Love Charms (32 page)

Cinna
gets antsy inside of the litter box and scratches at the sides.  I shush her
and keep walking down the street.  Hurrying, feet scrambling faster than I
usually go, we move quick to the outskirts of town.  I hit a small hole in the
road and the cart bumps up.  Cinna meows, scared.

No
one is around me but someone ahead of me and to the side sees me.  They glance
at me, brows wrinkled, looking strange.

We're
all crazy, I think.  I know I walk the streets sometimes thinking I need to go
to the doctor's, even though I don't.  My doctor doesn't exist anymore, nor
does my manager.  I don't need to leave a note to explain that I have a
doctor's appointment next week, but sometimes I think it.  I forget; I don't
remember.

We're
all crazy and I meow.  I howl out some simulation of a cat in heat, mewing my
frustration at the world.  I meow and hiss and act aggrieved.

I'm
crazy and this is normal and the man who started looking at me funny accepts
this and turns away.  He goes back to being crazy in his own way, too.  I rush
out of town, run back to the safety of my woods.  Now I remember the way to the
house I've claimed as mine and Cinna and I go, cart and all, back to my home.

* * *

"Whoa,"
Desiree said.  "How'd you find this?"

"It's
hard to explain," Evan said.  "It'll be easier if I introduce you to
Sadie first."

"Sadie?"

"Yeah,
she's--"

"Oh. 
You found a survivor, I guess?  Is it safe here, though?  Is that... Evan, is that
why you've been acting so distant for awhile?  Um, are you guys dating?  I
mean, I guess that makes sense.  You wanted to come out here to see her,
right?  Sorry about before.  I was just kind of happy, even though I know we
were sort of acting.  I won't do anything around her, though.  I promise."

"Yeah,
um."  He didn't know how to explain this.  He needed to explain it, and
soon, because they were standing in the driveway of Sadie's home, but he didn't
know what to say. 

Also,
if he'd been acting distant for awhile (which he would admit was a
possibility), it couldn't have been because of Sadie.  He'd only just met her
yesterday.  He didn't think he was acting too distant, either, but maybe
Desiree saw it more.  Maybe she understood him more and so it seemed more
pronounced to her.

At
the end of the long, winding driveway he saw Sadie coming home.  She had what
looked like a shopping cart, pushing it in front of her, and... a dome?  A
litter box?

"Hey,"
he said.  "Desiree?  Wait here for a second, alright?  There she is."

Desiree
looked up, saw the girl with the grocery store shopping cart.  "What the
hell is she doing?"

"I
don't know.  Just wait here, alright?  I'll introduce you two, but please
don't... just please don't do anything.  Just listen to what I have to say
first, alright?"

He
hadn't told her about Sadie and her sickness.  He hadn't told her much of
anything except that he needed to go somewhere outside of the camp and he
needed a reason to leave.  He should have said something as they walked since
it took close to an hour to get here, but he didn't.  He didn't know what to
say and he didn't want to startle her and scare her off.

* * *

I
saw Evan at the end of my driveway before he jogged up to greet me.  He hurried
to me and I reached out for him, touching him, smiling at him.  As soon as I
did, as soon as we touched, I felt so nice.

He
hugged me and held me close, warming me up.  His hands roamed across my bare
arms and he nuzzled his cheek against mine.  I went to him, pressed against him,
wanted to feel him.

"Evan,"
I said.  "You're here."

He
smiled at me and kissed me on the forehead, leaving a light print of heat where
his lips pressed against my skin.  "Are you alright?" he asked. 
"I was worried, but you look fine.  You look nice, Sadie."

"I
found a kitten."

"What?"
he asked, scrunching up his face.

"I
found a kitten.  She's in there."  I pointed to the blocked off litter box
and Evan poked at the cat food bag and litter bag covering the entrance. 
"Careful!" I said, pulling his hand away.  "We need to get her
inside.  She was all alone, but I thought I could take her back here and then
she and I could be alone together."

Evan
smiled and kissed my nose.  "You aren't alone, Sadie."

He
joined me in pushing the shopping cart.  My left hand held the left side of the
pushbar while his right hand took the right, and our free hands pushed on the
middle, together and close.  We pushed the shopping cart down the driveway and
towards a beautiful girl with deep, brown hair and a pretty face.

"Who's
that?" I asked, freezing up.  I'd seen her standing near Evan before, but
it only just dawned on me that she was here and real.

"Sadie,
this is--"

"What
the fuck, Evan?  A zombie?  What are you doing?  Get away from her!  You're
going to get hurt!"

The
woman screamed at Evan and I shied away from her, pulling the shopping cart
back just a little bit.  Evan left me, his heat and warmth trickling away as he
rushed towards the angry woman.  I stood there, quiet and alone.  From inside
the litter box, Cinna scratched and mewed and pleaded with me to let her out.

"Desiree,
calm down.  Look.  This is her.  This is Sadie.  This is her house.  She's
fine.  There's nothing wrong with her.  She's sick but that's it.  She's not
going to hurt anyone."

Desiree
screamed and yelled something about Alex and the camp and how I was a danger to
everyone.  I understood what she meant and I somewhat agreed.  If I were
her--or even if I was Evan--I would be scared.  It was good to be scared
because the others
were
dangerous.  I'd seen them more than a few times
after they caught someone.  I remembered the sounds of screaming and the
sickening cracks and ripping sounds  I never looked, though.  I never saw
exactly what happened and I hoped I never would.

"Look,"
Evan said.  "She's not even dead, Desiree.  None of them are dead.  She
has a pulse."

"What
do you mean she's not dead?" the girl, Desiree, asked.  "I thought we
all knew they were."

"We
thought they were, or some people did because we wanted to, but they aren't.  I
don't know what it is, but their pulse--Sadie's pulse--is lower.  She's just
cold and that's why they look so pale.  I think... I mean, I don't know yet,
but I think that's a big part of it."

Desiree
calmed down for a second and peered at me over Evan's shoulder.  "So
you're studying her?" she asked.

"Yes,"
I said.  "Evan's helping me."  I thought it sounded best and I didn't
want to cause trouble for him.

"No,"
Evan said, voice firm.  "I asked Sadie if she'd go on a date with
me."

Desiree
stared at him, eyes blinking fast, lips parted and dry.  "Are you fucking
kidding me?"

"Evan,"
I said.  "You don't have to do this.  You shouldn't."

He
left Desiree and came to me.  Evan wrapped his arm around me and I leaned into
him instinctively.  Even above his shirt, his heat was so soft and desirable. 
I laid my cheek on the top of his chest by his shoulder and breathed in deep. 
I felt relaxed and nice, like I'd just taken a hot shower.

"I
met Sadie yesterday and I really like her," Evan said.  "I don't
expect you to understand exactly, Desiree, but... I thought I could trust you. 
We're friends, right?"

Desiree
glared at him, looking as if she wanted to spit something at him.  In the end,
she simply said, "It's a good thing she's got wine in that cart because
I'm going to need some."

"I
have mead, too," I offered.

Desiree
looked at me.  She hadn't looked at me before, not right at me, instead acting
like I didn't really exist.  "What's mead?"

"I
don't know," I said.  "It's supposed to be like wine, though.  It
looked nice."

Hidden
in my shopping cart, Cinna meowed.

"You
have a cat?" Desiree asked.  "You trapped a cat?  Are you going to
eat it?"  She stared at me, curious, waiting for my answer.

"Are
you seriously going to be like this?" Evan asked.

"Look,
Evan.  I'm the one who helped you come here in the first place.  Do you
remember that?  Pardon me for asking questions about the zombie girl."

He
tried to remain calm.  I knew he did, and he did a good job of looking calmer
than he felt, but with my head near his chest and his arm held tight around me,
I could feel his annoyance.  His grip tightened just a little bit and I saw his
jaw tense, clamping down.  I could hear his heart, too.  A gentle thump, but a
little faster now, quicker.

"Her
name is Cinna," I said.  "It's short for Cinnamon-Raisin.  I just
thought she'd be safer here.  I brought her food.  See?  I'm not going to eat
her.  I want to keep her safe."

"Sure,"
Desiree said.  She walked in a circle, fretting, then came up and reached for
the bottle of Riesling.  "This is the weirdest thing I've ever gone
through, I want you both to know that.  You're dating a zombie girl who's
decided to take care of a cat.  Your zombie has a pet cat.  Do you know how
weird this is, Evan?"

"It's
only weird because you're making it weird, Desiree," he said.  "Let's
get this stuff inside and then we can all sit down and talk, alright?"

Desiree
agreed.  I wanted to agree, too, to say something and confirm that everything
was fine and normal, but I knew it wasn't.  Desiree had some good points and I
didn't hate her for thinking them, nor saying them aloud.

Reluctant,
forcing myself to move away from Evan, I grabbed the bottles of mead and the
oatmeal packet.  I tried to grab more but Evan stopped me.

"It's
alright, Sadie," he said with a smile.  "I'll get the rest."  He
glanced at the litter box; Cinna was scratching faster now, meowing for
freedom.

"She's
scared," I said.  "Be careful."

"I'll
bring the whole cart inside, how about that?" he said.

Evan
took hold of the cart and pushed it forward.  To get to my front door he needed
to take a flight of stairs up a hill, but he couldn't with the cart.  Instead,
struggling alongside the stairs, shoving the cart up the hill but being careful
of my cat, he trudged forward.  Desiree stood nearby me, watching him, too.

"He'd
never do that for me," she said; to me, or herself, or no one.

"I'll
get the door," I said.

Evan's
heat was still with me, soft and warm.  I felt tingles on my cheeks and my
fingers and watching him help me, knowing he'd stood up for me, the warmth
seemed to linger longer.  I thought maybe that part was in my mind, but it was
a nice feeling still.

* * *

Inside
my house, everything settled down a little more.  Not quite, and I'd never had
real guests over (except for yesterday with Evan), but things seemed calmer. 
As soon as we closed the door and Evan moved the bags of cat supplies blocking
her way, Cinna hopped out of the litter box .  The little kitten stared at us,
stared at the cart, eyed the unopened food bag and cans of food, then swaggered
off to do her own thing.

Her
tail flitted back and forth as she walked away, like some fancy woman's dress
train.  "I hope she likes it here," I said.

Desiree
didn't care about the cat or me or anything.  "I thought all zombies
attacked people on sight?" she said.

"Can
you stop saying that word?" Evan said.  "They aren't zombies.  Sadie
isn't a zombie.  It's some kind of sickness, that's all.  There's nothing wrong
with any of them."

"Right,"
Desiree said.  "Whatever.  Alright, so these
sick people
... I
thought they attacked us on sight?  Haven't we heard the reports of them eating
anyone they catch?  What makes this girl so different?"

Evan
didn't answer.  I don't know if he knew the answer, either.  I wasn't sure if I
knew it, myself.

"They
do," I said softly.  "I haven't seen the others eat anyone, but I
know they do."

Desiree
nodded, agreeing with me.  "So then why aren't you trying to attack us? 
Besides the fact that Evan and I are stronger than you, of course.  And what's
with the full-blown conversations here?  Do you two have to act so cuddly, by
the way?"

Evan
had taken up a seat on the couch in the living room and invited me to sit next
to him when everything was settled with Cinna.  I did, gladly, but Desiree
never joined us.  There was a perfectly nice recliner nearby that she could
take for her own, but she stood in the open, adjoining dining room instead,
leaning against the dinner table.

"It's
the warmth, right?" Evan asked me.  "You can probably explain it
better than me."

"Yes,"
I said, nodding.  "I don't know for sure why the others attack people, but
I think it's because of the warmth.  I... when Evan is close to me and we
touch, I feel better.  It's nice and cozy."  I smiled at him and he kissed
my cheek.  "Whenever I'm not touching anyone else, I feel really lost and
confused, though.  Not right away, but after awhile.  I'm colder and it's hard
to think and move sometimes."