Look Always Forward (Bellingwood Book 11) (13 page)

"He and I agreed that this could end within the month. If it's over the first week, I guess that's it," Jeff said.

Polly sighed. "Grey's a good guy. I don't want to throw him away, but I don't have any experience with alcoholism."

"You won't be able to talk to him tonight," Jeff said. "He'll say anything when he's drunk. The conversation needs to happen tomorrow, when he's sober."

"Will he even remember that I was here tonight? Will he admit that there's a problem?"

"I don't know that either," he said. "You need to tell me how far you want to go to be part of his life."

"He's worth it," Polly said.

"You've known him less than a week."

"He's worth it," she said, this time more firmly. "I'm confident. I have the same feeling about him that I did with Eliseo and with Sylvie. Whatever has brought him to this point needs to be put behind him. From here on out, he needs to know that we're part of his life."

"Are you sure?"

"No," she said weakly. "But I'm almost sure."

"Then I'll wake him up bright and early tomorrow morning and we'll see what he says. Do you want to be there?"

"Unless you want me there, I'll let you take care of it," Polly said. "He said that nights were his worst time. If he can't deal with being alone at night, we'll have to work something else out, though."

"I'll talk to him. And you and Henry can get him home tonight?"

"Yeah. We can do that," she said with a laugh. "My hero helps me take care of everybody."

"Now, there's a good guy."

"Thanks Jeff. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Don't worry. We'll deal with this," he said.

"Thanks." Polly ended the call and sat at the table, watching her husband and friends with Grey. Joss and Nate were working to keep up the conversation and Henry kept looking her way, worry in his eyes. She gave him a weak smile. He trusted her no matter what. Even in the midst of things like this, he stood beside her. Polly's eyes burned with tears. She was so lucky. He'd argue with her later tonight about keeping Grey on at Sycamore Inn, but he'd also listen and in the end, trust her with whatever decision she and Jeff made.

The moment she stood up, Henry stood and took a chair from the empty table next to theirs.

"We ordered another hamburger for you," he said. "Here, have a bite of mine."

"I apologize profusely for my behavior," Alistair said, attempting to stand up.

Polly put her hand on his shoulder, telling him to stay seated. "We'll deal with that tomorrow," she said. "Tonight let's finish dinner and get you safely home."

She sat down between Grey and Henry just as the waiter slid another plate in front of her. Polly looked up at him and smiled a thank you, then handed him the Bloody Mary and asked for a glass of water. Henry had made sure that Grey had water and that it was kept full.

"You've met our friends, Joss and Nate?" she said.

"A purveyor of healing balms," he replied. "Do you know that the inventor of Pepsi-Cola was a pharmacist? And so was the man who first made Dr Pepper. They originally were thought to help with digestion or even to give people pep." He looked at the water in front of him. "Soda pop might have been a better choice for me this evening. I apologize," he said to Polly.

Nate spoke up. "There have been many famous people who were apothecaries in their time. Even Dante was educated as a pharmacist so that he could become a politician."

Polly chuckled and took another bite of her hamburger.

"What are you laughing at?" Nate asked.

"You never cease to amaze me," she said.

"Why?"

"Tonight I've learned about paladins and chivalry and now I've learned about Pepsi, Dr Pepper and Dante. It's never boring with you, is it?" She looked at Joss.

"Never boring," Joss said. "I have no idea where he gets all of this information, but I do know that whatever he learns, he never loses."

"A wonderful trait, to be sure," Grey commented. He pushed his plate back an inch. "I can find my own way home."

Polly stopped him. "No, please. Let us take you home this evening. Sit with us for just a little longer. Joss? Nate? Is that okay?"

"It's fine," Joss said, smiling across the table at Polly. "You're fine."

"Thanks," Polly mouthed back.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Early the next morning, Polly rolled over and snuggled into Obiwan. Rebecca was with Kayla and Henry was already gone. He and Nate planned to forage through Ames and Des Moines for parts they needed for the Woodies they were rebuilding.

After dinner, she and Henry had taken Alistair back to the hotel and driven over to the Mikkels' house. Nate and Henry wanted to look online for the parts they needed. Polly knew she probably wouldn't see much of him for a few days. He didn't take time for his personal projects and he had so much fun with Nate that she was glad he was doing this.

He'd let the dogs out before he left this morning, kissed her goodbye, and told her to sleep in. She wondered how long she'd managed to stay in bed.

Checking her phone for the time, she sighed. "Eight fifteen," she said. "I might as well give up. Sleeping in isn't for me."

Obiwan licked her arm, but when Han heard her voice, he placed his front paws on her side and tried to lick her face.

"Back off, you slobbery thing," she said. His entire body wagged. "I know, I know. You're happy to have your human alive and alert." Polly sat up and he scrabbled into her lap. She hugged his neck and kissed the top of his head before moving everyone to the side so she could get out of bed.

Polly wandered through the living room and into the kitchen, being careful of the two cats who insisted on either stretching out directly in her path or weaving around her feet as she walked. "Death of me," she said. "You're going to be the death of me."

Henry had left a full pot of coffee and she sighed as she poured a cup out and breathed in the scent. She stood in front of the kitchen window and looked out at her little town. Two people were pulling weeds in the corner garden. The man looked up and she realized it was Sam Gardner. She and Henry needed to invite them over for dinner one of these evenings. Jean had taken a liking to Rebecca, inviting her to their home a couple of times. The first time Polly had gone with her. But within minutes, Jean made the girl feel at home in her kitchen and soon the two were chattering as they made a strawberry pie. Rebecca helped Jean with canning, putting up everything from beans and tomatoes to dill pickles and raspberry jam.

At the thought of jam, Polly's stomach rumbled and she sliced some bread and dropped it in the toaster. She wasn't sure how she'd gotten so fortunate in meeting the wonderful people that she knew. Her life as a child was so different than Rebecca's was going to be. It had been wonderful, she loved her Dad, Mary and Sylvester, but she hadn't had been exposed to other adults. There weren't any aunts and uncles in her life and her friends' parents were just nameless entities that gave permission to do things.

But Rebecca was learning about life from so many different people. She spent time with Beryl every Saturday morning and Bill Sturtz had enjoyed teaching the three kids how to carve wood this summer. Jean Gardner was giving Rebecca invaluable experience in the kitchen and the girl was enjoying it all.

There had been some rough nights the first month after Sarah's death. Polly and Obiwan usually crept into her bedroom after she'd spent time crying to make sure that she would relax enough to fall asleep. The dog was gentle with Rebecca, climbing up beside her and settling in. Polly generally sat in the chair beside her bed and held her hand. She wanted Rebecca to grieve and cry, but didn't want her to have to do any of it alone.

After a few weeks, the nights weren't quite as long and the days began to brighten again. In the beginning of the grief process, Rebecca was desperate to see Evelyn. They'd spent so much time together that their connection was strong. Evelyn would pick Rebecca up and take her away, sometimes out for lunch, other times out for a drive and every once in a while, they would sit outside behind Sycamore House by themselves and just talk. This was another adult who was a big part of Rebecca's life.

The toast popped up and Polly reached up for a plate. She buttered it and spread some of Rebecca's jam on top, then sat at the peninsula. She was spending too much time reflecting this morning. But in truth, she didn't know what to do with herself today. It was all hers. She didn't have to be anywhere or do anything. Polly leaned back and stretched. What a great day.

Then she remembered Grey and the conversation Jeff was planning to have with him this morning. It bothered Polly that she hadn't realized. He never seemed hung over and when she'd been with him, there was no hint that he had a drinking problem.

She wanted to text Jeff and ask more questions. When was he going to talk to Grey? Had he already? What was he going to say? How was he going to handle it?

Leia sniffed the plate on the counter and Polly instinctively moved it away. But it broke her concentration.

"No," she said, pushing the cat back. "You don't get my breakfast. I get my breakfast." She picked the cat up, snuggled her and then reached down to release her onto the floor.

"Okay kids, it's time to get moving. First a shower, then I have no idea what. But it's going to be fun!"

~~~

"Hey Andrew, it's just you and me again today. Wanna hang out?" Polly asked, stopping at his nook under the stairs. He'd moved most of his books to his room at home, leaving nothing on the shelves and only pens, pencils and paper in the desk.

"Nah, it's okay," he said.

"Come on. We haven't been alone forever. I want an adventure. Come with me," she pleaded.

"Didn't you already find your dead body?" He scratched a pencil on a sheet of paper, circling round and round until he'd created a tornado.

Polly gently popped him on the back of the head. "Nope. You don't get to mope. You have to come with me. I feel too good to let one of my favorite people feel sorry for himself."

"What's Henry got to do with it?" Andrew asked, looking up at her with a hint of a grin.

"That's right. He's feeling sorry for himself because he gets to spend the entire weekend playing with car stuff. Come on. First stop, the coffee shop and we'll tell your mom that we're leaving town together."

He finally laughed and stood up. Andrew was practically as tall as Polly and he was still just as adorable as ever. She wanted to squeeze him tight, but knew that would make him miserable.

"Let me go upstairs and get my book," he said. "Just in case you find yourself in a girly store somewhere."

"Run. I'll meet you in the truck."

Andrew attempted to move past her to get to the door leading upstairs and Polly stepped into his path. When he moved to the left, she mimicked him.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed. "Hugging you. Thanks for coming out with me today. I wanted a partner in crime and didn't know who I might find."

He went limp in her grasp until she let go, then looked at her, waiting until she moved.

"Fine," she said. "Go upstairs. I'll be the lonely old lady in the truck." She let him pass and smiled to herself. Now the day had potential. Andrew was usually up for anything, no matter how crazy it got.

She sat in her truck and fiddled with the digital readouts. They hadn't taken the time to read the manual, but so far she'd managed to make everything work. She loved the backup camera. One of these days she planned to scare the daylights out of Henry with it.

"I'm ready," Andrew said, climbing in and buckling up. "Do you know where we're going?"

"First to the coffee shop. They're still giving away free coffee and I want to see who shows up."

Andrew put his book on the seat beside him. "You know, don't you?"

"Know what?" Polly asked, backing out of the garage.

"Rebecca told you. I know she did."

"Why don't you tell me your side?"

"Because she hates me. I don't know why I thought..."

"Thought what?"

"It sounds stupid. And really mean."

Polly stopped at the highway, waiting for traffic to pass. She looked at him. "What do mean - mean?"

"I thought she was mine and that just sounds bad. She's not anybody's. But I guess I thought we were together already."

"I suppose that assuming something without having a conversation isn't too bright," Polly said. "Did you think about
asking
her to the dance?"

"I did ask!"

"Are you sure that's how the conversation went?" Polly glanced at him, not surprised to see confusion on his face.

"I asked her to go to the dance with me," he repeated. "What else would I have done?"

Polly pulled into a parking space next to the coffee shop and turned the truck off. "Think back over your conversation. Did you truly ask her or did you make an assumption and set forth an expectation." She opened her car door and smiled over at him.

"A what?" he asked.

"You think about it while we're inside. We'll talk about it when we get back in the car. If you can't figure it out on your own, I'll be glad to help you through it." She held the front door open and breathed in the scent of coffee. It was heavenly. There were several people at tables around the room, all smiling, with drinks in front of them.

Camille waved at her from behind the counter, where she was working with Helena at the cash register. The older woman nodded, taking it all in. Everybody was on site today. Sky and Rena were hovering behind the counter, talking animatedly to each other and Benny was wiping tables.

"What do you think?"

Polly jumped and spun around. Jeff had come up behind her.

"I don't know," she said. "What do
you
think?"

"It's going to be okay. We need to replace Julie, but not right away. It seems kind of crass."

Andrew leaned in. "That was the dead girl Polly found?"

"Yes," she replied, scowling at him. "Go get something to drink and find your mom."

Andrew walked away from them and Polly asked, "How did it go?"

"With Grey?"

"Yes. What happened this morning? I've been dying to know, but didn't want to bother you."

"I talked to him. He's an alcoholic."

Polly's shoulders slumped. "Damn it."

"He admitted it right away," Jeff said. "He's gone through rehab and has been clean for twelve years. He thought he could handle it but after the accident, he just didn't have it in him."

"What are we going to do?"             

Jeff shrugged. "That's up to you. He says it is completely up to you. He promised to find an AA meeting and get a sponsor - someone to talk to. But if you want him gone, he'll go."

"I don't want him to go," Polly replied. "But what if he can't get this dealt with?"

"He told me that he was willing to be accountable. He promised to call me this evening and tell me that he'd been to a meeting and had a sponsor."

"And tomorrow? What about tomorrow and the next day?" Polly asked.

Jeff smiled at her. "You do know that one of the major tenets of AA is that they take it one day at a time. If you want to trust him to make these steps, then that's what we have to do. If you don't want to, he'll understand and move on."

"I know it sounds crazy," Polly said. "But I want to trust him. We've only known him a week, but like I told Henry, he's worth it. I just know it."

"That's my girl," Jeff said. He hooked his arm in hers and led her to the counter. "Do you know what you'd like to order today?"

Polly looked up at the wall and then at Sky who had come over to greet her. "Hey there, Miss Giller," he said. "What would you like to drink?"

"I'd like an iced mocha," she said.

"Anything special?" he asked.

"Nope," she laughed. "Just bring on the caffeine."

He smiled and turned back to Rena.

"Is Sal here?" Polly asked Jeff. "She should be enjoying this after all that she's been through to get here."

"She and Sylvie are in the bakery - plotting."

"Polly!" Camille exclaimed. "I'm so glad you're here. Do you have time to meet my mother?"

Polly glanced around the shop. "I'd love to."

Sky handed her a cup, Polly took a tentative drink and scowled.