Lilith - TI3 (13 page)

Yemaya didn't miss the use of the word
live
s instead of life... nor the strange reference to the
god
she knew. Frowning, she leaned forward and placed her hand over Cammie's and squeezed it. A sensual warmth crept up her arm and through her body before settling gently in the groin area. It was disquieting, but she refused to release her grip.

"I do not believe any god would punish you for something you cannot control. He or she wouldn't be much of a god then. So... this
energy
you project... I take it, you were born with it?"

Cammie nodded.

"It's unusual but not unheard of amongst Cambions."

"Cambions?"

"I'll get to that later, but to answer your question, yes."

"Then it is a part of you. Surely you do not blame yourself for what is part of your natural makeup."

"Not really, but I can for how I use it."

"That may be true... but you do not strike me as a woman who would intentionally hurt someone. Why else would you be here? Your concern for Dakota is real."

"To redeem myself? Perhaps I've grown weary of the way I am and want something more... or maybe I'm just fooling myself into thinking I can be someone I'm not."

"Listen, Cammie. I know we have just met. I may not know your past or the things you have done... but I would know if you were amoral. Trust me on this."

"I'm not sure why but I do," Cammie replied, quietly, smiling for the first time.

"Good. Now, tell me about this power and why Dakota acted so strangely."

"Well, as you said, it's part of me. Some would call it a gift."

"Gift?"

"Yes. I sometimes think the Fates are either cruel or have a wicked sense of humor."

"I know what you mean."

"I imagine you do. Anyway, in my first life, as a child I learned I was born from lust and hatred. My parents couldn't stand each other."

First life
, 
wondered Yemaya but decided not to ask.

"They must have felt something more."

"Not really. Only the need to dominate and possess each other. They didn't love each other. It was just copulation. The very act defiled the meaning of love. Their only purpose in life was to seduce whomever they wanted. Neither felt compassion nor desire. In the end, they destroyed everything they touched. I was a mistake... the unfortunate combination of poor timing and bad luck... and both of my parents were appalled to discover their attempts at dominance had resulted in my conception."

"Surely they loved you after you were born."

Cammie's laughter held no humor.

"They don't know the meaning of love, although I have to admit it's not their fault. It just isn't a part of their natural makeup. I sometimes think that’s the reason I’m the way I am. Anyway, I've always believed life was a balance, good and bad, love and hate. I guess I'm proof of the latter. Because my parents were filled with so much hatred, I was born to be loved, an immeasurable, eternal, shallow love that is fleeting at best."

"Fleeting? I am not sure I follow you,"

"I know. Sorry. Let me see if I can explain this better. You asked about my power. People around me quickly fall in love with me and just as quickly fall out. That's what Dakota experienced."

"I see. So, this love... it is not real?"

"Oh, it's real. If Dakota were to stay by my side, I could make her the happiest woman in the world. I could pleasure her in ways you couldn't even imagine... a word, a look. She would be mine and willingly agree to my whims. I could satisfy her every desire, her every wish, her every need. I could fulfill her wildest desires and fantasies... and you could do nothing to stop me."

"I think you underestimate me," Yemaya stated confidently.

"No, I know she loves you more than life itself. I can feel it, but she still wouldn’t be able to resist wanting me. You saw her last night. Was that the woman you thought you knew?"

Yemaya had to agree. Her Dakota would never have acted like she had the night before.

"Good, now you'll know how to deal with the situation whenever she's around me."

"And that would be?"

"Through understanding. No more, no less. She'll always be yours. It's your destinies. Besides, I would never do anything to compromise her love for you or yours for her. It's too rare a gift."

Yemaya nodded her thanks.

"Your life must be very lonely."

"Yes. Ironic, isn't it. I have had thousands of lovers. Most of them fleeting, a few lasted longer but in the end, everyone moved on. It's a part of my life I've come to accept."

"Perhaps that is your problem... your acceptance. Obstacles should not just be accepted. They are challenges to conquer or die trying."

Shaking her head, Cammie laughed.

"Ah. An optimist. You surprise me. I thought you'd be more of a realist."

"I am both. I will never accept that fate controls my destiny. I make my own. It sounds like you have let it make yours. Perhaps it is time for a change."

"You make it sound so easy."

"I never said that. I cannot imagine how awful your life has been. I can only tell you what I think I would do if I were in your situation."

"Well, actually, my life hasn't been awful. Awful would be my parent's lives, to exist without experiencing love is to not exist at all. Like I said, I have never not known it. That is my future... my destiny. It may not be perfect but I'll take it over a life without love."

"You have a point. So tell me, who are your parents? I noticed, earlier, you said lives not life."

Before Cammie could answer, Kali walked up to the table.

"You want anything else?" she asked curtly, giving Yemaya a sulky look.

"No thank you," Yemaya said, sensing an animosity toward her. Looking at the dark skinned woman, she tried to make eye contact, curious as to the reason, but the woman refused to look at her.

"Cammie, would you like something?"

The subtle change in her tone and attitude made it obvious Kali's anger was directed entirely at Yemaya.

Interesting
!
Yemaya thought.

"No thanks, Kali," Cammie answered. "Maybe in a little while, though, if you don't mind."

"Sure thing," Kali muttered, moving away to check on other customers.

"She likes you."

"Everyone likes me," Cammie replied.

"Maybe. But I think hers is different."

"Well, Kali is around me a lot. She's bound to suffer my effects."

Realizing Cammie was uncomfortable with this particular topic, Yemaya changed the subject.

"You were telling me about your parents."

For the first time, Cammie made complete eye contact with Yemaya.

"Was I?"

Laughing, Yemaya nodded, knowing the woman was playing with her.

"I hope so. It would be cruel to leave me guessing now."

"Ah, yes. We can't have that now, can we? Would you believe me if I said mom was a succubus?"

Rocking back in her chair, Cammie watched for a reaction. When she didn't get one, she tilted her head to the side and waited.

"And your father?"

"Incubus."

"I see... and you are?"

"Technically, I am a Cambion and offspring of that type of union."

"I would say that explains the lust and hatred you mentioned earlier."

"You don't seem surprised. Most people would think I was crazy. That's if they even knew what I was talking about."

"I find it more surprising you are so open about it. As for me, few things surprise me anymore. I have seen too much in my life to doubt most things." Yemaya said, shrugging slightly. "I must admit, I have never heard of Cambions."

"We're rare. Incubi and Succubi normally detest each other. Just finding themselves in the same place usually ends up in a battle. The two species keep as much distance as possible unless we're called to a
gathering
. Serious dissension isn’t permitted at our conclaves."

Yemaya remained silent for a few seconds as she absorbed the information. Long ago she had learned to suspend all disbelief' when it came to the existence of supernatural life.

"By gathering, I assume you mean...?"

Cammie laughed.

"You know exactly what I mean."

"I am afraid I do... an orgy. I have to admit I find it hard to believe you are a demon."

"We're not all as bad as you think. You'd be surprised at how many of us want nothing more than to just live our lives... not that it was always like that. There was a time when we were ambitious."

"I guess time takes it toll on everyone."

"You could say that."

"So, are demons really immortal?"

Cammie shrugged.

"Who's to say? No one knows if they'll be here tomorrow. Some of us have been around a long time, but I can't say I believe in immortality."

"Why not?"

"I can die. I have died."

"You look pretty healthy for a dead woman," Yemaya teased.

"Well, at the moment I'm very much alive.  Still, I have no reason to believe I will always return."

"I would say you are a pretty good argument for it."

Cammie looked down at her glass and then took a sip.

"There was a time when this world was full of demons and spirits. Most are gone. No one really knows where. Every gathering is a reminder that our numbers are dwindling."

"From my experience, I would say there are still plenty around."

Laughing, Cammie twirled her glass playfully.

"I bet you do. Anyway, I've died so many times, I don't know who or what I am anymore. I take what life offer and try to enjoy the moments."

Yemaya watched the woman for several moments, trying to imagine what it would be like to be reincarnated. The thought wasn't necessarily distasteful but it was unsettling. Combine it with Cammie's so-called gift and... well... shaking her head, she didn't really know what to think.

"I think I would find your situation depressing."

"I do and have. There have been moments when I wanted to end it all, but then I wonder what would be the use. I'd just come back again or worse. I wouldn't come back at all. For all of my bitching, I'm not ready to give up on life. The thought of not existing at all actually frightens me a little... and I think killing myself is the key to my final destruction."

"I take it you have tried."

"Once, a long time ago. Not intentionally of course. I'm not suicidal. I remember feeling sad, depressed. I kept asking myself what good is love if it wasn't real, so I decided to isolate myself from humanity thinking I could just give it up. I moved as far away from people as I could and then I found out I needed them more than they needed me. Within weeks I became so sick I thought I was going to die. Then this old woman found me. She told me she understood my needs. Some of her people carried me to a nearby village. Then they just disappeared. I never got to thank them."

"So what caused this sickness?"

"Starvation, dependency. It appears love is like a drug. Without my fix, I have horrible withdrawal symptoms. A cruel twist, don't you think?"

"Perhaps. Then again, you give something in return? Those people affected by your power may never have experienced the emotion before meeting you."