Lost in Her (26 page)

“Charlene,” he said as he began to move. “You feel so good.”

“And you feel . . . impressive.” She giggled.

“And you think that’s funny? I’ll show you impressive, then dare laugh.”

With great effort and control, Ryan made love to his girlfriend slow and easy. If that one night was all they had, then she would damn well remember it and him. He made her come three times before he couldn’t hold back any longer, and when he let go, he came so hard and long that white spots danced in front of his eyes.

“I think I’m permanently cross-eyed,” he said when he could talk again. She didn’t laugh, didn’t say anything, just held him tightly to her. He pretended not to notice her tears dampening his skin.

Throughout the night, they alternated between sleep and making love, sometimes hard and fast, sometimes in the slow haze of a half-asleep state. Each time, he felt her tears afterward. She was breaking his heart.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

T
he cup of coffee sat untouched in front of her. After she had changed her afternoon flight home to a morning one, Ryan had insisted on waiting with her until it was time to go to her departure gate. His coffee was untouched, too.

Charlie wished he would leave.

If he would go away, she wouldn’t be able to smell him. She wouldn’t have the desire to reach up and feel the bristle of his unshaven face against her palm. She wouldn’t keep thinking about how dangerous and sexy he looked with a day-old beard. He reached over and trailed the back of his knuckles down her cheek. She wished he wouldn’t do that, she thought, as she closed her eyes against the burn in them.

“I’ll be back in time for your air show,” he said.

Charlie shook her head. “No, stay here with your parents. You said you haven’t seen them in a year, and they’d be disappointed if you left so soon.”

“I’ll call you every day then.”

Again, she shook her head. “Please don’t. Don’t call me, don’t come to see me.”

“Ever?”

There was anger in his voice, but she didn’t care. “Not unless you can look me in the eyes and say you’ve forgiven not only your brother, but your wife, too. You once promised you would never lie to me. If the day comes when you can do what I need, then come to me, and I’ll believe you.”

He stared hard at his coffee cup as he twirled it in a circle. Then he turned his uniquely colored eyes on her, the orange in them flaring like a lit match. “No, I’ll never lie to you, Charlene.” He stood and stuck his hands halfway into his pockets. “The barbarian inside me wants to throw you over my shoulder and carry you to my lair, no matter how you feel about it.” He leaned down and kissed her hard, then he walked away without looking back.

Tears streaming down her face, Charlie watched him until he disappeared against the crowd of people hurrying to their gate. When she could no longer see him, she swiped at her eyes, then, towing her carry-on behind her, got in the security line.

After dropping her things off at her apartment, Charlie went straight to Emerald Coast Aviation, made a preflight check, oversaw the fueling of her plane, then took to the air, the one place she could put Ryan out of her mind.

For the air show, she would start with an inverted flight, simply flying low and upside down past the grandstand. The stunt started from a wingover, putting her in the upside-down position, then she accelerated to cruise speed, keeping the plane’s nose elevated higher than the tail.

She went through each aerobatic maneuver she had planned without once thinking of Hot Guy, something she marveled at when the plane’s wheels were back on the ground. The moment she rolled to a stop, there he was, back in her mind. Maybe she should just take to the air twenty-four seven.

After she landed and had climbed out of her plane, she turned her phone back on. Four beeps, one after the other, sounded, signaling messages. Ignoring them for the moment, she made sure her plane was towed back into the hangar. Waving good-bye to the girl behind the counter, Charlie clicked on her messages as she walked to her car.

The first was from Maria, and Charlie hit Call Back. “It’s Charlie,” she said when her friend answered.

“Where are you?”

“Here. Pensacola.” She got in her car and turned on the ignition long enough to roll down her windows.

“Oh, I thought you’d still be in Boston.”

Charlie didn’t want to talk about Boston or the man she’d left there. “Nope. I’m back.”

“Right. Subject off-limits.”

“For today, anyway. How’s Mr. Bunny doing?” She even missed his rabbit.

“Having a ball playing with Mouse. You gonna come get him?”

“If you want me to, but I moved back to my place.”

“He’s fine with me if that works better for you.”

“Yeah, I think it’s best.” She didn’t want to give Ryan any reason to come see her unless it was to tell her he’d done what she had asked.

“No problem. The reason I called is we picked up three sets of fingerprints that weren’t yours. One was Ryan’s, and since you said he was in your apartment with you, that was expected. Of the two others, one we got a hit on and the other we didn’t. The one we can’t identify is possibly a woman’s. I can’t tell you that for sure, but some studies indicate that women tend to have a somewhat higher ridge density than men. Nothing conclusive, so best guess it was a woman. The third one belonged to Aaron Gardner.”

“My ex,” she said.

“How long’s it been since he was in your apartment?”

“Over a year. Wouldn’t his prints be gone by now?”

“Not necessarily. Unfortunately, there’s no way to know how old they are. As for the one that might be a female’s—”

“There’s been no female in my place other than you and me. Well, except for whomever those belong to.” It was embarrassing to admit she didn’t have any female friends. She needed to get out more. Make some friends.

“And we can’t say for sure those are female prints.”

Charlie sighed. She didn’t need this crap, wondering who had been in her home, nosing through her stuff. “So I don’t know any more than I did before?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault. I really appreciate everything you’ve done.” And she did. After years of being alone other than the short time she’d let Aaron into her life, it was nice to have friends who cared about her. More than nice.

“I wish we could point to someone with certainty. I don’t like that someone’s been in your apartment without you knowing. Just don’t let your guard down, okay?”

After promising she’d stay alert, Charlie ended the call, then checked her next message. It was from David, wanting to make sure she would be back at the flight school on Monday as promised. She called him, got his voice mail, and assured him that she would be there. After spending the money on her plane ticket to Boston, she should go back to work immediately, but she just wasn’t up to it.

The third message was a text from Ryan. Even as she told herself not to open it, her finger did just that.

I can still smell you on my skin.

You’re killing me, Hot Guy.
She saved the text. When she’d told him not to call or come see her, it hadn’t occurred to her to tell him not to text her either, so in all fairness, he wasn’t breaking the rules. God, she missed him.

Should she answer? No, she wouldn’t make it easy on him. But he was thinking about her, and that had to count for something. Before she changed her mind and answered him, she hurried on to the last message.

As soon as she heard the voice, she almost clicked off. Why was Aaron calling her? When the message ended, she frowned. For what
reason would he want to see her? They had nothing to say to each other, the lying, cheating bastard. She still hadn’t gotten over the shock of him
being married, and she was almost tempted to call him back and tell him what she thought of him. But she didn’t really care anymore, and the realization was freeing. She didn’t care about him one way or the other. Deleting his message, she started her car and turned for home.

For dinner, Charlie opened a can of vegetable soup. She supposed she’d be eating a lot of canned soup for a while until she replenished her bank account. The oyster crackers she liked to have with soup had just become an extravagance, so she limited herself to five.

“Pitiful,” she muttered. As she ate, she tried to decide if the cost of the ticket to Boston had been worth it. Who was she kidding? She’d do it again without a thought. The night with Ryan had been magical, and if there was never a repeat—no, she wouldn’t cry—she had a dang good memory.

She cried.

No longer hungry, she put the remainder of her dinner in a plastic bowl and the three uneaten crackers back in the bag. Although she told herself not to do it, she got her phone and pulled up Ryan’s text. She was staring at it, lecturing herself not to respond, when there was a knock at the door. The only person she could think of who might stop by was Maria.

She went to the living room and put her eye up to the peephole. Really? “I’m not home,” she said.

“Please, Charlie. Open the door.”

“Go away, Aaron. We have nothing to talk about.”

“I miss you, baby.”

A rage burned through her, and she unhooked the chain. So angry when she opened the door, she pushed him back. “You don’t have the right to miss me, jackass. Go home to your wife.” When his mouth opened and closed, reminding her of a blowfish, she pushed him again. “Yes, your wife, who you neglected to mention. Or that you had a kid, who I feel really sorry for, by the way, for having a loser father like you.” The lock of blond hair that she’d once adored fell over his forehead. Instead of wanting to brush it back like she used to, she wanted to pull it out by the roots.

“I can explain.”

Just like that, her fury fizzled out. He wasn’t worth her anger, wasn’t worth a miniscule thought in her head. “There’s nothing you can say that I care to hear, Aaron. Go away.”

She turned to go back in her apartment, and he grabbed her arm. “Come on, runt, just listen, okay? Five minutes is all I ask.”

Calling her
runt
wasn’t winning him any points. “Five minutes is five minutes too long.” She jerked her arm away.

His brown eyes flashed with anger. “You always were a bitch, Charlie. Always thought you were such a hotshot pilot. You’ll be sorry—”

“I’m sorry all right. Sorry I ever met you.”

“You’re gonna wish you’d listened to me.” With that, he turned and strode away, shooting her a bird over his shoulder.

“Screw you, too, asshole.”

Why should she listen to anything he had to say? As she closed and locked the door, unease slithered down her back. In her anger, she’d not given a thought to him being on her suspect list. Maybe she should have heard him out.

Parked in the driveway of his parents’ house, Ryan slipped his cell phone back into his pocket after texting Charlie. He probably shouldn’t have sent it, but she hadn’t included “no texting” in her list of don’ts. And dammit, he could still smell her on his skin, and it was driving him crazy.

As he walked up the sidewalk, his dad stepped out. “Ah, there’s my car.”