying Kylie the whole way.

By the time he pulled into the driveway, Kylie had already sagged against Sadie, her mouth turned upward in sweet, blissful sleep. Ah, the sleep of the young.

“Do you need help getting her inside?” Mac politely offered.

Sadie shook her head and expertly hoisted Kylie into her arms. “No thanks. I’m used to it.”

She sat in the truck a moment longer than necessary, staring at the front door of her house. Pastor Samuel’s words kept drumming inside her head.

What kind of God demands that we forgive our enemies? A God who forgives His. A God who forgives
us
.

Sadie blinked several times. What would her mother have done if Mac were here? An even better question occurred to her: why couldn’t Amelia have lived long enough to hear about Mac’s remorse?

Then again, maybe if she’d lived, Mac would never have felt regret.

What kind of love is that like?

“I didn’t mean it. About the Elvis song.” Sadie looked at him. “It was always one of my favorites too.”

Then she opened the door and stumbled out of the vehicle with Kylie before Mac could say anything in reply.

Sadie laid Kylie down for a nap, waited as long as she could bear it (which was about three and a half minutes), and then went to the phone and dialed Jasper’s number.

Brrriiing!

“Please pick up…”

Brrriiing!

“Please pick up…”

Brrriing!

“Oh, please—”

“Please what?”

She sank to the ground with relief.

“Pick up,” she answered, surprised at the thrill she felt at the sound of his voice.

“I did pick up,” he replied.

“I know—I meant, please pick up.”

He didn’t say anything.

“That’s why I was saying please, because I wanted you to pick up. I—oh, never mind.”

“No, wait, wait!” He sounded frantic. She wondered if he thought she planned to hang up on him.

“Are you still there?” he asked.

“Yeah, I’m here.”
Of course I’m here.

“Good.”

She sat on the floor with her legs tucked up tight to her chest. “How did your visit with Aunt Matilda go?”

“Enlightening as always,” he remarked. “She ordered a pack of Depends from the waitress at the restaurant.”

Sadie clapped her hand to her mouth and stifled a giggle. “She didn’t!”

“Oh yes, she did. And she insisted on leaving a tip that included two Rolaids coupons and a six-year-old prescription for hemorrhoid medication.”

Sadie burst out laughing.

“Sure, you can laugh,” Jasper reminded her, “because you weren’t there. But I think one day you’re going to be as senile as she is.”

“Mmm. And will you be so sweet as to take me out every other weekend like you do her?” she teased him.

“I’d take you out every other weekend right now, if you’d let me.”

The suggestion sobered her, but it left her curious too. “Sure. You would now, while I’m still young and attractive and have all my teeth.”

She could tell he was smiling when he answered, “Sadie, I’d take you out even if you were bald, toothless, and only had one leg.”

“Malibu Ken and I would be a matched set, then. Maybe you should try Tommy Fitzkee’s grandmother. Kylie has her number if you’re interested.”

“What?” He sounded thoroughly confused. Kylie must never have mentioned Mrs. Fitzkee to him.

“Never mind.”

There was a brief lull.

“So, how was your day?” he asked her.

“Not bad, I guess. I went to Dmitri’s this morning to apologize. He came to church with us.” She paused. “Mac came along to lunch.”

“To Suncatchers?” Jasper sounded surprised. Little wonder, after the way she’d railed on Mac’s presence all week.

“How’d that go?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” she softly replied. “Like old times but reversed. Like I was the one taking him out now, and I held all the power on who got to leave and who had to stay.”

A pause.

“How did that make you feel?” Jasper wondered.

Sadie thought about it for a long moment, her eyes tracing the patterns in the wallpaper: blue-and-white lines running parallel from floor to ceiling. Like her and Mac. Running parallel and never intersecting. Same direction, no common ground. “Sad,” she finally answered. “It made me feel really sad. Like I wanted him to have the control back, but I was scared about what he’d do with it if I gave it to him.”

“Maybe you’ll have to learn to trust him again.”

“He still hasn’t given me a lot of reason to do that.”

“Coming to Kylie’s birthday party was a start,” Jasper pointed out.

“That’s just the problem, though. What if he keeps coming around and gets her attached to him, and then he leaves her? Can you imagine that? Think about how attached she is to you. If you ever left us— if you ever left her—” There was a rising edge of hysteria to Sadie’s voice, and Jasper caught it.

“Sadie,” he stopped her, “I’m not leaving. I’m not going anywhere. Ever.”

“You don’t know that,” she whispered. “You don’t know. People leave. They leave all the time—whether they mean to or whether they don’t. They still go.”

Jasper didn’t say anything at first.

“Don’t be scared, Sadie. Remember the time you got stuck in the tree house?”

“Jasper, we were
nine
.”

“Remember?” he pushed. “You couldn’t see the steps to find your way back down. You were scared, and you started to panic. And remember what happened?”

Sadie felt the edges of anxiety begin to soften into something far more comfortable. “You talked me down. And you stood on the ground. In case I fell.”

“That’s right.” He sounded pleased that she’d remembered and outlined it so clearly. “I’ll always talk you down. I’ll always be there to catch you if you fall.”

“But what if…” She hated to suggest it, but it lingered in her mind nonetheless. “I used to hear Mac talking to my mom. Every time he’d come back, he’d say it was for good. That he wasn’t leaving. I believed him, the first six times I overheard him say it. And then I realized it was just something he said. That it was like this thing he couldn’t help. No matter what he said, he always ended up leaving.”

“I’m not Mac, Sadie.”

She knew that. But she couldn’t make herself believe it.

“Why did you kiss me?” she asked him.

“Why do
you
think I kissed you?”

“I don’t know; that’s why I’m asking.”

He answered more quickly than she thought he would. “I kissed you because I couldn’t imagine
not
kissing you anymore.” He paused.

“Why did you kiss me back?”

“
What?
I didn’t kiss you back.”

“You most certainly did.”

“I did not!

“You did.”

“You’re crazy.”

“Of course I am—I’m crazy for you.”

Sadie nearly dropped the phone. “Jasper Reeves, after all this time, are you saying that you’re—you’re… .well…are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Jasper!”

“Am I what?” he repeated.

“Are you…you know.”

“I am.”

“You’re not.”

“Oh, but I am.”

“But you can’t… Wait. You’re—what did you mean when you said ‘I am’?”

“Sadie, how many times are you going to do that?”

“Until you answer me.”

“I think you can answer yourself. I’ve gotta go now—things to do. I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

“Wait! Jasper! Tomorrow…” She felt like scum. “Dmitri asked me out to dinner tomorrow.” She winced. “I said yes. Can you—”

“No problem.”

She frowned. “Jasper, are you really—”

There was a click. Sadie stared at the phone. Had he hung up on her? Was he angry? And exactly what did he mean when he said he was…? He couldn’t be… But he said he was! But he never said what exactly.

Sadie felt a massive headache coming on.

Great.

Jasper thought it was time to have a talk with Kylie. They had each done their homework (him grading papers and her coloring a sheet of the alphabet) and eaten their after-school snack before retiring to Kylie’s bedroom to lay out the Barbie dolls. Jasper gently suggested taking a go at the Cook and Serve Playset Sadie had gotten for Kylie’s birthday, but the little girl only wrinkled her nose at the suggestion.

“That’s Mommy’s toy, not Kylie’s toy,” she informed him.

She seated herself on the floor, an assortment of Barbie’s wardrobe spread out around her. Jasper lifted a hot-pink cocktail dress and studied it for a moment before laying it back beside a leopard-print jumper.

Barbie had style, that was for sure.

He cleared his throat, and Kylie looked up at him.

“Kylie, there’s something I want to talk to you about.”

Kylie laid aside the brush she had been running through Barbie’s soft flaxen hair and stared up at him with sweet, innocent eyes. Jasper felt his insides tremble. She was five years old, and she could reduce him to putty with one heartfelt look from those wide brown eyes.

“You know how your mommy and Jasper have been friends for a long time?”

Kylie nodded, the somberness in his tone causing her to reflect an equally solemn demeanor.

“Years and years,” she affirmed, “even a’fore Kylie was born!”

Clearly, by her expression, this was an infinite length of time. Jasper smiled, though he still quaked slightly with nervousness. He considered putting this off for another day, but Sadie would be home in an hour or less to prepare for her date with Dmitri. He had to speak with Kylie before then.

He had practiced a speech of sorts, though it hardly seemed fitting for a five-year-old’s ears:
In the past week, I’ve come to the realization that I’m in love with your mother, and I’d like your permission to begin courting her.

No, no, no. All wrong.

Kylie blinked up at him, waiting with such uncharacteristically childlike patience that his heart melted.

“What would you think,” he finally asked softly, “if one day I would become your dad?”

Kylie looked puzzled. “Jasper
is
Kylie’s daddy.”

He blinked. “What?”

“Teacher said Daddy is the man who stays at the house and loves Kylie and Mommy and takes care of them.” She stared at him as if this were common knowledge. “Jasper
is
Kylie’s daddy.”

Jasper swallowed. “Oh. Well.” How in the world did he refute that kind of logic? “That’s true,” Jasper admitted. “Sort of. But…see… Mommy doesn’t
know
that. She thinks Jasper is just…a friend,” he finished lamely.

Kylie made a face. “Mommy’s silly. Jasper loves Mommy and Kylie!”

He smiled. “Yes, he does—I mean, I do. But now I need to make your mommy know just how much I love her.”

“That’s easy. Just tell her.”

If only Sadie still reasoned like her daughter did.

“I have, but Mommy is scared.”

This brought a whole new level of soberness to Kylie’s expression.

“Mommy’s scared?”

Jasper nodded and tried to think of a better way to explain it. “Mommy is afraid that I might hurt her feelings one day.”

Kylie shook her head. “Kylie hurts Mommy’s feelings sometimes, but she doesn’t mean to. Kylie always says she’s sorry.”