Lonesome Bride (4 page)

Jed saw that knowledge in her eyes, however, and cursed himself. He knew he was wrong for berating her, even if the knowledge she was no innocent had strangely upset him. Why should he care if she had given herself to one or a dozen other men? That was not his concern. He was angry with himself for allowing her beauty to tempt him into almost betraying his father. That she had done nothing to overtly encourage his kiss only made him feel worse.

Pride would not allow him to admit his mistake, however. Also, by shoving her away with words, he could guarantee she wouldn't end up in his arms again. He would have to keep her angry with him for the rest of the trip. She might end up hating him, but he didn't need her affection anyway. She was coming to Heatherfield to marry his father, not him.

"It's time to get set up,” Jed declared gruffly.

Caite nodded, tiny shining tears slipping down her cheeks and catching the late afternoon sun like diamonds.

"I'll get started with the heavy stuff. Why don't you get supper ready?” He turned on his heel and walked away from her.

Caitleen nodded numbly at Jed's suggestion. Bending slowly, for she felt she might just slump to the ground and stay there, she reached for her hat and placed it back on her head. Jed's words had cut her deeply. How could he accuse her of being a fallen woman? Yes, she had given in to his kiss, and had thoroughly enjoyed it. But they were going to be married. It was not as if she has allowed a complete stranger to place his hands on her.

She allowed herself, for one brief moment, to recall the sensations Jed's kiss had awakened in her. He tasted like wood smoke and sunlight, and his probing tongue had caused shivers of delight to run up and down her spine like dancing fairies. The few pecks she had shared with Billy Worthe behind the carriage house had not prepared her for a real man's touch.

Shaking off her recall of Jed's kiss, Caite forced herself to put one foot in front of the other until she was walking to where he had thrown the food basket. As she bent to begin unpacking it, however, her knees gave way and she sank to the ground. Ashamed, but unable to help herself, Caite buried her face in her hands and sobbed. Pressing her knuckles against her teeth so hard they nearly bled, she attempted to keep her moans as silent as possible. She did not want Jed to know she was crying.

He doesn't deserve to see my tears, she told herself fiercely. Even if he had caused them.

Slowly, by sheer force of will, Caite managed to control herself. Scrubbing her face with the hem of her skirt, she concentrated on taking deep breaths until she could breathe normally. Jed's accusations raced through her mind, but she forced herself to disregard them.

Obviously, he expected his bride to behave in a certain manner. Maybe he was testing her. I might hate his methods, Caite thought grimly, but I have little choice. It was him or Drake Hammond, and Jed Peters still seemed the lesser of two evils.

Not matter how difficult it would be, she vowed to keep her temper. I'll be as sweet and innocent as a newborn lamb, she thought vehemently. She would pass his stupid tests, and any others he threw at her.

Working efficiently, Caite soon had spread a blanket with an assortment of delicious looking food. As she carefully arranged the plates and put the last touches on the slices of meat and pie, she once more forced herself to breathe deeply. In, out. In, out. There. She was calm now. Plastering a cheery smile on her face, she called for Jed. “The food is ready!"

"Good thing, too,” Jed boomed with false heartiness, striding over. “I'm starving."

"Well, there certainly's plenty more where this came from,” Caite noted, peeping into the basket. The sight of all that food had nearly restored her good humor, and she favored Jed with a broad grin. “You must've been expecting quite a woman."

For a moment, Jed stared at her, brows knitted.

"Is something wrong, Jed?” Caite asked, at a loss as to what could have upset him now. Truth be told, she was becoming a trifle weary with his moodiness. “Is there something else you would like?"

"No, everything looks fine,” he said gruffly. “Let's just eat."

They munched in silence for a while. Caitleen tucked in heartily, polishing off a slice of roast beef and two legs in the time it took Jed to finish his first piece of chicken. As he watched, Caite began her third drumstick, chewing away and alternating bites with some of the good sourdough biscuits. Despite wiping her mouth between every bite, her appetite was more lumberjack than lady.

Catching Jed's stare of amazement, Caitleen stopped chewing and swallowed heavily. “Is there something on my face?"

Jed looked chagrined she had caught him staring. Shaking his head roughly, he began gnawing his own drumstick with fervor. Caite continued to look at him quizzically. Jed swallowed his own mouthful and waved his chicken bone at the remains of her meal.

"You eat more than I would've expected, that's all."

Caite looked at the desiccated remains in front of her and smiled ruefully. “I suppose I must seem a frightful hog. You see, I haven't had the pleasure of eating so well in quite some time."

"Why not?"

"I told you that after my mother died,” Caite began, “my Da began gambling away everything we owned. His holdings were the first to go, of course, but it was not long before what my mother had brought to their marriage was lost as well. I suppose I could justify his behavior by saying he was distraught with grief over losing the woman he loved, and I suppose that is true. However, nothing excuses the way he frittered away everything we had, every memory of my mother."

She paused for a long moment. “In recent years, his gambling has worsened considerably. We have nearly nothing left except the house. We had to let nearly all the servants go, and, of course, the household budget was severely curtailed. I think I've lived on beef stew for months. This food is heavenly, but I do apologize for making a glutton of myself."

"It sounds like you deserve to make a glutton of yourself,” Jed replied. He shoved the tin of apple pie toward her. “Here, have yourself a slice."

Caite laughed, holding her stomach in protest and waving away the proffered pie. “Good mercy, no! I could not possibly!"

"You know you want to.” Jed grinned, pushing the pie even closer to her. “It's just calling your name, Caitleen O'Neal. Can't you hear the little voices saying ‘Eat me! Eat me!’”

Caite giggled, grabbed a knife and began slicing the sumptuous looking dessert. “Well, maybe just a tiny slice."

Two pieces for each of them later, Caite burped contentedly and sighed. In a slow drawl that imitated him, she said, “I reckon that was the best meal I've eaten in a mighty long time."

"Maybe I'll fatten you up yet,” Jed replied, grinning. He stretched out beside her on the blanket. His mood had turned pleasant for a change.

Caite stretched and yawned, tipping her head back to gaze at the rapidly darkening sky. “Twilight comes quickly here."

"It sure does. In a little while, the stars'll come out. You won't have seen stars like that before, I reckon. Not back East anyway. The sky looks like black velvet with diamonds sewn all through it."

Caite looked at him. “You love it here."

"I'd never trade it for anything,” Jed agreed. He cradled his hands behind his head, relishing the last few moments of relaxation before he would have to build the night's fire.

"I'd give anything for a hot bath and a soft bed,” Caite declared, stretching so all the tiny bones in her back crackled like breaking ice.

Her words seemed to slap away Jed's good humor. He scowled, getting to his feet and gathering some brush for the fire. He didn't look at her.

"There's a stream just over there,” he said gruffly. “You can go have a dip, if you like."

He gets angry so quickly, Caite thought. She tried to restore the earlier light mood. “I don't suppose the water will be hot?"

Jed looked as though he were going to snap at her again, then saw she was joking and relaxed.

"It's just over that way.” He pointed. The stream ran just below the knoll where they had eaten. “You won't be very far away. The moon's coming up, and you'll have plenty of light to see. I'll be right here."

Caite got to her feet, brushed her skirts and busied herself with once again putting the food back into the basket. “I think I shall do just that, Jed. I need to get rid of some of this road dust. Today was so hot, I believe I will relish a dip, even if the water is icy."

After she had cleared away the remains of supper, Caite gathered her bathing necessities from her trunk and went to the stream. Not very deep, it burbled and chuckled its way past her and around a bend. Placing her towel, soap and hairbrush on a convenient rock, Caite carefully began undoing the many buttons on the front of her now-begrimed traveling dress.

Sewn from blue serge, the material was heavy and she was relieved to rid herself of the overjacket and ankle-length skirt. When she was down to her white linen chemise, she paused. Glancing to the top of the knoll where she could just discern the glow of the campfire, Caite decided to risk removing everything. She sincerely doubted Jed would make his way down there. If he could hardly bear to see her without a hat, he would never risk seeing her in the altogether.

With that decided, she shucked off the chemise and stretched gloriously in the night air. The moon was just beginning to peep over the horizon, and silver tinged the landscape everywhere. Caite felt very naughty as a slight breeze caressed her bare skin, teasing her nipples erect and raising goosebumps on her arms.

"No sense in waiting,” she muttered grimly to herself, fearing the chill of the water. Before she could change her mind, she plunged into the stream up to her knees. Letting out a gasp of surprise, Caite sank until the water came up to her chin. After the initial shock, the stream was very pleasant. As the day's dust sloughed off her, she wriggled in delight. It felt so good to be clean!

Wading back to the edge of the stream, she plucked her lilac-scented soap from the rock and then went back to the deeper water. Caitleen hummed as she soaped herself luxuriously from head to toe, sinking into the water periodically to rinse. She even took the time to scrub the full length of her hair until it squeaked. When she had thoroughly rinsed away the last bit of soap, Caite again waded back to the edge and began to dry herself.

The night was cooler than the day had been, but not unpleasantly so. She would dry in no time. She sat on the rock, towel loose around her hips, and began combing out her waist-length mass of auburn curls. Being clean made her feel almost like a new person. She could nearly forget all the bad things that had happened today—even being accused of immoral behavior. There was nothing better than a cool dip after a hot day, although a long, hot soak in a scented tub would have been nice, too.

She only hoped that when she returned to camp Jed would not spoil her mood with another angry outburst. She just wanted to hold onto her sense of well-being for the night.

Jed stared at the water nymph outlined in silver below him. His chest felt tight and his breath grew short as he devoured the sight of Caite, hair unbound and pale skin glowing in the moonlight. The sound of her happy, tuneless humming wafted to him on the breeze, and he caught the scent of her. He groaned. Before he knew what he was doing, he had stumbled down the short hill to stand in front of her.

He had no accusations this time. He did not trust his voice. Instead, he merely grasped Caite by the upper arms and pulled her upward until she was standing. Keeping his gaze locked on her emerald eyes, wide with surprise, he groped for the towel on which she had been sitting. Finding the square of material with his fingers, he quickly wrapped the cloth around her until she was somewhat covered.

"You should be more careful,” he whispered hoarsely. “You might catch a chill."

Caitleen rubbed her arms self-consciously.

Perhaps his grip had hurt her. Jed forced his fingers to release her, noting with some dismay the red marks they had left on her creamy flesh.

"It is a warm night, Jed,” she said gently.

"You don't know this area, Miss O'Neal,” retorted Jed. His protests sounded weak even to him. “The night air can be dangerous."

Caite pulled the towel closer about herself. “I will be more careful. Thank you for the warning."

"I don't want you catching sick,” Jed continued. Talking was the only way to keep from crushing his mouth down on hers.
Tarnation!
The way she was staring at him, wide-eyed and still wet from her bath, he wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms and taste every part of her.

A tiny grin touched Caitleen's lips. “I appreciate your concern, Jed. Was there anything else?"

Was she teasing him on purpose? “No, of course not. It's getting late, and we should go to bed. That is, to sleep."

Cursing his fumbling tongue, Jed turned from her and hurried up the grassy slope as quickly as he could with his groin practically singing Ave Maria. Once back at the campsite, he let out a low mumble of curses directed at himself. So much for keeping her angry with him. Now the tempting redhead would think he was an addle-pated fool, and he couldn't blame her. He was acting like a fool. It seemed the bewitching Caitleen O'Neal was weaving a tempting spell around him, one he didn't really want to resist.

But I have to, if I want to retain my self-respect, Jed thought. And blast it all, if he didn't have that, he didn't have anything.

When Caite at last returned to the fire, fully covered in her white linen shift, Jed had already curled up in his bedroll, feigning sleep. Not wanting to risk another encounter with the delectable Caitleen O'Neal, he had rolled himself away so he could not see her. Keeping his eyes from the sight of her could do nothing to clear the vision from his mind, though.

It's going to be a long night, Jed thought somewhat grumpily. He shifted in order to alleviate the pressure against the front of his trousers.
A damn long night.