Lost (The Allure Chronicles Book 3) (10 page)

“You don’t actually care about how the drug works.”

“No. I want to know why I’m sad.” I tugged my hand away, and he let go.

“It’s sad someone like you would end up emotionless. You have such passion in you. It’s a waste. You would have been a much better Seer. It would have been a far better choice for someone like you.”

“Well, being turned into one supernatural creature was enough for my lifetime.”

“You’re going to have a very long lifetime.”

I didn’t want to think about my own endless life. “So are you.”

He chuckled. “Yes, aren’t you glad you know that?”

“I like to know things.” It made things simpler that way.

“I am starting to see that.” My manipulation trick seemed to have helped both of us. His eyes were closer to normal again.

“Do you wish you were immortal?” I watched for his answer. I wasn’t sure why I really cared, but I did. It was something other than numbness, so I grabbed hold of it.

“Every time one of my kind dies, which doesn’t happen often.” He looked off at some spot in the distance.

I turned to see if there was actually something behind me. There wasn’t, and I turned back to Sol. “I’d give you my immortality if I could.”

“Oh yeah? Feeling generous?” There was a teasing note in his voice. At least he wasn’t talking about making me take the drugged coffee.

“I’m not feeling anything.” I smiled, wondering if his choice of words had been intentional.

“Bad choice of words, although you feel some...”

“Not a lot.” Not nearly enough. Maybe once I was a full Allure I would stop missing my emotions, but I doubted it. Violet missed hers, and I remembered the Allure I met in the Glamour Realm. He’d been willing to do anything for one glimpse of a true memory with emotion. The lack of emotion was something one could never fully get used to.

“You are trying to protect him.” Sol took a seat on a barstool.

I sat down next to him, hoping this conversation would lead us somewhere. We’d been talking in circles, and it only made the numbness worse. “Yes.”

“Why?” He tapped his toe of his boot on the bar of the stool.

“Why does it matter?” I struggled to understand it, which meant it was nearly impossible to explain to someone else.

“Because I am trying to understand.”

“Why do you need to understand?” I shot back. He called my curiosity childlike, but I wouldn’t call his the same. There was nothing childlike about Sol. Although there was something surprisingly human. Not only was I able to manipulate him, but there was something else. I couldn’t put my finger on it.

“Because I want to.” His lips twisted into the hint of a smile. “Sound familiar?”

I nodded. “You can't always get what you want.”

“Good song.”

“But I wasn’t referring to the song.” I leaned my head back and stared up at the spinning ceiling fan.

“I was referring to it.”

I continued to watch the twirling blades.

“Is my fan more interesting than me?”

“No, but it’s less dangerous.”

“Again with the danger. I know you aren’t afraid.”

“How do you know that?” I looked forward at him. He had my attention.

“I just do. Are you sure this isn't on purpose?”

“Am I sure what isn’t on purpose?”

“This.” he waved his arm between us.

"No. Trust me. I'm not trying to create desire. I'm sick and tired of desire.” Just the mention of it made it seem stronger again. I shook my head and blinked a few times.

"Unless it's about him."

"Owen." I let his name roll of my tongue. Sol already knew the name. He was pretending he didn’t for some reason. A felt a surge of something other than numbness, and I held onto it with all my might.

“You don’t want to let go of him.”

“No.” Complete honesty came easier now. I had no fear of how someone would view me. It was freeing and one of the few positive side effects of my new existence. “But I don’t know why. I mean I know I loved him. I know he meant so much to me, and I’ve had glimpses of it, but then they fade out.” I thought of the graveyard. I wanted to get back to those moments.

“Which means you aren’t a full Allure yet.” Sol got up from his stool. “Which you keep telling me, and I get on some levels, but I wish I knew why. Something is holding the change back.”

“And once again I’ll return to our familiar question of why do you care?”

“I’m worried I might kill you.”

“Uh, why?” That wasn’t the answer I’d been expecting.

“Because I’ve never tried what I’m about to do on someone part human.” He moistened his lips.

“Maybe you shouldn’t do it then.” It would have helped if I knew what it was he needed to do. All he’d let on so far was it was going to be very painful, and he needed to get information from me. “I mean to be safe.”

“Your allure isn’t that good.”

“But you don’t want to kill me.” I could tell.

“What makes you say that?” His eyes were light.

“Because you’re not that kind of person.” And he was worried. It was clear on his face.

“I’m not a person in the way you are used to.”

“I’m used to non-humans. I still consider you a person. It’s easier.”

“Easier isn’t always right. We’ve already had that discussion.”

“For my sanity I consider all supernatural creatures people so I can still consider myself a person.” Otherwise what was I? My consciousness had no other way to view the world.

“You are still partially human.”

“But I have to assume that won’t last.”

“All right, enough distracting me.” He set aside his empty coffee.

“If this kills me it’s going to be on your conscience forever.”

“Who said I have a conscience?” His expression turned serious.

“Fine. Get it over with.”

“
D
ryad hunting
?” I wasn’t sure which word was more surprising. Dryad or hunting. The only Dryads I knew of were reasonably friendly and calm. They weren’t exactly the kind of creatures I’d have expected to go hunting for.

“Doesn’t he know?” Jonathan narrowed his eyes.

“I spared them the details. You know how kids are these days.” Jim shook his head

“How are kids these days?” Hailey asked with amusement. “I’m not sure I know.”

“Short attention spans.” Jim’s eyes twinkled. He understood his humor even if no one else did.

“Then why is he so willing to make the bargain?” Jonathan pressed.

“He wants the information the Dryads will have for us.” Jim stepped toward him. “It involves a girl.”

“Ok.” Jonathan nodded in understanding. “Good enough for me. “

“Great.” Hailey led the way toward the back door.

Amber was standing in front of the door, leaning back against it. “Leaving already?”

“Yes. We found what he came for.” Jim patted Jonathan’s arm.

“Did you find my brother?” Amber asked Hailey as we walked toward her.

“Uh, no…” Hailey trailed off. “I’ll have to catch him next time.”

“He’s staring at you right now.” Amber nodded behind us.

“Yeah, we’ve got to go.” Impressively Hailey didn’t turn around.

I did turn around, and I found a guy who looked nothing like any Jackal I’d ever seen. He was easily six foot tall. Most Jackals were less than 5’5, and as Amber had described, he was staring right at Hailey. “We need to go.”

“Miss?” the guy called out. The guy didn’t sound like any Jackal I’d met either. No one in our world called anyone ‘miss’.

Hailey turned around with an amused expression.

“Are you really leaving already?” He watched her with a forlorn look.

“Yeah, we’re headed out.” She pointed toward the door.

“I was working up the nerve to come over, but I didn’t get much time.” He shoved his hands in his back pockets.

“Oh, yeah, well. Sorry about that.” Hailey shrugged and turned around.

“Could I get another chance then?” He called to her back. “Dinner maybe?”

Hailey ran her teeth over her bottom lip before turning around again. “Probably not, but thanks.”

“Seriously?” His mouth fell open.

“Yeah… I’m not interested, but you know it’s flattering.” Hailey shifted her weight from foot to foot.

“You already know you’re not interested before we even get a chance to talk?”

“Yeah… sorry.” Hailey crossed her arms.

“Why?” The Jackal pressed.

“Willy, she said no.” Amber used a warning tone.

“But she’s being rude.” He glared at his sister.

Jim was in Willy’s face in a second. “Did you just call my niece rude?”

“Yes.” Willy glared at Jim.

“Apologize. No one is going to talk to her that way. She isn’t interested. She made her feelings clear. End of story.”

“But she made her decision without giving me a chance.” Willy tried to step around Jim.

“Does that matter?” Jim blocked him in his path. “She’s given her answer.”

I had to hold myself back. I was used to jumping in to defend my sister, but she could take care of it herself.

Hailey pushed Jim out of the way. “I can handle this.” Hailey turned to Willy and held a hand out in front of her. “I don’t want to go on a date with you. Got it?”

Willy frowned. “Is there a reason why you’re so rude?”

Hailey chortled. “You haven’t seen rude yet.”

Willy made a move toward her, and Hailey stepped back. “Take one step closer to me and you’ll be sorry.”

“Why will I be sorry?” He stepped closer.

In a blur she knocked him through the air and pushed her black boot into his chest, pinning him to the ground. “Were you saying something?”

I laughed. That was Hailey for you.

“I didn’t think so.” She released him and yanked open the door while Amber stared at her with her mouth hanging open. I followed right behind her.

“Your dad taught you well,” Jim caught up with Hailey outside.

“I taught myself well. My dad would have preferred if I spent my life in a little glass bottle.” Hailey sighed.

“He’s that protective?” Jim asked.

“Yes.” Hailey tied her long red hair up in a messy bun with the hair tie she always seemed to have around her wrist. “It’s ridiculous. Owen gets to do everything.”

“But he’s letting you do this,” Jim said as if to himself.

“He kind of had to.” Hailey waited beside Jim’s car.

“He trusts you, he’s just protective.” I joined her by the car. “He means well.”

“At least your brother isn’t overly protective,” Jonathan added.

I’d nearly forgotten he was with us. “I’m protective, but I’ve learned to temper it.”

Hailey laughed. “You mean hide it?”

“I’m not that bad. I let you have your own fight back there.”

“Because you had to. You’re protective behind my back.”

“I am. But that’s natural.” She would always be my little sister no matter how old she got. She was tough, and she could take on nearly any opponent in a fight, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t worry about her.

Jim unlocked the car and got into the driver’s seat.

I got into the back seat this time. I wasn’t leaving Hailey to sit in the back with Jonathan. She gave me a little smile before she slipped into the passenger seat. She’d proven her point. I was being protective.

“Who was that guy?” I’d never met a Jackal that aggressive before. Generally they were the calm and collected one in a room full of shifters. Stereotypes are often wrong, but he was the exact opposite of what I’d have expected.

“Willy is a piece of work, but Hailey put him in his place.” Jim started the car and slowly backed out of the alley.

“And he’s really a Jackal? Nothing else mixed in?” I still couldn’t quite believe it.

“There’s always something else mixed in,” Jonathan pulled out a pack of gum and put a piece in his mouth. He held out the pack to me.

I shook my head to say no thanks. “What about you? Do you have things mixed in?” Jim hadn’t told us what Jonathan was yet, and I hadn’t picked up on any recognizable traits yet that gave him away.

“I’m a mutt.” He put the pack of gum back in his pocket.

“A mutt consisting of what?” I liked to know who, or often more importantly what, I was dealing with.

“Many things.” He smiled.

“You don’t even want to go down that line of questioning.” Jim pulled to a stop at a traffic light. “It will take you hours.”

“We don’t have hours.” We had no time as far as I was concerned. I wanted to find Daisy, and I wanted to find her immediately. I refused to give up hope.

Jim drove back in the direction of his house. He caught Jonathan’s eye in the rearview mirror. “You think they’ll be willing to help?”

“The Dryads?” Jonathan stretched out his legs in the small space in front of him. “Sure. You have plenty to give them.”

“I hope they know who’s behind the rosimo.” Jim turned onto a smaller road and headed away from the city.

“If they don’t know, they will be able to point us in the direction of someone who does. They make it a point to stay aware of what’s being grown.” Jonathan watched out the window.

“I thought you were confident.” I leaned forward toward the front.

“I am.”

“Then why are you asking Jonathan for reassurance?”

“Because you can never have too much reassurance.” Jim slowed down as the road narrowed.

“If you say so.” I could barely sit still as we made the drive back to his house. I itched to get moving, even if I wasn’t entirely sure where we were moving toward. I looked out the window and wondered where Daisy was. Did she feel anything anymore? Did she remember me? I wasn’t sure how things worked as an Allure. Did memories disappear, or did they dull? I hoped she was safe, but safe was a relative term.

I closed my eyes and pictured her in the only way I was willing to. Her big brown eyes were full of light and excitement that matched the smile on her face. I refused to imagine her as an Allure, because it couldn’t happen. I wasn’t giving up on her. I opened my eyes.

Hailey turned toward the back. “You holding up back there?”

“Yeah. I’m fine.” I shook my thoughts of Daisy away. I had to stay focused.

Hailey patted my leg. “We’re going to get her back for you.”

“I know.”

We fell back into silence until Jim pulled back into his driveway. I still didn’t quite understand why we’d picked up Jonathan only to come back to Jim’s house, but I assumed there had to be a reason.

I didn’t voice my concerns as we all filed out of the car.

“You painted.” Jonathan pointed to the house.

Jim shook his head. “No I haven’t.”

“It looks different than the last time I saw it.” Jonathan took a step toward the front of Jim’s unique house.

“You haven’t seen it in years. Your memory isn’t as good as it used to be.”

“Are you calling me old?” Jonathan raised an eyebrow.

“You decide.” Jim walked around to a gate on the side of the house. He opened it and led the way through his backyard toward the woods. Jonathan followed closely behind, and Hailey and I kept a small distance behind them.

Hailey caught up with Jim. “All right, I have to ask you something.”

“Yes?” Jim slowed down and let Jonathan continue on ahead.

“Why do we need Jonathan?” she whispered.

“What do you mean?”

“We’re back behind your house. Couldn’t we have saved a lot of time by coming back here ourselves?” She voiced the very same question I had.

Jim didn’t respond at first. He appeared to be mulling it over before he finally answered. “Yes and no.”

“Uh?” Hailey and I exchanged looks.

“Jonathan has a knack for finding Dryad hideouts.”

“But you said we needed him for information.” Those had been his exact words.

“We do. Information on how to find these creatures.”

“I’m lost.”

“Jonathan has a gift for finding their tracks. They are known to be quite clever at covering up their paths, and it might have taken me days to find them on my own.”

“Ok, so we do need him.” Hailey nodded.

“Like I said, yes and no. No we didn’t need him to find them, but yes we needed him to find them in a timely fashion.”

“We need him then.” Wasting time wasn’t an option.

We followed Jim and Jonathan as we walked deeper into the woods. There was no path so to speak, but the ground was worn where we walked. I assumed it wasn’t Jim’s first time walking this direction in the woods. Jonathan seemed to know the route as well.

If I hadn’t been worried sick about Daisy, I might have been able to enjoy the natural beauty of the woods. The old growth trees were thick, and the only sounds were our feet and a few birds singing. None of us said anything, which made the journey seem that much more intense.

We continued through the forest, stopping every so often when Jonathan would point out a spot and Jim would fall to his knees and dig through the dirt. Neither Hailey nor I said anything at first, but eventually Hailey broke the silence. “Are you sure we’re going to find Dryads back here?”

“Doubting us already?” Jim stood up from his most recently stopping spot.

“Not doubting as much as questioning.”

“What’s the difference?” Jim brushed dirt off the knees of his khaki pants.

“I’m not entirely sure,” Hailey admitted.

I laughed silently.

“I can tell you the difference.” Jim brushed off his hands.

“I’m all ears.” Hailey tilted her head to the side.

“Doubting is negative. It means you’ve lost faith. But questioning is altogether different. It means you’re thinking through the situation and making sure you agree with the steps being taken. Questioning is the sign of genus.”

I laughed out loud this time. I couldn’t help it.

Hailey glared. “Well then, it’s a good thing I was questioning then.”

Jim grinned before continuing on through the forest.

Jim and Jonathan repeated the same process over and over. After each stop, Jim returned to his feet and continued walking as though nothing had happened. Hailey and I exchanged looks each time but continued to follow them.

We’d already stopped a half dozen times before we reached a fallen tree stump. “There. This is it.” Jonathan had made the claim many times already, so we weren’t expecting much when Jim fell to his knees next to the stump.

We waited as patiently as we could, but we were definitely doing more doubting.

“This is it!” Jim pounded on the stump. “We’re in business.”

“This is what exactly?” I peered down at what appeared to be a completely mundane tree trunk.

“The North Dryads have been here.” Jonathan kneeled down beside Jim. “I knew we’d find them eventually.”

“The North Dryads?” I asked. “I met Dryads in the Glamour Realm with the Allures, but I have no clue if they were the North kind.”

“You’ve been in the Glamour Realm?” Jim’s eyes widened. I was pretty sure I’d been living his fantasies.

“Yes, but it wasn’t under the best circumstances.” I thought back on our time there. We’d been so hopeful that Violet knew how to help us, but she only led us to the Elders. And the Elders took away everything.

“Who is this kid?” Jonathan pointed a thumb at me. “I mean you say he’s your nephew but hanging out in the glamour realm?”

Jim beamed. “My family is full of surprises.”

“Are you okay?” Jim wrinkled his brow.

“Yes, sorry. Just thinking.” Thinking back on my last hours with Daisy was dangerous. It sent me to a very dark place.

“These Dryads are friendly. I assure you.” Jim misread my apprehension.

“I don’t doubt that. The name brought back some bad memories.”

“Can’t be worse than your current situation.” Jim patted my arm.

Hailey snorted.

“What?” Jim asked her.

“Was that your attempt to comfort him? Telling him nothing could be worse than his current situation?”

“I wasn’t trying to comfort him.” Jim set his pack down on the ground beside him. “I was trying to keep him on track. That’s something completely different.”